Becoming An Adult
by Endzi
Summary: AU. Meredith is becoming an adult. Who is going to help her since she doesn't have her parents. Sorry I'm not good at writing a summary, just read and let me know what you think.
1. Chapter 1

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 1

"Christina please let's just go we've been here to long already. If my mom catches us here…"

"No Meredith. Look at your wrist. It looks broken and if I'm right you need a cast."

"This is so dumb. I can't believe I was so clumsy." Meredith started to get off the exam table. "Lets go I can wrap it at home."

Christina stood in front of the door to block Meredith from leaving. "You are not going anywhere until a doctor looks at you." Christina crossed her arms over her chest and stared at Meredith who was staring back clearly upset so she continued. "Do you really want to fight me with one hand?"

Meredith was about to respond when the door opened and in stepped the doctor. "Hello. I'm Dr. Sheppard and how can I help you?"

"Can't you read?" Christina asked clearly annoyed.

"Excuse me?"

"Well doesn't it say there in that chart you're holding?"

Dr. Sheppard smiled. "I guess it does but I always ask when I come in just in case something was forgotten." He paused and turned to the dark blond who was still standing by the exam table looking at the floor. "Now Alex, why don't you tell me what happened."

Christina could tell Meredith hadn't remembered the name she gave. "Alex, Dr. Sheppard is asking a question. Do you want me to tell him?"

Dr. Sheppard looked from Alex to the other girl. He could tell something wasn't right but he didn't want to push. He was about to say something when the dark haired girl spoke again.

"Alex!"

Finally she looked up. "Oh I'm sorry, what was it you needed?"

"I was hoping you could tell me what happened while I examine you." He motioned for her to take a seat on the exam table.

Meredith took her seat and let him examine her while she told her story. "I was cleaning out my closet and when I went to step out of it I tried to step over a pile of clothes I was going to give to charity and instead I fell. I tried to break my fall by putting put my arms and I guess I'm heavier than I thought. I called Christina to help me. She insisted I come here."

"Is it broke, it looks broke."

"She wants to be a doctor."

The doctor had finished his exam and smiled at the girls. "I believe it is broken. I want an x-ray just to be sure so I will be right back with a wheel chair to take you down."

"It's ok. Just…Can't you just put a cast on it so we can go?"

Dr. Sheppard stopped at the door. He saw a look of fear and pain cross her face. "It won't take long. I need to see the x-ray to make sure it's a clean break. Just give me a minute." When he finished speaking he stepped out of the room.

"Christina what if she's here? What if she sees me?"

"Calm down Meredith. Dr. Mcdreamy said he was going to take you himself. O you know what that means?"

"Dr. Mcdreamy?"

"Oh don't look at me like that you were thinking it too."

Meredith blushed. " I just don't want my mom to see me. Why couldn't you take me to Mercy instead?"

"If we had gone there you wouldn't have met Mcdreamy."

They both smiled. "Christina he's probably got a girlfriend and he's older than me so please stop it."

"Seriously Meredith how old do you think he is?"

"Christina it's Alex here and I don't know maybe 25 or older."

"No way, I'm guessing 21 or 22. I'll ask when he comes back."

"No you will not." Meredith said in a voice she didn't recognize as Christina smiled. They fell into silence.

"Derek what is that?"

"Mark it's a wheelchair, what does it look like?"

Mark rolled his eyes. "I know what it is. What are you doing with it?"

"I'm going to take a patient for an x-ray not that it's any of your business."

"Isn't that what nurses are for?"

"Mark you do realize the nurses could make your days here hell if they heard you say that right?"

Both Derek and Mark turned around. "Hey Addison, I thought you got in on a surgery?"

"I did but the patient died so I'm looking for a new patient. Anyways changing the subject won't help Mark. You better be more careful what you say or the wrong person will hear." Addison looked back to Derek. "So what are you doing?"

"I'm taking a patient for an x-ray."

"Why?"

"That's what I wanted to know."

"Shut up Mark. I think she's hiding something and I want to spend more time with her." 

Addison and Mark shared a look before looking back to Derek and Mark spoke. "Her?"

"Yes, she gave her name as Alex now if you two don't mind." Derek said and turned to walk away.

"No you don't Derek."

Derek rolled his eyes as he turned back around. "What is it Addi?"

"I've seen that look before Derek Sheppard."

"Addi I don't need this right now. I have to go." Derek turned and left Mark and Addison.

"What was that about?"

"He's falling for her." 

"He doesn't even know her." Mark said in shock.

Addison turned to leave but over her shoulder she spoke again. "Haven't you heard of love at first sight? See you at lunch and I'll try to explain it."

Mark smiled as Addison turned the corner.

"Alright Alex you chariot awaits. Get in."

Meredith smiled and got in.

"How old are you?"

"What?"

"You heard me. How old are you?"

"I'll be 22 in 2 months. Why does that matter?"

Meredith smiled. "Can we get this over with please?"

"Right here we go. We'll be back soon."

As soon as they were out of the room Meredith dropped her head. She knew going to get an x-ray was a bad idea but she also saw the look in Dr. Sheppard's eyes. He wasn't going to let her leave without one so she let him take her. She kept her head down the whole way there. On the way back Dr. Sheppard decided to try and get her to talk.

"So what's your name?"

"Alex and you already know that."

He stepped out from behind the wheelchair and pushed the stop button on the elevator and bent down in front of her. "I mean your real name."

Meredith tried to look away but for some reason she couldn't avoid looking into his eyes. "That is my name. We need to get back before Christina gets upset. Trust me you don't want to see her upset."

He knew just by looking into her eyes there was something else about her that he wanted to know. He wanted to know everything about her yet he knew this was probably the last time he would see her. He tried one more time to get her to tell him something. "How did you really break your wrist?" He watched her. She was about to say something when he cut her off. "Don't tell me I already know. I saw the x-ray and I watched your face when you told me that story earlier so I would like the truth."

"It wasn't a story, I fell."

"You know you don't have to lie to me. Christina is not here so you can tell me what happened. I'd like to help you if you let me."

"Dr. Sheppard, it wasn't a lie and I don't need help. Thank-you for your concern but there's no reason for it, I'm fine."

Derek watched her for a second and stood. "Alright Alex." He drug her name out wanting to let her know he still didn't believe her. He pushed the stop button again and the elevator started. "Let's get you back to Christina."

As they entered the room Christina stood. "Finally!"

"Sorry it took longer than expected but she's ready to go. I just need her to sing some papers."

"Give it up Mcdreamy. We already filled out all the paper work we need to."

"Mc what?" Derek asked looking from Christina to Alex.

"Mcdreamy. She gives everyone a Mc nickname. It's her thing. Sorry."

He smiled. "So what's yours."

"I don't have one. I'm her person."

"That's what you think."

Meredith was about to say something but Dr. Sheppard cut her off. "What is it?"

"Mcstubborn, Mcstupid, Mc…"

Meredith stood up. "Christina, I thought I was your person?"

Dr. Sheppard smiled.

"You are my person that's why I can tell you the truth. Your name changes depending on the day." Christina smiled and turned to the Dr. "So Dr. Mcdreamy are you really a doctor?"

"Why would you ask that?"

"Because you said you were turning 22."

"I'm and intern if you must know."

"And you were taking care of my friend."

"Christina I'm fine. We need to go." Meredith said as she was looking out the door.

Derek noticed her posture change after she spoke. He felt like she was going to run so he wanted to stop her. "So how old are you?"

"What's it to you?"

"You asked me and I told you. I think it's only fare."

"Yeah ok. I'm 18 and Mmm…"

"Christina."

"And Alex is 17 but her birthday is in 2 months."

He was pleased with the information. "Really when is your birthday? Mine is March 1st."

"Christina we need to go now. I mean it." Meredith said as she grabbed her arm and pulled her through the door.

"It's March 3rd Mcdreamy." Christina shouted as Meredith pulled her out the door.

He smiled as he watched them leave.

Mark came up to Derek having heard the girl. "Who's Mcdreamy?"

"I am."

"What?"

"Sheppard, Sloan let's go."

"Coming Dr. Webber."

"Let's go. Are you up for drinks tonight at Joe's?"

"As long as you tell me about Mcdreamy."

Derek smiled. "Ok then come on before he tells our resident."

They both left.

Christina and Meredith made it to Christina's car. "Jeez Mer what's gotten into you?"

"I saw my mom across the room when I was standing in front of the door and I didn't want to chance seeing her again." Meredith spoke so fast she was almost out of breath.

"Calm down. She didn't see us." Christina wanted to lighten the mood. "So what did you and Mcdreamy talk about while you were gone?"

"He asked me my name."

"Are you kidding me? He already knew your name, is he really that dumb?"

Meredith was smiling. "It wasn't like he was asking my name exactly."

"Alright Mc…" Christina looked at Meredith and saw her look so she thought better of calling her another Mc nickname. "Alright Mer what are you talking about?"

"I think he knew we were lying about my name."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously Christina. When he looked into my eyes it was like he could see right into me. I've never felt that way before. I know he's older than me but looking into his eyes it didn't matter."

"What about Luke?"

"It's different with him. Maybe that's why we haven't slept together yet."

"What?"

"You heard me. Luke and I we haven't…"

Christina cut her off. "Had sex. Meredith you have been with everyone you've had a relationship with for the last 3 years. Why not Luke?"

"I haven't." Meredith said in a soft voice.

"Mer?"

"Christina, I haven't been with anyone. You, Izzie, Alex, and George all have believed what everyone has been saying about me for years but it's not true."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because it was easier to let you believe the lies. Besides the drinking was always true. I just never let anyone get that close. That's why I always end up breaking up with them. They think I'm easy and when I won't let it happen they break up with me."

"I wish you would have told me."

"It's not that big of a deal." Christina was about to say something but Meredith didn't let her. "Besides you never asked."

"So is it different with Luke? Will he be your first?"

"No. He wants to be with me but I've told him I'm not ready. I'm surprised he's still with me but maybe he's in it for the long haul. I guess I'll find out."

"I'm sorry I wasn't a better person."

"Christina don't it's ok." Meredith wondered if she could tell her what happened with her wrist but then realized it was better to leave things alone. "So what are we doing tonight?"

"Izzie wants to go to a movie if you're up for it. And when do you get your cast off?"

"I have to go back in 6 weeks so it will be off by my birthday. I think a movie sounds good. Let's change."

They had pulled up to Meredith's house and went in to change.

Mark and Derek walked into the bar and took seats at the bar. "The usual Joe." Mark said and then he turned to Derek. "Ok we're here so start talking."

"You know you are a pain in the ass."

"So I've been told now stop stalling and talk."

Joe set two drinks in front of them. Both Derek and Mark thanked him.

"She said her name was Alex. She didn't give a last name but I guess she would have lied about that to."

"If you don't know her how do you know she was lying?"

"I honestly don't know. I just…when I looked into her eyes it was like I could see right through her and I know she was lying. I think she felt the same way. Mark I could read her emotions just by looking into her eyes. I don't believe her story about her wrist either. She was scared and sand and…"

Mark couldn't take anymore so he cut him off. "Is she hot?"

"She is so beautiful. I've never seen anyone as beautiful as her. I just want to get to know her."

"Derek what are you saying?"

"I think I am falling in love with her."

"You can't be serious Derek. You just met her. You said yourself you don't even know her name."

"I know. I guess I'll just have to wait and see what happens."

"You and your take everything on faith. So you left out the info about Mcdreamy."

"I was hoping maybe you forgot about that."

"I never forget so out with it."

"Her friend Christina gives everyone Mc nicknames. She's the one who gave me the name." Derek finished with a smile.

"No way."

"What are you talking about?"

"Hey Addison."

"Mark, Derek what did I miss?"

"Oh nothing Addison, Mcdreamy over there," he motioned to Derek. "He was just telling me about his patient."

Addison looked from Derek to Mark. "Mcdreamy?"

"I know come on I'll give you a ride home and tell you all about it."

"I never said you could tell her."

"You never said I couldn't."

"I didn't think I had to."

"Relax Derek it's not like you have a girlfriend I could go and tell."

Derek rolled his eyes. "Please don't start Addi."

"Derek I have known you and Mark for 15 years now. I just want you to be happy."

"I am happy."

"You're alone."

"I'm happy Addi, I promise."

Derek looked to Mark for help and Mark took the hint. "Come on sweetheart it's getting late."

"Fine but this discussion is not over Derek."

"Goodnight Addi, Goodnight Mark."

Both Addison and Mark said goodbye and left Derek at the bar. Derek sat for a little longer before heading home.

_There you have it. This is my first Grey's Anatomy story so if you have time please tell me what you think._


	2. Chapter 2

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 2

6 Weeks later

"Only 2 more weeks Meredith."

"2 more weeks to what Luke?"

"Until our birthdays and the best party of the year."

"Yeah right. You know I was thinking about that. Can we just go out for dinner and maybe a movie?"

"Meredith, Mike and John already planned the party and invited everyone. Besides this party just isn't just for you, it's for both of us not just you."

"I know, but I just really don't want to go to another party."

"We can't just tell everyone not to come. And even if we could I won't. Friday night is going to be the best night ever and I won't let you ruin that. Now quit acting like a baby not everything is about you."

"I'm sorry Luke."

"You should be. Your mother is right about you. It's no wonder she spends all her time in this hospital. I don't know why I am still with you." Luke walked to the door and looked out the window. "What is taking them so long. You already got your cast off why are we still here?"

"The doctor has to look at it and make sure it healed ok I guess."

"Shut up Meredith. I didn't ask you." He put his hand on the door. "I'm going to make a call. Come out when you're done and I'll take you home since you can't seem to do it yourself. That's just another thing your mother was right about." When he was done he left the room.

Once Luke was out of the room the tears that were in Meredith's eyes fell. She didn't know what had hurt more. The things Luke said or that he agreed with her mother.

Derek once again found himself in the pit. He had sutured a few cuts and was headed to his next patient with a smile on his face. He had found that for the last 6 weeks he couldn't get rid of it. He picked up the chart and when he opened it and saw the name on it his smile got even bigger.

"How can you be so happy down here all day?"

"Faith Mark."

Mark knew right away what he was talking about. "She's back isn't she?" He watched as Derek nodded. Mark had been listening to Derek talk about this girl for weeks and now he wanted to meet her. "Well let's go."

"No way Mark."

"What do you mean no way? I have been listening to you talk about her for weeks. I want to meet her. Now are you going to stand here all day talking to me or are we going into that room?"

"Fine, just behave yourself." Mark smiled as Derek pushed the door open and both entered. "Alex how is your wrist doing today?" He saw her sitting on the table with her dead down and right away he knew something was wrong. "Alex are you ok?"

Meredith knew she had to say something so she quickly wiped her eyes and looked up with a smile. "I'm fine doctor. Can you just do the exam so I can go? My ride is waiting outside and he's been waiting for a while now."

"Ok, well…" Derek was at a loss for words. When she looked at him he knew she had been crying and all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around her and comfort her.

Mark noticed her red eyes and then looked at Derek. He saw Derek's face change from joy to concern. When he heard Derek's words he knew he had to take over. "We looked at the x-ray and your wrist has healed very nicely. Do you have any questions?"

"No, no I'm…"

"Are you done yet? I can't believe..."

"Who are you?"

"I'm her boyfriend. Who are you two?" Luke asked pointing at the two doctors.

Derek was about to speak with Meredith spoke up. "Luke this is Dr. Sheppard and…"

"Dr. Sloan." Mark said as he offered his hand.

Luke didn't even acknowledge him. Instead he stepped towards Meredith. He leaned in and spoke so only she could hear. "How stupid are you that you don't even know your doctors names?"

Derek and Mark both watched Luke speak to the girl they both knew as Alex and they noticed how she reacted to whatever he said. They looked at each other with a look of anger and then they looked back to the other two in the room. Mark decided he would be the one to speak after seeing Derek he didn't trust him. "Luke why don't you wait outside, it should only be another 5 minutes or so."

He started walking to the door. "Fine just hurry up."

Once he had left the room Derek and Mark approached Alex. "Alright Alex again everything appears good so you are free to go unless you have any other problems."

"Thank-you Dr. Sloan." Meredith went to get off the exam table when Derek and Mark each grabbed an upper arm and elbow to help her down. Meredith flinched and pulled her arms out of both their hands.

"What's the matter Alex?" Derek quickly asked with worry.

"Nothing Dr. Sheppard. I'm fine."

Derek didn't believe her so he tried again. "Alex if you don't tell us what's wrong we can't help you."

"I'm fine."

Mark looked from Alex to Derek and knew Derek didn't believe her. He looked at her again and realized he didn't believe her either but he wasn't willing to risk his job and he didn't want Derek to either so he tried to calm him down. "Dr. Sheppard."

Meredith took that moment to get off the table and headed to the door. Derek saw her and he quickly reached out and grabbed her wrist. He wasn't going to let her run if he could help it.

Meredith was shocked and afraid when she felt his hand on her wrist. His touch sent shivers all through her. She quickly turned, "Dr. Sheppard let me go."

"Not until you tell me why you flinched when we were trying to help you."

"I said I'm fine."

"Derek." Mark tried again. He couldn't believe his friend was doing this. Derek was always the one to follow all the rules and now he was clearly breaking them.

Derek had enough. He looked from Mark to Alex and in one quick motion he forced her sleeve up. Both Mark and Derek inhaled their breaths quickly. Mark took a step forward and as Meredith stood in shock he pushed her other sleeve up to reveal an identical bruise. "What the hell happened?" Derek raised his voice.

Mark looked at Derek and saw his face was red. He then looked to Alex and saw a look of fear. He decide to soften his voice because he didn't want to scare her. "Alex what happened?"

"Answer him."

"Derek calm down."

"I will not calm down. Look at those bruises Mark." Derek said through clenched teeth. He then looked back to Alex. "Alex?"

This finally got through to her. She shook her head and pulled her arms free. "It's nothing, I'm fine. Thank-you for your help doctors. I really need to get going." Meredith then pulled down her sleeves and opened the door. She stepped out and saw Luke.

Luke stood up. "Finally let's go." He then started walking to the door.

Meredith followed behind with her head down.

"Alex!" Derek called. He was about to follow when Mark grabbed his arm.

"Derek you can't go after her."

"Mark you saw those bruises."

"I know but you can't help her if she won't let you."

"They were shaped like hands."

"I know. Come on you can buy me a coffee."

Derek looked away from the door and followed Mark. He knew Mark was right but he had a feeling that this was not the last time he would see her. He was happy for that but the stronger feeling was that the next time he would see her was not going to be on good terms and that scarred him.

Derek and Mark had lunch and talked. Mark listened as Derek explained his feelings about this girl. As Mark listened he realized he too was worried about her. He noticed how she was when her boyfriend came in and he saw the bruises on her arms. He then thought about Derek. He realized if he was feeling this bad then he knew Derek was feeling ten times worse because he knew Derek loved this girl even though he didn't even know her. He knew from looking at Derek that this girl had taken his friends heart and Derek had given it to her. When Derek grabbed her wrist and forced her sleeve up. He had never seen Derek like that before and if Derek had been wrong maybe things would be different but he wasn't wrong. All the sudden their pagers went off and they both took off to the ER.

2 Weeks later

"Meredith get your ass down here. I am not going to be late for my own party."

"I'm coming Luke, give me a minute."

"Sloan, Sheppard you too get the pit tonight since you are both on call tonight. And Montgomery Dr. Grey has requested you she should be getting ready to scrub in. I think she's in OR2, go find her."

Derek and Mark both headed to the pit and Addison headed to OR2.

Addison found Dr. Grey outside the OR. "Dr. Grey?"

"Dr. Montgomery, I need you to do something for me."

"Of course Dr. Grey whatever you need."

Dr. Grey grabbed a piece of paper and wrote something on it. She then handed it and a pink envelop to Addison. "I need you to go to my house and give this to my daughter. It's her birthday today and since I have surgery I won't be home to give it to her. I think she said she was going out so if she doesn't answer just drop it off and come back. I'm not really sure why Richard even remembered her birthday. Anyways when you get back you're in the pit."

Addison watched her walk away and started walking to the locker room to grab her purse and keys. As she entered the locker room she looked at the envelop and read the name. "Meredith."

"What was that Addi?"

Addison looked up. "I said Meredith."

"Who is that?"

"Dr. Grey's daughter."

"I didn't know she had a daughter."

"Neither did I."

"I don't think any of us did."

"So how did you find out? Why would she tell you?"

"Her daughter's birthday is today and she has surgery so she is sending me to go and drop this card off for her. Can you believe it, it's from the hospital gift shop?"

"What's wrong with that, at least she remembered?"

"She didn't remember Mark. She said Richard, Dr. Webber remembered. I just feel sorry for her."

"Dr. Grey?"

"No Derek her daughter, Meredith. I couldn't imagine having a mother who forgets your birthday."

"Well she is a good doctor."

"That's true but is it worth hurting your family? I have to go. I'll see you in a little bit. I'm with you guys when I get back."

They said their goodbyes and as Derek and Mark headed back to the pit, Addison left the hospital and headed to Dr. Grey's house. She pulled up in front of the house and saw a car in the driveway. She got out and headed to the front door. As she approached she heard yelling. Addison looked in through the window in the door. She saw a young man standing at the foot of the steps and a young woman approach him.

"You are not going to the party like that."

"Luke this is your favorite shirt, you bought it for me."

"I didn't buy it for you to wear to a party. It was meant for only me to see you in it. You look like a whore in it. Now go change."

"Luke if I change we are going to be late." Meredith took a step closer to him and reached for his hand. "Come on Luke."

Luke pulled away. "You slut." He shouted and then slapped her.

Meredith reached for her cheek as the doorbell sounded. She turned and saw a woman standing at the door so she headed to the door.

Addison was shocked when she saw the man hit the girl so she quickly ran the doorbell.

Meredith opened the door with a smile on her face. "How may I help you?"

"Are you Meredith?"

"Yes."

"Meredith Grey?"

Luke had come up behind Meredith. "She said it was what do you want?"

"I'm Addison Montgomery, Dr. Montgomery. Your mom asked me to stop by and give this to you." Addison handed Meredith the envelop.

"She forgot again."

Addison was taken back by the look on her face. "No she wanted me to tell you she's sorry that she won't be home tonight."

Meredith opened and read the card as Addison was talking. "You don't have to lie for her."

"I'm not."

"It's sweet really but this is Richards hand writing."

Luke grabbed the card and tossed it aside. "We have to go."

"This is Luke, my boyfriend. Thank-you Dr. Montgomery for dropping this off but we need to get going." Meredith said with a smile.

Addison saw the smile but didn't believe it. "Are you sure?"

"Yes I am. We are going to our birthday party so again thank-you." Meredith said as she closed the door.

Addison turned and slowly started to walk away but stopped when she heard Meredith.

"I'll be right back Luke."

"Where are you going?"

"To change."

"We don't have time."

"But you wanted me to change."

"You are just as stupid as your mom says no wonder she doesn't remember your birthday. Let's go."

Addison hurried to her car and headed back to the hospital. Once she arrived she quickly put her purse in the locker room and hurried to the pit. All she wanted to do was work. When she got down to the pit she found Mark.

"You're back. How did she take it?"

"What?"

"Meredith, how did she take the news that her mother wasn't going to be home for her birthday?" Addison didn't answer. Mark grabbed her arm and pulled her into an exam room. "Addison?"

"Mark she knew her mother forgot. She wasn't even surprised. She said it was Richard's hand writing." Mark pulled her into a hug. "It wasn't just that." Addison pulled away and noticed Derek who had now entered the room.

"What's going on, Addi are you alright?"

"Addison was just telling me about Dr. Grey's daughter. She said she knew her mom forgot because the card was in Richard's hand writing."

"Wow pour kid."

"I think she's being abused." Both Derek and Mark looked at her as she continued. "When I got there I heard her talking to her boyfriend. He didn't like what she was wearing. He called her a whore and a slut. He slapped her. By the way she reacted I could tell it wasn't the first time he had hit her. When I was leaving he called her stupid. I shouldn't have left."

"What could you have done Addi?"

"I don't know Mark but…"

Derek interrupted her. "Did she introduce you to the boyfriend?"

"Yeah he seemed like a real jerk."

"What was his name?"

"Luke."

Derek couldn't say anything.

"Derek?"

"Addi what did Meredith look like?"

"She's petite, long brownish blond hair, skinny."

"Derek?"

"Mark it's her."

"You don't know that for sure."

"It's her."

Mark didn't want to admit it but he knew Derek was right.

"Will one of you tell me what you are talking about?"

"The girl with the broken wrist, the one Derek has fallen for. We think Meredith is her."

"You said her name was Alex." Addison said.

"We think?"

"Yes Derek. I don't really want to admit it but I think you are right."

"I didn't believe her when she told me her name was Alex. She was ling to me."

"I know Derek but you can't make someone talk if they don't want to."

Addison didn't know what to say. She knew she didn't believe Meredith when she told her she was alright. If this is the same girl, what is it about this girl that is making her two friends feel this way about her. And why am I all the sudden worried about her?

"I have to find her." Derek said as he went to turn around towards the door.

Mark stepped in front of him. "You don't know where to look."

"I can't just wait around."

They all looked down at their pagers that were going off. Mark looked at Derek. "You won't be waiting, you'll be saving lives. Let's go."

All three of them left the room and headed to the nurses' station. Addison approached first. "What have we got coming in?"

A nurse looked up. "There was a car accident. 2 traumas are coming in they are about 2 minutes out."

_Thank-you, Thank-you, Thank-you to those of you who have reviewed: Save-A-Broom-Ride-A-Chaser, lost-in-a-moment, f4fan90, forever is our today, -emiiLYx3 (Thank-you for the info on their ages. For my story I didn't want that much of an age difference. Don't get me wrong I don't have anything against having an age difference in a relationship.), Shy Butterfly, Greys has become my life (I hope you don't figure out each chapter!), and Zappy92. You all have made me want to get this chapter up as soon as possible and to be honest I almost have chapter 3 done. You guys are awesome. I hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think._


	3. Chapter 3

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 3

Luke pulled up in front of a house. There were already cars all over and they could hear music from inside. He shut off the car and went to get out when Meredith grabbed his arm. Luke stopped and looked back at her. She smiled at him. "Happy birthday Luke."

"You too babe." He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "Now come on. The parties inside and so is my present."

Meredith saw the smile on his face before he got out of the car. She then followed and after she closed her door she followed him into the house. When they got inside they ran into Christina. "Happy birthday Mer."

"Hey Christina. You know it's my birthday too."

"Yeah whatever."

"I get it." Luke gave Meredith a kiss on the cheek. "I'm going to go get a drink. I'll see you around." Luke walked away.

"Thanks Christina. You really should be nicer to him you know?"

"Yeah whatever, I don't like him and I don't hide things like you do so…"

Meredith wanted to change the subject. "So where are Izzie, Alex, and George?"

"Their around. I think Alex is over with some guys from the wrestling team and I don't know where George and Izzie are." Christina stopped and looked at Meredith. "What's the matter?"

"I'm fine."

"Mer, I'm your person remember you can't lie to me, really you can't lie period, you're a bad liar so tell me."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "My mom."

"She forgot again didn't she?" She watched Meredith nod. "I don't know why that upsets you, it's not new. Come on let's get a drink."

They both walked to the alcohol. Meredith noticed Luke across the room with a drink in his hands and she grabbed one as well. Soon both Meredith and Christina were starting to feel the effects of the alcohol. That's when they both stopped drinking knowing they would have to drive home.

Luke approached Meredith and Christina about 2 hours after they had arrived. "Hey babe lets go upstairs, I want my present."

Meredith could smell the alcohol and knew he was drunk. "I left it at home Luke."

"No you didn't it's upstairs."

"Okay Luke." Luke grabbed her hand and started to head upstairs but Meredith turned to Christina and asked her to find her before she left so she could say goodbye to everyone.

Luke led her upstairs to an empty room and once they were inside he closed the door and locked it.

Meredith was a little nervous. She could tell he was really drunk and there was something about him that was different this night. "Luke I really did leave your present at home." She watched Luke's face change. "Luke we should get going. I have to be up early tomorrow."

"Not until I get my present."

"What are you talking about? I told you it's at home."

Luke stepped closer to her and started kissing her. He moved her to the bed and pushed her down.

"Luke we can't do this we need to go."

"Yes you can." He continued to kiss her and he started to lift her shirt up.

Meredith slapped his hands away and stood up trying to head to the door. "No Luke."

Luke stood and ran ahead of her and stood in front of the door. "We have been together for almost a year now and I have not had sex with you. You have given it to almost every guy in school and now it's my turn." He grabbed her and forced her away from the door.

Meredith started to cry realizing what he was trying to do. "No Luke I haven't. Please don't do this."

Luke took off his shirt and Meredith took that second to try again to get away from him. He grabbed her and hit her. She tried again and she got to the door. He grabbed her and turned her around, this time he hit her hard against the door. Meredith felt like she was going to pass out but she kept fighting. She cried harder hoping he would stop. She knew he usually stopped when she cried but he wasn't stopping. He pulled her up off the floor and threw her on the bed. He had punched her a few more times and Meredith could feel the blood falling from what she figured was a cut on her forehead and she could taste blood from another cut on her mouth. After he punched her again he ripped open her shirt and started kissing her chest. When she felt his hands on her skin she cried harder and continued to tell him no. He punched her again and pulled off her skirt and underwear. She tried to scream again. He put his hands around her throat as he entered her. She started to gasp for air as he continued to rape her. All she wanted to do was close her eyes and disappear.

"Christina have you seen Meredith? We want to get going."

"No Izzie last time I saw her Luke was taking her upstairs, he said something about his present."

"Well let's go find her. I haven't seen her tonight and we need to get going soon. Alex are you coming?"

"No, I'll check upstairs, I need to use the bathroom anyway. I'll meet you guys back down here in a few minutes." Alex said as he headed upstairs.

"Ok so what are we going to do?"

"Well George I'm going to wait right here for Alex and Meredith. I haven't seen her come back down those stairs since they went up there so I know Alex will find her. Izzie do you have a problem with that?"

Izzie, George, and Christina all looked at each other and agreed to wait for Alex to bring Meredith down.

Alex went upstairs and saw a group of guys huddled around a door. He recognized one of the guys. "Hey Mike what's going on?"

"Oh man, Luke is in with Meredith. He said he was going to get his birthday present."

Just then the door opened and Luke walked out with only his pants on. Alex looked at him and saw scratches on his face and chest. "What happened?"

Luke smiled. "I just got the best present ever man." With that he walked away with the other guys all following shooting off question after question.

Alex wanted to punch him but quickly realized that Meredith wasn't with him. He pushed the door open and noticed someone laying on the bed and he immediately felt his stomach turn. He slowly walked in and heard whimpers coming from the bed. When he got close enough he realized it was Meredith. "That bastard." He ran the rest of the way in the room and saw her laying there bleeding and naked. He quickly wrapped her in the comforter that she was laying on and he took out his phone and called Izzie. "Izzie."

"Alex is that you?"

"Izzie listen to me."

Izzie knew right away that something was wrong. "What is it Alex your scaring me."

"Are Christina and George with you?"

"Yes."

"Good. I need you to have Christina get the car and meet me outside."

"Alex what is it?"

Alex took a deep breath. "It's Meredith, she's been hurt and we need to get her to the hospital." He didn't hear anything on the other end. "Izzie did you hear me?"

"Yes ok, we'll be outside." Izzie hung up the phone and told Christina and George what Alex had said. They quickly ran outside. Christina and George headed out and got their cars. They brought them to the front of the house and waited for Alex and Meredith.

When Alex hung up he went to pick up Meredith. Meredith felt someone and started to fight again. "No please don't do this."

Alex was furious but he knew he needed to help his friend right now so he took a breath and leaned down to her ear. "Sshh Mer it's me Alex. I'm not going to hurt you. I need to take you to the hospital. You've been hurt and I just want to help you. Ok?"

Meredith heard him and nodded. "Please don't take me to Seattle Grace." That's when she finally passed out.

Alex didn't say anything he just picked her up and headed down stairs. He saw everyone looking at him and her but he didn't care. All he cared about was getting her to the hospital. When he got outside he saw the two cars waiting for him with Christina, Izzie, and George standing by them.

All three approached him. "Alex what happened."

"Luke raped her, we need to get her to the hospital. Christina you drive. Izzie go with George."

"I'll come with you."

"Izzie, you can't help her right now. Go with George, Christina let's go."

George and Izzie got in his car and Christina closed the back door after Alex got in the back seat with Meredith. She then got in the driver's seat and drove away.

"She doesn't want to go to Seattle Grace."

Christina looked at Alex n the rear view mirror. "I don't really care what she wants right now. Seattle Grace is the closest hospital so that is where we are going." She saw Alex nod. "What happened?"

"I saw a bunch of guys waiting outside a bedroom door. When I approached them I saw Mike and asked him what was going on. He told me Luke was getting his birthday present and then Luke came out with only his pants on. He had scratches on his face and chest. They all followed him away and when I went into the room I found Meredith."

The rest of the ride was quiet. When they got to the hospital Christina parked close to the emergency room and George parked next to her. They all got out and headed to the emergency doors.

"Help, someone I need help here." Alex shouted running in through the doors.

A nurse ran up to him and looked at Meredith. "What happened?"

"We were at a party and she was …she was attacked."

"Ok bring her in here." The nurse pointed to an exam room. Alex followed her in and gently laid her down on the bed. "You all need to wait outside. I'll get a doctor in here and get a gown on her. Oh this poor child"

Alex nodded and pushed the others out of the room.

"What are you doing, I want to be in there with her."

"Christina you heard the nurse you can't be in there."

"No!" Christina raised her voice. "I am her person and she needs me right now. I am not just going to sit out here."

Derek, Mark, and Addison had gone to get coffee during their break. They were walking back to the pit when they heard someone yelling. Derek looked and saw a girl with wild hair was the one doing the yelling. They got closer to her and something about her seemed familiar. "Christina?"

Christina turned around at the sound of her name. "Mcdreamy?"

Derek noticed the look on her face and looked at the other 3 that were standing close by. He felt his heart sink. "Where is Alex?"

"I'm right here. Who are you?" Alex stepped forward.

Christina knew there was no reason to keep lying especially if Mcdreamy was going to be the one to help her friend. "Mcdreamy this is Alex, Izzie, and George. We all are friends." She saw the questioning look on his face so she continued. "Her name is not Alex. It's Meredith, Meredith Grey. She doesn't use her real name here because of her mother."

"I knew she was lying to me. Where is she Christina?"

Christina didn't have a chance to answer because the nurse came out of the exam room. "Doctors."

The three that were standing there all looked to her and then to the four friends standing in front of them. Mark stepped forward. "What have we got?"

"17 year old rape victim."

"18 year old." Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George all said.

As soon as they heard the response Derek ran into the room with Mark and Addison following behind. Addison stopped at the door when she felt someone behind her. She turned to find Christina. "You need to wait out here. I'll let you know after we have had a chance to examine her." She saw the look on Christina's face. "We'll take care of her I promise." At that Christina backed up and Addison closed the door and approached the bed. "Derek you should wait outside."

"I'm not leaving her. Meredith can you hear me?"

Addison looked at Mark and then looked to the nurse. "Can you get a rape kit please?" Addison watched as the nurse nodded and left the room.

"Meredith, can you open your eyes? We just want to make sure you are ok."

Meredith heard talking and could feel the bright lights so she knew she was in the hospital. She slowly opened her eyes and saw someone standing close to her. "No please leave me alone, stop."

Derek was taken back he didn't expect her to react that way. Both him and Mark stepped back as Addison took Derek's place by Meredith.

"Meredith it's me Addison do you remember me?" Meredith nodded. "Good now I want you to calm down. You are in the hospital. Do you remember what happened?" Again Meredith nodded. "That's good. I know it's hard honey but I need you to tell me what happened ok?" There was no response. "Meredith who hurt you?"

"Christina, Alex where are my friends?"

"They are waiting outside Meredith. They brought you here tonight and let us know you were raped. I need you to tell me what happened."

"I need to get home." Meredith said as she tried to get up.

Addison quickly pushed her back down and saw Meredith flinch. "I'm sorry I hurt you Meredith but you are pretty banged up. You can't go anywhere until we have finished your examination."

"That's not necessary. I just want to go home." Meredith raised her voice. "Christina, Alex, Izzie, George."

Upon hearing their names the four came into the room and approached Meredith. "Meredith it's ok. I'm sorry we didn't take you to Mercy but Seattle Grace was closer and I was worried so you are just going to have to deal ok?"

Meredith smiled. "It's ok Christina. I just need you to take me home now."

"You can't go home until we finish your exam."

"There's no need for an exam Addison. I'm fine I just need to get home and get cleaned up."

"You're avoiding." Alex said from the other side of Meredith.

"Alex. I'm not avoiding I just want to go home."

In the light now Meredith's bruises were easy to see along with the cut lip she had and the cut on her forehead. This made Alex even more mad. "Is this the first time Meredith?"

Meredith looked away. While everyone else in the room looked at Alex.

"Is it Meredith?"

"Alex what are you doing?" Christina asked.

"No Christina she wants to just forget about this and act like nothing happened. She has been doing this for years. Whenever something bad happens or she gets hurt she just shuts down and doesn't talk. I'm sick of watching her hurt." He looked back to Meredith. "Now tell me is this the first time he has hurt you?"

"He didn't hurt me Alex, he loves me. Let's just go ok?"

"Meredith Grey?"

Meredith saw the look in his eyes and new Alex wasn't going to let this go so she gave in. "This is the first time and he was drunk. Ok is that what you wanted to hear? Now let's go."

Derek stepped forward. "What about your wrist?"

Mark followed, "And the bruises on your arms?"

She didn't answer so Alex pushed again. "Answer them."

"What bruises and you said you tripped over your clothes." Christina said.

Meredith had tears in her eyes. "He…it was an accident. He wanted to be with me and I pushed him away. It was just a disagreement that's all. Look I need to go. Luke is probably worried so…"

"You are not getting out of that bed. Alex tell them what happened."

"Nothing happened Christina. Luke and I were finally together, it was his birthday present. Like he said I have been with everyone else in school and it was his turn that's it."

"You said the rumors were lies and that you were a virgin."

"I lied."

"You're a bad liar and you know it. You also know that what happened with Luke was not something you wanted to happen because if it was you wouldn't look like you do right now and we wouldn't be in this hospital room."

"It's fine. I was drunk and so was he."

"You weren't drunk Meredith you stopped drinking when I did remember."

Meredith looked away.

Alex put his hand on her shoulder. "Meredith I was there when he came out of the room. If I hadn't have needed to get you to the hospital, I would have killed him. He hurt you and I'm sorry for that but I'm not going to let you avoid that or ignore and pretend it didn't happen or run from that or do whatever it is that you want to do to deal with it. This time you are going to deal with this straight on with us here to help you. Now I am going to go call the police and you are going to let Mcdreamy or whatever his name is and the other two doctors finish their exam understood?"

"No police Alex please just leave it."

"I'm sorry Mer. I couldn't stop him from doing this to you but I will stop him from doing this to someone else." Alex bent down and gave her a kiss on her forehead and then he followed George, Izzie, and Christina out of the room.

Meredith heard the door close and then closed her eyes for a second. When she opened them back up she spoke. "Addison?"

Addison stepped forward. "Yes Meredith."

"Can we please get this over with?"

Addison nodded and looked to the other two standing in the room. She nodded to them. "Ok."

Derek and Mark checked her over and Derek held her hand as Mark stitched up her cuts. When he finished Addison knew she had to finished the exam for the rape kit. "Ok Meredith I'm going to have Mark and Derek leave now so I can finish your exam ok?"

Meredith thought for a second knowing what was left. She didn't want to let go of Derek because she felt safe with him. She squeezed Derek's hand. "No it's ok just please get it over with."

Addison nodded and got everything ready while Mark helped her. They looked back and saw Derek still holding her hand and stroking Meredith's hair. Addison approached the bed and put Meredith's legs into the stirrups. She took her spot on the stool and started to explain to Meredith what she was going to do.

"Please don't Addison don't tell me, just do it."

Addison nodded and started.

Meredith closed her eyes as she felt what Addison was doing. She turned her head towards Derek who had gotten as close as he could to her. He continued to stroke her hair as she was letting the tears fall from her eyes. He whispered in her ear telling her it was ok and that he was there but it didn't stop the tears.

Addison finished and then told Meredith they were going to keep her overnight just to make sure everything was ok. Meredith just wanted to get cleaned up. "Ok Meredith once we get you in a room I'll help you get cleaned up."

"I can do it Addison."

"I know you can but I'm still going to help."

The nurse came in and told them they had a room. Derek let go of her hand so they could wheel her away but he promised he would check on her again. After he made his promise the nurse took her away.

Derek, Mark, and Addison all stepped out into the hall where they were met by Meredith's friends.

"Is she ok?"

Mark was the one who spoke this time. "She should be ok. We are going to keep her for the night for observation. She has some bruises and she will be sore for a little bit but she should be fine." He looked to Alex. "Did you call the police?"

"Yes, they came by. They said they would go pick him up."

"Did you call her parents?"

Christina looked at Addison. "Her mother is probably on call so she will find out and her father left when she was five. He hasn't been around since. Can we see her before we leave?"

"I think it would be best for you guys to come back in the morning. She should be getting settled in her room and then I am going to help her get cleaned up. After that she just needs to rest."

The four friends knew she was right so they agreed to leave. As they were heading to the door Derek, Mark, and Addison headed to Meredith's room.

_Thank-you again for your reviews (gt4good, DrMcLovely, TVHollywood Diva, ChristineThePirateQueen, Save-A-Scalpel-Ride-McSteamy, Bea14,-emiilyYx3, Zappy92, McLoving Grey's, f4fan90, Afw, yasmine 2388) keep them coming and I'll keep writing as long as you want me to. And since you took the time to review I made sure to take the time to finish this chapter. Thank-you agian and I hope you all continue to enjoy the story!_


	4. Chapter 4

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 4

Meredith was in her room waiting. The nurse had left and all she wanted was to get cleaned up. She decided she had waited enough so she tried to get up. When she first moved she realized how sore she was. Her need to get cleaned up was stronger than the pain she felt so she tried again. This time she made it to a sitting position. She smiled to her herself and realized she could do this without help so she got off the bed. At first her legs were a little wobbly but it only took a couple seconds before she felt ok to take a step towards the bathroom. She started to the end of the bed when the door opened.

"What do you think you are doing?"

"I'm going to get cleaned up and I was tired of waiting thank-you." Meredith answered Derek annoyed as she took a few more steps to get to the end of the bed.

Derek looked at Mark and Addison after hearing Meredith's response. Both of them had smiles which he figured matched his. He turned back to Meredith. "Point taken you're impatient but we are here and Addison said she would help you."

"I'm managing on my own."

"Christina was right you are a bad liar." Meredith shot him a glare which only made Derek smile again and he walked up next to her. "Just Mark and I help you to the bathroom and Addison can help you from there."

Meredith looked into his eyes and melted. She hated the way he made her feel and that made her upset but she did want to get cleaned up so she gave in. "Fine."

Derek looked to Mark who then approached Meredith. Derek was on her right and Mark on her left. They both helped her into the bathroom.

"Thank-you I can take it from here guys." Addison said from the doorway.

Derek and Mark both left as Addison entered and closed the door behind her. Derek took a spot on her bed while Mark took a chair that was sitting by the window.

"I can't believe she got a room with a shower."

"Well Mark I guess having Dr. Grey as your mother does have one advantage."

"Should we page her?"

"I'm sure the nurse did already. Besides I don't think Meredith is in too much of a hurry to see her."

Addison helped Meredith wash her hair and get cleaned up. Then she helped her put on some sweats that she had in her locker. "I knew they would be fine."

"Thanks Addison I really appreciate this. I'll call Christina and have her bring some clothes for me in the morning."Addison continued to brush through Meredith's hair. "Can I really go home tomorrow?"

"As long as nothing happens during the night. Meredith I want you to know that if you ever want to talk you can talk to me."

Meredith nodded. "I'm fine Addison."

"For the record I agree with Christina and Derek, you really can't lie."

Meredith smiled. "That's not really fair you know. You and Derek haven't known me for very long."

"You have a point but I trust Derek's instincts."

"So what is his story?"

"He's single."

"Addison that's not what I was asking."

Addison smiled. "You didn't have to. I guess you probably don't want to know this right now but he has fallen for you."

"He doesn't know me."

"Don't you believe in love at first sight?"

"I…I don't know what love is."

Addison's smile faded. "He has been talking about you for the last 8 weeks. I know he doesn't know you but he is a good guy so when you're ready give him a chance. And I'm not just saying that because he's one of my friends." Meredith smiled. "He was really worried about you the day he found those bruises on your arms."

"You know about those?"

"Both Mark and Derek told me. They were both worried about you. And to tell you the true Meredith I was worried when I left your house today also. I wish I wouldn't have left."

"Addison this isn't your fault, I got myself into this. I am grateful you were here tonight." Meredith said with a yawn.

Addison saw the yawn. "Alright enough of the talking, you need to get some rest. I'm going to get those two muscles out there to help you back to bed."

"Muscles?"

"Don't tell them I said that, it will go to their heads." Meredith laughed as Addison opened the door and motioned to Derek and Mark.

Derek and Mark came into the bathroom and saw Meredith laughing. "What's so funny?"

"Addison was just…"

"Meredith!"

"Nothing."

"Well I don't care what it is just as long as you keep that smile on your face." Derek said. He could see her cheeks blush which made him smile even more as Mark and him helped her back to her bed.

Once Meredith was in bed Derek sat at the end of her bed while Mark took his spot back in the chair and Addison was standing next to Mark. Meredith looked at the three of them. "Don't you guys have to work?"

"We're on call and there aren't any traumas right now so I guess you're stuck with us."

"Don't you mean you are stuck with me Mark?"

Mark was about to say something when the door opened. "What are you all doing in here?"

Derek and Mark both stood up next to Meredith's bed with Addison right beside them. "Dr. Grey we were just checking on our patient." Addison quickly answered the question. She glanced at Meredith who had sunk down in the bed and her smile was now completely gone.

"Is she surgical?"

"No Dr. Grey."

She took a step further into the room so she was standing by Meredith's bed and she looked right at her. "What did you do now?"

"Nothing mom I was just…Luke he…I…"

"Spit it out Meredith what did you do? And what does this have to do with Luke?"

"She was assaulted Dr. Grey."

She looked at Addison and then back to Meredith. "What?"

"Luke he attacked me tonight at the party."

"Were you drinking?"

"Yes."

"So you let him have his way with you just like you have every other boy?"

Derek, Mark, and Addison didn't know what to say or do. They couldn't believe she was saying these things. How could she not see the cuts and the bruises? And she didn't even ask if she was ok. Addison couldn't take it anymore. "I did the rape kit Dr. Grey."

"That wasn't necessary Dr. Montgomery." Dr. Grey said and then she turned back to Meredith. "All my friends have told me about what their children say about you Meredith. How could you do something like this to Luke. He treated you well and now you have probably ruined his life because you let the sex get a little rough."

"It wasn't…"

"I don't want to hear it Meredith. You are an embarrassment to me and now everyone in this hospital is going to know how you are. I should have sent you to boarding school as soon as your father left."

"Why didn't you?"

"What?"

"Why didn't you send me away or let me go with him?"

"You really think he would have wanted you? You're the reason he left. If we hadn't have had you then he would still be with me. Don't act like you know…"

"Ellis!"

Dr. Grey turned around. "Richard, what are you doing here?"

"I heard Meredith was here and I wanted to check on her." Richard said as he stepped around Ellis and approached Meredith's bed. "Meredith?"

"Hello Richard you didn't have to come I know you're busy."

"I can make time for you Meredith." His pager went off and he looked down at it. "I'm sorry I have to go but I want you to call me if you need anything." Richard gave Meredith a kiss on her head and walked out.

As soon as Richard left Dr. Grey started again. "You will do anything for attention won't you? You even pulled Richard away from his patients." Her pager went off but before she left she addressed the three doctors still in the room. "Get to your patients before I talk to your resident and one of you better discharge her first thing in the morning, if she's not surgical we need the bed." Dr. Grey stormed out of the room.

Derek, Mark, and Addison were still standing next to Meredith's bed when Dr. Grey left Mark decided to break the silence. "How do you know Dr. Webber?"

"He's been a good friend of my mom's since before I was born. They went to medical school together. You know you guys better go before she makes good on her threat."

The three looked a little longer at Meredith who was almost laying down in the bed with her head down. "We can stay a little longer."

"I'm fine and I'm tired so if you don't mind…"

"Meredith?"

"I'm fine. Goodnight." Meredith said as she scooted down and turned over in the bed so she was facing away from them. She then pulled the blanket up around her shoulders and closed her eyes.

The three shared a look and headed to the door. Just before they got there Derek turned back to her. "I'll leave now Meredith but I promise I will be back later to check on you."

When Meredith heard the door close she let a few tears fall before falling into a fitful sleep.

Derek, Mark, and Addison went back to the pit in silence. Neither of them knew what to say. There weren't any traumas so they decided to try and get some sleep. They headed to the on call rooms. "I'll see you guys later."

"Where are you going Derek?"

"Addi you shouldn't have to ask. He told her he would be back."

"That's right and I intend to keep that promise."

"Derek don't push her. I don't think she's ready to talk yet."

"Don't worry Addi I won't." Derek took off in the other direction while Addison and Mark kept walking down the hall.

Derek stepped into Meredith's room and noticed she was sleeping. He quietly walked to the chair Mark had been sitting in earlier and took a seat. After a few minutes of watching her sleep he drifted to sleep.

Derek awoke to muffled cries. He remembered where he was and looked at the bed in front of him. He saw Meredith tossing and turning so he stood and approached her. He saw she had tears coming down her cheeks. He saw she wasn't calming so he gently shook her awake.

Meredith opened her eyes and saw Derek standing by her. She quickly wiped her tears. "You came back."

"I said I would. I always keep my promises."

"I'm sorry about what happened earlier."

"What do you have to be sorry for?"

"Well my mom, she...she's…she's a good doctor."

"That she is."

"Yes she is." Meredith said. She didn't know what it was about him but she felt comfortable with him.

Derek smiled. "You should try and get some more rest."

"I think I'd rather talk unless you have somewhere to be."

"Not unless I get paged. What do you want to talk about?"

Meredith and Derek spent the next 3 hours talking anything and everything that came to mind staying away from any serious topics. Finally Meredith drifted back to sleep and Derek was able to get some sleep.

The next morning Meredith woke up and found Derek asleep in the chair. She smiled knowing he would probably have a sore neck. Derek's pager went off and she laughed seeing him almost fall out of the chair.

"I'm glad I'm so entertaining to you." Derek said half asleep.

Meredith looked at him in shock but she saw the smile on his lips. "You're not that entertaining. Now if you had actually hit the floor that would have been entertaining."

"Oh so you're one of those people who laughs at other peoples pain?"

"Dr. Sheppard, I assure you I would have asked if you were all right before I started laughing." Meredith said with another laugh.

Derek was about to reply when Addison came in. "I'm glad to see you are enjoying your stay Meredith."

"Not really just the um…entertainment." Meredith replied with another laugh as Derek's pager went off again. "You better get that."

Derek tried to act hurt but failed when he realized how beautiful she looked with a smile on her face. "I'll be back to say goodbye before you are discharged." Derek replied as he gave her a quick kiss on the head and left the room.

"Good morning Addison."

"So how are you really?"

"I'm good. I got some sleep and Derek and I talked a lot last night."

"I guess that's good."

"He isn't like other guys Addison. I feel comfortable with him."

"He's a good guy. Do you have feelings for him?"

"Addison I feel something I just don't know what it is right now. I just…I'm not ready for anything. I don't know if I'll ever be ready."

"You will it's just going to take some time. Listen I know Derek, he's not someone who will hurt you but I know you have to be ready before you start anything. Just take your time and make sure it's what you want ok?"

"Ok."

"So about your mom…"

Meredith cut her off. "I don't want to talk about it I'm fine. Besides like I said I talked with Derek last night."

"Meredith…remember you're a bad liar? Derek isn't the type to push or make you talk about something that you are not comfortable with talking about yet. If he's still the guy I know him to be he would have tried to take your mind off of what happened and the only way for him to do that is to get to know you better."

Meredith smiled. "You do know him well don't you?"

"So I was right." Meredith nodded. "Well I'm not like him. I want you to talk about this, about everything that happened yesterday."

"Addison, I said I'm fine."

Addison's pager went off. "Saved by the bell."

"I know what you're trying to do and I appreciate it but it's not necessary. Hey when can I leave?"

"I'll discharge you when your friends get here. I want you to rest for another couple days so no school until Tuesday, Wednesday would be better."

"Tuesday, got it. Thank-you Addison."

Addison went to leave but turned back to Meredith and handed her a piece of paper.

"What's this?"

"It's my address and phone number." Addison saw Meredith was about to say something so she held up her hand and then continued. "I know you're fine but just humor me. It's just in case you need it so please keep it."

Meredith nodded and Addison left the room.

2 hours later Derek and Mark came in. They sat and talked for another hour before Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George came in. An hour later Addison came in and discharged Meredith. Derek, Mark, and Addison had come back in and said their goodbyes to Meredith before the nurse wheeled her out with her friends following behind. Derek, Mark, and Addison all went back to work.

_Ok so that was chapter 4 I hope I didn't disappoint anyone. The interaction between Meredith and her mother was hard for me to write so I hope it didn't ruin the chapter but I wanted to give a look into their relationship. Anyway's thank-you again for all the reviews (Mingleberry, TVHollywood Diva, Bea14, f4fan90, GALover, -eMiiLYx3, ChristineThePirateQueen, Mrs.Dr.DerekShephard, gt4good, McLoving Grey's, Zappy92). Please let me know what you think...Thank-you!_


	5. Chapter 5

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 5

Addison was sitting on the couch watching TV. She was lucky enough to have the night off while Derek and Mark were on call. She had planned to get caught up on all the celebrity gossip before going to bed and getting a goodnights sleep. She leaned forward to pick the phone that was ringing off the coffee table. She looked at the caller id and smiled. "Hello Mark."

"Hey babe how are you doing all by yourself?"

"I am doing just what I said I would be doing. I am watching TV and relaxing. You should be proud. I even have my feet up."

"I am proud."

"So any good cases I'm missing out on?"

"No. We are both just watching Webber and Grey's post op patients. It might be an easy night but we'll see."

"That's good." Addison heard the doorbell. "Oh Mark I have to go, I ordered take out and it's here." She got up and walked to her purse.

"Alright babe just be sure to keep my bed warm for when I get home."

"I will. Wake me when you get in ok?"

"Yeah sure Addi. Love you."

"Love you too. Goodbye." Addison hung up the phone and walked to the door. "I'm coming, that was really qui…quick."

"I'm sorry I didn't know where else to go. My mom kicked me out and Christina wasn't home. I would go to Izzie but she lives with her mom in a small apartment so I know there won't be room and Alex has other things to worry about and George has two brothers with no other rooms so I don't think he has room and I don't want to be a burden. I won't be a burden to you I can sleep on the floor and I'll be out in the morning." Meredith finished and took a deep breath before she started again. "I'm sorry, I know you…"

"Meredith! You're rambling." Addison got her attention. "Come in." She stepped to the side.

Meredith walked in and Addison closed the door. "Thank-you."

"Don't mention it Meredith. I told you if you needed me you could come. Go ahead and put your bag down." Addison motioned to the couch. "Let's go sit down."

Meredith set down her bag and followed Addison to the couch. "I just didn't have anywhere else to go. My mom…I just didn't know where else to go."

"Meredith what happened?"

"My mom and I had another fight. You know I only have 2 more months of school left? I got my acceptance letter for college. I thought she would be happy. I tried to make dinner for her." Meredith chuckled. "I should have known better. I burnt pretty much everything and that started it. She started saying how I wasn't good at anything, that everything I touch turns to garbage. I got my acceptance letter and gave it to her. She asked me what I wanted to go to school for, when I told her I wanted to be a surgeon she laughed in my face saying I would never make it. She said I didn't have what it takes. I went upstairs and went to bed. I had a nightmare and I woke her up. She told me to leave. So I left. I think she has some long shifts this week so she should cool down and I can sneak back in tomorrow. It's just 2 more months like I said so If I can just use the couch tonight I would really appreciate it Addison." Meredith finished, she didn't want to tell her about the rest of the argument where her mother had brought up Luke.

Addison had listened to everything Meredith said. She watched her and knew there was more to the story but she wasn't about to push. She saw the hurt on her face and didn't want to cause anymore hurt. "You can stay in Derek's room."

Meredith's eyes went wide. "Derek's room?"

Addison smiled. "Yes Derek, Mark, and I all live here. Mark and I share a room and Derek has his own."

"You and Mark."

"Yes. He's not that bad once you get to know him. He's just full of himself."

Meredith smiled and then her expression changed. "Are they coming home tonight?"

"No. They are on call until tomorrow morning. Don't worry I know they won't mind." The doorbell rang. "That must be dinner. Are you hungry?" Meredith nodded. "I'll be right back." Addison got up and paid for dinner.

Meredith and Addison ate and watched TV. They talked some more and got to know each other even better than they did in the hospital.

Addison was surprised by how grown up Meredith was. She knew she was 18 but most 18 year olds that Addison knew didn't have a head on their shoulders like Meredith. It saddened her because she knew part of the reason for this was due to a mother and father who didn't seem to care about their daughter and then she thought about what Meredith had to go through less than a week ago. She realized the bruises were almost gone but she could only imagine what emotional demons Meredith was dealing with. That scarred her knowing that if someone wasn't there for her Meredith couldn't really move on from what happened. Her thoughts were interrupted by Meredith.

"Addison?"

"Yes."

"Do you mind if I take a shower and get ready for bed?"

"Of course not. Go ahead."

Meredith got up, grabbed her bag and went into the bathroom. When she closed the door she sighed. She couldn't believe how nice Addison was being. She didn't know why it wasn't like her mother would even care where she was so it's not like Addison would get brownie points with Dr. Ellis Grey. She pushed the thought from her mind. Addison had never said anything about her mother so she wasn't going to think that way. She liked Addison. She was smart, funny, pretty. She felt like an older sister. Meredith took off her clothes and got into the shower. As soon as she felt the water on her skin she started scrubbing.

Addison looked at the clock. It was 10:30pm. She still heard the shower and then realized that Meredith had been in the bathroom for the last 30 minutes. She got up and went to the door. "Meredith?" There was no answer. So she knocked and tried again. "Meredith are you ok in there?" Still no answer. She turned the knob and found that it was unlocked so she opened the door and tried again. "Meredith are you ok in here?"

Meredith was still scrubbing when she heard Addison. She turned and saw her standing at the door. "I'm sorry Addison, I'll be out in a couple minutes."

"OK." Addison went back to the couch and head the shower shut off.

After a few minutes Meredith came out of the bathroom in her pajamas. "I'm sorry I guess I lost track of time."

"Are you ok?"

"I'm fine Addison. Thank-you."

"Are you sure, you were in there for quite awhile."

Meredith nodded. "I'm fine really." She smiled hoping Addison would believe her. "I'm going to go to bed. Which room can I sleep in?"

Addison wasn't sure if she believed her or not but she realized it wasn't the right time to push her so she decided to let it go. She got up and motioned for Meredith to follow her. "Alright I'll show you Derek's room. Then I think I will turn in too." Addison walked down the hall with Meredith following. She stopped at the door across from the bathroom and looked over her shoulder. " This is the office. It's really more for storage than anything because it's full of boxes." She continued a few more steps to the end of the hall. "Here you go this is Derek's room." She pointed to the right and then to the left. "And this is mine and Marks room. If you need anything let me know ok?"

"Thank-you Addison I really…I really appreciate this."

Addison placed her hand on Meredith's shoulder. "You're welcome Meredith and if you want to talk you know where to find me ok?"

Meredith nodded and said goodnight. She entered the room and took in everything that was there. She figured it was a typical single guys room which made her smile. She put her bag down on the right side of the bed. She climbed in and laid down. At first she felt strange laying in the bed of someone she barely knew. She expected to have another sleepless night. She rolled over in his bed and pulled the comforter up close to her. She took a deep breath and smiled. She could smell him but she wasn't scarred. She let a tear fall from her eye as she closed her eyes and fell into a deep sleep.

Addison said goodnight back and went to lock up and turn the TV off. She went into the bathroom and got ready for bed herself. When she entered her room she collapsed on the bed and was a sleep before she knew it.

"I can't believe she just sent us home."

"I know she must have had a bad night. I'm not going to complain about it are you Derek?"

"Are you kidding me? This means we can get what 5 more hours of sleep."

Mark smiled as he looked at his watch too. "12:30am this almost feels like a Christmas present or something. I can't wait to surprise Addison."

Derek and Mark were stepping off the elevator. "Just keep it down so I can sleep ok?"

Mark smiled as he unlocked the door and walked in with Derek following. "I'm not making any promises Derek." Mark put his keys on the counter and took his coat off.

Derek followed after he locked up. He made his way to his room and entered quietly not wanting to wake Addison. He put his wallet on his dresser and quickly undressed down to his boxers. He walked around to the right side of the bed and took a step to get closer when he tripped. He fell onto the bed but realized something was different.

Mark nodded as he made his way to his room and entered quietly. He quickly got undressed and crawled into bed. He wrapped his arms around Addison. She turned into him and he gave her a quick kiss.

"What time is it?"

"About 12:45am I guess."

"You're home early?"

"I know. Dr. Grey came back to the hospital and sent us both home. She said she wanted to watch over her own patients tonight."

Addison pulled out of Mark's arms and quickly got out of bed. "We…Is Derek home with you?" Just as she finished the question she heard a scream. "Oh no!" She headed to the door with Mark following.

"What was that?"

"NO DON'T, LEAVE ME ALONE!"

"What the…" Derek jumped up and quickly turned the lamp on. Just as he saw who was screaming at him his door burst open.

"Derek Meredith is…"

"PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE DON'T HURT ME!" She had tears running down her cheeks now.

Derek, Addison, and Mark stood looking at her. Addison finally recovered and went to the bed. She sat down in front of Meredith and grabbed her hands. "Meredith! Meredith it's Addison, you're ok look at me." She could feel her trembling. "Meredith it's ok. You're at my apartment remember? Your safe this was just a misunderstanding." Addison squeezed Meredith's hands.

Meredith realized where she was. Her eyes focused on Addison. After a second her eyes went past Addison's shoulder to Mark who was standing in boxers looking at her she felt embarrassed and turned her head to the right. That's when she saw Derek standing with his boxers also staring at her. She felt Addison squeeze her hands again.

"Meredith I'm sorry. Derek and Mark are home early tonight and I didn't leave a note." She could still feel her trembling.

"It's…I'm fine…it's ok." She said quickly. "I just…I'll go…I should go. I'm sorry Derek, Mark" Meredith quickly got up and grabbed her bag and ran to the bathroom where she started getting dressed.

Addison jumped up to follow her. "No Meredith you don't have to go. This was just a misunderstanding."

"It's ok, don't worry about me I'll be out in just a few minutes." Meredith looked at herself in the mirror. She had tears rolling down her cheeks. That's when she remembered her mother's words. 'Crying shows weakness, I didn't raise you to be weak.' She quickly washed her face and started to get dressed.

Addison went back to Derek's room where she found both Mark and Derek just inside the door talking. They stopped talking when she entered and both looked to her with questioning faces. "She said she had a fight with her mother. She didn't have anywhere else to go. I told her she could stay."

"How did she know where you were?"

"I gave her my address the day she left the hospital. I wanted her to know she could count on me if she needed someone." She looked at their faces. "Don't look at me like that. You saw how her mother treated her. She said she thinks her mother has some long shifts so she can sneak back in tomorrow." Addison had a tear roll down her cheek. "Who has to sneak into their own house to live?"

Derek sank down to the bed. Mark took a step forward and wrapped Addison in a hug. "Sshhh. It's ok." He looked back at Derek who nodded. "She can stay Addison. You did the right thing."

Addison stepped back as Derek spoke. "She was trembling."

Addison nodded. "I don't think she has come to terms with what happened yet."

"She said she was fine."

Derek stood. "She's not fine. She says that about everything how can she be fine. Did you look at her?"

"Derek."

"Mark I can see it in her eyes. She is not fine."

"I agree with you Derek but how can we help her? We're just three interns we barely have time for our own lives how can we help a teenager?"

"Mark" Addison stepped out of the room as she heard the bathroom door opening.

Meredith had gotten dressed and picked up her bag. She knew she had to face them so she put on her smile, opened the door and stepped out. "Goodnight, thanks again Addison. I haven't slept that good in a while. I should get home." Her voice trembled as she said the last part so she kept walking down the hall trying to make it to the door.

"Meredith wait." Addison called as she quickly caught up to her. Mark and Derek were close behind her.

Meredith turned around making sure to keep her fake smile on her face.

"You don't have to go."

"I'll be fine. You guys should get some sleep. I'm sure my m…mother will be on your cases tomorrow so you need your rest." She turned and took a step.

Derek pushed past Addison and grabbed Meredith's wrist. "Please don't go Meredith."

Meredith felt his hand on hers. It sent shivers through her and she didn't know how to respond.

"Meredith you said your mom didn't want you there. You don't have anywhere to go."

Meredith's heart sank and she turned around. "It's ok Addison. I'm sure she's a sleep by now." She looked from Derek to Mark. "She probably went back to the hospital anyways so I should have the house to myself." Again she put a smile on her face and turned to leave.

Addison stepped around Derek and quickly passed Meredith where she stopped and crossed her arms over her chest. "Meredith Grey you are not going anywhere except back to that bed. It is late and I have to get up early tomorrow so I would appreciate it if this conversation was over." Addison finished and briefly looked over Meredith where she saw Mark and Derek trying to hide their smiles. She quickly looked away knowing if she looked at their smirks again she too would start to laugh which would lose her effectiveness.

Meredith looked at Addison and decided she didn't want to argue. She nodded. "Ok."

"Good now go put your pajamas back on and get in that bed. I'll be there in a minute."

"I can sleep on the couch, it's Derek's bed."

"No you will not now go." Addison said pointing down the hall.

Meredith turned and went into the bathroom. As soon as she was gone Derek and Mark let out their laughter. They each covered their mouths not wanting Meredith to hear. Addison walked up to them and hit them each on the chest.

"Ouch. What was that for?"

"For laughing at me."

"Addi, I've never seen you like that. It was kind of cute."

"Yeah babe cute, sexy even." Mark said stepping up to her and trying to hug her.

Addison stepped out of his grasp. "Not so fast Mark. I am going to get that girl back to sleep and then we are going to have talk."

Meredith came out of the bathroom and back up to the other three. "I really think it would be better if I sleep out here. That way Derek can sleep in…"

"No you don't. Let's go." Addison said putting her arm around Meredith's shoulder and walking back to Derek's room. When they entered the room Addison waited for Meredith to climb into bed.

"Why are you doing this?" Meredith asked as she was sitting on the bed. She had pulled the blanket up around her. As Addison sat down beside her.

Addison knew Mark and Derek would be listening in the hall. "Because I think you could use a break. You know you don't have to be strong all the time Meredith. I know you were scarred when Derek woke you. Just between you and me he wouldn't hurt a fly if he could help it."

Meredith smiled. "It wasn't him. I just…" Tears came to her eyes. "I'm fine." She said as she quickly wiped them away before they could fall.

"Why do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"You try to hide your feelings. It's ok to cry."

"No it's not. I cried when my dad left. She didn't have a tear in her eye when he walked out and never looked back. I looked up at her thinking she would try and comfort me. That's when she told me. She bent down to my level and pointed her figure at me when she said it. 'Crying shows weakness and I'm not raising you to be weak'. Ever since then I knew I couldn't cry." Meredith looked away. "It was just another way I disappoint her." Meredith finished with a yawn.

"Are you going to be ok in here? I know it's a messy room but to be honest my room isn't much cleaner" Meredith smiled which caused Addison to ask. "What?"

"I know it sounds funny but it smells like Derek in here."

"It is his room."

"Addison, I feel safe in here. When I first went to sleep it was the first time in a long time I just felt safe."

Addison let a tear escape her eye as she saw one fall from Meredith's. "You are safe Meredith. Now lay down and get some sleep."

Meredith laid down and pulled the blanket up around her. Addison had stood and was about to turn off the lamp. "Addison?"

"Yes."

"The arms over the chest and the face and the finger pointing out there, not very convincing. You really need to work on it before you have kids."

Addison smiled. "It worked on you didn't it?"

"I just didn't want to make you look funny in front of Derek and Mark."

Addison got a shocked look on her face. "Well it works on them."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously. Now go to sleep." Addison turned off the light and walked out of the room closing the door behind her. When she got to the hall she saw Mark and Derek with smiles on their faces. She pointed to the living room.

Addison, Mark, and Derek walked to the living room and sat on the couch.

"Rough night?"

"You could say that." Addison said as she laid her head on Marks shoulder. "So you both heard her?" Both Mark and Derek nodded. "We can't just let her go back to that women. I don't care how good of a doctor she is she's a terrible mother and she doesn't deserve a daughter like Meredith."

Mark looked over at Derek. "What are you thinking Addi?"

"She told me she got accepted to college. She only has 2 more months of school and I am guessing she will start college in the fall. I want to let her stay here until then."

Derek didn't say anything but he did smile. Mark saw the smile. "You know she is dark and twisty right?"

"Mark she just needs someone to show her the light."

"I do agree with her about the face, finger pointing, and arms over the chest thing." Derek chuckled and Mark turned his attention to his friend. "And Derek, show her the light, that was cheesy even for you."

Addison smiled. "I know you care for her Derek but you can't have a relationship with her until she deals with everything that has happened to her."

"Addi, how is it that you got her to open up to you?"

"She didn't open up Mark. We just talked a little. She feels like a little sister I never had. Maybe she feels that way also and it's just easier for us to talk. Besides I think she has a ways to go but I want to be here for her to help her anyway I can."

"We will to Addi. I'm not going to let her get away so easily this time."

Mark nodded in agreement. He had to admit he felt something for her too. He knew it wasn't what Derek felt but he defiantly wanted to help her anyway he could. "How about we get some sleep?"

"I'll go get some blankets for you Derek." Addison hopped off the couch and disappeared down the hall.

Mark looked to Derek. "Are you ok with this?"

"I just want her to be ok…really ok."

"What about sleeping on the couch for the next 5 months." Mark asked with a smile.

"Whatever she needs Mark. I'll do whatever she needs even if it means sleeping on the couch for the next 5 months."

Addison came back into the living room. "Who said he will be the only one sleeping on the couch?"

Derek and Addison both shared a laugh at the look on Mark's face. Mark and Addison went in to bed and Derek laid down on the couch. He smiled because he was relieved to feel how comfortable it really was sleeping on it. Then he thought back to Meredith's words. 'It smells like Derek in here, I feel safe in here. When I first went to sleep it was the first time in a long time I just felt safe.' That's when he knew he would always love her and he would do whatever it took to protect her, keep her safe, and make her happy. He soon fell asleep with a smile on his lips knowing she was just down the hall.

The next morning Mark and Addison woke up and took turns in the bathroom. Addison went first and when she was done she looked in on Meredith who was still asleep. She then walked out to the living room and woke Derek. "Derek you better get up. Mark's almost ready and we can't be late."

Derek rolled over and fell off the couch. "Ouch."

Addison was laughing when Mark came up behind her. "What's so funny?"

"Derek fell off the couch."

Mark smiled. "You better hurry up or we're going to be late."

Derek got up and headed to the bathroom to get ready for work. Mark and Addison went to the kitchen and started coffee.

Meredith heard the shower as she slowly woke up and stretched. She wanted to take a shower but decided not to because she had taken one the night before. She got out of bed and quickly put on some clothes before heading to the kitchen. When she opened the door she was met by Derek's blue eyes. She smiled at him. "Good morning."

"Good morning to you to. I was hoping you would be up so I could get some clothes."

Meredith stepped aside. "Oh I'm sorry of course. I'm…I'm just going to go get some coffee."

Derek smiled. He thought it was so cute how she stuttered when she was nervous. He quickly got dressed and headed to the kitchen. When he entered he saw Mark and Addison each were eating a bowl of cereal with coffee and Meredith had a cup of coffee. He grabbed his cereal out of the cupboard and poured it into a bowl before sitting at the table and looking at Meredith. "Did you eat already?"

"I am, thank-you." She replied holding up her cup of coffee.

"Coffee is not breakfast. You need to eat something."

"I'm good."

"Derek thinks if you don't start the day with a good breakfast then you really aren't starting the day."

"Well Mark I guess you feel the same way because you and Addi have been starting the morning this way since we moved in together."

"How long have you guys lived together?"

"Derek and I have been living together for the last three years and Addison moved in about a year ago."

"Really?"

"Yeah, Mark and I have been friends for years."

"What about you Addison?"

"I've known them for years too. I just was the girl with cooties for many years before Mark finally came to his senses."

They all shared a laugh as they finished their coffee and breakfast. When they were done Addison looked to Meredith. "Meredith do you need a ride to school?"

"I can just call a cab."

"Don't you have a car?"

"Mark."

"It's ok. I don't drive. I never learned how to so…"

"No one taught you to drive?"

Meredith shook her head. "It's not a big deal. My friends have been great about it and if I need to I call a cab."

"You need to learn how to drive. Maybe Derek and I can teach you this summer before you go to school."

"Maybe. Do you mind if I use the phone for a minute?"

"Yes." Derek blurted out. Addison, Mark and Meredith all looked at him. "I mean no, you can't use the phone. I can give you a ride on my way to the hospital and then pick you up on my way back. I have a short shift today because I'm close to my 40 hours."

Meredith thought about it for a minute and then decided she wouldn't mind. "Ok. If it's really not too much trouble."

"Of course not let's go." Derek headed out the door with Meredith, Addison, and Mark following. They got out to their cars and said their goodbyes.

Meredith gave Derek direction to the school and they spent the ride joking with each other. She smiled realizing how happy she was to be around him. Derek pulled up in front of the school. "So what time do you get out?"

"3:00pm, you really don't have to pick me up I can get Alex or Christina to give me a ride."

"I know I don't have to but I'm going to so no arguing. I'll be here at 3pm. Have a good day." Derek smiled as she rolled her eyes and got out of the car.

When she got out she headed to her locker. As she was walking down the halls she heard people whispering. She got closer to her locker and saw Christina, Izzie, Alex, and George standing in front of her locker.

Christina stepped forward. "Hey Mer welcome back. How about you share my locker for a while?"

"Don't be crazy Christina you don't have enough room in there for my books and besides there is nothing wrong with mine."

Now Izzie stepped forward. "How about mine Mer? It's closer to your afternoon classes so you can..."

Meredith cut her off. "I am not sharing your locker Izzie." As she finished George and Alex were about to say something when she stopped them. "I am not sharing any of your lockers now get out of my way or you're going to make me late."

Her four friends stepped to the side and Meredith looked at her locker. Izzie put her hand on Meredith's shoulder. "It was like that when we came in. I went to the principle and he told the janitor to have it cleaned off by the end of the day. I'm sorry Mer."

Meredith shook her head and put a smile on her face. "Whatever it's fine. So what are you guys doing after school today?"

"Homework." Christina answered.

George replied with, "Homework I guess."

"Shopping and then Homework." Izzie said happily.

Alex muttered. "Detention."

"Alex you have detention. What did you do?"

"Nothing Mer."

Meredith noticed he was looking a little uncomfortable. "What happened Alex?"

"Just tell her Alex." Christina said.

"I got in a fight with Mike yesterday."

"Why?" There was no answer. "Why Alex?"

"Because he helped Luke."

"What?"

"He knew what Luke was planning that night and he didn't stop him. He deserved it."

"Alex."

"I'm not sorry. Luke is going to trial but Mike isn't. The DA gave him a deal as long as he testifies against Luke. I don't think it's right and I just let him know it."

"Alex, I wish you wouldn't have. But I understand why you did it and thank-you."

"So do you know when the trial will be?"

"They are going to start picking the jury tomorrow. They told me the actual trial should start Friday if there's no complications and I should have to testify next week after Alex and Mike." The bell rang. "Alright we better get to class. I'll see you guys at lunch right?" Meredith said as they all walked down the hall.

Lunch came and went and she was in her last class. She looked at the clock 2:30pm. All the sudden the door opened and in walked the vice principle who walked up to her teacher and whispered something in her ear. Her teacher looked at her and called her to the front of the room as the vice principle left the room. She was told the principle wanted to see her after school.

Derek had made it through his shift and was changing in the locker room when Mark and Addison came in. "Derek if her mom…just bring her back if you need to."

"Addison don't worry." Addison didn't say anything. "I'll bring her back. What time are you guys off?"

"I get off at 4:30pm and Addison gets off at 5:00pm. I was going to pick up a pizza on the way home and maybe a movie since we are all off tomorrow."

"That sounds good. I have to get Meredith at 3:00pm and then I was going to bring her back to our place to get her bag and take her home. I will see you guys later."

"Bye." Mark and Addison both said goodbye as Derek left the locker room.

Derek reached the school at 3:00pm. He was watching all the kids come out of the building and was surprised that Meredith wasn't one of them. Finally he spotted Izzie so and he walked up to her. "Where's Meredith?"

"Christina said the principle wanted to see her so she's either in his office or at her locker getting her stuff. She should be out soon."

"Thanks Izzie. Where is her locker?"

"It's down the main hall. She should be out soon though Dr. Sheppard just give her a few minutes."

Derek nodded and decided to wait by the door. He looked at his watch and saw it was 3:30pm. He looked up and saw Christina in the hall leaning up against some lockers so he decided to approach her. "Christina?"

Christina turned around. "Mcdreamy, what are you doing here?"

"I'm here to pick up Meredith isn't she done yet?" Derek asked as he took a few more steps closer to Christina. When he looked up at her again something caught his eye. "What the hell is that?"

"A locker."

"You know what I mean Christina. Is this Meredith's locker?" She didn't answer which he took as a yes. "Why the hell haven't they cleaned it off yet?"

"I don't know I guess the janitor has been busy today."

Derek was about to respond when he heard Meredith and both him and Christina turned to her.

"I'm sorry I'm late Derek. I'll just get my things." She stopped at her locker and started cleaning out her locker.

"What are you doing Mer?"

"I'm cleaning out my locker what does it look like Christina?"

"Why?"

"Well apparently it is in my best interest if I don't come back."

"What! What about graduation!"

"Calm down Christina. Mr. Spencer said I can take my finals right away and I can still graduate with you guys he just received some complaints about me from some of the parents and he thought it would be better for me not to come."

"What about your mother? They can't just kick you out of school without talking to your mother."

Meredith laughed. "My mother, yeah well he called her and she said she didn't have time to come in so he should just do what he feels is best for the school. I told him I would be back on Friday to take my finals and he said he would call me with my grades if there were any problems. Apparently they want me out right away."

"How can they do this?"

"Well when over half of the student bodies parents call and complain apparently they get results. Besides now I don't have to listen to all the whispers."

"Mer you shouldn't have to quite school and what whispers?"

"Christina you are almost as bad of a liar as I am. You heard them all day. I'm not thinking of this as getting kicked out of school, I'm just taking a well earned vacation." She finished with a smile as she closed her locker.

Derek hadn't said anything since she got there. He was still shocked at what was on her locker. He had heard the whole conversation between Meredith and Christina and he was taken back by her reaction. Yet again she was acting all strong when he could only imagine what she was hiding inside. She had just been asked to stop coming to school and yet again her mother had put her job before her own daughter. All he wanted to do was hold her in his arms and let her know he was there for her but he knew that's not what she wanted now so instead he decided it was time to go. "Are you ready Meredith?"

She nodded and they started walking to the parking lot as Christina spoke. "So where are you going Mer?"

"I'm going home. I'll give you a call later ok?" Meredith responded as Derek opened the car door for her and she got in.

"Alright I'll talk to you later." Derek closed the door and went to walk to the driver's side when Christina stopped him.

"Don't leave until you know she's ok."

"What?"

"You are taking her home right?" Derek nodded. "You don't know her mom that well, just make sure Meredith is ok before you leave her."

"I will I promise." Christina nodded and went to her car as Derek got in and started his. "Ok so we need to go back to my apartment first for your bag right?" Meredith nodded and he started driving to the apartment. "You want to talk?"

"I'm fine."

Derek cringed he was so sick of hearing her say that, he wished it wasn't a word. "Ok."

Meredith turned on the radio and they drove in silence until they got to the apartment.

"I'll get your bag just wait here." Derek said as he got out and ran inside. He came out about 5 minutes later with her bag.

Meredith laughed. "Did you run up the stairs?"

Derek smiled and nodded as he started up the car and pulled out of the parking lot. Meredith gave directions to her house. He pulled up to the house and turned off the car. When he looked at her he could tell she was nervous. "Do you want me to come in?"

She smiled. "No you need to get going. Thank-you Derek for letting me stay with you guys." She got out of the car.

Derek got out also and looked at her. "You're welcome Meredith. You know where to find me if you need me ok?"

Meredith nodded to Derek and took a deep breath as she walked to the door. She knew Derek was still watching her because she hadn't heard his car start and she wanted to get into the house as soon as possible. As she went to open the door it flew open and her mother was standing before her.

"What are you doing here?"

"I'm home from school mom."

"I told you to leave last night. Why would you come back?"

"This is my home." She got tears in her eyes.

Dr. Grey saw the tears. "Are you crying?" Meredith shook her head no. "Good because you know how I feel about crying."

"Are you home for dinner tonight? I can order something if you want." Meredith went to walk into the house.

Dr. Grey stopped her and raised her voice. "You really are stupid aren't you Meredith? I really don't know how you got accepted to college. When I told you to leave last night it wasn't just for the night. Mr. Spencer called me and told me about what the parents are saying. How could you do this to me? I have given you everything and all you do is embarrass me."

"I only have 5 more months before I leave for college."

"You think your grown up well you need to act like it. I've notified the bank about your trust fund and have made all the arrangements so from now on Meredith Grey you are on your own. I will not have you embarrassing me any longer now leave, I have to get back to the hospital." Dr. Grey stepped back into the house and slammed the door.

Meredith wiped her eyes and turned around. She saw Derek leaning against his car. She slowly made her way to him. "That didn't go to well." She said with a smile.

"No I guess it didn't. Come on get in." He opened the door for her and she got in. He got in, started the car, and drove off.

"Just um…drop me off at the Inn next to the hospital? "

Derek looked at her like she had two heads. "No."

"Ok, just drop me off at that gas station up there." She pointed ahead. "I can call a taxi from there."

"No Meredith I won't drop you off. You are going to come home with me. You can stay with us."

"No Derek, that's too much to ask of you guys. You all are interns and have to focus on your jobs. I don't want to…I just won't be…"

"What Meredith?"

"A burden, I won't be a burden to you like I have been to my mom. She's right I am grown up now, I can take care of myself."

Derek had pulled into a parking spot in front of his apartment and turned off the car. He quickly got out, went around to Meredith's side of the car and opened the door. He grabbed her hand and helped her out. She was standing in front of him when he placed his hand under her chin and forced her to look up at him. "Meredith I do believe you can take care of yourself but you are not a burden. I can't imagine what you have been through growing up and from what you have gone through the few weeks I have known you, well I think you're pretty amazing. Please just stay with us let us be your friends." He saw tears in her eyes and wanted to lighten up the mood. "Besides Mark is the one who needs taking care of and when him and Addison get together against me, well it's not pretty so really you would be staying for me." He smiled at her.

"Ok."

"Ok."

Meredith quickly wiped her eyes. She wasn't going to cry and let him see that weakness. "So when are Mark and Addison coming home?"

Derek looked at his watch as they walked into the building and headed up to the apartment. "Well it's 5:30pm now and Addison got off at 5:00pm so they should be here soon. Mark was going to grab a movie and pizza on his way home since we have tomorrow off."

They entered the apartment and Derek put down her bag. Meredith turned to Derek as he was emptying his pockets on the counter. "Do you mind if I go take a shower before they get back and maybe lay down for a little bit?"

"Go ahead, I'll just watch some TV. Do you want me to wake you when they get back?"

Meredith nodded and headed to the bathroom as Derek took his spot on the couch and turned on the TV. When Meredith entered the bathroom she let out the breath she didn't know she was holding. She took a shower and then went into Derek's room and laid down. When her head hit the pillow she fell asleep.

"Derek we're home."

Derek looked over and saw Mark and Addison standing there. "Hello."

Addison looked at him. "She's here isn't she?"

Derek nodded and Addison sighed as she took off her coat and went into the living room sitting down next to him. Mark put down the pizza and took of his coat as he went into the living room. "What happened?"

"I don't know where to start."

Addison looked to Mark and back to Derek. "Start from when you left the hospital."

Derek stood and started pacing. "I got to her school and saw Izzie so I asked where she was. She told me she was in with the principle so I waited by the door. When I checked the time it was 3:30pm and I was getting anxious so I looked around and saw Christina standing by some lockers. I walked up to her to see if she had seen Meredith. When I got to her I noticed something on one of the lockers and asked her if it was Meredith's locker. She didn't answer so I took it as a yes. Then…"

Mark cut him off. "What was on the locker?"

Derek stopped pacing and looked at the two. "Someone had taken spray paint and wrote the words slut and whore on her locker."

"No one cleaned it off?"

"No. I wanted to storm into the principal's office when Meredith came down the hall and started cleaning out her locker." Derek continued with the story all the way up through when they arrived back at the apartment. When he was finished he stopped pacing again and looked at Addison and Mark.

Mark spoke first. "You know she is a brilliant doctor but how can anyone treat their own child like that? She must not be human, no human would treat their own child like that would they?"

Addison wiped the tears from her eyes and pated Mark on the shoulder. "Derek you did the right thing bringing her back here. Where is she?"

"When we got home she asked to take a shower and then she said she wanted to lay down for a little bit. I told her I'd wake her when you got home so I'll go get her." Derek went and woke her.

Meredith walked into the living room with a smile on her face and Derek behind her. "Did you leave us some pizza?"

"Of course we did."

"Thanks Mark. So what movie did you get?"

Derek, Meredith, Mark, and Addison watched the movie before turning in neither of them talking about what had happened.

The next morning they started a new chapter of their lives. Meredith woke up early and quickly got dressed. She put on coffee and decided to make breakfast for her three new friends. She went with eggs because she didn't know how to put anything else together. She quietly found a pan and started to cook the eggs. Before she knew it the smoke detector was going off.

Derek, Mark, and Addison all came running in. "What's going on?" They asked as they started fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector. It didn't take them long before the smoke was gone and they all looked to Meredith.

"I just was…I wanted to make you guys breakfast." She saw Mark, Addison, and Derek were all looking at her. She eyed Derek pointing the spatula at him. "Look Dr. Sheppard you are the one who said you needed a good breakfast in the morning."

Derek couldn't believe how cute she looked pointing the spatula at him. "If you wanted breakfast you could have told me I would have made you something so you didn't have to burn down our apartment."

"I didn't burn it down there was no fire and I have breakfast already this was for you guys."

"Oh really, what is it that you are going to eat?"

Meredith walked over to the fridge and pulled out the left over pizza. She then grabbed her cup of coffee and headed to the table. "I do just fine with leftovers."

"Look Addison she fits right in. Is there enough for us?" Mark asked with a smile still on his face.

"Sure but you have to get your own coffee." Meredith said before she took a bit of the pizza. Then she turned back to Derek. "There's enough for you too if you want."

"Mer you were suppose to be on my side remember?"

Meredith just shrugged her shoulders as she took another bite.

Derek rolled his eyes and smiled as he sat down at the table and grabbed a piece of pizza. "Fine but this is the one and only time you will make breakfast understood?"

Meredith was about to respond when Mark cut her off. "And it's the last time you will ever be allowed in the kitchen."

Meredith watched the three around her and as they all started laughing she joined in. She realized she was starting to feel at home with them.

_Thank-you all again for your reviews you guys are Awesome! I got more the last chapter then the previous ones and because of that I wanted to update as soon as possible. This chapter was a long one. I was going to break it up but I thought it went better all together so I hope you like it. The next chapter will probably be another long one and then we will see what happens. Also to let you know this will be a Mer/Der story. Thank-you all again for the reviews and please let me know what you think._


	6. Chapter 6

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 6

Meredith took her finals and passed all of her classes. She was still having nightmares about the night with Luke. Some nights she would wake up screaming and crying. Those were the nights when Derek, Mark, or Addison would actually have to wake her up. They would let her cry on their shoulder and then when she calmed down they would sit with her until she went back to sleep. Other times she would wake herself up and end up in the shower scrubbing herself clean. She knew they were worried about her but she wasn't ready to talk about it.

The day of the trial finally approached. She hadn't told her new friends because she didn't want to bother them and she knew that Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George all had school. Meredith didn't want to go but the DA had told her it would be better if she was there so she agreed. The first day she waited for Derek, Mark, and Addison to leave before she called a taxi to come and get her. She realized how much she didn't want to be there when Luke walked into the courtroom she felt like someone had hit her in the stomach. That night when the court dismissed the ADA gave her a ride back to the apartment after finding that she was going to take a taxi. The ADA gave Meredith her card and let her know that she would be there to pick her up and bring her home during the trial. When Meredith got into the apartment she found that no one else was home so she went to the shower right away. Soon she heard Addison at the door so she quickly got out and got dressed. When she opened the door Addison met her. "You're home early."

Addison saw Meredith's puffy eyes so she knew she had been crying. "Meredith what's wrong?"

Meredith didn't want to talk about it so she changed the subject. "Did you get in on any good surgeries today?"

Addison knew what Meredith was doing but she decided to play along. "Not today, I was in the pit. I didn't even get to see Derek or Mark. They should be home in a little bit and I think they were going to pick up dinner."

"That's good. I think I'm just going to go to bed early tonight. I've had a long day. I'll see you in the morning."

"Meredith?"

"I'm fine Addison, I'm just really tired. Goodnight." Meredith said as she closed the door behind her. As soon as she hit the bed she was a sleep.

Addison watched her close the door and then she went out and turned on the TV. Soon Derek and Mark came home with take out.

"Where's Meredith?"

"She said she was tired so she went to bed after taking a shower."

"Didn't she take a shower this morning?"

Addison and Derek both shot a look at Mark after his question. "Do you think she's getting sick Addison?"

"I'm not sure she said she was fine but we all know what that means." Addison looked at the other two before she continued. "Let's just see how she is tomorrow."

They all agreed so they finished eating and watched some TV before they went to bed. That night Meredith had another nightmare and Derek was there to comfort her.

The next day Derek, Mark, and Addison left for the hospital late. Meredith was worried that the ADA would come when they were still home but luckily they all agreed to leave minutes before Meredith heard the knock on the door. She figured they just missed each other in the elevator. That day Alex and Mike both testified. Mike went first telling about how Luke had planned on Meredith getting drunk so that he could just take advantage of her. He also said that when Luke saw that she had stopped drinking that night he had to change his plans. And finally he talked about what Luke had said after it happened and after Meredith was taken to the hospital. Next was Alex. His testimony didn't take long since all he could talk about was when he saw Luke come out of the room and then finding Meredith. When Meredith got home Addison and Mark were home and once again she didn't feel like talking. She quickly avoided them and made her way to the bathroom. Again she took a shower and headed to the bed.

"Addi do you really think she's ok?"

"Honestly Mark no, I don't but I don't know how to help her." Just then the phone rang. "I'll get it."

"I wasn't planning on moving."

Addison rolled her eyes as she got up and answered the phone. "Hello."

"Hello can I please speak with Meredith Grey?"

"She's sleeping, can I take a message?" Addison answered as she waved to Derek who had just come home and took a spot on the couch.

"Yes this is ADA Jenson and I just needed to tell her that we need her to testify first tomorrow."

"Testify?"

Derek and Mark both looked at Addison who was in the kitchen. Mark turned down the TV so they could listen.

"Yes she is our last witness against Luke and we wanted to rest our case before the lunch break."

"I'm sorry, when did the trial start?"

Upon hearing Addison both Mark and Derek got up and went into the kitchen after Mark had turned off the TV.

"Yesterday but her friends Alex and Mike testified today. I think they did good but we really need her testimony for this case. Anyway if you could just remind her that I'll be there at 8am to pick her up I would really appreciate it."

"You know where we live?"

"Yes, I brought Meredith home yesterday and I picked her up and dropped her off today. I didn't want her taking a taxi like she did yesterday. I really need to go so can you just please give her the message?"

"Yes, No wait ADA Jenson was it?"

"Yes?"

"There's no need for you to come tomorrow morning. I took the day off tomorrow to be with her so I will bring her."

"Ok thank-you then I will see you tomorrow morning."

"Yes goodbye." After she heard the other end click she put down the phone but didn't move.

Mark placed his hand on her shoulder. "What was that about Addison?"

"It was ADA Jenson. She said they need Meredith to testify first thing in the morning so that they can rest their case against Luke before lunch."

"What?"

"Apparently the trial started yesterday and today her friends Alex and Mike testified. Did either of you know anything about a trial?"

Both Derek and Mark shook their heads no.

"That's why she has been avoiding us. The ADA said she took a taxi to the trial yesterday morning and the ADA gave her a ride home and then picked her up this morning and brought her home so that she wouldn't have to keep taking a taxi."

"Meredith has to testify against him?"

Addison looked at Derek and saw his hands making fists on the counter. "Derek."

"Why wouldn't she tell us? We should be there for her."

"I know Derek but you know how she is. Anyway don't worry I'm going to be with her tomorrow."

"I will too."

"I don't think that would be a good idea Derek."

"Why?"

"Because she's not ready to talk about it yet."

"Then why is it ok for you to go?"

Mark spoke up knowing Derek wasn't going to listen to Addison. "Derek I think Addison is right."

"I can't not be there. I would have been there the last 2 days if she would have told me."

"She can't have you there Derek."

"Why the hell not?"

"Derek lower your voice."

"Because Derek she cares about you and you care about her."

"So do you and Mark, why won't she let us help her?"

"She has to go into that courtroom in front of all those people that don't know her and tell them all how that kid raped her. Yes we know she was raped but we don't know the details. In court they are going to make her relive every moment of that night and probably her whole relationship with him. You can't be there for that, neither of you can be there for that." Derek and Mark looked at each other and then back to Addison when she continued. "I'm off tomorrow so I will go with her. You both need to go in like normal and let her come to you when she is ready understood?" They both nodded. "Good now I'm going to go to bed. Goodnight." Addison said as she gave Mark a kiss and headed to bed.

Once Addison had left Derek turned to Mark. "I can't just go to work knowing what she is going to have to go through tomorrow."

"Derek you heard Addison."

"Mark are you going to be able to work?"

"Probably not but I don't want to make it harder for Meredith."

"I don't either but I want to be there for her, Mark I need to be there for her."

"Ok Derek. Maybe we can sneak in without anyone seeing us but if Addison catches us this is so your fault. How are you going to get out of work?"

"I hit 40 hours today so I can't go in anyway." Derek said with a smile. "What about you?"

"I switched with James knowing Addison had the day off." Mark smiled back. "Let's get to bed so we can be ready for tomorrow." Derek headed to the couch as Mark headed to the bedroom. When he got in he crawled in next to Addison and wrapped his arms around her.

"Just make sure she doesn't see you guys tomorrow."

"Were you listening?"

"No I just know you two better than you know yourselves." Mark chuckled. "Mark I mean it, if she sees you guys it could break her and she doesn't need that."

"Ok I'll make sure we get into the courtroom before you two and we will sit in one of the back corners so she can't see us. We'll leave before you guys do and we can even get some food on the way home. How does that sound?"

"It sounds ok as long as it works."

"It will. Goodnight Addi."

"Goodnight Mark." Addison replied and they went to sleep.

Morning came and Meredith quickly got up and dressed before heading to the kitchen. Coming out of the room she heard Derek, Mark, and Addison in the kitchen so she put on her smile and approached them. "Good morning guys. Does anyone have any good surgeries today?"

Derek, Mark, and Addison all replied. "No."

"We better get going Derek, we don't want to be late."

"Yeah your right. We'll see you ladies later then." Derek replied heading to the door.

"I'll pick up something to eat on the way home ok Addi?"

"Sounds good, bye Mark, bye Derek." Addison said as Mark and Derek left the apartment.

"When do you go in Addison?"

"I'm not going in today, I'm off."

Meredith started to panic. "What do you mean your off?"

"I have the day off so I'm going to spend the entire day with you."

"You can't."

Addison saw the panicked look on Meredith's face. "Meredith, I know where you have been the last 2 days and I know where you are going today and what you need to do."

"You do, how?"

"The ADA called last night. She wanted to let you know that they need you to testify first thing this morning. They want to rest their case before lunch. Why didn't you tell us?"

"You guys have to work and I can do this on my own. I've been on my own for many years, I've learned how to deal with things."

"Letting your friends support you is ok."

"It shows weakness. If you can't do things on your own…it shows weakness and that's not me."

"More words from Dr. Grey I presume." Meredith nodded. "We know you are not weak Meredith. You have been through something terrible we care about you and want to help you. Please let me do this for you."

Meredith thought for a minute. Maybe it would be good having Addison there with her. "Ok."

Addison sighed. "Good we better get going."

Meredith nodded and they both walked to the car. Addison drove to the courthouse and they both walked in. Meredith introduced her to the DA and ADA and then they went into the courtroom. When they got into their seats the DA turned around and started talking to Meredith about her testimony. Addison took that moment to look around the courtroom and see if she spotted Mark and Derek. When she turned to the right she saw them in the very back row all the way at the end. She just hoped they would keep calm once Meredith took the stand.

After about 15 minutes they brought Luke in. Meredith straightened up and Addison grabbed her hand. She leaned into Meredith and whispered in her ear. "It's ok Meredith, I'm here." Meredith held tight to Addison's hand. After the judge came in Meredith was called to the stand and was sworn in. The DA asked Meredith to tell the court what had happened the night in question. She explained what had happened before the party at her house and then she explained what happened when they first got to the party. She explained how she had started drinking but stopped when her friend did and shortly after that Luke had approached her and led her upstairs. She then said that when they got in the room Luke had locked the door and started kissing her before he pushed her to the bed. That's when she got tears in her eyes and paused. The DA wanted to take a recess for her but Luke's attorney objected and the judge agreed saying he wanted to hear the whole story before taking a break. That's when she thought about Derek and Mark in the back. She wanted to look back and make sure they were ok but she knew Meredith would notice since Meredith was staring at Addison while she was telling what had happened.

Derek had wanted to jump up the moment he saw Luke brought into the courtroom. Mark had given him a stern look and Derek knew Mark was thinking the same thing but he wasn't going to move. Soon Meredith took the stand and started talking about that night. She explained what had happened at her house and when they got to the party. It wasn't until he saw the tears and heard her pause that he had the urge to jump up again. Mark felt Derek shift his body and knew what he was thinking so he reached over and put his hand on Derek's arm hoping to calm him. Thankfully it worked.

Addison nodded to Meredith to get her to continue which she did. Meredith explained every detail of what happened in that room. When she was done Addison had tears in her eyes and the DA said he didn't have any other questions. Next was the cross examination. Meredith answered all of their questions in between the objections. She had tears in her eyes the entire time but she didn't let them fall. Addison in that moment hated Dr. Grey even more because she knew Meredith wasn't letting her tears fall because she was thinking about how Dr. Grey felt about crying. Finally the cross examination was over and Meredith was able to take her seat next to Addison. Meredith wiped her eyes and then left the stand and took her seat next to Addison. When she sat down Addison put her arm around her shoulders and told her she did good. The DA then stated they had no other witnesses so the judge called a recess until the next day which would be when the defense attorney would present his case.

After the judge left Luke was escorted out of the courtroom and Addison felt Meredith relax. The DA and ADA approached Meredith and told her that the defense only had 3 people that were going to testify. The DA explained that he expected the first 2 to testify before lunch and then Luke would testify after lunch so there should only be one more day of testimony before closing arguments. Meredith and Addison nodded their understanding and both left the courtroom after the DA reminded them to be back at 9am the next day. When they were leaving Meredith had her head down and Addison was able to look over at Mark and Derek. She saw fire in both their eyes as they continued walking past.

"Derek we need to get going."

"I want to kill him Mark. How could he do that to her?"

"I know Derek." Mark saw the look on Derek's face so he continued. "She's like a little sister Derek and he hurt her. No one hurts family. He's lucky he's locked up right now." Derek nodded his understanding. "Now come on we need to get going. I'll call Addison and see if I can find out what they are going to do since they are done sooner than they thought they would be." Derek nodded again and both of them left the courtroom and headed to the car.

"So do you want to get something to eat?"

"Sure."

"What are you hungry for?"

"Can we just do McDonald's? Its fast and I just really want to get home if you don't mind."

"Ok McDonalds it is." Addison drove to a McDonalds by their apartment. They went in and ate before heading back to the apartment. When they got back Addison didn't know what to say to help her. Luckily she didn't have to say anything because Meredith spoke first.

"When are Derek and Mark due home?"

"I think they said they would be back around 7pm tonight. I was going to have them grab a movie if you want."

"No that's ok. I need to be back to the court house early so I don't think I should stay up too late. Do they know?"

"Yes they know about the trial. They were home when the ADA called. They really wanted to be there for you today."

"I just don't want them to judge me."

"That's the stupidest thing I have ever heard you say."

Meredith's eyes went wide when she heard that from Addison. "Thanks Addison thanks a lot. You are suppose to be my friend that's something my mother would say not my friend." Meredith started down the hall and called over her shoulder. "I'm going to go take a nap."

"Meredith wait." Addison said running up to Meredith and stopping her. "I'm sorry I didn't mean that. I didn't want to hurt you. I just want you to know how much we care about you. Why won't you to let us help you get through this trial?"

Meredith didn't know what to say. She saw the pleading look in Addison's eyes, a small part of her wanted to give in but she still had a small feeling that if Derek knew what had happened he would look down on her and she just couldn't live with that. "I know you care Addison but this is something I have to go through on my own. Can you just wake me when they get home please so I can call Christina?"

Addison nodded as Meredith went into Derek's room. She headed back to the living room and slouched down on the couch as she heard the phone ring and she picked it up. "Hey Mark where are you guys?"

"We were just on our way back how is she?"

"Don't come back yet."

"What?"

"I told her you wouldn't be back until around 7pm so don't come back yet I don't want her to be suspicious. We stopped at McDonalds, I called her stupid, and now she's taking a nap that's how she is."

"What?"

"Yeah well she said she didn't want you and Derek to judge her which is why she didn't want you guys at the trial. I said it was the stupidest thing I've heard her say and…"

"Did you explain what you meant?"

"Yes but I don't know if she will forgive me. I was just trying to help and now I think I've made it worse. I know she needs time but I just want her to know she can count on us."

"I know Addi but like you said time. That's the conversation I've been having with Derek."

"How is he doing?"

"He's ok. He wants to kill the bastard just like I do but we both know that won't help her."

"I'm glad he has you with him."

"Yeah me too. So what are we suppose to due for the next 6 hours?"

Addison chuckled. "I don't know maybe you should go to a movie, see a double feature."

"Thanks Addi, I'll talk to you in a little bit. Love you."

"Love you too Mark, bye." Addison hung up and turned on the TV laying down on the couch. Soon she was asleep.

"NO PLEASE GET OFF OF ME, DON'T DO THIS, NO!"

Addison jumped up and realized it was coming from the bedroom. She ran in and saw Meredith thrashing in bed so she quickly approached her and woke her up. "Meredith, Meredith your safe. Wake up."

Meredith heard her name being called and opened her eyes finding Addison in front of her. "I'm sorry Addison."

"You don't have anything to be sorry for Meredith, it was a nightmare."

"What time is it?"

"It's 6:30pm, they should be home in a half hour. Do you want to talk about it?"

"No but I think…" Meredith paused.

"What is it?"

"I think I want some ice cream."

Addison smiled. "Any specific flavor?"

"Maybe Coffee, or Swirl, or Banana."

"Ok I'll go get some. Do you want to come?"

"No I think I'll take a shower and then call Christina before the boys get home."

"Alright that sounds good, I have a few other groceries to get anyways so I should be back by the time they get back. Call my cell if you need anything." Addison said getting up and heading out of the bedroom.

Meredith got up and headed for the bathroom as she saw Addison heading to the door. "Bye Addison." She watched as Addison waved and walked out the door. Meredith went to the door, locked it and then headed back to the bathroom. After she closed the door she looked in the mirror at herself and that's when everything that had happened that day started replying through her mind. She felt the tears so she quickly turned on the shower and after undressing she stepped in. She knew the water was hot and she realized that if she could really feel it she probably would have turned it down but she didn't care. She was hearing the whispers from the kids at school, she saw her locker, she replayed the conversation with the principle, and then the conversation with her mother. She replayed Alex and Mike's testimonies and then she heard her testimony and the things Luke's attorney had said. It was too much. That's when she let go and slid to the floor. She let her tears flow. She thought again about what her mother said about crying but she didn't care at this moment because her mother wasn't there and obviously didn't want anything to do with her anymore and then she thought about what Addison said, maybe she did need to let Mark and Derek help her. All these thoughts kept running through her mind and it only made her cry harder. She just closed her eyes and continued to cry with her arms wrapped around herself as she laid down on the floor of the shower.

Addison met Derek and Mark in the parking lot so she made them help her with the bags. Once they got into the apartment and put the bags down Addison realized the shower was on. She headed to the bathroom and knocked on the door. "Meredith are you ok?"

"Addi what is it?"

"I left almost forty-five minutes ago and she was getting into the shower then. She should be done by now. Meredith it's me Addi, are you ok in there?" Nothing. Addison tried the handle and found it again unlocked. She pushed the door open. "Meredith?" She quickly looked around and saw the shower running but she didn't see anyone there. She stepped in further. "Meredith." She slowly slid the door open and saw her laying on the ground crying. "Oh Meredith." She quickly shut off the water. "Derek, Mark get me some towels and blankets. The water was ice cold."

Derek and Mark looked at each other when Derek spoke. "You get a couple blankets and I'll get the towels." Derek stepped to the closet and Mark went to the spare room. Derek got back first and handed Addison the towels.

Addison grabbed the towels from Derek and put them on Meredith covering her up. She was still crying. "It's ok Meredith. Everything is going to be ok."

Derek stepped in behind Addison knowing that Meredith was covered and when he saw Meredith laying there crying his heart broke. Mark came in with a couple blankets and Derek grabbed them out of his hands. He gave one to Addison who covered Meredith up and then he took the other one and put it on her. After he had put his blanket on her he slowly leaned down and picked her up. She immediately put her arms around his neck and buried her face in his chest. When he stood he looked at Addison who nodded to him. He went into his bedroom. He didn't want to put her down. He knew Addison and Mark were watching from the door so he gently kneeled down and tried to put her on the bed. When he went to let go she squeezed him tighter. "Please don't go." Derek didn't hesitate. He gently laid her on the bed while he laid down beside her.

"You can talk to me if you want."

She slowly lifted her head and looked into his eyes. She knew he wasn't going to hurt her and she decided she needed to try trusting someone. At that moment, she revealed a little bit about herself. She told him about her childhood growing up, about the reputation she earned through school, and about her father. She didn't talk about Luke. She knew she should have but she just wasn't ready for that yet.

He listened to her. He knew she wasn't telling him everything but he was happy to know that she was trusting him with the information she was and he wasn't going to push. He decided it would be better not to say anything until she was done. He didn't want her to shut herself off so he just laid there. When she finished talking Derek reached over and wrapped her back in a hug.

Addison and Mark were still standing at the door listening to Meredith. Mark had placed his arms around Addison as they were listening. When Meredith was done Mark leaned down and whispered in Addison's ear. "I think they will be ok. Let's go watch some TV." Addison nodded and they quietly slipped out of the room.

"Derek?"

"Yes."

"Do you…tomorrow…can you…"

"What is it Meredith?"

"Can you maybe come with me tomorrow…to the courthouse…I understand if you have to work it's ok, I just…"

Derek cut her off. "Meredith I'll be there."

"Good, I think that will be good." Meredith paused until she heard a rumbling and she looked up at Derek. "Are you hungry?"

Derek smiled.

"Go ahead Derek. I'm fine."

"You know for the first time since I met you, I almost believe you this time when you say you're fine." Derek smiled even bigger as he gave her a kiss on the top of her head and got up.

Meredith smiled and as Derek walked out of the room she turned over and closed her eyes.

Derek went out to the living room and grabbed the phone. "Jake, I need a favor. I need you to cover my shift tomorrow. I'll work you're next double. Thanks." Derek hung up the phone with a smile and went to the living room where he found Addison and Mark watching TV. "Did you guys eat?"

"Not yet. What was that about and how's Meredith?"

"I think she's ok. I know she didn't tell me everything but she opened up a little so it's a start. I wanted to give her some time."

"Why did you call Jake?"

"Because she asked me to come to the courthouse with her tomorrow and I wasn't going to say no."

"That's big Derek."

"I know Addi, I'm not going to do anything to hurt her or make her think she can't trust me. I promise you."

Mark smiled. "You know you're hopeless now?"

"What are you talking about Mark."

Derek smiled knowing exactly what he was talking about. "I know but can you blame me?"

"What are you two talking about?"

"You better tell her Mark before she gets mad. I'm going to go check on Meredith, I'll be back in a couple minutes." Derek got up and headed to his bedroom.

"Mark?"

"Calm down Addi. We just mean she is the only one for him."

"What?"

"He's completely fallen for her and there's no going back for him." He looked at the confused look on her face. "You know what I'm saying. He thinks she's the one. You know soul mate and all."

Addison smiled. "Are you turning into a woman or something? I thought we were the only ones that talk about stuff like that."

"We talk about it too. We just don't use the same words you women do."

Addison rolled her eyes as Derek came back. "She's sleeping. Who's making dinner?"

"I guess I will." Mark said as he got off the couch and went to the kitchen.

Mark made something to eat and shortly after eating they turned into bed. That was the first night that they all slept through the entire night since Meredith had estarte staying with them.

The next morning came and Meredith, Derek, Addison, and Mark got up, got dressed, and sat down for breakfast. When they were done Meredith, Derek, and Addison grabbed their coats and headed to the door as Mark headed to the couch. After Derek and Addison stepped out into the hall Meredith asked them to wait for just a moment while she stepped back into the apartment and went to Mark. "Do you have to work today?"

"No."

"Well can you…do you want to…can you come with us?"

Mark smiled as he shut off the TV and walked to the door. "I was hoping you would ask. Besides you probably need someone to keep Derek in line."

They stepped out into the hall. "Thanks Mark." Meredith said as she looked to Derek and Addison. "I think we better get going."

The four drove to the courthouse in silence. Once they got there they went in and found the DA and ADA. Meredith introduced Derek and Mark to them. They were all headed into the courtroom when Derek spoke. "Dr. Webber what are you doing here?"

Richard Webber approached them. "Dr. Sheppard, Dr. Sloan, and Dr. Montgomery how are you." He said as he shook their hands then he turned to Meredith.

"Richard what…what are you doing here?"

Richard gave her a hug. "Your mom told me about the trial and I wanted to support you."

Meredith was surprised. "My mother knows about the trial, is she here?"

"I haven't seen her yet but she said she was going to be here." That's when they were advised that court was about to start so they needed to get in the courtroom.

Meredith followed the DA and ADA in with Derek beside her and Addison, Mark, and Richard where behind her. Meredith sat between Derek and Addison with Mark on the other side of Addison and Richard sat in the row behind them. When they sat Richard leaned forward and tapped Derek on the shoulder as Meredith was leaning forward talking to the DA and ADA.

"Dr. Sheppard I want you, Dr. Montgomery, and Dr. Sloan to know that I have talked to the chief." As he said that Addison and Mark both also turned their attention to him and he continued. "You three need to be here for her. I'm not sure what her mother is doing but Meredith needs people around her that will support her especially through this trial so you all will have the next week off until this is over and if the trial lasts longer than that we will make arrangements." The three went to protest but Richard held up his hand. "She's like a daughter to me, I've known her since the day she was born and she doesn't deserve this. I can't just take her in." Richard saw their expressions. "Ellis told me she made her leave. I was worried about her until I saw her walking in with you. Just take care of her."

The door to the courtroom opened and Lucas was escorted in. Again Meredith stiffened but this time both Derek and Addison grabbed her hands and Meredith calmed. The judge entered and once everyone was seated again the defense attorney started.

The first witness was Lucas' mother she testified stating that Lucas was a good kid who just got too drunk. She also stated that Meredith flaunted herself in front of him and and other guys. During the testimony Meredith continued to hold hands with Derek and Addison. The next to testify was Lucas. He told about that night but he blamed everything on Meredith saying that it was what she wanted and that things did get a little rough but again it was what Meredith wanted.

During Luke's testimony Derek put his arm around Meredith's shoulders. He couldn't believe what this bastard was saying and all he could do at that time was lend his shoulder and hand.

Luke finished his testimony and they had a recess for lunch. Meredith, Derek, Addison, and Mark all went to a deli close to the courthouse to eat. Meredith didn't eat but she did order something to drink. They kept the conversation light especially since Meredith wasn't talking. Finally they headed back to the courthouse. They all took their seats when Derek spoke. "Meredith what are you thinking about?"

"My mom. She told Richard about the trial but she hasn't come herself. Why wouldn't she come?"

Derek was about to speak when Richard's pager went off. He looked back at Richard who mouthed hospital. Richard made his exit as Lucas was brought back into the courtroom with a smile on his face as he looked at Meredith. Derek squeezed her hand as he stared at him. Next the judge came back in and again the defense attorney stood to call the next witness.

"Your honor the defense calls Dr. Ellis Grey."

Meredith inhaled her breath as the doors to the courtroom opened and in walked Dr. Ellis Grey. She was sworn in and took her seat. "Please don't do this mom." Meredith whispered. Derek, Addison, and Mark all looked at Meredith with sympathy.

The DA turned around to Meredith and asked her some questions that Derek, Addison, and Mark couldn't hear as the testimony started. Dr. Grey was considered a character witness and she testified to the same things that Luke's mom did. The DA tried to object many times saying that Meredith was not the one on trial but for some reason the judge let Dr. Grey continue. When she was done she calmly got off the stand and took a seat behind Luke next to his mother.

After Dr. Grey's testimony the defense rested. The judge called recess until the next day which would be closing arguments and then he left. Luke was allowed to give his mom a hug and then he was escorted out of the courtroom. Next Luke's mom gave Dr. Grey a hug before leaving the courtroom.

Meredith, Derek, Addison, and Mark had not moved from their spots. Meredith had tears in her eyes as she watched her mother's testimony and then watched the interaction with his mother.

Derek didn't want her to go through this any longer so he leaned in and whispered to her. "Come on Mer let's go home." Then he stood and helped her up as Addison and Mark stood to leave with them. They got to the door of the courtroom when Dr. Grey approached them.

"Are you crying?"

Meredith shook her head. "Why…why would you take his side over mine?"

"Because you are stupid." Addison cringed as she continued. "You are stupid and you're crying. You are weak and you think before you act. You will never be a good surgeon."

Meredith watched as Derek, Addison, and Mark all went to say something but she cut them off. "Don't. Don't say something that will ruin your careers. It's not worth it."

"She's right for the first time in seventeen years. You're not worth it."

Derek had his arm around Meredith's shoulder. "She's eighteen." He then turned back to Meredith. "We should go. Come on." And he lead Meredith to the car.

Addison and Mark were left standing with Dr. Grey. "You're not human are you?"

"What was that Dr. Sloan?"

"Mark don't. We need to go." Addison said as she pulled Mark's arm and they started walking out to the car.

"Addi why did you do that? I wanted to hear her answer."

"Because if you lost your job Meredith would not be very happy and she doesn't need anything else to worry about."

When everyone was in the car they quietly drove back to the apartment. Meredith headed to the bedroom as Addison and Mark took their seats on the couch.

Addison saw Derek looking down the hall. "Go to her Derek just don't push her to hard."

Derek nodded and walked into his room. Meredith was sitting on the bed. Upon seeing Derek enter the room she quickly stood. "I'm just going to go take a shower and then go to bed, we have an early day tomorrow."

Derek stood in front of the door as she went to leave. "No Mer you don't need to take a shower."

"Please don't tell me what I need I can take care of myself now if you'll excuse me." Meredith pushed past him and headed down the hall.

"No Meredith." Derek shouted as he caught up to her in front of the bathroom.

"Derek I don't want to do this right now. I need to take a shower and go to bed."

Derek glanced down the hall and saw Mark and Addison watching him and then he looked back to Meredith. He took a step closer to her and wrapped his arms around her. "You don't need a shower Mer, just let it out."

Meredith tried pushing him away. "Derek let me go I want to take a shower, let me go Derek."

Mark and Addison came closer but Derek looked at them and gave a quick shake of his head telling them no. "Meredith you don't need to take a shower to cry just let it out."

"Derek let me go. Please just let me go."

"I am not going to let you go. Let it out Meredith."

Meredith continued to fight him as a tear rolled down her cheek. "I can't Derek, don't you see I can't now let me go."

"Meredith she's wrong. It doesn't show weakness, just quit fighting it and let it out. She's wrong Meredith. Your mother is wrong."

When she heard him say that to her she stopped fighting him and she gave in. "Why does she hate me so much? She took his side over mine Derek, I'm her daughter why does she hate me so much?" When she was done she collapsed in Derek's arms and she cried.

Derek caught her as she collapsed and he fell to his knees. He looked over her head to see Addison crying in Mark's arms. Mark gave him a nod letting him know he did the right thing so he picked her up and took her into his room. When he got there he sat down on the bed and continued to hold her as she cried. He continued to hold her tight as she let her tears fall. Derek knew she still had a lot of things to work through. But this was a big step for her. She finally cried truly cried out in the open, she really cried.

Meredith felt Derek pick her up and carry her into the bedroom. She was glad he didn't put her down instead he continued to hold her. She felt a sense of relief as she cried into his chest. Finally her cries turned to hiccups and the tears stopped. She sniffled and pulled away from Derek. She saw the wet spot on his shirt. "I'm sorry about that."

Derek looked down at what she was pointing at. "I think it will dry. Do you want to talk?"

Meredith shook her head no.

"Ok then how about you lay down and I'll go make a sandwich?"

"I'm not hungry."

"All you have had to eat today was a couple pieces of french toast this morning so I'll be right back."

"Derek don't go."

"Meredith, I'll be right back. I promise." Derek got up and left the room leaving Meredith on the bed.

Derek walked straight to the kitchen and started making two sandwiches. Mark and Addison came up to him.

"Derek."

"Don't Addi. I know I shouldn't have pushed her but…"

Addison cut him off. "Derek I think you did the right thing. I'm glad you were here for her."

"Yeah Derek we were taking. You did the right thing for her and now our water bill should go down."

"Mark!" Both Addison and Derek said at the same time.

"Don't Mark me. You both now she was taking to many showers." Mark replied with a smile and then looked at Derek seriously. "Just don't hurt her."

"I'm not going to hurt her I mean it." Derek said as he looked from Mark to Addison.

"I know Mark told me you think she's the one right?"

"Addi I don't think, I know. I love her." Derek saw Addison about to say something but he cut her off. "I know I can't tell her yet but I will when she's ready to hear it." Mark and Addison both smiled at him. "I've got to get back to her. I'll see you both in the morning." Derek grabbed the sandwiches and headed back to the bedroom. When he got back he closed the door and approached the bed. "Here you go, turkey and cheese just like you like."

Meredith smiled. "Thank-you Derek." Meredith said as she grabbed the sandwich.

They both ate their sandwich and when they were done Derek got ready for bed and then Meredith did.

Meredith walked back into the bedroom and laid down.

Derek pulled up the blanket around her and gave her a kiss on the head. "Goodnight Meredith."

"Derek, don't go. Please can you lay with me tonight?"

Derek smiled to himself and went around to the other side of the bed. He climbed in and wrapped his arms around her. His smile grew even bigger knowing that this time when she fell asleep he wouldn't have to go back to the couch.

"Derek?"

"Hmm."

"How is it that you know what I need and want?"

"I don't know Mer I just do." He wanted to tell her it was because he loved her and she was the one but he knew that it wasn't the right time for those confessions. "Let's not worry about that tonight. You need to get some sleep. Let's just sleep ok?"

"Ok, goodnight Derek."

"Goodnight Meredith."

Meredith closed her eyes with Derek's arms wrapped securely around her. She had a smile on her face and knew that she was going to get a good nights sleep.

_Thank-you again for the reviews! Sorry I couldn't get this up sooner but I kept getting an error. Anywhays, I wanted to get to the trial and build a little more of the relationship between Derek and Meredith but there's something about it I'm not to happy about. This is the last chapter with Ellis because I don't like writing her and the next chapter after this will be a filler because I want to move the story ahead in time. I'm not sure when it will be up so I'm not going to make any promises but I will promise as soon as it's done I will put it up that is unless you now hate this story and just want it to end. Please let me know either way. Thank-you again for your support so far!_


	7. Chapter 7

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 7

Closing arguments finished and it didn't take long before Meredith got the call that the jury had reached a verdict. Derek, Addison, and Mark all went with her and waited while the verdict to was read. Luke was found guilty. He was sentenced to 6 years in prison with the possibility of parole with good behavior. When Luke was being taken from the courtroom he turned to Meredith with a smile on his face and told her he would be back for her. Derek held her hand the entire time and when he felt her start to shake he wrapped his arms around her and told her she was safe. When Meredith looked into Luke's eyes she knew she wasn't truly safe.

After graduation Meredith was able to hang out with her friends. It was bittersweet because she knew that summer was coming to an end and then they would all be going their separate ways to college. They had made a promise to each other that they would all come back to Seattle for their internship but Meredith knew if her mother was there she wouldn't come back. She did promise to keep in touch with each of them during school.

Not long after graduation, Meredith woke up in the middle of the night and ran into the bathroom empting her stomach. She quickly cleaned herself up and returned to bed. The third night after she had cleaned herself up she opened the door to go back to bed and came face to face with Mark who had just come home.

"Meredith, are you ok?" He asked with a concerned voice.

Meredith smiled slightly. "I think I just have the flu Mark, I'm going back to bed."

"If you need something let us know."

"Thanks, goodnight Mark."

"Goodnight."

That afternoon when Derek got home he quickly made some soup and took it into Meredith. He saw she was sleeping and gently woke her. "Mer…Mer can you wake up for me?"

"Mmmm."

"Meredith honey please wake up for me."

Meredith opened her eyes and saw Derek sitting next to her. She smiled to him. "Hey, you're home."

"Hey yourself. I made you some soup. Can you sit up and eat it for me?"

"Derek I'm really not hungry right now."

"Mark told me you think you have the flu."

"I can't keep anything down, I just want to sleep Derek."

"How long have you been feeling this way."

"I guess about three days."

"Three days, why didn't you say anything?" Derek put his hand to her forehead. "You have a fever Meredith."

"I'm fine Derek it's not that high. I'm just tired."

"Having a fever and not being able to keep things down is not fine. I want to examine you."

"No Derek you are not my doctor anymore." Meredith said as she looked at Derek and saw his pleading look. "If I eat the soup will you let me sleep?"

Derek smiled. "If you eat the entire bowl."

"Fine just give me the stupid bowl." Derek smiled and gave her the bowl as Meredith started eating the warm liquid. "Ok it's good but how hard can it be to open a can of soup and warm it up. Don't look so full of yourself Dr. Sheppard I can at least make soup."

Derek smiled even bigger. "Well since you are banned from the kitchen I guess we will never know and I thought it was Dr. Mcdreamy."

Meredith rolled her eyes as she handed him the empty bowl. "Here and for the record, that was Christina's nickname, I never agreed to it. Now please just let me get some sleep so I can get over this."

"Ok, I'll check on you later." Derek gave her a kiss on the head as he tucked her back in and headed out of the room.

"Derek we got a movie and brought pizza." Mark said as he entered the apartment with Addison.

"Hey guys. That sounds good. I'm glad we all have the day off, it's been what 2 weeks since we all had the same day off?"

"I know we should all do something the four of us."

"That sounds good Addi but Meredith still isn't feeling very good so I don't think I'm going to go anywhere."

"Did you check on her?"

"That's a dumb question Addi." Mark said as he looked to Addison and then he turned back to Derek. "So what's wrong with her?"

Derek smiled. "She has a slight fever. She wouldn't let me examine her but she did eat a bowl of soup. She thinks it's just the flu but she said she's been like this for 3 days now."

"If you're that worried I could hold her while you do the examination."

Derek laughed. "We're talking about Meredith Grey here. Do you really want to force her to do something?"

Mark thought for a moment. "She's small I could hold her."

Derek decided to give up on him. "I just don't think it will be a good idea. Let's eat before the pizza gets cold."

They sat down to eat and watched the movie before going to bed.

Once again Meredith woke up and ran to the bathroom. She came out and came face to face with Addison. Meredith passed her and went back to the bedroom as Addison followed her.

"Meredith I really think you should let one of us examine you."

"Addison please just let me go back to bed. I've had the flu before and I just need to sleep it off."

Addison watched her laying there part of her knew if it was just the flu sleeping it off would be ok but there was a part of her that felt something was wrong and she didn't like the idea of not doing anything. She looked into Meredith's pleading eyes and decided to give in. "Ok but if you are not better in two days you are going to let me examine you no questions understood?"

Meredith nodded and Addison pulled the blanket up around her as she gave her a kiss on the head and went back to bed.

The next day Derek, Addison, and Mark decided to go miniature gulfing and then bowling. They went in to check on Meredith just in case she was feeling better but she wasn't. Derek had wanted to stay with her but she made him go. Before they left Derek put the phone on the bed next to her stating that he would call to check on her. After she heard the door shut Meredith went back to sleep. She woke up later in pain. She wanted to try and take some aspirin but she couldn't move. Meredith laid in bed moaning when about another hour or two had passed she heard the phone ringing. She rolled over and felt for the phone. "He…Hello."

She heard laughing. "Meredith you're awake."

"Who…who is this?"

"Meredith it's me Addi. We are at the bowling alley. This is our 3rd game and Derek and Mark are losing miserably."

"She's cheating!"

"I am not." Addison said away from the phone and then came back. "I just wanted to call and see How you are doing." She heard a soft moan and Addison quickly got up and walked away from Mark and out of view from Derek. "Meredith are you ok?"

"I'm fine, I just…" Meredith answered with a shaky voice.

"Meredith what is it?" Addison listened and she heard another moan this time louder. "Meredith answer me what's the matter?"

"It hurts, it just hurts." Meredith answered before she moaned again.

"Meredith we will be there in a few minutes ok?"

"No Addi enjoy your day off. I'll be ok, just…"

"Try to rest for a little bit longer we will be there in a few minutes, we're just down the road at the bowling alley." Addison quickly hung up the phone and went back to Mark and Derek. When she got back, Mark had just gone.

"Just in time, it's your turn Addi."

Addison didn't say anything she just walked up and hit the rest button on the screen.

Both Derek and Mark looked at her as she sat down and started taking off her rented shoes. "What was that?"

"We need to go." Addison said as she got up and headed for the door.

Derek and Mark both shared looks and then quickly changed their shoes before running out after Addison. They each got in the car and both looked at her but Mark spoke first. "What was that about?"

Derek looked at her a little harder. "It's Meredith."

Addison nodded and they left the bowling alley. They arrived back to the apartment and all three of them ran to the elevator. They finally got to their floor and quickly ran to the apartment. After entering they went to Meredith. Derek burst in first. "Meredith?" He saw her laying in bed wrapped in a ball crying. It looked like she was sweating. He felt her forehead. "You're burning up."

Meredith felt his hand on her but didn't say anything.

"Let's go she's going to the hospital." Derek leaned down to pick her up.

"Addison?"

"Meredith, we're going to take you to the hospital."

"No Addison." She cried again.

Derek took a step away from the bed and Addison sat down next to her. She put her hand to Meredith's forehead like Derek had. "Meredith honey Derek is right, you have a really high fever we need to take you to the hospital."

"Please make them leave."

Addison leaned down to Meredith. "What was that?"

"Derek and Mark, please make them leave."

"Ok." Addison turned to Derek and Mark who had each stepped closer wanting to hear what Meredith had said. "Can you two both please leave the room?"

"I'm not going anywhere I'm going to stay with her."

"Derek I know you don't want to but she asked for you both to leave. Please just go and I'll come out in a few minutes." Addison said looking at Mark for help.

Mark nodded. "Come on Derek. Let Addi talk to Meredith." Mark grabbed Derek's arm and they both walked out of the room.

When Addison saw the door close she turned back to Meredith. "Ok Meredith they are gone. Can you tell me what's wrong?"

Meredith cried harder. "It hurts."

"What hurts Meredith?"

Meredith didn't answer she wrapped her arms even tighter around herself.

Addison saw Meredith move slightly and pulled the blanket down to see her arms wrapped around her mid section. Meredith moaned again. "Meredith we need to get you to the hospital." Addison went to go to the door and called over her shoulder. "I'm going to get Derek to come get you."

"No Addison I just…this will pass."

Addison was stunned to hear her. She stopped and turned around. "What will pass?"

"The pain. When it's down it will pass right? That's what we talked about in health class, they said when it's down the pain goes away."

Addison took a few more steps back to Meredith and saw the covers had been scattered some when she got off the bed. She bent down to straighten them out when she noticed something on the bed. She pulled back the covers. "Meredith. Oh Meredith didn't you know?"

Meredith shook her head. "I'm a horrible person."

"No Meredith, this isn't your fault."

"How can you say that I didn't even know I was…I'm a horrible person…I'm just like my mother…I should have known." She cried harder.

Addison held her hand for a little longer until Meredith seemed to have calmed. "Meredith do you want me to get Derek?"

"No, he can't know about this."

"Meredith you can't keep this from him."

"I just don't know how to tell him."

"We can worry about that in the morning. We need to get you cleaned up and you should really go to the hospital and make sure everything is ok."

"I can't go to the hospital my mother would find out. I just can't please don't make me Addi, please."

"Ok. I'm going to go run a bath for you but Meredith you need to go to a doctor." Addison saw Meredith wanted to say something but she stopped her. "I'll call my OBGYN and set up an appointment for tomorrow afternoon. She has a private practice and she only goes to the hospital when she's needed in surgery. Ok?"

Meredith nodded. "I just don't want to see them right now."

Addison nodded, got up, and exited the room. When she went out into the hall she found both Derek and Mark waiting for her. "I need you guys to not be here right now." They both looked at her with questions on their faces. She only assumed they were questioning the tears in her eyes. "Meredith needs you to not be here."

"Are you taking her to the hospital?" Addison shook her head. "Why the hell not? She's in pain and she has a fever, she needs to go to the hospital."

"Derek please don't do this right now."

"I'm not leaving this apartment Addison."

"Fine then I want both of you in that bedroom." She pointed to her and Mark's closed door. "You need to keep that door closed until I can get her to sleep understood?" Neither of them budged. "I know you care about her and I promise I will talk to you when she is sleeping. She just…she can't see you right now."

They both agreed and watched as Addison went into the bathroom. They heard her start the bath. When it was done she came back out and went to open the door when she looked back at the two figures still standing in the hallway. They quietly walked into the other bedroom and closed the door. That's when Addison opened the door and approached Meredith. "Mer, I have a bath ready. Come on."

Addison helped Meredith to her feet. She leaned heavily on Addison, thankfully she didn't weigh much so it wasn't difficult for her to help Meredith. When they got in the bathroom, Addison helped Meredith undress and gently helped her into the bathtub.

Meredith felt the warm water around her. She closed her eyes for a few minutes. When she opened them again she saw Addison still in the room. "Can I have a few minutes alone?"

Addison nodded. "I'll go change the sheets and make you some tea. Call me when you're ready."

"Thank-you."

Addison walked out of the room and went to the kitchen to heat some water. Then she went to her bedroom. When she entered the room she saw Derek and Mark both sitting on the bed quietly waiting. She walked over to her dresser and opened a bottle. She took out 2 tablets and went back out of the room without saying a word.

"What was that?"

"Sleeping pills."

"What?"

"She doesn't use them often they are for when she gets her migraines."

"Why does she need sleeping pills?"

"I don't…" Mark stopped as he saw Derek moving to the door. "Derek?"

"I need to know what is going on." Derek said as he quietly opened the door. Mark followed him out. They went into Derek's room. Derek approached the bed and he stopped. Mark stepped in beside him. "Oh no."

"What are you two doing?" Addison said in a whisper, clearly upset.

Derek turned to look at her with tears in his eyes. "You need sleeping pills, I wanted to know why."

Addison stepped around them and started taking the blankets from the bed. "Are you happy you know now?"

Mark started helping her with the bed. "How is she?"

"She said she didn't know. She thinks she's was a horrible person because she didn't know and she thinks she's like her mother."

"Are you going to take her to the hospital?"

"She doesn't want to go because her mother could find out. I told her I would take her to my OBGYN in the afternoon. I just want her to get some rest tonight."

"Addison?"

"Both of you get back in that room. I'll come get you once she is asleep." Addison said as she grabbed some clothes for Meredith and went back to the bathroom.

"She takes two steps forward and ten steps back."

"What?"

"She took a big step when she opened up to me when she cried in front of us but now this happens."

"Do you think she won't be ok?"

"I know she can be but I don't know for sure how I can help her with this."

"What is Derek Sheppard saying there's something he can't do?"

"No." Mark just looked at him and Derek continued. "I am going to help her through this. I will think of somehow to help her because I love her Mark. I'm not going to give up on her like her mother and everyone else in her life seems to have done."

"Now that's the cocky, I can do anything, self assured, love sick Derek Sheppard I know and love." Mark said with a smile. He watched Derek smile.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes I just want to go back to bed."

Addison helped her out of the bath and helped her get dressed. They walked back to the bedroom and Addison helped Meredith back to bed. Addison left the room and came back with some tea. She handed it to Meredith. "Drink this, it will help you sleep."

Meredith took the cup and drank it. Addison grabbed her hand and held it as Meredith cried herself to sleep. Once Addison was sure Meredith was sleeping she left the room. She went to her room and told Mark and Derek that she was asleep now so they could come out. Addison decided to throw away the blankets and Meredith's clothes instead of trying to wash them. She went to put them in a garbage bag. She was having trouble when Mark walked up to her and helped her with the bag. Addison looked into his eyes and she couldn't help herself anymore. Mark knew it was coming so he held out his arms as Addison fell into them letting out all her tears. "Why do these things keep happening to her?"

"I don't know Addi. But I know it's good that you were here for her."

"I didn't do anything for her Mark, how are we going to get her through this?"

"You were there for her Addi. Can you imagine what this would be like if she was still with her mother? She wouldn't have had anyone. She'll get throw this I know she will."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I think some of Derek's faith is rubbing off on me. Besides she has you and me…who can resist me?" Mark pulled away from Addison and forced her to look at him. He smiled at her. "Addison, she will get through this."

Derek stepped into his room instead of following Mark. He just wanted to see her. He looked down at her and saw the tear stains, he knew that she had cried herself to sleep. He sat down and gently stroked her hair. "You are going to get through this Meredith. I know this is terrible, to lose a child…it's…. I know you are going to feel bad about this but this is not your fault and I am going to keep reminding you of that until you believe it. I love you Meredith Grey with everything in me I love you and I am not going to let this come between us." He leaned down and gave her a kiss before he stood and exited the room.

The next morning Derek and Mark went to the hospital after Addison forced them out of the apartment. Addison had called and set up an appointment for 1pm right after they left that morning. She busied herself around the apartment until she looked at the clock again and saw it was 11:30am. She then went into wake Meredith. "Meredith you need to get up." Addison gently shook her but she didn't move. "Meredith we have to be there in an hour. Come on Meredith you need to get up."

Meredith opened her eyes and looked at Addison wanting her to leave the room.

"No Meredith you need to go and make sure everything is ok. I know you just want to stay home today but you have to do this. I promise after we are done we will come right back home. Please Meredith."

Meredith didn't have the strength to fight. She got out of bed and headed to the bathroom without a word.

Addison and Meredith arrived at the doctor's office. Meredith took a seat while Addison wrote her name down. Addison brought the paperwork to Meredith who quietly filled it out. After a short wait they were called into the exam room. Meredith changed into the gown and sat on the exam table. When the doctor came in she asked some questions which Meredith answered with as short of answers as possible. Once the questions were done the doctor asked her to lay down so she could do the exam. When she was done the doctor left the room to let Meredith get dressed. The doctor came back and let Meredith know that she was ok. When Addison was done talking with the doctor they left and went back to the apartment. Meredith walked back into the bedroom and crawled back to bed. She quickly fell back asleep.

"Addi we're home."

Addison came out of her bedroom. "Hey."

"Where's Meredith, how did the appointment go, is she ok, is…"

Addison held up her hand. "Calm down Derek. She's in the bedroom. We went to the doctor and she's ok. We came back home and…" Addison paused taking a breath before continuing. "She's barley said a word. She answered the doctor's questions but that was it. She didn't say anything on the way there or on the way back. When we got back she went right into the bedroom. I checked on her a couple times but she was sleeping. I don't know how to help her with this."

"Maybe she just needs some time."

"She won't even talk about it. How can we help her if she won't even talk about it?"

"I'm going to go check on her." Derek walked down the hall and entered his room. He approached the bed and saw her laying there again with tear stains on her face. He listened to her breaths and knew she was asleep.

Derek watched her for a little bit before joining Addison and Mark. None of them knew what to say or do.

After the third day of silence Derek couldn't take it anymore. He picked up the phone and dialed.

"Where the hell have you been? Are you to good to keep in touch now?"

"Hello?"

"Who is this?"

"This is Derek, Dr. Derek Sheppard."

"Mcdreamy, where is she?"

"Christina?"

"Yes. I thought you were Meredith. She hasn't called me in 4 days where she is."

Derek didn't know what to say but he wondered if just maybe her other friends could help her. "She's here. Something happened and she's just…she's not…"

"Spit it out."

"She's not dealing with it."

"What did you do?"

"Christina this is not about me. This happened to her. She won't get out of bed. She hasn't spoken in three days. I don't know how to help her with this."

Christina heard the desperation in his voice. "I'll be over tomorrow afternoon and I'm bringing the others."

"Thanks Christina." Derek heard the phone click. He felt that maybe they could help her with this.

The next day Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George all showed up at the apartment with containers of ice cream. Mark opened the door and let them in. They handed the ice cream to Derek and Mark and asked them to put it in the freezer. They told them they would need it later.

"Hey guys." Meredith's friends looked to see Addison who had made her way into the room. "She's in Derek's room. She hasn't spoke in three days and she's hardly eaten anything."

"What's wrong with her?" Christina asked.

"I can't tell you that. If Meredith wants to tell you she will. I won't say anything without Meredith's ok."

Christina nodded her understanding. She saw the looks of desperation on the three doctors that were around them. "Which room?"

"Follow me, I'll show you." Derek stood and waited for the four friends to take off their coats before they followed him down the hall. He stopped in front of the door and slowly opened it as they walked in.

Meredith was still laying in bed with her eyes closed as Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George all stood around the bed.

"This is bad." George said from the side of the bed.

"Yeah, worse than when her dad left." Izzie agreed.

"Or when mom yelled at her during sixth grade graduation." Alex said.

"Or all the times her mom called her a slut and forgot her birthdays and Christmas's, or all the times her mom…" Meredith put her hand up to stop her. "That's what I thought you're not sleeping."

Meredith opened her eyes to look at Christina and then she looked at each of the others standing around her.

They all noticed her blood shot eyes. She hadn't been sleeping and clearly she had been crying. "You want to talk?" Alex asked. Meredith shook her head no. "So you're avoiding?" Meredith nodded. "Ok we can do that." Alex looked at the others. "Come on you know what this means."

At that George laid down across the bed next to the footboard. Izzie laid down next to him.

"No I don't want to do this." Christina whined.

"Come on Christina, Meredith is avoiding and she needs us so get your butt on this bed." Izzie ordered.

"It's touching. I don't do touching, or hugging, or…"

"Christina!" Izzie, Alex, and George called.

Christina rolled her eyes. "Fine, Mer move."

Meredith moved next to Izzie and Christina took her spot next to Meredith. Alex took his spot next to Christina by the headboard.

Alex and George were both propped up on their elbows watching Meredith as Meredith, Christina, and Izzie all laid on their backs. They stayed this way for a few minutes none of them saying a word until Alex broke the silence. "Just a reminder Mer, we are out of school now so none of us have anywhere to go. We can stay here all day and all night if you need us too."

"Speak for yourself Alex. My mom is making her spaghetti tonight and I don't want to miss it."

"Quiet George we are here for Mer." Izzie said as she turned her head to Meredith. "As long as you need us, we'll be here."

Christina turned her head to Meredith. "Barbie's right Mer, we are here for you and just so you know I hate you right now for making me say that." When Christina finished they fell into silence again.

Meredith was still staring at the ceiling. "There was…there was a…there was a baby." Meredith said almost in a whisper. All eyes went to Meredith but no one said anything. "I was pregnant with his baby. I didn't know. I thought I had the flu but I was pregnant. I'm just like my mother. I didn't even care for my own child. Four days ago I was pregnant and now…now I…I feel empty."

They were all silent again not knowing what to say. Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George all looked at each other daring one of them to speak first. Alex rolled his eyes. "Mer you are not your mother. Mer look at me please." Meredith turned her head to him. "You are not your mother. You have never been your mother and you never will be."

"How can you say that Alex? I didn't care for my child, I'm just like her."

Alex reached over and grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

"You're touching me."

"Shut up Christina." George, Izzie, and Alex all said. Alex continued. "I can say that because we know you Meredith. We know the real you remember? I also know you have a heart that's bigger than all of our hearts put together. And you have us. We would never let you be like her. And most importantly in the us is me and you know you can't resist me Grey." Alex said with a smile.

Derek, Addison, and Mark were standing at the door listening. Mark turned to Addison with a smile. "I think I like him."

"You would he sounds almost like you."

Next was Christina's turn. "Did you even know you were pregnant, really know?" Meredith shook her head with no hesitation. "This isn't your fault Mer. You always blame yourself when someone gets hurt but this isn't your fault."

Meredith laid her head on Christina's shoulder. "You're touching me, I don't do touching." George rolled his eyes and knew it was his turn. He reached over and grabbed Meredith's other hand. "Mer, we know you have been through a lot but this. You weren't ready for a child. I know you're hurting and I'm really sorry for that, we all are. But you weren't meant to have this baby. Besides you're two dark and twisty to have a child right now. We are all going away to college soon, we are going to become surgeons just like we have talked about for years and I believe that what happened was meant to happen and it is for the best."

"Bambi's right Mer."

"Alex quit calling George that. It's not nice."

"Christina started it."

"Shut up Evil Spawn what are you like five?"

"Look who's talking Crack Whore."

Meredith had turned her head to Izzie and smiled. It was a half hearted smile but it was a smile. Izzie leaned down and whispered in Meredith's ear. "You know the only way to shut them up. Are you up for it?" Meredith nodded and Izzie jumped off the bed. "I'll be right back."

Izzie paused at the door for a moment still hearing Christina, Alex, and George bantering back and forth. She saw Derek, Addison, and Mark standing there. She smiled at them seeing how much they cared for Meredith. She pointed out of the room and they made a path for her. She walked back to the kitchen with the other three following her. "It's time for the ice cream."

"What was that?"

"We've been doing it since we were little. Whenever one of us is hurting or whatever we all lay down next to that person until they talk. It's a rule. Most of the time it's Meredith. After she tells us what is on her mind Alex always starts, then Christina, then George, and I get the ice cream after they start their banter."

"Is she going to be ok?"

"It may take a few more days but she will come around she always does."

"Thank-you Izzie." Izzie smiled. Derek went to the freezer and turned back around feeling Izzie's gaze. "What."

"I can see it."

Derek looked at Mark and Addison and then back to Izzie shifting nervously on his feet. "What?"

"Mcdreamy, yeah I think Christina did good this time, it fits."

Mark and Addison started laughing and Derek blushed. Mark recovered. "Derek Sheppard is blushing."

Izzie turned around and looked at Mark. This time it was Mark's turn to shift. "What?"

"Mcsteamy."

There was silence except for Mark. "What?"

"Well Mcsteamy fits you just fine." Izzie smiled as she watched Mark blush.

Derek smiled as he pulled out the ice cream containers and placed them on the counter. "Now who's blushing Mark?"

"Shut up Mcdreamy."

"You shut up Mcstetamy."

Now Addison rolled her eyes. "Both of you shut up." Addison then turned to Izzie. "Did you really have to do that. How am I ever going to get them to shut up now?"

Izzie shrugged. "Sorry. Can I get some spoons?"

Addison walked to the drawer, pulled out five spoons, and handed them to Izzie.

"Coffee, Swirl, and Banana." Derek said as he set some bowls on the counter next to the ice cream. "Which one will Meredith eat?"

"The Coffee is for Alex, Swirl is for Christina, and Banana is for George. Meredith and I eat out of all of them. And we don't need bowl's just the spoons please." With that she grabbed the spoons and ice cream and headed back to the bedroom. "Ok who wants ice cream?"

They all sat up. Izzie handed them all spoons and handed the correct containers to Alex, Christina, and George. They happily opened them and started eating. It didn't take long before they finished off the containers. Meredith looked at each of her friends. "Thank-you."

"You don't have to thank us."

"I know but I just wanted you to know."

"Yeah so I renamed Mark."

"You can't rename him." Christina said.

Meredith elbowed her. "What to Izzie?"

"Mcsteamy. And just so you know he knows it too."

Meredith smiled. "Thanks Izzie. Now that's all Derek and Mark will talk about."

"So how is Mcdreamy?" Meredith didn't say anything so Christina continued. "Come on Mer tell us. I heard his voice when he called me. He cares about you. How do you feel?"

"He called you?" Christina nodded and Meredith blushed a little realizing that once again he knew what she needed.

"She's blushing." George pointed out.

"Bambi's right Grey, you're blushing."

"I don't blush."

"Yet again I am forced to agree with these fools. You are blushing."

"Ok I think you guys need to get going now. George didn't you say your mom was making dinner?"

"Oh yeah, come on you guys." George said standing up.

The rest followed. They walked to the living room and grabbed their coats. Derek, Mark, and Addison stood to see them off. They went to the door. George was the first one to give Meredith a hug before stepping out into the hall. Next Izzie gave her a hug. Then Alex and finally Christina. Meredith waved goodbye from the door and as she was closing the door she heard their voices again.

"Goodnight Addison, Goodnight Mcsteamy, Goodnight Mcdreamy."

Meredith closed the door and smiled. She turned around to face Derek, Addison, and Mark. She looked right to Derek. "Thank-you."

"I didn't do anything."

"You called Christina. Thank-you."

"I'll do anything to help you Meredith even call your crazy, scary friend." Derek smiled as Meredith gave him a hug.

When Derek let her go she gave Addison a hug. "I'm sorry I didn't say it before but thank-you Addison for being here and for helping me that night and the next day at the doctor, it means a lot." She heard Addison say you're welcome.

Next she hugged Mark. "Thank-you Mcsteamy."

"You're welcome Grey. You know Derek's right, you are pretty amazing."

Meredith stepped back and looked back to Derek. "So what is for supper?"

"You're hungry after eating all that ice cream?"

"That was only desert."

Mark headed to the kitchen with the others following. "I don't know how someone so tiny can eat so much."

"Fast metabolism. Shouldn't you know that being a doctor and all?"

Mark turned around and looked at Meredith. "Out."

"What?"

"You out of my kitchen. You are banned from the kitchen remember? Get out of my kitchen or you won't get anything to eat."

Meredith backed up and took a seat at the table as Addison and Derek laughed.

Slowly Meredith got back into her routine with Derek, Mark, and Addison. Derek and Mark took turns teaching her how to drive and when both of them were confident that she knew what she was doing Addison took her to get her license. The next day Mark was off and Meredith asked him to take her to buy a car. She bought a brand new Honda CRV because she wanted something so she could take her things with her to college but she didn't want something too big.

After another month of being just friends Derek wanted to start something more with Meredith. He took her to dinner just the two of them. As Addison helped her get ready she realized it was their first date. Dinner went well and when they came home Derek kissed her. It was the first time Derek had kissed her and it made her knees go weak. As soon as she felt that she pulled away from him scared at what her feelings meant. Meredith spoke to Addison on many different occasions about her feelings for Derek. She even spoke to Mark a few times. Both Mark and Addison had told her to talk to Derek but Meredith decided not to. Instead she just kept telling herself that they were only good friends.

Derek had spoke to Mark and Addison about his feelings for Meredith. He wanted to tell her but he knew she wasn't ready yet to hear what he wanted to say. Derek decided it was better to wait and just spend time with her so he kept quiet.

Summer was coming to an end. George was the first to leave for college. A week after he left Izzie left. Three days after that and Alex left. Christina was the last to leave .

Three days before Meredith was set to leave she knew she had to go to the hospital. She needed to say goodbye to Richard. That afternoon she went to the hospital. She stepped through the doors and stopped. She was scarred of seeing her mother again but she knew she needed to say goodbye. She put a smile on her face and walked to the nurses' station. She asked for Dr. Webber. The nurse told her he was in surgery so she made her way to the surgical floor. She smiled to herself wondering if it was a good idea or not. After a moment's hesitation she turned and headed to the gallery. She was surprised to find it empty so she took a seat. After sitting there for a few minutes the door opened and in walked Derek. He smiled when he realized she was there. "Fancy seeing you here."

"I came to say goodbye to Richard."

"Oh." He paused. Derek realized the day was coming but he still felt his heart stop for a moment at the thought of not seeing her every day. "You want to grab some lunch after?"

"Sure. What time is your break?"

"Well…" Derek looked down into the OR and then back at Meredith. "I'd say his surgery will be about another 30 minutes so I guess my break is in 45 minutes. How does that sound?"

Meredith smiled. "So I get 15 minutes with Richard." Derek nodded and Meredith continued. "I think that sounds good. I'll meet you in the lobby."

Derek got a page and left the room. After Richard finished his surgery Meredith left the gallery and went to say goodbye. She looked into the scrub room to tell Richard she was there when she saw the one thing she had never expected. She turned around and ran to the elevator. She pressed the button but it wasn't coming fast enough so she ran to the stairs. Once she reached the lobby she took a seat. She thought about leaving the hospital however she knew Derek would be there soon so she decided to wait. After a few minutes she heard some nurses talking as they were walking by.

"I can't believe he has a girlfriend. Are you sure they are together?"

"I walked in on them kissing in one of the on call rooms and their shirts were off. If I would have waited a little longer I might have seen more than just his chest."

"Oh that would have been nice. Who is she?"

"Wouldn't you like to know?"

"Stop it Nikki you have to tell me who Derek Sheppard's girlfriend is."

"Marissa Michaels. Her and Dr. Sheppard have been together for 6 months, they met at a grocery store."

"How do you know this?"

"Marissa. Her and I have been friends since high school. She told me she was seeing a hot doctor but she never told me who. After I caught them yesterday I made her tell me. She really loves him."

Meredith listened until she couldn't hear them anymore and then she got up and walked out of the hospital. She didn't look back when she heard Derek call her name. Meredith felt relief when she got back to the apartment knowing Derek, Mark, and Addison were each working a 48 hour shift. Meredith looked at her cell phone and saw she had missed a call from Derek. He had left a message stating he was going into surgery but he wanted to make sure she was alright since she stormed out of the hospital. Meredith called during his surgery so she knew she could just leave a message and she told him she was fine. That night Meredith packed the few belongings she had and loaded up her car. When she was done she decided to watch some TV and then she went to bed.

The day before she was to leave Derek, Mark, and Addison all had off. They spent the day together just being friends. That night they were set to go out for a nice dinner since it was their last dinner together. Mark and Addison left as soon as they were done eating. Meredith knew it was a set up just by looking at their faces. Meredith was upset because she didn't want to be alone with Derek. After they finished desert she told Derek she really wanted to get home so she could get a good night's sleep since she had to leave in the morning.

They got back to the apartment and Meredith went to open the door when Derek stopped her. "Mer you're leaving tomorrow."

Meredith turned to Derek. "I know, you can have your bed back."

"I want you to know that I'm really going to miss you."

"You'll forget about me and all my drama as soon as I'm gone."

"No Mer, no I won't. I want to tell you something."

Meredith saw the look in his eyes and it scarred her, all she wanted to do was run. "No Derek, I need to get some sleep."

Derek looked at her she looked scarred and he didn't understand why. "Actually Meredith I need to tell you something." He saw her turn back to the door so he reached out and turned her back to face him. "I love you." He said before leaning down and kissing her.

Meredith heard the words and she couldn't move she felt like a deer caught in the headlights. After a moment she heard him say it again and this woke her. She pulled back from him. "You can't love me."

Derek looked at her. "What?"

"You don't…You can't love me Derek. I'm just someone you felt sorry for. You let me stay with you for a few months. I am going to leave and you can go back to your old life." Meredith saw Derek was about to say something so she put her finger to his lips to silence him. "These last few months have been great. I don't know what I would have done if I didn't have you, Addi, and Mark. You all changed your busy lives to help me and I really appreciate that. I am going to leave tomorrow and you all are going to go back to the way your lives where before you ever met me and I am going to go to school just like I have planned for years."

Meredith paused and Derek took that moment to stop her. "We won't forget you Mer. I love you, I mean it. I have loved you from the moment I saw you sitting on that exam table months ago. You didn't even tell me your real name but yet we found each other."

"Derek."

"No Meredith you need to know this. Fate has brought us together and I'm not going to let you go. I love you." Derek went to kiss her again.

Meredith slapped him. "No Derek!" She quickly pushed the door open and walked into the apartment.

"Ouch!" Derek said as his hand went to his cheek and he followed Meredith into the apartment.

"I need to get some sleep goodnight Dr. Sheppard." Meredith didn't even say hi to Mark or Addison as she went to the bedroom and closed the door.

Derek sat up talking to Mark and Addison that night explaining what had happened.

That night Meredith cried herself to sleep. The next morning she got up quickly and got dressed. Derek, Mark, and Addison were all waiting for her. They ate breakfast and then they all walked her to her vehicle. Once they got to the car Mark pulled her into a hug and said goodbye. Addison was next to pull her into a hug. Meredith got tears in her eyes. She turned to Derek who pulled her into a hug. She closed her eyes wanting to remember everything about how it felt to be in his arms. She pulled away, got into the car, and rolled down the window. She started to drive away when she stopped the car. She put it in park and ran back to Derek. He opened his arms to her. "I love you Meredith."

Meredith pulled back and gently touched his face. "Derek I want you to promise me something."

"Anything."

"I want you to promise me that you will be happy."

Derek smiled. "I am happy."

Meredith kissed him on the cheek and then pulled back out of his arms. "I need you to be happy with Marissa, she loves you and she'll make you happy. Goodbye Dr. Sheppard." With that she ran back to her car and drove away without even looking back.

Meredith arrived at Dartmouth and immersed herself in classes. She did keep in touch with George, Izzie, Alex, Christina, and Addison. Every once in a while she would get an email from Mark but she didn't get anything from Derek. She was happy because she knew that this meant he kept his promise however she was also sad. After about 2 years she got a letter from her mother asking her to go back to Seattle during the summer because she needed to discuss something with her. Meredith decided it would be a good time to visit Addison so she agreed and sent the email to Addison. She also sent the letter to her mother.

_**Thank-you again for the reviews you are all Awesome!** I changed this chapter a little because once I started writing I couldn't stop. I hope the ending wasn't too rushed but I realized how much I wrote and decided I needed to stop. If you have time, please let me know what you think. Do you like, dislike, want it to stop whatever. **Thank-you for your support this far!**_


	8. Chapter 8

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 8

"Meredith, Meredith wait!" Derek called but her car was already too far gone.

Mark and Addison walked up to Derek and each took a spot next to Derek. Addison on his right, Mark on his left. Mark put his hand on Derek's shoulder before he spoke. "Let's go inside Derek, we have to get ready for work."

Addison looked at Derek's face. "She said she would write Derek. She'll be ok."

Derek heard them talking but he couldn't get her words out of his mind. He quickly turned and ran into the apartment. Addison and Mark shared a look and then followed him into the apartment. When they entered Derek was coming out of his room with a bag. Mark stepped in front of the door. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going after her."

Addison didn't understand what had gotten into him. She knew he would be upset when Meredith left, they all would be but going after her was not what she had expected. "Derek you can't go after her. She's going to school and you have a job." Addison watched as Derek didn't say anything so she turned to Mark and silently told him to help her.

"Derek Addi's right you can't just follow her. She will write and visit."

"She knows about Marissa."

"What?"

"That's what she came back for. She told me she wants me to be happy with Marissa because she loves me. She called me Dr. Sheppard and then ran away. I need to go after her and make her understand."

"You can't go after her Derek you know if she's running she won't talk to you right now."

Derek sighed and put his bag down before sitting heavily on the couch. "I don't understand how this happened. How did she find out about Marissa?"

"You didn't tell her?"

"No. I didn't think it was something I needed to tell her Addi." Derek saw the look on her face. "We were over a month before I met Meredith why would I need to tell her about an ex? Did either of you know that she knew?"

Both Mark and Addison shook their heads no.

"I just don't understand why she wouldn't have asked me about her if she knew and how did she find out?"

"Well we did all work that 48 hour shift a couple days ago so it's not like any of us got to spend much…"

"That's it." Derek cut Mark off and continued. "She came to say goodbye to Dr. Webber that day and we were going to have lunch but when I went to meet her she was leaving the hospital. I tried catching her but I got paged. I called her to make sure she was ok and then she called and left a message that she was fine. I should have known she wasn't fine."

"How does that explain anything?"

"When I left the lobby I saw nurse Nikki with another nurse. Nikki had walked in on Marissa and I the day before."

"Walked in on?"

"We were in an on call room talking. She said she wanted us to get back together because she missed me. I told her I loved someone else when she pulled me into a kiss. That's when Nikki walked in. When I got paged I saw that Nikki was talking to another nurse. Meredith must have overheard them talking. I have to tell her what happened."

"Derek you need to give her time. You know how the nurses talk and I'm sure what Meredith heard is not what you just said. Wait until she writes us." Addison saw Derek's expression hadn't changed. "You can't lose your job."

It was the 30 day of him going to the mailbox looking for a letter from her. Derek pulled out the mail and found a letter for him and one for Addison. He quickly went back to the apartment and threw the mail on the kitchen counter before going into his bedroom to read his letter. He quickly tore it open and began to read.

_Dear Derek,_

_I don't even know where to start. I want to tell you so many things but I know I can't. I want you to know that I am happy here. I am focusing on school. I told myself that I was going to be number one and prove my mother wrong and that is what I'm doing. I have a roommate. You probably wouldn't like her because she reminds me of Christina and I know how you feel about Christina but she keeps me focused. I miss you. I didn't want to tell you that but I do. I hope you are happy and keeping your promise. Maybe if I come back for a visit I can meet Marissa. I'm sorry I didn't get to meet her before I left but I'm sure you had your reasons. _

_I hope you're doing well at the hospital. I haven't heard from my mother. I know I shouldn't be surprised by that but I guess I was hoping that once she knew I was really gone maybe she would miss me. Don't let her get to you if she's being tough on you though. She's just wanting to push you and make you better. She was always a good doctor and a good teacher. I just wish she was a better mother. No actually I don't. I'm the way I am now because of her so I don't fault her for that because she did the best she could right? Anyways I just don't what you to get upset if she gets mad at you or anything._

_You believe in fate and happily ever after, I never did Derek. You said you loved me, I'll never forget that. I told you you couldn't and I was right about that. You can't love me because of Marissa. I'm so sorry that I disturbed your life with my problems. If I could go back I would have made Christina take me to Mercy the day I fell and broke my wrist. Since I can't go back, I want to thank-you for being there for me after Luke, the trial, and the baby. I know I could have gotten through it without you, Mark, and Addison but I'm glad I didn't have to. I still have the nightmares. I don't think they will ever go away so I'm learning how to deal with them on my own. _

_I didn't give you my address because I want you to forget me Derek. I want you to be happy and I'm not going to take that away from you. I didn't give it to Addison either so don't try bugging her for it. You told me you wanted to be a neurosurgeon and I want that for you. You will be a great neurosurgeon I just know it. And I want you to be happy. Make yourself happy Derek and know that I am fine just like I always have been and I will continue to be. I'll be fine._

_I know I was rambling but I just wanted to get everything out before I lost my nerve. I know you're laughing at me for that right? Keep that smile on your face Derek and take care of yourself._

_Meredith Grey_

Derek finished reading the letter and folded it back up. He couldn't believe what she had said. His heart was breaking. He didn't understand why she had pushed him away and why she wouldn't let him love her. He didn't want her to be on her own and he knew she wasn't fine but he knew he couldn't force her to do anything and he thought that running after her would make things worse. But she was right about the rambling and the smile. Even thought it hurt she could make him smile.

Mark and Addison came home and saw the mail on the counter. Addison sorted through it and found her letter. She went to the couch and started reading it.

_Dear Addison,_

_Well I'm here. It's better than I thought it would be. I have a roommate who reminds me of Christina and she's very competitive. I've decided to focus on school. I am going to prove my mother wrong and become a surgeon. _

_As you can see my email address is at the top of the letter. Please don't give it to Derek. I wrote him a letter asking him to forget about me and to be happy with Marissa. That's what is best for him Addison. I wouldn't be any good for him, he deserves so much more than me and I want him to have that. I don't want to lose our friendship though. I would understand if you can't because of Derek but I just wanted you to know that. He deserves your loyalty just make sure he becomes the great neurosurgeon that I know he will be._

_I also wanted to thank-you for everything you have done for me. I still have nightmares but I am learning how to deal with them on my own now that I don't have you, Mark, or Derek. It's not as hard as I thought it would be. I guess that's because I have been on my own for years. _

_Anyways, I gotta get to class but I wanted to say hi and give you my address. Just in case I don't hear from you again I want you to know that I really appreciate your help again. And Addi if I would have had a sister, I would have wanted her to be like you._

_Love,_

_Meredith_

_P.S. Say hi to Mark. I don't know what love is but I think he loves you and you too are good together so you better invite me to the wedding if he ever works up the nerve to ask you. _

Addison folded up the letter with tears in her eyes as Mark came to sit next to her. "Addi what is it?"

"It's from Meredith." She said handing it to Mark who read it over before folding it back up and placing it into the envelop.

"So Derek wants to be a neurosurgeon and she thinks I don't have the nerve."

"Mark."

"Right I'm sorry. It's not fair for her to make decisions for Derek."

"What do I do?"

"About what?"

"Derek."

"Talk to him." Mark saw the question on her face. "Don't tell him about the email but see if he would be ok with you keeping a friendship with her. I know you think of her as a sister to Addi and it wouldn't be right for you to forget about a sister, just talk to him."

"Thank-you Mark." Addison finished as she gave him a kiss. She then headed to Derek's room and knocked softly.

"Come in."

Addison walked in and took a seat next to him on the bed. "Did you get a letter from her?" She knew it was a dumb question because she saw the letter in his hand but she didn't know how else to start the conversation.

Derek didn't say anything he just handed her the letter giving her permission to read it.

Addison took the letter and read it. When she was done she folded it back up and handed it back to him. "I'm sorry Derek."

"I just don't understand why? Why did she ran away and why won't she let me love her?"

"Derek she doesn't know what love is." Derek looked at her with a confused look so Addison explained. "Her mother is Dr. Ellis Grey. She spends 99 of her time at the hospital. Meredith didn't have anyone to show her what love is. Her father left her when she was young. Her mother when she was around, yelled at her. Derek she put Meredith down for everything she did. Nothing was good enough for her. Then when Meredith starts dating all they want is to get her drunk and have sex with her. She meets one guy who tells her he loves her and he ends up hitting her, breaking her wrist, and raping her on her birthday. Then what happens…her mother testifies for her rapist. To top it all off she ends up having a miscarriage. She hasn't had anyone teach her what love is Derek."

"But I could have taught her. I told her I loved her the night before she left and when she ran back into my arms. I told her I loved her. Why wouldn't she let me show her?"

"I think she was scarred."

"Of me?"

"No of what you said and how you made her feel. Love is a scary thing Derek and to someone who has never felt it or only had bad things happen in the name of love it's even scarier."

"You know what she asked me the night she finally cried?" Derek asked as he looked to Addison who didn't say anything. "She asked me how I know what she needs and wants? I told her I just did but I wanted to tell her it was because I loved her. If I had said it sooner I would have had more time to teach her what love is. Why didn't I tell her sooner Addi?"

"Because you knew she wasn't ready to hear it. Because you do love her and you didn't want to hurt her."

"But I did anyway."

"I don't think you did Derek. I just think she needs to be on her own for a little bit."

"She's been on her own for 18 years already."

"She's been in the shadow of her mother and then she came to be with us. She's thousands of miles away from anyone who knows her or knows her past. Maybe this is just what she needs."

"She told me to forget her."

"I know Derek."

"I can't forget her, I won't."

"I know and I think that deep down she doesn't want you to either. Just see what happens."

"What did your letter say?"

"She said she wanted to stay in touch if I wanted to but…"

"But what?"

"But she said she would understand if I couldn't because of you. She said you deserve my loyalty and she wants me to make sure you become the great neurosurgeon that she knows you will be."

"She always thinks of everyone else before herself."

Addison smiled. "That's another thing you love about her isn't it?"

Derek nodded. "I think you should."

"Should what?"

"Stay in touch with her. She needs someone besides her crazy friends that she can trust. I know she thought of you like a sister and I don't think it would be fair if she lost that just because I'm jealous that she would rather speak to you than me."

"Derek Sheppard, I thought you didn't do jealous."

Both Addison and Derek turned to the door to see Mark standing there smiling. "I don't get jealous but with Meredith it's different."

"Whatever. So are we going to go eat?"

Addison looked from Mark to Derek. "Are you sure Derek?"

"On two conditions…you don't hurt me with all my questions about her and you have to tell me if something is wrong."

Addison smiled and nodded. "I can do that." Addison looked back to Mark. "We better get going before her gets grouchy, he's hungry."

"I don't get grouchy, I just have strong opinions." Mark said as he was walking to the door with Addison and Derek following. "So a neurosurgeon?"

"Yes. I decided after the craniotomy I was in on about a month ago. Have you guys decided anything yet?"

"I've got some idea's but I'm not sure yet." Mark said as the three of them walked out the door.

Addison did keep in touch with Meredith and Derek stayed true to his word about asking her about Meredith. He asked everyday to see if she had heard from her. Addison never got annoyed with him knowing how he felt about Meredith. Meredith always kept her emails simple. She never gave too much information to Addison which made her think maybe Meredith knew that she would tell Derek. About a year after Meredith left Addison got an email telling her Meredith had a boyfriend. She said his name was Brian. He was a Junior and he was going to school to be a lawyer. Addison hoped he was good for her but she knew the only one who was really good for Meredith was Derek even though she would never tell her that. Addison had tried asking more questions about Brian but Meredith never answered them. A year later and Addison got the email she had been hoping for. Meredith was coming back for a visit. Addison quickly replied saying that she could stay in their guest bedroom and that she couldn't wait to see her. The reply she got however was that Meredith would be staying with her mother. To say Addison, Mark, and Derek were shocked would be an understatement. When Meredith told Addison the dates she would be back she told Derek and Mark. She saw the disappointment on their faces since the chief had picked both of them to go to a medical conference in New York for that week so they would not be able to see her.

"Addison." Meredith said walking to the table.

Addison stood and gave her a hug. "It's good to see you."

They both sat down and Meredith realized they were at a table for two. "Where's Derek and Mark?"

"They are at a medical convention in New York." Addison saw the disappointed look on Meredith's face. "They both said to tell you hi and they hope you are doing well."

"Addi I know I haven't known Derek and Mark as long as you have but I'm sure they already know how I am because they have been pumping you for answers, am I right?"

"You are. Derek asks everyday if I've heard from you."

Meredith smiled. "I thought he would forget."

Addison grabbed her hand. "He won't forget Meredith. You know that."

Meredith looked to her hand that was still being held by Addison's. "He asked you?"

Addison smiled. "Yes about a month ago."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I wanted to tell you in person and when I got your email that you were coming I thought it could wait."

"That's great Addison. I'm so happy for you. When is the wedding? Are you going to have a big wedding? Are you…"

Addison held up her hand. "You're rambling Meredith."

"I'm sorry, I'm just so happy for you."

"Good because I wanted to ask you something."

"Sure what is it?"

"I was hoping you would be my maid of honor."

"What?"

Addison laughed at her expression. "You heard me I want you to be my maid of honor."

"I don't know what to say."

"Yes would be a good answer."

"Yes."

"That's great Meredith. I'm so happy."

"When is the wedding?"

"It's going to next May."

They spent the next hour talking about the wedding and how Mark had proposed. Once the subject of the wedding was covered Addison decided to move to a different subject. "So how is your mother?"

"She's good. She's going to travel for a few years so she wanted to let me know about her plans and we packed up the house."

"You spent this last week packing?"

"Yes she wanted everything packed up because there won't be anyone in the house. She might sell the house. She said she would let me know her final decision depending on how the traveling goes.

Addison knew Meredith didn't like talking about her mother so she changed the subject again. "So how is Brian?"

"Brian?"

"Your boyfriend."

"Oh yeah right. Well he's not my boyfriend. I caught him in bed with my neighbor so we aren't together anymore."

"I'm sorry Meredith."

"Don't be. I'm fine."

"You're the same old Meredith."

"What?"

"You and your fineness. You don't have to be fine all the time you know?"

"Addison please we were having a good time let's not do this ok?"

"You're right I don't want to fight with you Meredith."

"Good so tell me what's new at the hospital?"

"Nothing really. Your mom leaving is the biggest news. We were all shocked to know she was going to take time off."

"I guess she needed a break. So how are Derek and Marissa?"

Addison stiffened she didn't want to be the one to talk to Meredith about this but she knew she couldn't not answer her. Then she thought maybe it was time that Meredith knew the truth. "Marissa?"

"Don't play stupid Addison you know who I am talking about. Now spill."

"They aren't a couple Meredith."

"He promised me."

"What?"

"He promised me he would be happy with her."

"No he didn't." Meredith just starred at Addison. "You said that to him, you didn't let him answer, you didn't even let him explain. Why didn't you tell him you knew about her?"

"How is Mark doing?"

"No you don't Meredith Grey, you are not avoiding this. Marissa was someone that he had been seeing before he ever met you. He broke up with her a month before he met you."

Meredith's eyes were starting to get moist. "They why would he be having sex with her in an on call room?"

"He wasn't. She had kissed him and that's when the nurse walked in. Derek said she had come to try and get him back because she missed him so she kissed him. That's all it was."

"That's not what I heard."

"Meredith the nurses love gossip everything that ever happens in that hospital gets blown out of proportion. I wish you would have talked to Derek about it."

Meredith wiped her eyes before her tears fell. "I thought it would be better for him. The nurse said that Marissa loved him. Derek deserves someone who can love him. Addi that's not me."

"But it could be."

"No it can't be. I'm just…I'm…no it can't be Addison."

Addison watched Meredith. She looked so sad sitting there. What was she trying to say? She was about to ask when Meredith spoke again.

"I have to go. I'm glad we were able to get together and I can't wait for the wedding. Tell Derek and Mark hi for me ok?" Meredith said as she stood and gave Addison a hug before leaving the restaurant.

Addison sighed as she watched Meredith leave the restaurant. Two days later Mark and Derek got back home.

"Addison how did it go?"

Addison was on the couch watching TV when Derek came in with Mark following behind. He took a seat and she quickly sat up to answer his questions. "She's going to be my maid of honor. She was back to help her mom pack up the house because she will be traveling and Dr. Grey might sell the house. She wanted me to tell you both hi. She doesn't have a boyfriend anymore. He cheated on her. I told her about Marissa. I told her the truth about Marissa."

Mark had come in and taken a seat. "What happened?"

"I asked her why she didn't tell you she knew about Marissa. She said it would be better for you Derek. She heard one of the nurses say that Marissa loved you and she believes you deserve someone who can love you back."

"I know you meant well Addison. I'm glad she asked about me. That means something. And just so you know I would punch the bastard who cheated on her if I could." Derek said seriously and then he started smiling.

Addison and Mark shared a look before Mark spoke. "What are you smiling about?"

"Fate."

"So we are back to that. What is it that you have faith in now?"

"Your wedding."

"Our wedding?"

"You said she's going to be your maid of honor. That means she's coming back in a year. And since I'm you best man she is going to have to talk to me and even dance with me."

Addison smiled. "I hope your right Derek for both of your sakes."

The next few months passed by slowly. Addison and Meredith emailed back and forth almost every week working out the details of the wedding. Meredith was worried about her dress but Addison had been able to find the one she wanted Meredith to wear online and thankfully Meredith found a store close by that she could get the dress and get it fitted.

One month before the wedding Addison got an email from Meredith asking if she could bring a guest. Addison was a little surprised by this request so she replied back asking who it would be. She knew she would say yes but she thought it was weird that Meredith hadn't said anything before.

Meredith got the reply back from Addison asking her who she would be bringing. Meredith slightly panicked. How could she do this. She knew that she couldn't go if he couldn't come but she really wanted to be there for Addison. She decided it would be better to just tell the truth so after two weeks of thinking it over she sent the reply to Addison.

Addison came home and turned on her computer to check her email. She was worried that Meredith still hadn't responded knowing the wedding was two weeks away. As she was pulling up her email Mark came in. "Hey Addi, did Meredith reply?"

"Yeah she did let's see what she has to say." Addison opened the email and started reading it. She knew Mark was behind her reading it also. "Oh." Addison and Mark said together. They looked at each other. "What do I say Mark?"

"You need to tell her it's ok if she brings him."

"What about Derek?"

"I'll tell him. Just reply to her and let her know it's ok. Maybe after he meets Derek and I he'll run away from her."

"Mark!"

"What? He needs to know that her brother isn't going to let her get hurt again and well Derek…"

"Mark it's our wedding."

"Relax Addi, I'll keep my eye on Derek."

"What do you have to keep your eye on me for?" Derek asked from the doorway.

"Derek you're home."

"Yeah Mark said something about going out tonight. So what do you have to keep your eye on me for?"

Mark looked to Addison for advice. "You better tell him now so he has some time to get use to the idea."

"What do I have to get use to?"

"Meredith's coming and…"

Derek cut him off with a smile. "I know it's only two more weeks."

"Derek. Meredith is coming and she is bringing her boyfriend." Mark watched his friends face drop. "His name is Erin."

"Oh."

"Yeah that's what we said."

"Mark!"

"Sorry. Come on Derek, let's go out for some drinks."

Derek disappeared from the doorway and Mark leaned down to give Addison a kiss. "Don't let him get too drunk Mark, you either. You both have a 48 hour shift starting tomorrow."

"I know Addi, we'll be ok. I'll see you later."

Mark and Derek left the apartment as Addison sent her reply to Meredith.

The next two weeks went by quickly. Addison finished everything for the wedding she was so excited. She knew that Mark and Derek had planned something but she didn't know what it was. Her guess was that it had to do with Meredith and she only hoped that it wouldn't make things worse between Derek and Meredith or that it wouldn't ruin her wedding.

Meredith finished finals but she was nervous about seeing them again, really about seeing him again. She rushed to finish packing knowing that Erin was going to be there soon. She quickly zipped up her suitcase and after saying goodbye to her roommate she left her room. Erin was waiting for her and they made their way to the airport.

_**Once again thank-you for your reviews!** I promise things will get better for Meredith I just can't tell you exactly when. This chapter was a little hard for me to write, I'm not sure why but it was. I'm glad it's done and I hope it's not too bad. The next chapter Derek and Meredith are going to talk, I won't tell you how it will come out or what happens but I promise they will talk. I have one more thing planned for Meredith before she gets back to Seattle, maybe two but we will see what happens this next chapter when I start putting it on paper. Please remember if you have time, let me know what you think. **Thank-you again for your support this far!**_


	9. Chapter 9

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 9

Meredith and Erin were heading to the baggage area to get their luggage. She looked around wondering if Addison would be there to meet her.

"Meredith!"

Meredith turned quickly to see Addison running towards her. "Addi!"

Addison stopped in front of Meredith and gave her a hug. "I'm so glad you're here, we have so much to do."

Meredith smiled. "Addi calm down, your wedding is going to be perfect, you already told me everything is ready, tomorrow is the rehearsal dinner, then the wedding is…"

"Meredith stop your rambling, it's annoying." Erin said as he stepped beside Meredith and put his arm around her waist.

Addison dropped the smile from her face as she looked to Meredith who still had her smile.

"You're right honey I'm sorry." Meredith motioned to Addison. "This is Dr. Addison Montgomery, Addison this is Erin Wright my boyfriend."

Erin extended his hand to Addison who accepted and they shook hands. "Nice to meet you."

"You too." Addison said and then she turned her attention back to Meredith. "So how long have you two been together?"

Meredith ignored her question. "Is Mark with you?"

"No him and Derek had to work today. I was hoping we could all go out for dinner when they get off."

"Who's Derek?"

Meredith turned to Erin. "He's a friend. Him Mark and Addison all grew up together."

"Just a friend?"

Meredith nodded.

"I'm going to go get the rest of our bags." Erin said before he whispered into Meredith's ear. "I'm not hungry yet and we need to get to the hotel." Erin walked away as Meredith slightly nodded.

"I'm sorry Addi we need to get to the hotel. We will see you guys tomorrow at rehearsal and then the dinner. Is everyone already here?"

Addison had a look of disappointment on her face but she nodded to Meredith's question. "Yes George came in this morning, Alex and Izzie got in last night and Christina came in about an hour ago. We were really hoping to spend some time together. George, Alex, Izzie, and Christina all need to leave the day after the wedding so tonight is the only time we can all be together. How about you go to your hotel and rest a little until Derek and Mark get off and then we can all meet up?"

Meredith wanted to say yes but she knew she couldn't. "I'm sorry Addi but not tonight. Hey so have you guys decided on a honeymoon yet?"

Addison looked at Meredith and knew she wasn't going to change her mind but she was upset at the fact that it seemed that Erin was the one who had made the decision and not Meredith. "We decided to wait until our year anniversary and then take a honeymoon." Addison saw Meredith roll her eyes. "We couldn't get any more time off."

"Then why not wait and get married next year?"

"Because this was the week we could all get off at once and besides I wanted you to be here."

"Addi I could have come next year."

"I remember how busy I was in school and trust me this is the better option. And besides I didn't want to wait any longer." Addison finished with a smile as Erin came back to the two.

"That's it Meredith. We better go get our car."

"I can drop you guys if you like, I need to check on some last minute things anyway to make sure everything is ready for the dinner tomorrow and for the reception so I'm heading to the hotel anyways."

"Thanks but I reserved a car for us so there's no need. We better get going Meredith."

"Right." Meredith looked back to Addison. "So I'll see you tomorrow at the church right?"

Addison gave her a hug. "Yes don't forget 4pm and then dinner right after so business casual dress is fine. I want everyone to be comfortable and the restaurant isn't formal."

"Sounds good, bye Addi. And tell Derek and Mark hi."

Addison nodded as she watched Meredith and Erin walk away.

The next day was the rehearsal. Meredith and Erin walked into the church side-by-side talking.

"Who is he?"

"Who?"

"Luke."

"Erin please."

"You called out his name in your sleep. Tell me who he is."

"Not now Erin."

"You can't keep saying that." Erin stopped and grabbed Meredith's arm and turned her to face him. "I want to know Meredith. I want to know because I love you. You can't keep things from me now tell me who he is and why you are calling out his name in your sleep."

"I…I can't. I'm sorry Erin but I can't talk about him."

"Do you love him?"

"No."

"Then tell me." Erin said as he tightened his grip on her arm.

"Erin you're hurting me. Please don't do this now. I'm not ready to talk about him. Besides he's nobody to be concerned with. We need to get in there, we're late." Meredith leaned up to kiss Erin.

Erin pulled away from her. "No now tell me who Luke is."

Derek, Mark, Alex, and George had been walking out to get some air when they came upon Meredith and Erin. As they opened the door they heard Erin demanding to know who Luke was. All four men looked at each other before proceeding through the door to make their presence known. George was the first to speak. "Mer, you're here!"

Meredith turned to face the voice as Erin let go of her arm. "George, it's so good to see you."Meredith stepped forward and gave him a hug.

Alex cleared his throat. "Bambi gets a hug but what about me?"

Meredith turned to Alex. "Of course you do Alex, it's good to see you too."

"Alright you two, I'm the one getting married, I think I deserve a hug more than you two." Mark said with a smile and held out his arms.

Meredith turned to him and practically jumped into his arms. "Congratulations by the way."

"Thank-you. I guess I finally got the nerve."

Meredith laughed. "I figured she would show you that. But it still took what three years? Better late than never I guess."

"I just wanted to make sure we were ready. And I had to wait until I knew she would say yes." Mark finished with a smile.

"Whatever Mark you were still worried sick that she was going to say no." Derek said from beside Mark. "It's good to see you again Mer."

Meredith turned to Derek at hearing his voice and she gave him a smile. "It's good to see you again Derek." Meredith said as she hugged him. Immediately she remembered how good it felt to be in his arms and smell him by her. After a second she heard Erin clear his throat and she stepped back. She returned to Erin's side. "Sorry. Erin this is George, Alex, Mark, and Derek. Guys this is Erin, my boyfriend."

They all shook hands even though none of them wanted to acknowledge Erin they knew for Meredith's sake they needed to. After introductions were made they made their way into the church and after Meredith introduced the rest of her friends they started the rehearsal.

Meredith was standing with Derek waiting for the preacher to tell them it was there turn to go down the aisle when Derek turned to Meredith. "So what was that about?"

"What?"

"When we came out earlier."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"He was demanding you tell him who Luke was Meredith."

"It's none of your business Derek."

"It is if he's hurting you."

"He's not."

Derek was about to say something else when the preacher signaled for them to enter. Meredith and Derek made their way down the aisle. Derek was imagining it was his wedding while Meredith was wondering what it would feel like if it was her wedding. The rest of the rehearsal went without incident since Meredith made it a point not to be alone with Derek.

After the rehearsal was over they all headed to the restaurant.

Addison, Mark, Derek, Meredith, Erin, Christina, Izzie, Alex, George, Addison's parents and Mark's parents were all there. They were in a private room. They had placed their drink orders and the waitress had come back in to take their dinner orders. She had taken everyone's order but Meredith's.

"And what can I get for you dear?"

"I'll have the Fillet Minion with…"

Erin leaned into Meredith and lowered his voice. "You know you won't be able to go to the gym until we get back don't you think a salad would be better?"

Meredith smiled and slightly nodded. "I'm sorry I'd like to change that to a chicken salad please."

"Ok, is there anything else I can get for you?"

"No that's it, thank-you."

Derek was sitting next to Mark across from Meredith and he had heard what Erin had said. He fought the urge to say something. However when he looked at Mark he knew that Mark was feeling the same way. Derek also glanced across the table and caught Alex and George's eyes and he could tell they too were upset at what Erin had said.

The food came and everyone ate between different toasts to Addison and Mark. Erin did say a few other things that were upsetting Meredith's friends however no one said anything because Meredith seemed to laugh them off. Erin continued to order drink after drink. After desert Addison and Mark's parents left leaving the group of friends.

Derek had been watching and listening to Meredith and Erin through dinner and he wanted to punch the guy. He kept making snide comments to Meredith all night.

Addison had heard the comments and felt Mark beside her. When she looked over at Derek, she knew he was about to break. She leaned over to Mark. "Mark."

Mark looked over at Addison. "Yes Addi."

"I think you better take Derek out to cool down."

"What?"

"You heard me take him for a walk. Both of you need to cool down before he does something that he will regret in front of her."

"Fine." Mark said and then he turned his attention to Derek. "Derek let's go."

Derek looked at Mark like he had two heads. "Go where?"

"Addi said you need to cool down." Mark said as he looked back at Erin and Meredith before turning back to Derek. "And so do I. Let's go for a walk."

"Fine." Derek said as he and Mark stood and made their way to the door.

"Meredith we should get going to our room."

"Let's stay just a little longer please Erin I haven't had time to talk to my friends in a while."

"You know you need to get a good night's sleep or you will wake up looking like death itself and I don't want you walking down that aisle like that. Do you want to ruin your friend's wedding?"

"You're right. Let just finish our drinks and then we can go."

"That sounds good. I'm going to go make a call, I'll be right back." Erin stood and gave Meredith a kiss before leaving the room.

Erin was standing outside the restroom talking on his phone. "Hey I know it's late sorry. I just wanted to check in. No I haven't slept with her yet but it's coming. She's got me at this stupid rehearsal thing. I know but you know how chicks are at weddings besides, she's the maid of honor. Don't worry I didn't really see her as a challenge anyway but you and Brian said she would be so you know I'll make you both pay up. Yeah I've been drinking how else could I get through this? Don't worry no one can hear me I left her at the table, I needed a break from her and her stupid friends. Their all doctors or going to school to be doctors can you believe that? Yeah alright I'll call you later. Bye." Erin hung up his phone and made his way into the restroom.

George exited and headed back to the dining room where he went right up to Alex. "Where's Derek and Mark?"

"I don't know Bambi."

"Let's go find them."

"What…what has gotten into you?"

"I was in the restroom and…"

"Whoa way too much information." Alex said as he held up his hand.

"Shut up Alex. I was coming out and I heard Erin on the phone He's going to hurt Mer."

"Well he was being a jerk to her during dinner."

"Alex I'm serious. Let's go find Derek and Mark."

"Why do we need them?"

"Because they care about her as much as we do." George finished and they both got up and went looking for Derek and Mark.

Derek and Mark were walking back to the dining room. "Why does she keep settling for guys like that?"

"I don't know man but you have to keep your cool or you'll upset her. Plus if you ruin our wedding, Addison will never forgive you."

"I just don't get it. She deserves more."

"I know Derek but…" Mark was interrupted by George and Alex quickly walking up to them.

"There you guys are we have to do something before she gets hurt. I don't want her to get hurt by that…that."

Derek and Mark shared a look and then looked back at George. Derek turned to Alex. "What is he talking about?"

"Bambi overheard Erin on the phone and he thinks he's going to hurt Mer or something."

"What? George what did he say?"

George told Alex, Derek, and Mark everything that he heard Erin say while he was on the phone.

"I knew he was a jerk."

"You're not the only one. Did you hear him talking about her weight and her dress?"

"Bambi we were all sitting there, we all heard him."

"She didn't even act like she cared." Mark said as he looked to Derek who was leaning against the wall.

Derek had listened to George tell what he had overheard. He was slowly getting more and more upset with each word. He turned and punched the wall. "Damn it."

Alex and George turned to Derek and walked closer to him along with Mark.

"You know the wall didn't do anything wrong and it can't hit back."

Derek who was now clutching his throbbing hand smiled at Mark. "Yeah well this way Addi can't yell at you."

"And why would she yell at me, I didn't do anything wrong?"

"Because if I had hit who I wanted to hit he would end up in the hospital and knowing Mer she would be by his side so Addi wouldn't have a maid of honor tomorrow."

"And again why would she yell at me?"

"Because you wouldn't have stopped me so it would be your fault."

"My fault because you can't control your temper?"

"No your fault that you can't control yours because you would have helped me make sure he ended up in the hospital." Derek finished with a smile.

Mark chuckled. "You're probably right so what are we going to do?"

Derek, Mark, Alex, and George spent some time talking before heading back to the dining room. When they entered they took their seats and Mark had asked the waitress for some ice. When she brought it back in he handed it to Derek to put on his hand.

Addison saw him put the ice on his hand. "Derek what happened?"

"Nothing Addison."

"Derek are you ok?"

Derek looked up and saw Meredith's worried eyes on him. "It's ok Mer don't worry about it."

"Meredith we need to get going." Erin said as he stood and grabbed Meredith's hand. "Say goodnight so we can get some sleep." Erin finished with a small smile.

"You're right. Goodnight everyone. I'll see you all tomorrow." Meredith said as Erin was leading her out of the dining room and up to their room.

Once they were out of the room Derek turned to Mark and Addison. "I really don't like him."

To everyone's surprise Addison spoke up first. "Neither do I. So now tell me what really happened or are you." She paused pointing to Mark. "Are going to spend the night on the couch?"

Mark had a look of surprise on his face. "You wouldn't?"

"If either of you do something to ruin my wedding or hurt her I would now spill."

"Dude you better tell her."

""What is Alex talking about?"

"Fine." Derek said as he started telling about what George had said and what had happened in the hallway.

The next day was the wedding. Addison, Meredith, Christina, and Izzie all met for breakfast and then they went and got their hair and make-up done. Once they were done they all headed to the church to finish getting dressed.

Mark, Derek, Alex and George all met up for breakfast as well and then they too went to the church to get ready.

Meredith, Christina, and Izzie were all dressed and were helping Addison get dressed. "Addison you look beautiful."

"Thank-you Izzie."

Christina noticed the look on Meredith's face and decided to give them some time alone. "Come on Barbie let's go check on the guys and see if they are almost ready." Izzie nodded and followed Christina out.

"Addison are you sure about this?"

"Of course I am It's Mark."

Meredith smiled. "That's why I am asking. Don't get me wrong Mark's a great guy but are you really sure you want to marry him?"

"I love him Meredith and he loves me. Yes I want to marry him."

"I just want you to be happy."

Addison turned from the mirror and took a seat next to Meredith. "I am happy. Mark and I have been together for so many years it already feels like we're married, this is just making it official. Thank-you Meredith."

"For what?"

"For being here. You've been like a sister to me and I wouldn't want to do this without you by my side."

"I wouldn't be anywhere else." Meredith said as she gave her a hug.

"Are you ok?" Addison asked as she pulled away from Meredith. She noticed Meredith held her just a little longer and tighter than their usual hugs.

"I'm fine."

"Spill." Addison said. "I have known you long enough to know that when you say you are fine you are defiantly not fine so spill."

"It's just, seeing Derek again. I miss him Addi. I have since the day I left. I want him to be happy and I really think he can't be with me but I miss talking to him, I miss out friendship. I don't know what to do."

"He misses you too. He asks about you every day. Why don't you talk to him?"

"Because he wants more than I can give." Meredith paused a second before continuing knowing Addison needed an explanation. "He said he loved me and I don't love him, I can't. I don't want him to think we could be more than just friends."

"Do you love Erin?"

"He said he loves me. I care for him but I can't say I love him, not yet."

"I think you need to spend more time with us."

"What?"

"I know you want to be the best in your class but I think from now on you need to let yourself have some fun. You can come back on breaks and holidays. I think it will do us all good to spend time together, we've missed you too."

As Addison finished Christina and Izzie were coming back into the room. Meredith turned back to Addison. "Maybe you're right."

"Ok the guys are ready and everyone has taken their seats. Are you ready Addison?"

Addison nodded and stood. "Let's go."

They all walked out and took their places. The wedding started and went beautifully. Once it was done they all headed to the hotel for the reception.

All through dinner Erin kept ordering drink after drink. Meredith realized he was getting drunk and she was starting to get a little embarrassed because he was getting loud.

After everyone was done eating Derek and Meredith both made toasts to the happy couple and then the DJ started to play. Mark and Addison had their first dance.

After the song was over Mark and Addison signaled to the rest of their wedding party letting them know it was their turn to dance with them. Alex and Christina danced together, Izzie and George danced together, and then Meredith and Derek were together.

Derek led Meredith onto the dance floor and held her close. "I saw you tear up during the ceremony."

"So I tear up at weddings."

"I miss you."

"Derek please let's just get through this dance for Addi and Mark."

"I am dancing but while we are dancing you are going to listen to me."

"Derek."

"If you walk away from me now Addi will never forgive you so just keep dancing and listen to me. I know I scared you by telling you I loved you and I'm sorry for that but I won't take it back. I do love you and I miss you. I miss talking to you, I miss going to the movies with you, I miss going to dinner with you, I miss spending time with you. I miss our friendship. You opened up to me when you were living with us and I'd like to think that it's because you felt something for me, that you trusted me. I know you know the truth about Marissa, Addison told me she told you."

"I'm sorry about that."

"Don't be sorry Mer. I just want you back in my life."

"I can't give you what you want."

"What?"

"I can't love you."

"Why?"

"Because I don't want to be hurt. Love hurts people Derek and I'm tired of being hurt and I don't want to hurt you."

"Addison and Mark don't look hurt." Derek said looking at Addison and Mark who were also dancing.

"Derek please."

"Mer have I ever asked you to love me?"

"No but you said you loved me and I just can't say that to you. You need someone to love you Derek, you deserve that and…"

Derek cut her off with a laugh. "You are so cute when you ramble." Meredith frowned. "I am not going to ask you for something you can't give me Mer. I just want whatever you can give."

"Really?"

Derek nodded and smiled down at her. He felt like he had maybe broken down some of her walls and he didn't want to push her away so he changed the subject. "What is up with Erin?"

"He's my boyfriend."

"He's a jerk."

"You don't know him."

"I know enough."

"You just met him. He's a good guy and he takes care of me."

"He's overbearing and he puts you down. You deserve better. He is going to hurt you."

"Get your hands off my girlfriend." Erin said as he grabbed Meredith away from Derek.

"Erin what are you doing?"

"The song ended two minutes ago and you two are still out here groping each other. It's sick, you are suppose to be with me."

Meredith knew Erin was drunk but she also noticed everyone staring at the three of them still on the dance floor. "I am with you Erin. I'm sorry. Let's go get some air." Meredith pulled Erin away from Derek and started for the door.

Mark and Addison had made their way to Derek. "What was that about?"

"I have no idea." Derek answered as they heard Erin's raised voice.

"Who is he?"

"That was Derek. He's Mark's best friend."

"Not him, Luke. Who is he?"

As soon as Derek heard the name he took off for the door. Mark and Addison were right behind him. Christina, Izzie, Alex, and George all followed also hearing Erin's words. They excited the reception and followed the voices. They ended up outside the hotel on a patio. They all saw Erin holding Meredith by the arm.

"Who is he Meredith?"

"Erin he's nobody, just calm down so we can go back in and dance ok?"

"Ok, no it's not ok. You have been leading me on for 2 weeks now. You let me kiss you and touch you but when I am ready to finally be with you to have sex with you, you push me away saying you can't. Then you call his name in your sleep."

Meredith looked at him horrified.

"Don't act stupid. You have been leading me on. Is this some game? Do you get a joy out of seeing me naked only to push me away?" Erin said as he let go of Meredith.

"Erin it's not like that."

"I told you I love you and you still won't give yourself to me and you keep calling his name. I deserve to know who he is."

"He's no one. Let's go to our room ok?"

"Why so you can just make a fool of me?"

"No. I'm sorry. How about you get me a few drinks and then we can go to our room. I'll show you it's not like that."

"Why now, what makes this time different than the rest?"

"Because I Lo…" Meredith started but couldn't finish the word. "I don't want to hurt you, I can show you please Erin."

"Tell me who he is."

"I can't."

"Did you love him?"

"I thought I did."

"Did he sleep with you?" Erin looked at her but she didn't say anything. "Did he?"

"Yes." Meredith whispered.

"You slut. I'm leaving."

"No Erin, it's not like that. Please don't leave me Erin." Meredith said grabbing his arm as he went to walk past her.

"Don't touch me, you deserve to be alone." Erin said as he pushed her away from him.

Meredith fell backwards and landed on the ground. She had tears in her eyes.

As soon as Erin pushed her away, Derek, Mark, Alex, and George were in his face. Derek seethed through clenched teeth. "You have no right to call her that or to lay a hand on her."

"She's my girlfriend I can do what I want. Besides she can't take care of herself she needs to be told what to do."

"You are a jerk." George said.

"She's a slut, she…"

Before he could finish Derek's fist connected with Erin's cheek. "You need to leave before I do more than just that."

Erin went to say something but Mark and Alex moved in front of Derek. "He's not the only one that would be willing to kick your ass."

"Alex it's my wedding which means since I couldn't get the first one, I get the second punch." Mark said with a smile as Erin started to leave.

"Fine I'm gone. I'll leave your stuff in the room and go catch a flight tonight. I should have known that since you were in the bar by yourself there was a reason for it. Don't bother calling."

"Don't worry she won't, and if you ever come near her again you better make sure you disappear or I'll come find you myself. Now get out of our sight before I forget that I'm in a dress and I kick your ass." Christina said.

Addison had went immediately to Meredith who was still on the ground. "Are you ok?"

"I'm fine. I'm really sorry about this Addi. I didn't think he would be like that. I wouldn't have brought him. I'm really sorry."

"Meredith, it's ok. He's gone now don't worry about him." Addison said as she started to wipe away Meredith's tears. "I just want you to be ok."

"I guess I look pretty awful."

"You look beautiful." Derek said as he kneeled down in front of Meredith.

Mark came over and helped Addison up as Derek helped Meredith up. "We better get back. Are you going to be ok Mer?"

Meredith nodded. "Just give me a couple minutes and I'll be right in."

Addison nodded as she and Mark started back into the hotel. They stopped in front of the rest of their friends. "Come on you guys. Derek's with her and you know he will make sure she's ok." They all turned and left Derek and Meredith.

"You were going to get drunk to sleep with him just so he wouldn't leave you."

"Derek I really don't want to talk about that right now."

Derek decided it was better to let it go. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"Yeah I guess you were right about him."

"I'm sorry about that too."

"No you're not."

"Excuse me?"

"You like being right, actually you love being right." Meredith smiled. "You know it makes me mad when you are right all the time."

"I like when you're mad. You're really cute when you're mad, or frustrated, or embarrassed, or…"

"Derek."

"I miss this, us like this, your friendship."

"I do too."

"Maybe we should do something about that."

"Like what?"

"Give me your address."

"What…no…why?"

"So I can come visit you and write of course. We can be friends Mer I don't want to lose that again."

"I will give you my email address but not my actual address, I don't want you visiting and distracting me. And maybe I can come back for holidays or something but I don't want you taking extra time off for me. Ok?"

"Ok, no extra time off. So friends?" Derek asked even though he knew he wouldn't be really happy until she would let him love her as more than friends. He smiled thinking that the best of relationships, the one's that last forever start with a good friendship.

"Friends." Meredith said after smiling.

They both walked back into the reception and enjoyed the rest of the evening. Meredith actually felt happy to be with everyone again.

Derek couldn't remove the smile from his face. Mark walked up to him. "So you're back?"

"What?"

"The smile, it's just like the one you had when you first met her. It's back."

"I guess it is."

"Are you two together now?"

"Mark she just broke up with her boyfriend." Addison said as she joined the two friends.

"That doesn't mean anything Addi."

"We're friends."

Mark raised his eyebrows. "Friends with benefits."

"No just friends."

"And you're ok with that?"

"Mark."

"Don't Mark me Addi he loves her. No man who is in love with someone is ok with just being friends."

"We started as friends and look where we are now."

"Thank-you Addi. That is exactly why I am perfectly ok with being friends. She agreed to give me her email address and she said she would visit more."

"Really?" Addison asked.

"Really. She doesn't know it yet but our friendship is going to lead to more."

"How can you be so sure Derek? Maybe she isn't meant to be more than just friends with you."

Derek went to respond when Mark put his hand up. "I got this one Derek." Mark then turned to Addison. "Faith."

"I should have known." Addison smiled.

"Look at her. She looks so happy." Derek said as the three of them were watching Meredith dance with Christina, Izzie, Alex, and George.

"I think she is now."

Mark laughed. "I'm glad we didn't have to follow through with your stupid plan."

"What plan?"

Derek looked at Mark as Mark shrugged his shoulders.

"What plan Derek?"

"I was just going to make her talk to me."

"How?" Addison asked as she looked from Derek to Mark. "Mark if you don't tell me you'll be sleeping on the couch."

"Are you going to use that threat forever?"

"Anytime I need to now one of you tell me."

Derek sighed and decided to tell her. "I told Mark I would sneak away and go up to the roof. After a few minutes I told him he should bring her up there and then close the door after he would go back into the hotel." Derek stopped and looked at Addison who had a question on her face. "The door only opens from the inside so we would be stuck on the roof. I figured if there was nowhere for her to go she would have to talk to me and then we could work things out."

"And how were you going to get back inside?"

"I made sure my cell phone was charged so I could call Mark when we were done and he would come back to open the door." Derek finished with a smile. "Don't look at me like that Addi. You know she only talks, really talks when you make her."

Addison smiled. "I know you're right Derek. I'm just glad it was your plan and not his." Addison said as she signaled to Mark.

"Wait you would have approved of this? I can't believe it, if this was my idea you would be mad."

"You're right Mark because if it was your idea it would have involved a hot tub or pool or something."

Mark smiled. "You liked the hot tub."

Addison hit his arm as Derek looked at the two of them. "When was this, I don't remember you telling me about this."

Mark went to answer but Addison cut him off. "Don't you dare, remember that couch?"

Mark leaned over to Derek as Addison turned away from them. "I'll tell you later." Derek nodded and Mark put his arms around Addison. "I hope you both realize that if those five do what they say and become interns at Seattle Grace we are going to have our hands full."

The three of them shared a laugh before Addison spoke. "I think for the first time in a long time you are right Mark."

"I'm right a lot of times Addi"

"Mark you better watch it."

"I think I can handle my wife Derek."

"Handle?"

"I meant I love you Addi my dear wife."

"You better. Now are you too going to join us or are you going to stand here all night?" Addison asked as she headed onto the dance floor to join Meredith, Christina, Izzie, Alex, and George.

Derek and Mark looked at each other and quickly followed her. And they all spent the rest of the night dancing and talking.

The next day everyone went to the airport to see each other off. George was the first to leave. Next was Izzie and Alex. Christina was next and finally was Meredith.

"Goodbye Mer."

"Goodbye Mark, you better take good care of her now that it's official."

"I will, don't be a stranger."

Meredith gave him a hug and then turned to Addison who had tears in her eyes. "No crying Addi."

"I can't help it. I'm going to miss you."

"It won't be like before Addi." Meredith paused and looked to Derek then back to Addison. "I'll write and call and visit this time, I promise."

"You better." Addison said as she pulled Meredith into a hug.

Meredith stepped away from Addison and Derek came up to her. "I'm going to hold you to your promise."

"I will. I don't want to lose my friends."

"That's good to know. Have a safe flight and call when you get back." He watched Meredith roll her eyes. "I just want to make sure you're safe."

Meredith smiled and gave him a hug. She then heard her flight was boarding so she said a quick goodbye to them again and boarded her flight.

From then on Meredith did stay in touch. Derek and her emailed almost every day. She would talk about her roommate and school. Derek would tell her about his days at the hospital. She was happy to have his friendship again and it didn't feel strange. On the weekends they would spend hours talking if Derek wasn't on call.

Addison and Mark also kept in touch with Meredith. She was happy to know that their marriage was working out and it gave her hope that marriage doesn't always end in divorce.

Christina, Izzie, Alex, and George all kept in touch with Meredith as well. They were constantly emailing and calling each other talking about their test scores and labs.

Meredith did go back to Seattle many times to visit. She spent all her time with Derek, Addison, and Mark. One of her visits she found out that Derek had decided to become a neurosurgeon. Mark said he was going into plastics and Addison was going into neonatal. Meredith wasn't surprised at the information.

Derek, Mark, and Addison also told Meredith about their interns when they were residents. Mark had the best stories since he was the hardest. She found out about Dr. Bailey who apparently Derek was a little afraid of.

One day she got an email from Derek telling her that Dr. Richard Webber had become Chief of surgery at Seattle Grace. Meredith didn't realize it at first but it bothered her more than she cared to admit. She tried not to let Derek know that it bothered her so she had emailed him back stating that she wouldn't be able to talk to him because he classes were keeping her really busy. She didn't want to push him away but she didn't want to discuss it with him either.

After some more time passed Meredith did get over the news of the new chief and she did go back to talking to Derek. After what felt like forever Meredith finally was preparing for graduation and Derek, Addison, and Mark became attending.

It came time to apply for internships. Meredith applied for Seattle Grace remembering her promise to her friends but she also applied for an internship in New York. Remembering who the chief was at Seattle and thinking it would be weird working under Derek, Addison, and Mark she hoped she would get excepted to New York. She was accepted into both. She knew she would be hurting all her friends but she decided she wanted to go to New York thinking she could start fresh so to speak. She sent the email to Derek, Addison, Mark, Christina, Izzie, Alex, and George all at the same time and turned off her phone not wanting to talk to them about it.

She was ready to go to New York when she received a call from her mother who came the next day for a visit. It was the first time she had seen her mother in years.

After her mother's visit Meredith realized what she had to do…she was going back to Seattle.

_**Thank-you, thank-you, thank-you for your reviews!** So she's going back to Seattle. Remember the others don't know that she's coming because the last time she contacted them was in the email that she sent telling them she was going to New York. So Derek and Meredith talked…it didn't go quite like what I had planned. When I put it down on paper I realized it was too early for what I had planned so it will either be in the next chapter or the one after that because I wanted them to build their friendship more which they did. Who knows depending on your reviews I might change it anyways so please remember, if you have time, let me know what you think. **Thank-you again!**_


	10. Chapter 10

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 10

"Alex are you ready?"

"I'm coming Nancy I just want to make sure I have everything."

"I can't believe you're going back to Seattle. You told me it was better to go to New York remind me again why you're going back there."

"There's nothing to remind you of, I never told you in the first place. Remind me again why you insisted on coming with me."

Nancy smiled. "I never get anything past you. I'm going to help you with your stuff, make sure you are settled, check out the hospital, and visit my brother and some old friends that I haven't heard from in a while."

"You don't need to make sure I'm settled but I appreciate it. Why haven't you told me your brother is in Seattle before?"

"You never asked. No changing the subject. Why are you going to do your internship there?"

"I have responsibilities I need to take care of and that is all I'm telling you."

"What about your friends? You said you told them you were going to New York."

"I did. I'll see them at the hospital." Meredith saw Nancy with her eyebrows raised. "He'll be there to. He's just a friend Nancy, nothing else. We've had this discussion he can't be more than a friend."

"So I finally get to meet Mcdreamy."

"I don't think you need to meet him."

"Oh I think I do. You talk about him all the time."

"We'll see."

"Alex what about what you've been running from since you started school?"

"I'm not running from anything."

"I've been your roommate since we were freshman. I've been here almost every night, your nightmares haven't stopped and they always got worse when you came back from Seattle."

"We need to go."

"Fine but you know this conversation is not over. We have the entire drive to Seattle so if you think you're getting out of it you're wrong." Nancy said walking out the door.

"When are you going to New York?"

"I haven't made any plans. I don't start my internship for 2 months so maybe I'll just stay with you until you kick me out."

"If you have friends and family in Seattle why didn't you ever demand on coming with me when I visited before?"

"Because I didn't want to tag along then. I've seen my brother on holidays with the rest of the family so don't look at me like that. I figured it was time I saw what his life was like in Seattle and maybe meet his girlfriend."

"He has a girlfriend and you've never met her, didn't he bring her with on one of those visits during the holidays?"

"No and it's really annoying because for as much as he talks about her we should have met her already. Anyway that's why I'm going to see him."

Meredith laughed at how frustrated Nancy looked.

"Stop laughing it's not funny he says he's going to marry her and we've never even met her. You know you kind of remind me of her."

"How?"

"Let's see, you are stubborn, quiet, avoid things, secretive, pig headed, and…"

"Are you done? It sounds like you don't like her."

"If she makes my brother happy that's all I care about." Nancy said as she looked over at Alex who had a weird expression on her face. "What?"

"I don't avoid and I'm not secretive."

"What's your Mcdreamy's name, and what are the nightmares about?" Nancy asked however Alex continued to stare at the road. "That's what I thought."

Nancy and Meredith took turns driving to Seattle. When they finally got to the city Meredith took over and she drove them to her house.

"Wow, this is your house?"

"It was my mothers."

"I'm sorry."

"What?"

"You said was."

"No she's not, she' um she's traveling."

"Oh, so is it ok if I stay here?"

"Of course. Are you going to go to your brothers tomorrow?"

"Yeah, I'll call him in the morning. What about you?"

"I have some things to take care of."

"You must have a lot to do since you came back 2 months before you're expected to start."

"Yeah I guess I do. Well I'm going to get some sleep, come on I'll show you where you can sleep." Meredith said leading Nancy up the stairs.

The next morning Meredith got up and got ready. When she came down stairs Nancy was already up and had made coffee. "Thanks."

"You're welcome. So are we going to go out tonight?"

"I thought you were going to be with your brother?"

"I am but he's got to work tonight so I'll need something to do." Nancy said with a smile.

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Fine we can do something when I get back. Do you need me to drop you somewhere?"

"No I'm going to call a cab in a couple hours. Thanks anyway, I'll see you later."

The day went by quickly. Meredith visited her mother and made sure she was ok. After she went home and found Nancy waiting for her. "Just like old times."

"I know. I'm going to miss seeing you every night."

"I think you'll be just fine in New York."

"I know but I'll still miss my roommate."

Meredith smiled. "I knew you liked me. Let's go. I know a great Italian restaurant."

They went to the restaurant and had dinner. When they were done they went to a movie and then went home and went to bed.

The next morning Meredith woke up to Nancy standing beside her bed. "What are you doing?"

"Waiting for you to get up. I want to go shopping and you can show me the sights."

"Isn't that what your brother or friends are for, you should be spending time with them."

"I'm meeting them for dinner, you are coming too."

"I'm not meeting your brother and I'm not getting up."

"Why not?"

"Because he's your brother and I have a feeling."

"A feeling?" Nancy asked ignoring the part about her brother.

"Yeah like something bad is going to happen so I'm going to stay in bed."

"Alex if you think I am going to let you stay in bed all day you are crazy."

"Nancy not today." Meredith said as she rolled over and pulled the blanket up over her head.

"Alex it is sunny out right now and from what you and my brother have told me about this city that is a rare occurrence so you need to get your butt out of this bed now." Nancy jumped up on the bed and pulled the blanket off as she started jumping. "Get up, get up, get up."

Meredith stood up and glared at Nancy. "You are just like my friend Christina."

"Which one is she?"

"Crack Whore."

"I like her already, now get your butt dressed so we can go."

Meredith took off to the bathroom and got ready to go.

Meredith and Nancy went for breakfast and then headed to the mall. Nancy decided she wanted to start at the end of the mall they had entered from which was by the movie theaters and work their way down. Then they would come back on the other side making sure to go into each store. Meredith rolled her eyes but followed Nancy.

"Are there any nice jewelry stores around?" Nancy asked as they left the mall.

"Jewelry?"

"Yes, I want to look at jewelry."

Meredith rolled her eyes. "Isn't it suppose to be the man's job to pick out the ring and don't you actually need a man before picking out the ring?"

"Technically yes but you know I like to keep up to date on what is in."

"Fine, there is one right up the road here." Meredith drove for a few blocks before turning into the parking lot.

Both women got out, entered the store, and started looking around. Nancy noticed her friend was acting a little nervous. "You've been checking over your shoulder since we entered the mall and you are still acting weird."

"I feel like someone is watching us."

Nancy laughed. "Is this the bad feeling?"

"Nancy please don't laugh at me I'm serious about the feeling. Can we just go back to the house?"

"After we are done looking."

Meredith nodded and continued to follow her around the store. About 15 minutes later she heard the bell sound above the door. Meredith raised her eyes to see who had entered and her breath caught as she locked eyes with the one person she had hoped to never see again.

He had heard from her mother she was coming back so he had been waiting for her. Every day he would drive by her house hoping to see her. The day before he finally saw her when he had drove by. She was walking to her car as if she didn't have a care in the world and it made him angry. That night he went home got a few things and drove back to her street and decided to wait for the perfect time to confront her. He had seen the girl with her but he didn't care. The next day he followed as they went for breakfast and then to the mall. He watched as they went in and out of the different stores. She still acted as if nothing was wrong as if the last 5 years never happened. He followed them as they left the mall and when she drove to the jewelry store he knew that was the perfect time since the store was all but deserted of customers. He watched them walk in and waited for 15 minutes before he decided it was time for her to pay for the last 5 years.

Meredith froze she knew she would have to face him again but she didn't think it would be now and certainly not in this place. She quickly looked around the store wanting to know where everyone was. She saw the look in his eye and knew he was upset. "What are you doing here?" She asked as he stopped in front of her. Nancy looked up confused by her friends shaky voice.

"I've been waiting for you. Your mother told me you were coming back to Seattle for your internship. So you did go to medical school after all?"

"Yes."

"Well I'm glad one of us got to do what we had planned. You know I've been thinking about you for 5 years?"

"I need to go, Nancy we need to go." She said as she grabbed Nancy's arm.

"You're not going anywhere." He said as he pulled his jacket back to reveal the gun he had.

Just as Meredith saw the gun she heard Nancy gasp and the sales associate let out a small scream. All Meredith could think about was getting Nancy out of the store. "What do you want Luke?"

"Want do I want? I want the last five years back. I want to be getting ready for my internship, I want for my parents to be back together." He paused as he saw the look on Meredith's face so he explained. "They got a divorce. Dad couldn't take the shame of having a son in prison. I want you to pay for what you did to my family and to me."

"I didn't do anything Luke."

"You told them I raped you."

Nancy turned to look at her friend and saw the scarred look in her face.

"You did."

"You wanted it just as much as I did. You let everyone else have a piece of you and it was my turn, it's not my fault you like it rough."

"No one else had a piece of me. Those were rumors, I hadn't been with anyone else. You took what you wanted and you hurt me, you got what you deserved."

Luke raised his hand and slapped her. Nancy cried as she saw her friend get hit.

Meredith quickly recovered still remembering what it felt like to be hit. "Let her leave Luke this is between you and me."

"She's not going anywhere. I want you to pay for what you did."

Meredith turned around and looked right into Luke's eyes. "You can do what you want to me but Nancy and the young woman behind that counter are not part of this just let them go."

"You can be sure I will do what I want to you but first I want all your money." Luke said as he turned to the sales associate and grabbed Nancy. He pulled her to his body and pointed the gun to her head. "Now or she is going to die and you will be next."

Nancy had tears rolling down her face as she looked to Alex.

The sales associate quickly opened the register and took out all the money that was in it. She placed it in a bag and placed it on the counter. "This is all there is. The rest is in a time lock safe, I can't get in."

Meredith quickly grabbed the bag. "Let her go Luke and I'll give it to you."

"You are in no position to tell me what to do. Give it to me."

"So you can kill us anyway. No you let her go and then I'll give you the money so you can go."

Nancy struggled as her friend talked to this Luke man. She had turned around in his arms and was continuing to struggle.

Luke looked Meredith in the eyes and saw how determined she was. He then looked back at her friend who was struggling with him. He realized he wanted Meredith so he raised his gun and brought it down hitting Nancy in the head. She stumbled back and Meredith caught her. "Nancy are you ok?"

Nancy was dazed but she quickly recovered from the blow and straightened herself out.

"Give me the money."

Meredith threw it to him and he caught it. He then pointed the gun on Meredith.

"Now it's time for you to pay."

"What do you want?" Meredith asked as she stepped away from Nancy who was now leaning against the counter.

"Your coming with me."

"I'm not going anywhere with you."

"Have it your way." Luke said as he pointed the gun on Nancy and fired.

Meredith jumped in front of Nancy as she immediately felt the sting in her chest. After she felt the impact of the bullet she saw the counter getting closer and within seconds she felt her head hit the edge before she felt the ground. She heard screams as she felt the blackness pulling on her.

Luke saw Meredith lunge in front of her friend right after he pulled the trigger. He then saw the blood and as she crumbled to the ground he panicked. He heard the screams and immediately ran out the door and took off.

Nancy screamed as soon as the gun went off waiting for the impact of the bullet. She then looked down and saw Alex laying on the ground and she could see the blood coming out of her chest. She screamed to the other women to call the police as she kneeled next to her friend. She rolled Alex over and immediately placed her hands on the wound to try and stop the bleeding.

"They are on their way."

Nancy heard from around the counter and looked around the store noticing for the first time that the man who had fired the gun was gone. She looked back down to Alex as she heard the sirens getting closer. "Alex you're going to be ok, just hold on."

Meredith heard Nancy talking and she slowly opened her eyes.

Nancy saw her friend trying to say something. "Don't worry Alex, help is on the way. We're going to get you to the hospital."

Meredith had been trying to speak but she felt like she was drifting away. She felt her eyes getting heavy but was trying to fight the darkness that was starting to overtake her again. She felt Nancy's hands on her and she grabbed one of her hands. "Cold…head…cold…"

Nancy felt Alex grab her hand and she squeezed it. She looked to Alex and saw her lips moving. She bent down closer to her so she could try to make out what she was saying. As soon as she realized what she said she looked up at the counter. She saw blood and realized that Alex had hit her head. "Hold on Alex, they are coming. I'm going to get you to the hospital, you'll be ok."

"Derek, hey man nice to see you again. How are you?"

Derek looked up from the table to see Mark and Addison both standing before him with huge grins. Derek rolled his eyes. "Mark you just saw me," Derek paused and looked at his watch and then back up to Mark and Addison. "An hour ago."

Mark and Addison sat down at the table. "An hour ago really? Addison it's been an hour since I last saw Derek. A lot can happen in an hour wouldn't you agree?"

Addison giggled. "I couldn't agree more Mark. An hour is what 60 minutes long. That's like 60 things that could have happened since you last saw him."

Derek closed the chart he had been looking at and sat back in his chair. "Alright what is going on?"

"What are you talking about Derek we just wanted to say hi."

"Addi I saw you this morning and Mark did not have that smirk on his face an hour ago."

"I don't know what you are talking about Derek."

Derek looked closely at his two friends before speaking up again. "You went at it in the on call room again didn't you?"

Addison blushed a little while Marks smile just got bigger.

"I'm right you couldn't go the entire day without keeping your hands to yourself?"

"You are just jealous you don't have anyone to go at it with in an on call room."

Addison lightly slapped Mark's arm. "Leave him alone Mark."

Derek chuckled at the look on Mark's face when Addison slapped him. "So what are you two up to?"

"Just celebrating."

"Celebrating what?"

"Can I tell him Addi, please?" Mark asked as he looked to Addison. She nodded and he turned back to Derek. "We're going to have a little Mark."

"Or Addison."

Derek looked at the two who still had smiles on their faces. "Really?"

Addison nodded. "I got it confirmed today. I told Mark as soon as I knew for sure and now we are telling you. You are going to be an uncle again."

Derek smiled as it sunk in and then he jumped up giving Addison a hug. "Congratulations." He then turned to Mark who had now stood and they both embraced in a brotherly hug. "Congratulations man, I couldn't be happier for the two of you."

The three sat back down at the table. Derek looked to Addison. "Have you told Mer?"

"No. I was going to email her when I got home and ask her to call me so I can tell her. I want to tell her in person but I don't know when that will be and I want to tell her as soon as possible."

"Don't worry Addi, she will be happy for us."

"I know Mark I just don't want to bring up bad memories."

"Addi she will be happy. She loves you guys. Don't worry."

Addison nodded her understanding. "So Mark told me your sister is in town."

"Yeah. We are going to go out for dinner tonight and you two are coming with."

"It sounds like it could be fun, I haven't seen Nancy in a long time. How is she doing?"

"She's good Addi. She is going to New York after her visit to start her internship. She seems happy."

"That's good. I'm sure your mom is happy about that since she will be close by."

Derek was about to respond when his phone went off. "Dr. Sheppard."

"Dr. Sheppard this is Nurse Debbie…"

"Nurse Debbie, why are you calling me on my phone and how did you get this number?"

"Your sister Nancy has this number as her emergency contact number."

"Nancy, what's wrong with her is she ok, is she hurt?"

"Dr. Sheppard she is here in the pit. She was brought in but she won't let us treat her…"

Again Derek cut her off. "I'll be right there. Tell her I'm on my way." Derek hung up the phone and turned to leave.

"Derek what's wrong with Nancy?" Mark asked as he stood up.

Derek turned back to his friends. "I don't know. She's in the pit."

"Is she alright?"

"She said Nancy refuses to let them treat her. I'll let you know when I find out."

"Let's go." Mark said to Addison as both of them caught up to Derek.

When they entered the pit they heard yelling.

"Leave me alone damm it."

"Miss I really need to clean your cut and stitch it up for you."

"No not until I can see my friend."

Derek, Mark, and Addison had followed the yells to a curtain and Derek slowly pulled back the curtain. "Nancy?"

Nancy turned to see Derek, Mark, and Addison standing by the curtain. "Derek." Nancy cried as she let a tear fall.

Derek stepped up to her and immediately had her in a hug. After a moment he pulled back from her so that he could look at her. "Are you ok? What happened?"

"I'm fine Derek but they won't tell me how Alex is. I need to know that she is ok Derek."

"Who is Alex?"

"Roommate from college, I told you I was staying with her while I was in town. She's starting her internship at Seattle Grace and I wanted to spend a little more time with her before I had to head to Ney York. She was hurt and they won't tell me anything."

Derek softly touched her face. "You need stitches Nancy."

"Derek, I need to know that Alex is ok."

"I'm more concerned about you at the moment. Did she have a CT?" Derek asked the intern in the room. The intern shook his head no and Derek continued. "Let's go Nancy. After your CT we'll take care of your cut."

"Derek I'm fine and I'm not going anywhere until I know she is going to be ok."

"Nancy she is in the hospital, her doctor will take care of her. Let's go." Derek finished as he went to help her off the gurney.

"No Derek." Nancy said as she pulled her arm away. "I need to know she will be ok before I go anywhere."

"We have to make sure you are ok and then we can check on your roommate. Stop being so stubborn."

"Derek I love you but I am not going until I know." She said starring him in the eye daring him to protest further. Derek saw the pleading in her eyes as she continued. "She was shot and she hit her head. I couldn't stop the bleeding from the gunshot wound and I didn't know what to do about her head. She lost consciousness again before the paramedics and police got there."

"Gunshot, police. What happened Nancy?"

Nancy was about to answer when they heard commotion from another curtain.

"She's seizing get her on her side!"

"Derek, you have to help her."

Derek watched his sister pleading in front of him. He couldn't understand why she was so desperate. "Nancy I need to take care of you first."

Nancy listened to the yells still coming from another crtain and looked back to Derek. "She needs the best Derek. Please she needs the best."

Derek looked to Mark and Addison who were both standing next to him before looking back to Nancy. "Nancy why is this so important, there are other doctors here?"

After the question was asked they heard someone yell, "She's flat lining, charge to…"

"Derek you have to save her, Mark please do something." Nancy pleaded again as a tear rolled down her cheek.

That's all it took to get Derek to move. He motioned for Mark to follow him and they both left Nancy and Addison to go help Nancy's friend.

Derek pulled back the curtain as they heard the heart monitor start to beep. Quickly he went into doctor mode. "What have we got?"

"She has a gunshot wound to her chest. No exit wound and she has lost a lot of blood but we managed to stop the bleeding. We are assuming she hit her head when she fell because of the wound on her head and she lost consciousness. She just had a seizer and we are getting ready to take her for a CT, Dr. Sheppard."

Derek had looked at the chart and took a couple steps towards the gurney to examine her head wound. When he got there he was about to look in her eyes when he paused. His breathe caught in his throat.

"Derek what is it?" Mark asked taking a step towards Derek. When he got close enough he looked at the woman laying before them.

"Meredith."

"Derek she's stable we can wait for another consult."

"No Mark she already had a seizure and she flat lined. We need to find out what the problem is and fix it as soon as possible and that gunshot wound needs to be fixed. She lost too much blood." Derek said and then paused as he looked to Mark. "I can't lose her."

Mark nodded his understanding. "Alright people someone page Dr. Burke and get the CT, page us when you have the results." Mark then turned to Derek as they wheeled Meredith out of the room. "You need to tell Nancy who she is."

"Not yet."

They started back towards Nancy and Addison but Mark suddenly stopped them. "You know you can't do the surgery?" Mark watched Derek turn to face him again. "If there is an injury, you can't do it Derek you'll have to let Dr. James do the surgery."

"She needs the best…I'm here…I don't trust her with anyone else."

"You know the rules, we can't treat family."

"Mark, technically, she is not my 'family'. I don't want to say this but right now in this moment and until the surgery is over, she is not family. She is Alex Stephens my sisters roommate from college and she needs the best."

Mark saw the pleading look in his friends eyes. "I guess it's lucky for her that the best is here right now in this moment then." Mark said with a smirk. "Just so you know when she wakes up I am going to tell her about your ego just now."

Derek smiled thinking about the many discussions they all had concerning his ego. "When she wakes up, I will tell her myself. What are we going to tell Addi?"

"I don't want to tell her until we know she will be ok."

Derek glared at Mark. "You know Addi will be mad when she finds out you didn't tell her the truth."

"I know but you know how she feels about Meredith. I don't want anything to happen to the baby so right now as you said that woman is Alex Stephens and we are helping because we are the best." Mark paused and then smiled at Derek. "A week's worth of sleeping on the couch is nothing as long as her and the baby are ok, it will be worth it."

Derek chuckled a little at Marks response he knew it wouldn't be just a week's worth.

Derek nodded and pulled back the curtain to reveal Nancy and Addison. "Nancy you have to let someone take care of that cut."

"Derek just tell me how bad is it?"

Derek sighed. "She has lost a lot of blood. She is stable and they took her down for a CT. As soon as they get the results we are going to go find out more." Derek looked to Mark as if he was asking for help.

"Nancy how about I stitch you up?" Mark asked as Nancy looked from Derek to him and raised her eyebrows. "Don't look at me like that. You need stitches and I'm the best plastic surgeon so I can prevent a scar or you can let your brother do it. Your choice but I would strongly suggest you pick me since you still need a husband."

Nancy smiled. "You still have quite the ego Sloan?"

"I can't help it if I'm the best now what will it be?"

"Go ahead." Nancy said and Mark right away set to work at cleaning and stitching. "Derek did she wake up?" She watched as Derek didn't say anything. She looked up to Mark. "Mark?"

"No she's still unconscious." He watched as Nancy got tears in her eyes. "Nancy what happened?"

Nancy took a breath and it all came out at once. "Alex didn't want to get up she said she had a feeling. I made her get up. We went for breakfast and then we went to the mall. When we left the mall I asked Alex to take me to a nice jewelry store." Nancy paused as she looked at Derek and saw the smile on his face. "I just need to stay up to date on what's in." Nancy paused briefly and got a far off look in her eyes as she continued. "I brought up that I thought she was acting weird because she kept checking over her shoulder. We were looking around when someone came in. He pulled out a gun and robbed the store."

"Did he get the money?"

"Mark."

"Addi if he got the money why would he hurt anyone?"

"He said he wanted her to pay. He acted like he knew her. She shouldn't have…he was going to…he…"

"Nancy what is it?"

"Derek he was going to shoot me."

Derek pulled her into a hug. "Sshh it's ok Nancy, I'm sure you were scarred but you are ok now."

Nancy pulled away, wiped away her tears, and then looked back up at Derek. "I'm more scarred of losing my friend before I can thank her for saving my life." Nancy looked at her brother and her two friends. She could tell they didn't understand what she was saying so she continued. "He grabbed me and put the gun to me while he made the cashier empty the register. She put it on the counter and Alex grabbed it. She said she wouldn't give it to him unless he let me go. I struggled with him and before I knew it he had hit me and I fell to the ground. Alex helped me up. I was leaning against the counter, she had taken a step back from me and started talking to him. I don't remember what they said but all of the sudden he pointed the gun at me and I heard it go off. Alex jumped in front of me. The bullet went into her instead of me. She fell and hit her head on the counter. The man ran out of the store and I put presser on the wound while the cashier called the police. Derek she saved me, she didn't have to but she saved me and you have to save her." Nancy stopped as she let Derek puller into another hug.

Derek looked to Mark over Nancy's head with worry and pain. "Ssshh Nancy, it will be ok." Just then Derek and Mark's pagers went off. "The scans are done. Let's go Mark." Derek gave Nancy a kiss on the cheek and turned to leave.

"Mark?"

"I'm going to help Addi. The girl has enough scars, I'm going to do the best I can to prevent anymore." Mark gave Nancy a kiss on the cheek and then gave Addison a kiss before turning to Derek and the both of them left to find out what was wrong with Meredith.

_**I am so sorry for not updating in a while!**__ You know the saying life got in the way I never thought I would be one to say it but it happened. Anyway I am back and I have already started working on the next few chapters. As before, I won't promise when the next update will be but I can promise it won't take me a month. I did get a couple requests to update so I hope that means you all are still reading. Please remember, if you have time, let me know what you think. __**Thank-you for sticking with me!**_


	11. Chapter 11

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy._

Chapter 11

"What's taking so long, why hasn't Derek come back?"

Addison and Nancy had now moved to the waiting room. Addison reached over and grabbed Nancy's hand. "I know it's hard but we have to wait. Derek and Mark will come and tell us once they have something to tell us."

"Addison they haven't told us anything yet. They should have at least told us what they need to do. Can you go see if you can find something out?"

Addison squeezed her hand and nodded. She walked out to the nurses' station. "Olivia I need to know where Dr. Sloan and Dr. Sheppard are and what the results were of Alex Stephens tests. Do you know?"

"Dr. Montgomery-Sloan, Dr. Sloan, Dr. Sheppard, and Dr. Burke are all in OR3 with Alex Stephens." Olivia continued explaining to Addison what she knew.

Addison walked back to Nancy who was looking tired and worried. "Nancy, she's in surgery."

"What's wrong?" Nancy asked as she saw the worried look on her friends face.

Addison sat down and grabbed Nancy's hand as she started to explain what she knew. "They took her into surgery as soon as they saw the CT results. They saw she was beginning a subdural hematoma so Derek went in right away to fix it. Dr. Burke is working on the gunshot wound. It didn't hit her heart but he needs to get the bullet out and stop the bleeding. They should be almost done. Derek ordered a private room which is set up so why don't we go wait for them there? I let the nurse know to tell Derek where we will be."

Nancy didn't say anything she only nodded. Together both women headed down the halls to the private room and took seats to wait for more news.

"Thank-you Dr. Burke."

"I'm just doing my job Dr. Sheppard."

Derek, Mark, and Preston Burke were in the scrub room after the surgery washing up. When the door opened.

"Why in the world are three of my attending working on one patient and why was I told that you Sheppard ordered said patient have a private room? I don't recall being informed of any VIP patients." There was silence for a few seconds before he spoke again. "I want answers."

Dr. Burke looked at the two other doctors and he saw the uneasy looks they gave each other. He then looked back to the man who was now yelling. "Chief if you'll excuse me I'm going to go check on my patient before she gets taken to her room while Dr. Sheppard and Dr. Sloan answer your questions."

"Thank-you Preston."

"You're welcome, Dr. Sheppard, Dr. Sloan." Preston nodded before leaving the room.

Once the door closed Dr. Webber again addressed Derek and Mark. "One of you speak up."

Derek and Mark both looked at each other silently telling the other to speak. "She's your girlfriend, you tell him."

"Girlfriend?"

"Chief, it's Meredith."

"What?"

"Meredith Grey, she's the patient."

"Meredith what happened? She's not due to start her internship for 2 months. Why is she a patient in my hospital?"

Derek sighed. "She was with my sister Nancy. They were at a jewelry store when it got robbed. From what Nancy said, Meredith jumped in front of her when the gun went off and when she fell she hit her head on the counter."

"How did the surgery go?" Dr. Webber asked with concern.

Mark stepped in knowing how hard this was on Derek. "Chief, it was flawless. Derek did everything perfect and Preston got the bullet out and stopped the bleeding. I helped with closing to try and prevent scarring."

Dr. Webber nodded and then remembered what else Mark had said. "Derek, girlfriend?"

"Richard, I'm not going to lie. I care about her a lot I mean to the point that I know she is going to be my wife but right now, right now we are just good friends. She is not ready for anything else."

"Just be careful, don't hurt her."

"That's what everyone keeps telling me and I can assure you I don't plan on hurting her."

The three of them all started out of the room to go check on her when Dr. Webber stopped them again. "Why are you both here? I didn't think you guys were on call?"

"Addi and I were with Derek when he got the call from Nurse Debbie that Nancy was here and she was refusing treatment so we went with him."

"Is Nancy ok Derek?"

"Yes, she had a cut on her head which Mark stitched up before we got Mer's results."

"Where's Addi and how is she taking this?"

"She's with Nancy and neither of them know it's Meredith yet." Mark said and then he saw the confusion on Dr. Webber's face he turned to Derek.

"Meredith was Nancy's roommate through college. It's funny really, all these years of listening to Nancy talk about her roommate Alex while I talked about Meredith and I never thought it was the same person. I should have gone to visit Nancy at college."

"I guess Nancy never talked about you or told her who her brother was."

"What's that suppose to mean Mark?"

"Think about it. You talked to Nancy about the girl you are planning on marring, if Nancy repeated any of it to Mer do you really think she would have come back to Seattle?" Mark stopped as he watched Derek. "She ran to college when you said you loved her, imagine where she would go if she knew you were planning her wedding."

"She didn't run, she was planning on college all along. And I am not planning our wedding Mark, she will do that when it's time and I don't even have a ring."

"You've looked at them. I've seen the jewelry magazines in your apartment and don't tell me it's to keep up on what's in. Nancy can use that line but I know you better than that."

Derek blushed a little as he looked at Mark and saw the look on his face, he then turned back to Richard. "Richard, I promise I won't hurt her. Now if you will excuse me I need to go tell Nancy what happened and check on Mer." Derek said as he started to walk away. He stopped and looked back at Mark. "You coming or are you going to hide from Addi until she calms down?"

"I'll be in to check on her later. Good job you two." Dr. Webber said before walking away.

Mark caught up with Derek. "I don't need for her to calm down."

"Right. Did you by an air mattress?"

"What?"

"For the floor. It would be more comfortable than the couch. Last time you had to spend the night on the couch you complained about your back for a week." Mark went to say something but Derek continued. "It's going to be more than a week Mark, just remember that and I am not giving you a key to my apartment for the spare bed."

"For the record I have a key to your apartment already in case of emergency, remember." Mark said with a satisfied grin. "And once Addi knows Mer is ok she will forget about the fact that we didn't tell her so there will be no couch and no air mattress."

"This would not be an emergency and Addi can't make me sleep on the couch or air mattress so keep telling yourself that Mark."

"Whatever let's just get this over with." Mark mumbled.

They both walked to the private room Derek had requested to tell Addi and Nancy what had happened.

"Nancy tell me about your roommate."

"Well we started rooming together in freshman year. She was quiet, reserved at first but once she got use to me we hit it off. Sometimes though I feel like I don't know her at all."

"What do you mean?"

"She just…she seems like…I think she's holding onto something from her past and, I don't really know she's so secretive about things. She doesn't let others in I think it's because she's afraid of getting hurt. But she has the biggest heart of anyone I know. She is very pig headed and stubborn. Really, really stubborn, to the point that you can never win an argument with her even if you have proof she's wrong. She avoids things and she keeps things locked up inside." Nancy smiled as she continued locking eyes with Addison. "She is loyal, she fights for what she wants, and she is the strongest person I know. She doesn't trust people easily either and…she is a terrible liar."

Addison didn't know what to say but there was something about the things Nancy was saying, they were familiar.

"I have tried to get her to open up about her past but she has these walls that I can't seem to get through. Honestly after all these years I am kind of afraid of what she could be ignoring but I just want to help her. You always hear how talking about things makes it better but Alex doesn't believe in that and the only time I have seen her cry is when she wakes up from her nightmares."

Addison noticed how Nancy changed from concern to happiness and then back to concern as she talked about her roommate. "What about family, we should call her family?"

"Her mom is traveling and she doesn't talk about her father. She has some close friends she calls them her family."

"Do you have their names I can have a nurse call them?"

Nancy laughed and then explained as she saw the questioning stare coming her way. "I don't know their names, at least not their real names. She has nick names for them from when they were kids."

"Nick names?"

"Yeah, there is Bambi, Barbie, Crack Whore, Mcsteamy, Mcwife, and my favorite and apparently the person she has a major crush on but won't admit it to me or herself…" Nancy had rattled off the names and when she got to the final one both her and Addison said it. "Mcdreamy."

Just as Addison looked up at Nancy the door to the room opened and in walked Derek and Mark. Addison studied their faces and then stood and walked up to both of them. First she reached up and slapped Derek in the back of the head and before either Derek or Mark could make a sound she did the same to Mark.

Both men rubbed the spots on the back of their heads and replied. "Ouch Addi!" Mark continued. "What was that for?"

'It's Meredith." Derek said as he stopped rubbing his head and looked at Addison.

"I gathered from speaking with Nancy. You should have told me." Addison said as she looked to Mark.

"I didn't want you to worry Addi." Mark replied and then Addison again slapped him in the head. "Ouch, will you please stop that."

"You should have told me Mark." Addison then heard a chuckle and she quickly turned and slapped Derek again as well. "And that Mcdreamy was for going along with him and not telling me."

Derek didn't get a chance to respond as Nancy's voice rang out. "Mcdreamy?"

Derek looked to Addison because he had assumed that Addison would have told Nancy the truth since she had figured it out.

"I didn't have a chance to tell her before you got back. She doesn't know yet Derek."

"She doesn't know what Addison, what is going on?"

Derek knew he needed to be the one to tell her so he took a step forward. "Nancy…" Derek paused not exactly sure of what to say. He looked back to Mark and Addison and then back to Nancy. "Why don't we all take a seat and I'll explain everything." Derek stopped and waited for everyone to sit. Once they were all seated he started again. "Nancy, your roommate, her name isn't Alex Stephens, it's Meredith Grey. Mark, Addi, and I met her when she was seventeen. She soon turned eighteen and shortly after that she came and lived with us before she left for school."

"Meredith, your Meredith the Meredith who is stubborn, quiet, avoids things, secretive, pig headed and…"

Derek chuckled remembering the many conversations he and Nancy had regarding his 'crush' as she put it. "Yes my Meredith."

Nancy reached over and slapped Derek in the back of the head.

"Ouch what was that for?"

"You Derek Sheppard are stupid. How many times did I tell you to come visit me? Wait…you're Mcdreamy?"

Derek saw Mark and Addison chuckling. "How do you know about that?"

"Alex, Meredith whenever she talks about her friends she uses their nick names. I don't know their real names, well I guess I know yours."

"Yes that's what her friends call me."

"So who are the others?" Nancy didn't wait for the question instead she quickly gave the names she was questioning. "Bambi, Barbie, Evil Spawn, Crack Whore, Mcsteamy, and Mcwife."

Derek chuckled. And turned to Mark and Addison before turning back to Nancy. "Help me out if I get this mixed up. Ok, Bambi is George O'Malley, Barbie is Izzie Stephens, Crack Whore is Christina Yang, Mcwife is Addison…" Derek paused and smiled before continuing quickly. "Evil Spawn is Mark and Mcsteamy is Alex Karev."

"I'm Mcsteamy." Mark stated while Derek and Addison started laughing.

Addison recovered first. "You don't have to whine about it honey he was just teasing you." Addison said as she patted him on the arm.

"He's right, Alex Karev is Evil Spawn and Mark is Mcsteamy."

Nancy turned to Addison. "How can you stand being around them, Mcdreamy and Mcsteamy? What was she thinking?"

"I know, but she didn't name them. Christina named Mcdreamy and Izzie named Mcsteamy here."

Nancy smiled and turned back to Derek and became serious. "Why did she use Alex Stephens?"

Derek saw the quick look of fear. "She's not in trouble Nancy. She doesn't want people to know who her mother is, and I use the word mother loosely. She is Ellis Grey."

"Ellis Grey the Ellis Grey?"

"Wow. Why? That would be so cool to have her for a mom."

Derek became quiet and Addison spoke up. "Trust us when we say Dr. Grey was never her mom."

The room fell into silence for a few moments. "Who is Luke?"

"Who?"

"Luke. You mentioned George and Alex but you never mentioned Luke. Who is he?" Nancy asked and then she noticed how both Derek and Mark tensed at the mention of his name and Addison grabbed Mark's hand. "Who is he?"

No one got the chance to answer as Meredith was wheeled in. The nurses quickly hooked up the monitors and exited the room. The remaining four in the room stood around Meredith's bed.

"She looks so small laying there." Addison said as tears came to her eyes.

Mark pulled her in for a hug.

"Derek, is she going to be ok?" Nancy asked as she took her eyes away from Meredith and looked at Derek.

"She just needs to wake up now." Was all Derek could say as he took Meredith's hand in one of his hands. He took his other hand and pulled Nancy in for a hug.

Nancy looked to Mark wanting more of an explanation.

Mark watched Derek grab Meredith's hand and knew he wasn't going to answer any other questions so he told Addison and Nancy about the surgery. He finished with the details and saw the tears in both Addison and Nancy's eyes. "She's a fighter. She will not let this beat her."

The group fell into silence each sitting around the bed starring at Meredith willing her to wake up. After about an hour of waiting there was a knock on the door. In walked 2 officers.

"I'm sorry to interrupt but we need to speak to Ms. Sheppard and Ms. Stephens."

Derek immediately stood still holding Meredith's hand after hearing who they were asking for. "Why do you need to speak to them?"

"I'm Officer Phillips and this is my partner Officer Stone. We need to get a statement about what happened earlier today."

Derek tensed. "Meredith hasn't even woken up yet and Nancy has been through enough today. Just leave us alone today."

"Sir I understand you're upset…"

"You understand…" Derek cut him off.

Mark Stood and placed his hand on Derek's shoulder as soon as he heard Derek interrupt the officer. "Derek calm down, getting upset isn't going to help anyone."

Officer Phillips spoke again. "Thank-you sir. Listen I understand you are all upset about what happened but the longer we wait the further away he will get."

Nancy had been silent up until then. She stood and addressed the officers. "I will tell you what happened but I'm not going anywhere. I want to be here when she wakes up."

"That's fine. Can we have some privacy?" Officer Phillips asked the three doctors in the room.

Nancy saw Derek start to respond when she squeezed his hand. "Officer they can stay. I already told them what happened when I was brought in with Meredith."

"Meredith? I thought the victim was Alex Stephens?" The officer said after flipping through his notes.

"That is what she went by but her name is Meredith Grey." Nancy said.

Everyone took their seats and Nancy began telling the officers everything that had happened in the store.

"Thank-you Ms. Sheppard but we have a few questions." The officer waited for Nancy's nod and then he continued. "Did you know the man?"

"No, I never saw him before."

"Did Ms. Grey know him?"

"No…I don't think so…I don't know." Nancy said as she looked at Addison, Mark, and Derek. "She didn't say anything about him before but she said his name and he acted like he knew her."

"What was his name?"

"Luke."

"Why do you say he acted like he knew her?"

"Because he said he wanted her to pay for the last five years." Nancy finished and then heard the quick breaths from Derek, Mark and Addison.

"He's out?"

"Addi, he got out about a month ago. He said he was going to Texas to be with his sister. Why would he come back here?"

"Why didn't you tell me Derek?" Addison asked as she looked to Mark who had a guilty expression. "You knew didn't you?"

"Addi, I was going to tell you but things got crazy here at the hospital and I just never had the right time."

"Excuse me but what are you three talking about?"

Addison decided she should be the one to tell about how Meredith and Luke know each other. She told the story the best she could trying to not give too many details knowing how private Meredith was. She saw the officers taking notes, Mark was holding her hand while staring at Meredith, Derek had moved back to Meredith's bed and had her hand again starring at her, and Nancy had gotten up and went to the other side of the bed where she held Meredith's other hand and she too was watching Meredith. Addison finally finished the story.

The officers stood. "Thank-you all for your help. I think that is enough for now. Please call us when she wakes up so that she can give us a statement." Officer Phillips said as he handed Addison his card and both him and his partner left the room.

Once the door was closed they heard a sob. All eyes went to Nancy.

"I'm so sorry Meredith, I should have made you talk to me."

Addison immediately went to Nancy's side and hugged her while Derek and Mark stood next to each other watching the two women. "Nancy don't do that. There is no way you could have know what happened to her. I know how stubborn she is and she would not have told you anything."

"I tried to get her to talk to me after the nightmares but she never would. She always said she was fine, but I heard her tears each night. I almost got her to talk one night after she drank a bottle of tequila but she passed out and acted like she didn't remember anything the next day."

"What nightmares?"

"Almost every night she had one. She either woke up screaming his name or she would wake herself up in a cold sweat. They were always worse after she came back from Seattle and now I know why."

Derek squeezed Meredith's hand and whispered. "She told me they had stopped."

"That's what she all of us Derek." Mark said as he locked eyes with Addison.

"The rumors were true. Why didn't she stick up for herself?"

Addison looked back to Nancy. "What rumors?"

"All the guys on campus called her a tease. They said…well…" Nancy struggled to get the words out.

"Nancy just say it." Derek said afraid of what she would say.

"We use to party. The first couple years we went to every party. Meredith would get drunk and disappear. I always assumed she was with some guy but after the second or so party the rumors started. They said she was a tease. She would go up with different guys to their rooms and then supposedly when they were to seal the deal she would burst out crying so they guys never got anything. She still kept going acting like nothing was wrong, acting like she never remembered it in the morning. Then one day after one of her trips here she just stopped going and really started focusing on her school work."

"She never got over it. How could we not know this?"

"Derek don't beat yourself up over this."

"How could I have not known this Mark? She is a terrible liar, I should have known."

"Derek you told me yourself you can always tell what she is thinking or have a conversation with her by reading her eyes so how exactly could you have known she was lying by reading her emails or talking on the phone?"

"I hate it when you're actually right about something you know that?" Derek asked as he saw the smile form on Marks face. "I still should have known."

"I know you love her Derek but you weren't with her at all times and sometimes we see what we want to see." Mark said as he looked from Addison back to Derek feeling confidant in what he was saying. "You couldn't be with her 24/7 so when you two were together I'm sure you didn't talk about the past. Knowing you, you kept things light so she wouldn't panic." He finished with a smile.

Derek, Addison, and Nancy all sat starring at Mark. Each were wondering where this all had come from. Addison spoke up. "You are turning into a women on me aren't you?"

"What? Addison why would you say that? You are the one that tells me I have to be nice and supportive when he talks about her ALL THE TIME." Mark said and finished gesturing to Meredith.

"Sorry I didn't realize being a friend was such a chore. And besides who is it that listens to you complain when is it oh right, the third week of each month?"

"Derek, you said you would never talk about that."

"What is the third week of every month?"

"Don't worry Addi you won't have to worry about it for the next nine months." Derek said with a smile.

Mark watched as realization settled on Addison and then he turned to Derek and leaned in to whisper. "Do you have any idea what you have done? That was low Derek."

"Oh don't worry Mark, she will get over it and you started it."

"Keep telling yourself that Mcdreamy but when Mer wakes up we'll see if you feel the same way."

"You don't have nothing on me Mcsteamy so I have nothing to worry about."

"Mark Sloan! The third week of every month. You talk to our friend about the third week of every month?"

"Not so much talk Addi. It's more like he complains about your moods and I listen."

Mark elbowed Derek before talking. "Addi he was my best friend up until 2 minutes ago and he is still my brother even though at this moment I don't remember why."

"What was Derek talking about nine months Addison?"

Addison looked to Mark and Derek and then with a smile she turned back to Nancy. "Hopefully we will be having a little Addison."

"Or Mark." Mark chimed in.

"Oh that's great. Congratulations both of you." Nancy said as she got up and hugged both of them.

They all spent some time talking before falling into silence again.

After some time Derek sat up straighter in his chair and leaned in closer to Meredith's face. "Mer?"

The other three in the room looked at him and then looked at Meredith's still sleeping form. "Derek?"

"Mer I'm here, wake up please." Derek pleaded as he watched Meredith's face waiting for her to open her eyes.

Meredith felt someone holding her hand and she gently squeezed it. She tried to open her eyes but she was still too tired. "Derek." Was all she could get out before the blackness overtook her again.

"Did you hear her?"

"She's going to be ok."

Derek had a smile on his face as he reached over and squeezed Nancy's hand. "She's going to be ok."

Mark and Addison both smiled at him and Addison yawned. "I had no doubt in her at all. Now I'm going to take Mcwife here home so she can get some rest. I'll bring you back some food in a few hours."

"Mark I don't want to leave until I get a chance to talk to her."

"Addi, she won't be fully awake for a few hours you know that. I'll call if anything changes and you know it's not just you anymore, you need to rest." Derek said looking to Addison.

"Fine but only because I will be coming back with him so I can make sure you eat." Derek was about to protest when Addison continued. "If you don't eat I will tell Meredith when she wakes up and I know you don't want that do you?"

"Fine." Derek said and then he looked at Nancy. "Can you guys take Nancy with you?"

"I'm fine here Derek."

"No you need to get some rest and get cleaned up. No offense, I love you but you look terrible."

Nancy thought about it for a moment and then decided to agree knowing he just wanted some time with Meredith. "Fine." Nancy then turned to Mark and Addison. "Can you drop me at Meredith's house and then pick me back up when you come back?"

"Of course we can. Come on I still remember where she lives and Derek we'll call before we head back to get your food order." Addison said.

Nancy squeezed Meredith's hand and then gave Derek a hug before walking out with Addison and Mark.

Derek sighed and then took his seat next to Meredith. He wanted to climb in bed with her and hold her but he knew it wasn't a good idea. He laid his head down next to her head and he softly stroked her hair before falling asleep himself.

After some time Derek woke to his phone vibrating. He quickly looked at the id and answered. "Hey Mark."

"Derek did she wake up yet?"

"No she's still sleeping. Are you guys on your way back?"

"Yeah, we just picked up Nancy. She brought some things for Meredith and we are going to grab something to eat. What do you want?"

"I don't care where ever you go just pick me up something. I'm not even hungry."

"Oh no you don't. Last time you said that you complained about what we brought you. Just pick something."

"Mark really I don't care what you bring to eat as long as it's not hospital food I'll eat anything."

"Derek if I was there I would hit you right now you are worse than a woman just make up your mind." As soon as Mark finished his sentence he got slapped by the two women in the car with him. "Ouch. Addi that was not nice. You know how he gets. And you Nancy, you realize you are riding in my car right?"

"Mark?" Derek asked as he heard Addison speaking to Mark in the back ground.

"Sorry Derek but my wife and your sister are trying to cause an accident. Will you just pick something?"

"Fine, how about hamburgers?"

"Pizza."

Derek's head turned to Meredith and he saw her slowly open her eyes.

"Derek, Derek what was that, what did you say?"

"Meredith?"

"Meredith, what Derek, is she ok? Derek."

"Hey sleepy head, I'm glad your back with us."

"Pizza please."

"What?"

"Since you aren't going to make a choice then I'll choose and I want pizza please."

Derek chuckled. "Did you hear that Mark? The lady wants pizza, can you handle it?"

Mark laughed. "Yeah I heard her and you know she always gets what she wants from me. Hold on a second." Mark told Addison and Nancy that Meredith was awake and asking for pizza. Addison pulled out her phone and ordered the pizza so it would be ready when they got there. "Ok Derek, Addi ordered the pizza, we'll be there in a few minutes."

"Alright, I'll keep her busy until you guys get here."

"Fine but I don't want to walk in on anything and lose my appetite when I get there."

"Shut up Mark, goodbye." Derek said as he hung up the phone. "They will be here in a few minutes. I'm going to go get your doctor to check on you before they get here."

"Derek."

"I promise I won't be gone long, I'm just going to get your doctor." And with that he walked out of the room and had her doctor paged.

After a few minutes Derek walked back into her room with two other doctors. "Mer, this is Dr. Preston Burke and this is Dr. Miranda Bailey."

Preston stepped forward while Miranda set about examining her. "Hello Ms. Grey. It's nice to see you awake. How are you feeling?"

"It's nice to meet you two and do you want the truth?"

"I think that's a good place to start." Preston said with a smile.

"I feel like crap, I mean my head hurts and my chest hurts and I'm hungry but not for hospital food, I want pizza but there isn't any here and I'm hungry and I want to go home and…"

"Mer, your rambling." Derek smirked from beside Preston.

"What was the non truth?" Miranda asked as she was listening to breath sounds.

"I'm fine."

Derek laughed. "You haven't changed at all."

"I'm glad I asked for the truth then." Preston said and then he went about telling Meredith about her surgery and expected recovery.

Meredith listened and by the time he was done talking she had remembered everything that had happened. Dr. Burke and Dr. Bailey had finished their examination and left the room. Once they were out of the room, Meredith turned to Derek. "Derek, were is Nancy?"

"Nancy?" Derek wasn't surprised that she was asking about Nancy considering how Meredith always seemed to care more for others than herself.

"She's fine, she just went to get cleaned up, she should be here any minute." Derek saw the look of worry in her eyes. "Mer, I promise she is okay and she will be here…"

Derek was cut off by the door opening and in came Nancy, Addison, and Mark who was caring the pizza. "Alex!" Nancy said as she practically ran to the bed and bent down to give Meredith a hug trying to be careful.

"Nancy, are you alright? Did you get hurt?"

Nancy pulled back from her. "I'm good. Mark stitched up my cut so I shouldn't have any scars."

Meredith laughed and then realized how much it hurt so she immediately stopped. "Of course you wouldn't want any scars. Michael wouldn't approve of any scars on his fiancé's face now would he?"

"Fiancé'?" Derek asked.

"Sssh, Derek not now."

Meredith looked between the two and saw a look she hadn't seen before on Derek's face. "I'm sorry, am I missing something? How do you and Derek know each other?"

Derek realized Mark was right and Meredith didn't know they were related, he knew it would be better to tell the truth. "Mer, Nancy is my sister."

"Wh…what…what?" Meredith asked. She had heard but she wanted to make sure because if what Derek said was true then all of Nancy and her talks changed everything and she just wasn't ready to deal with that. Suddenly she looked Nancy in the eye. "Nancy?"

Nancy looked down for a moment and then back up at Meredith. "You don't get to be mad at me, you lied to me."

"I never lied to you. You have been trying to get me to tell you about Mcdreamy, you tried to get me to talk whenever I drank too much, I let you hold my hand when I cried sometimes…you…what were you going back to tell him how pathetic I am? How could you keep this from me? I opened up to you and talked to you more than I have anyone else besides my family here in Seattle. Did you get a good laugh out of it?" Meredith began starring at Nancy and her voice slowly raised as she continued. She got tears in her eyes from the pain she felt both from her injuries and from the betrayed she felt. By the time she was done she was yelling and had moved to sit up in her bed. "I was stupid enough to trust you, just leave."

Derek, Mark, and Addison were shocked by Meredith's outburst and when Meredith started to sit up they all saw her flinch from the pain. Derek quickly recovered from his shock and tried to calm her. "Mer please just lay back down. You're going to hurt yourself more if you don't calm down."

Meredith pulled back from Derek. "Don't touch me. What did she call you everyday to tell you everything I was doing? What about all the guys I slept with did she tell you that to? Or how about…"

Nancy had listened to everything that Meredith had been saying and she was in shock. She had thought about how Meredith would take the news when she found out that she was Mcdreamy's sister but she didn't expect her to be hateful. This was certainly not the roommate she had known over the years and yet she wasn't upset with her. She could see the hurt in her eyes and she knew that Meredith wasn't someone who opened up to people and after speaking to Derek, Mark, and Addison she knew why. When Nancy heard Meredith lash out at Derek she broke free from her shock and decided it was time to put a stop to this. "Shut up!" She yelled and then she felt all four sets of eyes on her. "I never lied to you. You never asked for my name and when Michael and I got engaged I started using his name. Now you on the other hand, I found out today that you are Meredith Grey not Alex Stephens so who is the one who lied? And for your information miss jump to conclusions, since I didn't know your real name, Derek never knew about you because he never came to visit me. And if you think I am leaving you better think again. First I don't start my residency for another 2 months so if I want to stay the entire time I will, second you saved my life today, and third even though you are a pain in the ass you are my friend and I care about you so you need to just relax and eat some of this pizza we brought so you can get better, is that clear?"

Meredith listened to Nancy and as she went on her anger started to disappear. She realized Nancy had almost the same eyes as Derek's and she trusted them. Once Nancy finished with the demands, Meredith started to giggle and then laugh. Soon Nancy joined in.

Derek, Mark, and Addison watched the two in front of them. Derek was surprised by Nancy but even more surprised by Meredith who had started to laugh. Mark and Addison shared a look as Mark looked back to Meredith who was starting to settle down obviously realizing that laughing was not a good idea this soon after surgery.

Meredith stopped laughing and held her hand out to Nancy. "I'm sorry."

Nancy quickly took Meredith's hand and squeezed it. "Don't be, you're forgiven. Just remember in the future, get the entire story or explanation first."

"Right, you've only been telling me that for how long now? Are you ok really?"

"I'm really ok Meredith. You are the one who jumped in front of me when he fired the gun. I owe you my life."

"You're my friend Nancy I would have done anything to make sure he didn't hurt you. I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"Meredith, seriously, enough. This is not your fault. I'm just glad you are ok. I'm sorry I dragged you into that store."

"Seriously, you so didn't drag me but next time I say I have a feeling you need to let me stay home."

"Deal." Meredith giggled again so Nancy decided to ask. "Now what?"

"You were rambling. When you were yelling you were rambling."

"Seriously is that all you got out of what I said?"

"Oh no I just thought it was funny you are always teasing me about my rambling but when you were yelling you were doing the same thing."

"Well what can I say I figured that the only way I could get through to you this time was to speak Meredith so I rambled, sue me."

At that she heard Derek , Mark, and Addison let out a laugh.

Meredith remembered the other three in the room. "Ok enough of the drama for tonight. I want some pizza."

"Well it's probably cold now after your bickering with Nancy." Mark said as he and Addison got the pizza ready.

"Cold pizza is better anyway Mcsteamy so hush."

"See Nancy, that is why we are friends."

"Here I thought it was because of all the hours we spent studying."

"Seriously, you want to go there Nancy? I was the one who was actually studying. Spending your time learning your fiancé's anatomy is not studying. I wonder how you actually graduated."

Derek and Nancy both coughed on their pizza while Mark let out another laugh. "I have to admit focusing on learning one persons anatomy is very beneficial and it helped me make it through med school wouldn't you agree Addi?"

"Mark if you even think to continue this conversation about our sex life and what we did in college you will be on the couch for a year."

Mark became silent right away. Meredith giggled again. "Did Michael give you an A in your anatomy class Nancy?"

Nancy's eyes went wide as she again heard Derek cough. "Meredith please let's talk about that later. Do you want another piece of pizza?"

Derek took a drink and then looked to Nancy. "So Nancy, since when do you have a fiancé?"

"Derek let's focus on Meredith."

"How do you not know him Derek? His name is Michael and he's really nice. He's a good guy and he's perfect for Nancy."

"I knew she was seeing someone but I never knew it was this serious."

"Derek, they have been together for 7 years how could it not be serious?"

Derek looked from Meredith back to Nancy. "Tell me more about him. Now that I know he wants to spend the rest of his life with you I promise I will listen better this time."

Meredith giggled. "Derek he's perfect for her. He is really nice, charming, and he has a good sense of humor. He's pretty persistent too. Nancy wouldn't go out with him at first but he got her to say yes. They talk all the time and whenever they are together they can't keep their hands off each other. This one time I came home and…"

Nancy put her hand up and interrupted Meredith. "Meredith!"

"Oh come on Nancy let her finish her story."

"Shut up Mark." Nancy said as she turned to face him and noticed his smirk then she turned back to Meredith. As she looked to Meredith she noticed the smile on Derek's face and Meredith had a similar smile. She pointed to Meredith as she spoke again. "You need to stop talking right now."

"Nancy, you are always trying to get me to talk and now I do and you tell me to stop. Seriously, what is with that?"

"Don't you dare try to play innocent on me. You know the point is to get you to talk about YOU. Embarrassing moments concerning my fiancé are off limits, especially in front of my brother."

"Addi and I are not your brother so go ahead and continue Mer."

Nancy turned to Addison and Mark. "Addison I will hurt him."

"Be my guest."

"Hey!" Mark exclaimed as the door opened.

"You're awake."

"Dr. Webber." Meredith acknowledged.

Dr. Webber walked into the room and stood by Derek. "Meredith you haven't started working yet and I use to change your diapers, please call me Richard." Dr. Webber stopped and then patted Derek on the shoulder. "I'm glad to see our patient is doing well."

Derek noticed Meredith's expression change from happiness to sad when she noticed Richard in the room. "She is, Dr. Burke was in right after she woke up and he said everything was looking good."

"I'm glad to hear that. So Meredith will your mother be coming soon?"

Meredith cringed when he mentioned her mother. "Dr. Webber…"

"Richard please Meredith."

"Dr. Webber, my mother…she can't be reached so you won't be able to see her anytime soon." Meredith finished in one breath.

"Meredith I…" Dr. Webber started to speak but nothing else came out.

Derek, Mark, and Addison all shared a look each was a little shocked at Meredith's behavior and each silently made a note to try and find out what it was about later. Addison saw Meredith try to hide a yawn. "Well it is getting late and Mer still needs her rest so we should get going Mark." Addison said as she stood pulling Mark with her.

"Right, well if you will all excuse me." Dr. Webber said as he started to the door. Once he reached it he stopped and turned back to Meredith. "I'm glad you are ok Meredith and please let me know if you need anything."

As Dr. Webber was walking out the door Meredith mumbled. "I won't"

Derek had heard her but decided not to say anything instead he turned to Mark and Addison. "Can you guys take Nancy home?"

"Of course we can."

"Derek you need to get some sleep too."

"I will Nancy. Just go with Mark and Addi."

"Derek when did your shift start?"

"Mer."

"Derek."

"Fine 5 this morning."

"And what time is it now?" She asked with a look in her eyes that told him he better answer.

"10pm."

"Derek, go home. Take Nancy with you and get some rest."

"I'm going to stay here in case you need anything."

"I am fine Derek. I just had surgery and can assure you I won't be going anywhere anytime soon so take your sister with you and get some rest." Meredith said and she left no room for argument.

Derek wanted to protest but he had seen the look in her eyes and knew he couldn't disagree with her. He decided he could go home with Nancy get a few hours sleep and then come back before she woke up. "Fine but I will be back in the morning."

"Probably before you even wake up Mer." Mark said as he walked up to Meredith and bent over to give her a kiss on the forehead. "I'll see you in the morning. And I'm glad you decided to stay with us."

Addison also gave Meredith a kiss on the cheek and said good bye. Nancy followed and then Derek.

Once they were all in the hall they started making their way to the exit. Mark let out a laugh and patted Derek on the shoulder. "She still has you wrapped around her fingers."

"What?"

"I know you didn't want to leave but yet here you are, leaving."

"I was just honoring her wish."

"Keep telling yourself that. She told you to jump and you did but you forgot to ask how high."

"Mark leave Derek alone, and Derek don't you dare listen to anything he says." Addison said hearing the conversation.

"Don't worry Addi I won't."

"Bad idea Derek."

"Says the man who will be sleeping on the couch tonight."

"Derek you never let them tell you…" Mark began and then what Addison had said finally registered. "What, Addi you can't be serious."

"Oh but I am honey." Addison said with an evil smile.

Derek saw the look on Addison's face. He patted Mark on the shoulder. "Mark always remember you have to pick your battles." Derek said with a smile as he saw the nod from Addison.

"What?"

"I'll explain it to you, let's go." Derek said as the four of them got in the car.

Meredith was in her room alone after her friends had left. Now with the silence all she could do was think. She thought about everything that had happened in the last 10 years and what had happened in the store. It didn't take long for the tears to start to fall. Eventually she cried herself to sleep.

_**I hope you liked the chapter!**__ I was glad to see that you are still Reading and I was very very veyry happy to get your reviews. They really do mean a lot so Thank-you to everyone who is Reading and THANK-YOU to everyone who reviewed. Please remember, if you have time, let me know what you think of this chapter. __**Thank-you for sticking with me!**_


	12. Chapter 12

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 11

"Nancy let's go."

"I'm coming Derek just hold on a minute."

Derek had been up since 5am and he wanted to go to the hospital. He hadn't gotten any pages that night so he figured Meredith was alright but until he saw her again he wouldn't be sure. It was now 8am and Nancy had been up for an hour but yet she was still not ready. It never ceased to amaze him how long it took anyone of his sisters to get ready. He had lived with them for most of his life and they never were ready in under 60 minutes but Meredith, Meredith was different. She could be ready in 15 minutes and still look beautiful. He smiled to himself as Nancy came into the room.

"I'm ready Derek but I want to talk first?"

"We can talk on the way to the hospital, I really want see Meredith."

"I want you to tell me about Meredith."

"You already know about Meredith."

"I know pieces Derek and I want to know everything. You have said yourself you want to marry her so tell me about the women you want to marry and why is she such a mystery to me?"

Derek sighed and took a seat on the couch. Nancy followed him as he started to talk. "You know her already Nancy. Everything I have told you over the years is true. She has been through so much in her life and I want to make her happy. I can't live without her. She tried to push me away when she left for school because she thought I was in love with someone else. It was the hardest time in my life. I haven't pushed her to love me and I won't..."

"What do you mean?"

"Addi helped me understand a little about Mer. Her mother was well nonexistent and when she was around all she did was hurt Mer. Her father left her when she was five. When she was going through school boys just wanted to get in her pants and then her and Luke got together. I don't know the entire story with him, she hasn't told me everything yet but I know he hit her. You know how we met but what I didn't tell you was that she used Alex as her name so her mom wouldn't find out. She took my breath away and from that moment I knew I loved her. Mark and Addi gave me a hard time but I told them it was fate."

"You are so cheesy Derek."

Derek rolled his eyes and continued. "So Mer, Mark, and Addi keep telling me. Anyway Mark, Addi, and I were on call when she was brought in the night she was raped. We all helped take care of her and got her a room. Later that night her mother came in and she blamed what happened on Meredith and was more concerned about what people would think about her than her own daughter. She went home and a few days later she came to our apartment. Addi had given her the address and phone number. Her mom had kicked her out. Mark and I came home and didn't know she was there. I went to go to bed, I tripped over her bag and fell on her. She was terrified. Addi came in and told us that she had told Meredith it was ok for her to stay there and Meredith panicked. She got up and got dressed and was heading to the door when Addi stopped her." Derek paused with a smile. "Addi talked or forced her to stay. When Addi went to say goodnight Mark and I were in the hall. Meredith said she felt safe in my bed. It was funny because Addi had tried to be stern in getting Meredith to stay and Meredith told her it wasn't very convincing. That was when I started sleeping on the couch and I didn't mind one bit. The next day she went to school and found out that she couldn't finish her year and then her mom said she was not to come back. I brought her home and she stayed with us until the day she left for college."

"What about Luke?"

"The trial came. She didn't tell us at first. The assistant DA called to tell her she had to testify and Addi answered. The next day Mark and I snuck into the court room before Mer and Addi got there. She testified, I wanted to kill him for what he did to her but she made it through. Addi took Mer home and Mark and I had to waste some time because she wasn't expecting us home until later. When we came home we met Addi in the parking lot. She had gone to get some groceries and when we got to the apartment Addi told us that Mer had said she was going to take a shower as Addi left and she had been gone for 45 minutes or so. The shower was still running so she went in." Derek paused. "She was laying on the floor of the shower crying. Mark and I got her blankets and towels and Addi covered her. I picked her up and took her into my room. I tried to lay her down but she told me she didn't want me to go so I just held her while she cried. That was the first time she cried in front of me and when she was done she talked a little about her life. She opened up. Then she asked me to go with her the next day to the trial. She asked Mark to go the next morning. It was the day that Luke testified but so did her mother."

"What?"

"Yes she testified for Luke. Meredith was devastated. Anyway we all helped her through it and then she left for college." Derek finished quickly not wanting to give away all details of Meredith's past. "She didn't talk to me again until she came back for Addi and Mark's wedding. Ever since then we have talked almost every day. If we can't talk we email and as you know she has come to visit."

"Wow. I know that for Meredith's sake you haven't told me everything and because of that I know you are still the man mom and dad raised you to be."

"She is so stubborn Nancy, she won't let me love her but I do. I know by looking in her eyes that she loves me too but I…"

Nancy cut him off. "You're right."

"What?"

"She loves you. I could see it every time she talked about Mcdreamy and I could see it yesterday in that hospital room. But Derek, she has been hurt so bad maybe she's someone that should only be a friend and not a girlfriend or wife."

"How could you say that? You said she is your friend. I love you Nancy but I am going to marry her so you better accept it."

"Why do you love her Derek, what is it about her that you love?"

Derek stood and started pacing in front of her as he started talking. He told her all about Meredith, his Meredith. The Meredith who he spent those months with after the trial and the Meredith he came to know throughout the years by phone calls, emails, and visits. He also told her about how her and Addi gang up on him and Mark and how she jokes around with them. Once he was done telling her about Meredith he started with what he loves about Meredith. "I love how stubborn she is. I love her giggle and her laugh. And I love her eyes, they sparkle when she smiles and they become this deep gray when she is upset. I love how she pretends to be so strong to everyone even when she is falling apart inside. Don't get me wrong she is strong, the strongest woman I know for all she's been through but I can see the hurt when I look deep in her eyes. I can see everything through her eyes. I love her tiny ineffectual fists and her rambling." Derek pauses and lets out a chuckle. "She is so cute when she rambles. She doesn't talk about her feelings much in fact she avoids most of the time. But I love that when she decides to open up she makes me feel like the luckiest person in the world because she trusted me enough to listen. I love how funny she is. I love that she can put Mark in his place and I love how she got Addi to think of her like a sister and you know how hard Addi can be about other woman. And I love how she doesn't boost my ego, in fact she reminds me almost daily how my ego is too big."

Nancy chuckled at that. "She's right about that."

Derek gave her a glare before continuing. "I love how smart and loyal she is. I love that she has the biggest heart but she will deny it. I love how she fidgets with her watch when she is nervous. I love how she makes me feel when she looks at me. I feel like I can't breathe and I can feel my heart rate pick up. I love how the sound of her voice calms me. And I love how according to Mark and Addi, when I think about her I get a big smile on my face. She makes me want to be a better man for her. I just, I just love everything about her Nancy." Derek finished and looked at Nancy who was staring back at him with a smile. "What?"

Nancy watched as Derek paced in front of her and rambled on and on about Meredith with a smile on his face. A smile came to her lips as she saw how much he really cared about her. The Meredith he was describing was the Meredith she had glimpses of. She was worried that Derek was just wanting to save Meredith and she knew that wouldn't be good for either of them. The more he rambled the more she realized that Meredith was the perfect women for him. "You're rambling."

"I guess it rubbed off on me."

"You and me both." They both shared a laugh. "Ok, let's go."

"Wait I just poured my heart out here and you want to leave now?"

"I just wanted to make sure you loved her and now I know so let's go."

"Oh no you don't, what is that suppose to mean?"

"Derek you have always been the guy that wants to save everyone. You like being the knight in shining armor and well Meredith is dark and twisty as she puts it so I thought you were just wanting to show her the light or something. I really care about both of you and I didn't want either of you to get hurt."

"That is what I said."

"What?"

Derek laughed. "I told Mark one night that I wanted to show her the light."

Nancy laughed at him. "Cheesy."

"You just said it too so I guess cheesy runs in the family. There is so much more to her then dark and twisty and if you give her the time to learn to trust you..she is worth it. I knew that as soon as I met her and I knew that I would get to see the real Mer and there is nothing that I would change about her."

"That's all I needed." Nancy said as she stood and started for the door with Derek following.

"You do realize that you are my sister and therefore you should be grilling her and not me right?"

"I don't have to grill her Derek. She has told me everything about Mcdreamy and now that I know you are him, well I know how she feels about you."

"You do?"

"Yes and Derek if you hurt her…"

Derek cut her off. "I won't and when is everyone going to stop saying that to me?"

"She's a good woman and she deserves to be happy and you are a good man, not a great brother but…"

"Hey what is that suppose to mean?"

"You never came to visit me, not once. Now can I finish?" Nancy paused as Derek nodded. "Good now what I was going to say was you are a good man and you deserve to be happy also. I know now that Meredith is the one that makes you happy and to tell you the truth you two deserve each other."

"Why do you say that?"

"You are both too stubborn for your own good." Nancy smiled as she finished.

"You Nancy are lucky I love you and I wouldn't say that to Mer. She is tiny but she can hold her own."

Derek and Nancy both laughed as they made their way into the hospital and entered the elevator. It was now after 10 by the time they got to Meredith's floor. As they got off the elevator Derek remembered something he forgot to tell Nancy. He stopped her in the hall. "Nancy?"

"Yes."

"Don't tell Mer about Mark and Addi's baby ok?"

"Why not?"

"Just…it's their news to tell so don't say anything ok, promise me you won't say anything?"

Nancy was a little concerned by the look on her brothers face but she agreed and they continued down the hall. They entered her room and found Mark sitting with her. Nancy gave him a hug and kiss on the cheek. "Good morning Mark."

"Morning Nancy, Derek." Mark looked at his watch. "What took you so long? I expected you to be here first thing this morning."

Derek looked at Nancy and then back to Mark as he walked over to Meredith's bed and grabbed her chart. "We would have been except someone had to have a talk. How can she not be awake yet?"

"It was important. So Mark where is Addison?"

"Surgery."

"What is this?" Derek asked with a raised voice.

"What is it Derek?"

"Mark did you see this?"

Mark nodded. "I checked her chart when I came in and saw it. I was going to ask Burke when he comes in to check on her."

"Why didn't you ask a nurse?"

"Because I wanted to know the truth and not gossip and why are you yelling at me?" Mark asked while he stood from his chair.

"What is it Derek?" Nancy questioned again now with worry in her voice.

Derek was about to respond when the door opened and Dr. Burke came in with Dr. Bailey. "Burke what the hell happened?"

Both Burke and Bailey made their way into the room and Burke grabbed the chart away from Derek. "Give me that chart Sheppard, you are not her doctor."

"Fine just tell me what happened."

"First off, lower your voice this is a hospital remember?"

"I'm sorry Miranda, I just want to know what happened."

"It's Dr. Bailey to you and since I was on call last night I will tell you after you sit." She stopped as both Mark and Derek took seats. "That's better. Now, this morning about 5am I got a page. When I got here she was screaming and thrashing around in the bed. Myself and two nurses tried to calm her but it was no use. I ordered her to be sedated. Once she calmed back down I saw that she had popped her stitches so we cleaned her up and I stitched her back up. I am guessing the sedation should wear off in a couple hours."

"Why wasn't I paged? I told the nurses to page me if anything happened to her."

"It wasn't an emergency and I handled it."

"She didn't need to be sedated."

"Dr. Sheppard it was the only way to calm her down and she is fine now."

"Dr. Bailey is right Sheppard, she is doing just fine. I'll be back to check on her later, if anything happens page me." Dr. Burke said as he made some notes in her chart and put it back at the end of her bed. "Now I am headed to surgery so if you all with excuse us."

Everyone said their goodbyes as Dr. Burke and Dr. Bailey left the room. And then Derek spoke. "I should have been here."

"Derek you can't be with her all the time."

"I know that Nancy but I just should have been here."

The room fell into silence until Nancy started up conversation with Mark. Addison came in for a little while until one of her patients went into labor and Mark got paged for a consult. Nancy then decided to go down to the cafeteria for something to eat and she told Derek she would bring something back.

Soon after she left Meredith started to stir. She opened her eyes and saw Derek sitting beside her. "Hey."

Derek saw her open her eyes and smiled. "Hey."

"What time is it?"

"It's after noon. How do you feel?"

"Fine I guess. How long have you been here?"

"Since a little after 10. I have surgery at 2 so I was hoping you would wake up before then. I'm glad you did."

"When can I go home?"

"You've only been here for a day and you do remember you had surgery right?"

"I remember Derek but I feel fine now so when can I leave?"

Derek chuckled because he knew she would want to leave as soon as possible. "I'll tell you what, I'll ask Burke when you can leave if you keep concentrating on getting better."

"Deal."

"Mer, what happened when we left last night?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You know, just tell me."

Meredith sighed. She didn't want to talk about it but she saw the look in Derek's eyes and she knew he wasn't going to drop this. "Two officers came for my statement, I gave it to them and they left that's it."

Derek saw the look in her eyes and then it hit him and he realized what happened. "You had a nightmare didn't you?" She didn't say anything so he tried again. "You popped your stitches Mer and they sedated you, it was a nightmare wasn't it?"

She nodded.

Derek saw the tears that were threatening to fall and as he was holding her hand in one of his he reached the other up and was stroking her hair. "I'm sorry I wasn't here for you."

Meredith moved her head from side to side before looking him back in the eyes. "No Derek you don't need to say you're sorry. You can't be here all the time and I need to learn how to deal with this on my own."

"Mer I know I can't be here all the time and I wasn't with you for a long time but you are back here now and I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." Derek smiled wanting to lighten the mood. "Besides you know you can't get rid of me."

Meredith smiled. "I just want to forget about this."

"I know you do honey but you can't forget. You do have Nancy, Mark, Addi, and myself here now to help you and your other friends are going to be here in a month right?" Derek saw her nod. "We are going to help you through this just remember if you let us I promise it will go faster."

Meredith knew he meant that she had to open up instead of keeping her feelings and thoughts to herself. She looked into his eyes and saw the concern. That's when she decided not to fight this time. "I just…I don't understand why this keeps happening. I thought he was gone why would he come back? And he was going to hurt Nancy Derek. She didn't do anything to him. He blames me for what happened. I can understand that but…I just want…I want a good night's sleep and I want to stop thinking about him and for him to leave me alone." By the time she finished she was crying.

"I can't change what happened and I am happy you saved Nancy but if something more had happened to you I don't know what I would do. Mer you are a strong woman who is going to survive this. You have friends that love you and would do anything for you so whatever you need we are here. Think about everything that you have already been through, everything you have survived. You are going to start your internship soon and you are going to be the best surgeon..." Derek said while wiping her tears.

"Better than you?"

"I didn't say that."

"You said the best so that means better than you Dr. Sheppard." Meredith said with a smile.

"Ok let me change that. You are going to be the second best."

"Oh no there is no rewind button here you cannot take it back. You said best, I'm so going to tell Mark and Addi."

"I'll deny it, who do you think they would believe?"

"Do you really want me to answer that?"

"No."

They both shared a laugh and then Meredith stopped after being reminded that she did just have surgery. "Ouch."

Both still had smiles on their faces. "There is your beautiful smile I miss seeing it every day."

"Thank-you."

"For what?"

"For being you."

They both fell into easy conversation getting caught up on what they had missed since it had been a few days since they had talked.

Nancy, Mark, and Addison were standing at the window watching the two interact. Nancy broke the silence. "She cried."

"What?" Mark questioned.

"She cried. That is the first time I have seen her cry besides when she woke up from a nightmare."

"Derek can always get her to open up like that." Addison said standing next to Mark.

"How, why, and what about you two?"

"Calm down what's with all the questions?"

"Mark I just want to know about my friend and my brother."

Addison grabbed Marks hand silently telling him she would answer which she did. "From the first day Derek met her he said he fell in love with her and Meredith has been through a lot. Derek, Mark, and I were there for her through it all and after."

"Derek told me some of the story. I know he didn't tell me everything but he told me enough."

"Well he's always been able to tell or sense things about her. She's had this weird connection with Derek, he calls it fate, Mark calls it weird, and I call it romantic. Those two can have an entire conversation just by looking into each other's eyes and they know what the other is feeling."

"It's creepy."

"Shut up Mark."

"Seriously?"

Addison and Mark both nodded. "Creepy right?" Mark asked.

Nancy shook her head. "I'm going to go with Addison on this one. I think it is romantic."

Mark rolled his eyes. "Of course you would, you're a woman."

Both Nancy and Addison turned and hit Mark on his arms. "Ouch, what was that for?"

"For being a man honey."Addison said.

Once they heard Mark both Meredith and Derek turned their heads to see Nancy, Mark, and Addison standing at the window. They waived them in and the five of them fell into conversation.

That night Derek stayed with Meredith and when she had her nightmare he crawled into bed with her and held her just like he did when she was living with them. She calmed almost immediately and they both fell asleep.

Derek spent each night with Meredith. Derek, Nancy, Mark, and Addison would spend as much time with Meredith as was possible. About two days later Nancy had gone to get everyone lunch away from the hospital while Derek, Mark, and Addison had stayed with Meredith. That morning, Mark had told Derek they wanted to tell Meredith about the baby so they decided this was the day to do it.

Meredith could tell something was going on as soon as Nancy had volunteered to go get lunch and no one went with her. There was a silence in the room right after she left and Meredith didn't like it. "What's going on?"

"What are you talking about Mer?"

"Don't treat me like I'm stupid Mcsteamy. I have known you all too long and I see the looks you are giving each other." Again she was met with silence. She looked to Derek who was avoiding eye contact but he had given her hand a squeeze. Then she looked again at Mark and he also had avoided eye contact so she decided to push Addison knowing she always broke first. "Addison."

"It's nothing bad Meredith we just didn't know how to tell you."

Now Meredith was really starting to worry and she squeezed Derek's hand a little tighter. "Please just tell me."

Addison smiled and made her way to the other side of Meredith. Once she was there she grabbed her hand as Mark came next to her and put his arm around her shoulders. "Mer Mark and I…" Addison trailed off.

"No anesthesia."

"We are going to have a baby Meredith."

Meredith squeezed Derek's hand again but smiled at the news. "That's great news you two. It's about time, how far along are you?"

"I'm two months along. I actually thought I had the flu at first, I should have known sooner."

"Well they do say doctors make the worst patients."

The four continued to talk about the baby and Derek watched Meredith. He could tell she was happy about the baby but he could also see her sadness. Soon Nancy came back with the food and they all ate. After eating Mark was paged for a consult and Derek had to go into surgery. He told Meredith he would be back later and Addison had to leave as well for a consult leaving Nancy and Meredith alone.

"How long are you going to stay in Seattle?"

"Until I know you are ok. Are you trying to get rid of me?"

Meredith smiled. "No I just think that if you left soon you would have more time to spend with your fiancé."

"That may be true but right now making sure you are ok is more important than spending some more time with my fiancé."

"I'll be sure to mention that to him next time I see him." Meredith said with a smile.

"You can't avoid this."

"What are you talking about?"

"The conversation about my brother."

"Again what are you talking about?"

"Meredith what I told you in the car about my brother saying he was going to marry the girl, I know it scared you."

"Don't be ridiculous Nancy. I knew Derek would get married eventually, I just wish he would have told me about her. We have been friends for a long time and I thought we told each other things so I'm just a little hurt he didn't tell me about her."

"Meredith."

"No it's ok Nancy. I'll ask him about her later so…"

Nancy cut her off. "Meredith Grey stop being so damn stubborn. You know it's you. He was or I was talking about you. You are the woman he is going to marry."

Meredith felt her heart beat rise and she started to panic. "No…I can't…no…you're wrong…he can't…I…I can't…"

Nancy heard her heart rate start to pick up and she saw Meredith grasping for air. "Meredith, calm down, breath, please breath." As she spoke her voice raised seeing that Meredith wasn't calming down. She ran out into the hallway to get help. When she got there she ran into Mark and a nurse that had been coming after hearing the monitor going off. "Mark you need to help her she won't calm down."

Mark had been at the nurses' station when he heard the alarm go off and the nurse said what room it was. He immediately took off to the room and caught Nancy as she came out of the room. "Nancy, what happened, what is going on?" Mark questioned as he went to Meredith's side.

"We were talking and she just started to panic. I tried to get her to calm down but it didn't help."

Mark was standing next to Meredith holding her hand trying to get her to calm down but it wasn't working. The nurse had come in and checked the monitor but left again saying she would be back. Mark was getting nervous watching Meredith seeing that she wasn't calming down. The nurse came back in and was going to give her something. "What is that?"

"Dr. Sloan it's a sedative."

"Don't you dare give her that. Page Sheppard."

"Doctor?"

"You heard me page Sheppard now!"

The nurse ran out of the room and paged him. Nancy couldn't watch her friend so she stepped out into the hall. What felt like seconds she turned when she heard someone running down the hall. She saw Derek and ran towards him.

"What happened?"

"We were talking and she started to panic. She won't calm down Derek." Nancy had tears in her eyes.

"It's ok Nancy, she will be ok. Can you please page Addison?"

Nancy nodded as she took out her phone to page her. She watched as Derek went into the room.

Derek ran to Meredith's other said seeing her grasping for air. "Mark get me some oxygen." Derek grabbed Meredith as Mark ran out of the room. "Sshh Mer, it's ok. I'm here. Calm down honey. Just take deep breaths. Please Mer please calm down, just breath." Derek held her and felt her start to calm down but she still wasn't catching her breath. "I need that oxy…"

Mark had just came back in when he heard Derek. "Here Derek." He handed the oxygen mask to him.

Derek took the mask and immediately held it to Meredith's face. "Here you go, just breath Mer, It's going to be ok honey just breath."

Addison came into the room followed by the nurse and Dr. Bailey. "What is going on here?"

"I think she's having a panic attack Dr. Bailey. Her heart rate has increased and Dr. Sloan tried to calm her but it wasn't working. I was going to give her a sedative to calm her after I paged you but Dr. Sloan demanded I page Dr. Sheppard instead."

"Dr. Sloan, this is my patient where do you get off telling the nurses how to treat my patient?"

"Look Dr. Bailey I don't doubt your abilities however this patient did not need a sedative she just needed her friends and we are here."

"You think just because you are the best plastic surgeon in the country…"

Mark cut her off. "Look she's doing better."

Everyone turned their attention to Derek and Meredith. Derek was still sitting on the bed holding Meredith while she had her hand over his holding the oxygen mask. Meredith's heart rate had come down and her breathing was almost back to normal.

Dr. Bailey saw that everything was under control and decided to leave after reluctantly apologizing to Mark.

After a few more minutes Meredith's breathing and heart rate were back to normal. She dropped the oxygen mask and pulled away from Derek. "I'm alright."

"You're alright." Derek smiled a little hurt that she pulled away from him.

"I'm sorry."

Derek looked to Mark and Addison pleading for help. Since she had pulled away he wasn't sure what to say to her. Mark stepped forward. "It's ok Mer, we were just worried about you. Do you need anything?"

Meredith settled back into the bed. "No, I think…I just want to get some rest."

"Ok Mer, I'll be back after my surgery. I'm going to have Nancy come watch ok?" Meredith nodded and Derek bent down and gave her a kiss on the forehead. He watched as she closed her eyes and he left the room motioning for Mark and Addison to follow.

The three stepped out into the hallway where they found Nancy who still had tears in her eyes. Derek gave her a hug. "She's ok. What happened?"

Nancy pulled back and told them about their conversation they had in the car on the way to Seattle and about the conversation that started Meredith's attack. When she was done she looked back to Derek. "I'm sorry Derek."

"Nancy this isn't your fault. She'll be ok." Derek then turned to Mark and Addison. "Mark do you have a surgery?"

"Yeah, I have two surgeries before I'm off tonight. Why?"

"Addi, what about you?"

"I have a c-section and then I am free."

"Good can you come back and sit with her?"

"I can do it Derek."

"Nancy I thought maybe you could use a break from hospital rooms and come watch your brother in action." Derek saw Nancy's face light up as she nodded. He turned back to Addison. "Addi?"

"Of course I'll come back, and Derek, I'll page you if we need you."

The four all went to their destinations. After a couple hours Addison made her way back to Meredith's room. She was still sleeping so Addison sat for about another hour before Meredith started to stir.

Meredith finally opened her eyes and found Addison sitting with her. "Hi."

"How are you feeling?"

"Fine."

Addison smiled. "You know you can't use that word with me so just tell me the truth."

Meredith sighed and remembered Derek's words from earlier about her letting her friends help her. She decided she'd rather talk about this with Addison than Derek so she told Addison what happened.

Addison listened as Meredith explained what had happened and to Addison's surprise she even told Addison how she felt. When Meredith finished, Addison spoke. "I know what Nancy said scares you but Derek isn't going to hurt you like everyone else has. You deserve to be loved and to be happy. Derek is one of the good ones Meredith and if it wasn't for Mark I would have married him years ago."

Meredith giggled. "Does Mark know this?"

"He usually hears it each time he spends the night on the couch." Addison and Meredith both laughed at this and then they fell into a comfortable silence.

Meredith broke the silence. "Addi, have you ever wanted something so much but were afraid of it at the same time?"

Addison was a little taken back. "You just called me Addi."

"Sorry, Addison."

Addison smiled. "No it's ok it's just that's the first time you've used my nickname I like it." She saw Meredith smile. "Now, what on earth are you talking about?"

"Nothing Addi, I'm still a little tired." Meredith said as she heard Addison's pager go off.

"I have to go. Derek said he would be back after his surgery and if you need anything just page one of us ok." Addison said, when she saw Meredith nod she walked out of the room.

Meredith turned from the door and sighed. "Love, that's what I was talking about."

That night Derek came back to sit with her while Nancy went back to her house. They spent the rest of the week with the same routine. Meredith always had someone with her to keep her occupied. After a week she was discharged. She went back to her house with Nancy. Derek was frustrated that he couldn't be with her but was happy that Nancy was there so she wasn't alone and Mark, Addison, and him visited regularly. Meredith completely healed and after a month Nancy went to New York for her internship. Meredith enjoyed the time alone to relax. Finally the night came for the intern mixer. Meredith met up with Alex, Christina, Izzie, and George. Eventually they went back to her house and spent half the night catching up before her friends left for the night and Meredith tried to get some sleep.

Finally morning came and it was time to start her internship.

_**Thank-you for all your reviews! **I hope you are still enjoying the story. Please review and let me know what you think if you have time. **Thank-you again!** _


	13. Chapter 13

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 13

"So how is your first day going?"

"You're kidding right?"

Derek smirked and sat down next to Meredith as Mark approached and sat on the other side of her. Mark had a smile on his face as he spoke. "What's the matter Mer, can't handle being an intern?"

"Oh I can handle being an intern it's Katie Bryce I can't handle. She is driving me crazy and if I wasn't a doctor I would…"

"This sucks!" Alex said as he slammed his tray down on the table.

"I can't believe I haven't cut anyone yet." Christina said as she slammed her tray down next to Alex.

"Burke hates me!" George said as he and Izzie both joined the table taking seats.

"Don't hold back tell us how your day is really going." Derek said with a smile at the other four interns.

"Shut up Mcdreamy." Christina snapped and then turned to Mark. "And don't you dare say a word Mcsteamy."

Mark leaned in to Meredith and lowered his voice. "What's got her panties in a bunch?"

Meredith giggled as she looked at her friends. She saw Izzie wasn't eating. "Izzie why aren't you eating?"

"I can't eat, I've been doing rectal exams all morning. The Nazi hates me."

"So you have a resident who hates you, I have an attending who hates me."

"Quit your complaining Bambi. I've been in the pit all day and it's boring as hell." Alex grumbled.

"Good afternoon interns. I get to pick who is scrubbing in on their first surgery and I just thought you would want to know who I picked. O'Maley, I'll see you in the OR in 2 hours. Dr. Shepherd, Dr. Sloan." Preston Burke said as he walked by and then nodded to Derek and Mark.

All eyes went to George. "How did Bambi get the first surgery?"

"Seriously! I've been running my ass off, how did you get the first surgery?" Christina shot out.

"Well he obviously earned it, Alex and Christina get over yourself already." Izzie snapped.

Now all eyes went to Izzie. Christina's eyes were wide. "Did you forget your happy pills today Barbie?"

"Christina." Meredith said and then looked back to Izzie. "Iz are you ok?"

Izzie gave her a small smile. "Yeah I'm good I guess I've done about 20 too many rectals today." Izzie stopped as she saw the figure approaching the table. "Chief, how are you?"

Richard Webber made his way around the table and stood next to Derek so that he could see everyone at the table. "Hello doctors."

Meredith straightened up at the mention of the chief. She had been avoiding him all day and she was hoping to continue for as long as possible. Of course fate was not on her side because now he was standing at their table. She kept her eyes down and hoped he would continue on his way and not speak to her. Yet again, fate was against her.

"Dr. Grey how is your mother?"

Meredith's head shot up. "That's none of your business Dr. Webber." Meredith then stood from her chair still looking at him. "If I recall correctly you have a wife. How is Adele anyway? Your business is her, not my mother." With that Meredith turned and stormed away.

All occupants at the table shared looks and then turned to Dr. Webber.

Dr. Webber was in shock. He thought of Meredith as a daughter and the look in her eyes just now was not anything he had seen before. He felt the looks on him and he quickly excused himself from the table.

"What the hell was that?" Alex asked.

"I'm going to find Mer." Derek said as he quickly got up and went after Meredith.

Derek had tried paging her but she did not answer. He remembered one of their conversations when she had told him her favorite spot in the hospital whenever she had to come wait for her mother had been the roof. She had told him that she liked the view and that it helped her think. He made his way to the top of the hospital and slowly opened the door. He stepped out and softly closed the door behind him. When he took a couple steps forward he saw her looking out over Seattle.

He approached her. "Mer, what was that about?"

Meredith didn't turn to face him knowing if she did she would break because he was Derek. Through the years as their friendship grew she realized she was comfortable telling him more and more about her. It scarred her that she put that much trust in one person but he hasn't betrayed her and it was easy to talk to him. This was something she had kept from him and knew she couldn't tell him no matter how much she wanted to. "It's nothing."

"It's not nothing. I've never heard you talk to Richard like that."

"Derek."

Derek stepped in front of her so that she was looking at him. He paused for a second when he saw the tears that were threatening to fall. "Don't Derek me. What is it Mer?"

"Derek as my friend I have been trying to open up to you but there are still some things that I can't tell you, please don't push this."

"If you are upset about something I want to help you."

Meredith was trying to come up with a way to change the subject when her pager sounded. She looked down and quickly turned and made her way to the door. "Sorry Derek it's a 911. I'll talk to you later."

"Saved by the page." Derek sighed. He knew she was hiding something and he started to think of what it could be. While he was thinking he looked out over the city. He couldn't believe he hadn't been up there yet, the view was amazing. And he realized Meredith was right it does help you think. After about 15 minutes he realized he should head back in. He turned and started making his way to the door when his pager went off and he started running down the stairs. He quickly made his way to the patients room. "What the hell happened?"

Meredith looked up. "She started seizing and…"

Derek grabbed the chart and started checking the patient while yelling at Meredith.

Meredith made her way out of the room and as she was walking down the hall she ran into the Nazi who also started yelling at her. Meredith kept walking and made her way to an on call room. She decided she would lay down until she was paged since she knew she didn't do anything wrong.

A couple hours later and Meredith was in the gallery with the others watching George's surgery. The surgery was successful and after the old friends all decided to go to Joe's after their shifts to celebrate. Meredith agreed but said she would meet them there.

Meredith entered Joe's and made her way to the bar where she found her friends. "Hey guys."

"Hey Mer you made it."

"Of course I did Iz, I told you I would."

"So have you thought anymore about us moving in with you?"

"I don't know George that means we would be with each other for almost 24 hours don't you think that's a bit much?"

"Meredith we have been friends for years it won't hurt if we live together."

"What's the matter Mer, is your mother going to be coming back?"

"My mother has nothing to do with this Christina."

"Then just let them move in, you know you will cave eventually and I would like to enjoy my drink instead of listening to Barbie and Bambi whine all night."

Meredith looked at her friends trying to make her decision.

"You know Izzie can cook Meredith so you won't starve."

Meredith smiled. "I wouldn't starve anyways Alex."

Three others had approached the five interns. "She's right Alex, Grilled cheese and cold pizza for breakfast is not starving."

Meredith, Alex, Christina, Izzie, and George all turned to see Derek, Mark, and Addison join them. "Thank-you Mark."

"You may not starve Mer but it's not healthy."

"I am perfectly healthy the way I am." Meredith replied to Derek and still looked around to all her friends. She decided it would be nice not to be alone. "Okay, Iz you and George can move in."

Both Izzie and George jumped out of their seats, cheered, and hugged Meredith. They others all chuckled at the interaction.

The next day Izzie and George moved in. The few weeks that followed kept everyone busy at the hospital. Meredith grew closer to Derek however she still insisted it was only friendship. Derek had tried on many different occasions to get her to tell him what was going on with Richard but she wouldn't budge.

"Come on Mer we are going to be late."

"I'm coming Derek I just need to grab my purse. I don't see why we couldn't just go to a restaurant or something." Meredith said as she came down the stairs and her and Derek went out to his car.

"Because Addi was very specific about us going to their house. She wanted to cook and you haven't seen their new house since you got back to Seattle."

"I tried to stop by last month but there was that 10 car pileup and we all got called in. I can't believe she is 5 months already."

"I can't believe Mark is going to be a father. It's kind of scary."

Meredith laughed. "Yeah a little but I think he will be a good father just like you."

"What?"

"You've told me you want kids, I listen to everything you tell me Derek."

"Right, good to know. So what do you think is so important that they couldn't talk to us at the hospital?"

"I don't know but I hope everything is alright."

Derek pulled up to the house and they both went to the door. Mark let them in and after the tour they all sat down for dinner.

"This is really good Addi."

"Thank-you, I had a craving for spicy."

They finished dinner and after everything was cleaned up they made their way to the living room. Mark brought drinks for everyone and they all sat down and started talking.

"So what is it?"

Mark and Addison looked at each other and smiled. "I'm impressed you made it through dinner." Mark said with a smirk.

"He was trying to figure it out on the way here." Meredith added.

"Mer you want to know just as much as I do." Derek whined.

"That may be true however I am not as impatient as you are."

"No you're just stubborn."

"No more than you."

While the two carried on their bickering Mark leaned over to Addison and whispered. "They are just like an old married couple."

"I don't think it will be too much longer before they are, that's why we chose them."

"I know but it's almost painful to watch them like this."

"Oh shut up, you're just jealous."

"I have nothing to be jealous of."

"Good answer."

"Thank-you now can you put a stop to them?"

Addison laughed and gave Mark a kiss. She then turned back to Meredith and Derek. "Alright alright, enough."

Meredith and Derek stopped talking and turned their attention back to Mark and Addison who had smiles on their faces. "So?" Both of them said.

Mark and Addison joined hands. "We are going to have a girl." Mark said with a huge smile on his face.

Derek and Meredith both stood to congratulate them. "That's great Addi, do you have a name?"

"Lillian Rose Sloan."

"Lilly for short." Addi replied after Mark.

"That is great guys. So why did you have to have Mer and I over for dinner just to tell us that?"

"Derek!"

"It's a valid question Mer. They could have told us at the hospital."

"I'm sorry for him guys, I don't know what's gotten into him."

"No need to apologize for him Mer. Derek has been like that since I saved his butt on the playground."

"You did not save my butt, I saved yours."

"Enough enough. Alright Mr. Impatient, we just wanted Mer to see the house."

"What?" Derek asked.

Both Mark and Addison smiled. After a couple minutes Mark spoke. "The reason we wanted to have you guys for dinner is because we wanted to ask you both something."

Derek and Meredith both looked at each other and then turned their attention back to Mark to continue.

"Would you be Lilly's godparents?"

Derek smiled and responded immediately. "I would be honored." He stood and hugged his two friends.

Addison gave Derek a hug and then turned her attention to Meredith who was still sitting with a look of shock. She stepped around Derek and sat next to her. "Mer?"

Meredith turned to Addison and blinked. "I…I can't." She responded in a whisper.

Mark and Derek had now turned their attention to the two women sitting next to each other.

"What do you mean you can't Mer?"

"Addi, godparents should be…they need to be…and I'm not…I don't know…I can't."

"Meredith I don't understand what you are saying. Take a breath and use your words."

Meredith took a deep breath and still looking in Addison's eyes explained herself still in a whisper. "Godparents should be together, married. They need to love each other so that if anything happens to you and Mark they will be able to take care of Lilly. They would need to teach her love. Addi, I can't teach her that. I am honored that you would ask me but I can't." Meredith finished with tears in her eyes.

Addison saw the hurt in Meredith's eyes and she pulled her in for a hug. As she was giving her a hug she whispered to her. "Mer, godparents do not need to be married. You can do this."

Meredith pulled back and wiped her tears. She looked over and saw Derek and Mark watching her. She looked back at Addison and decided she needed to get out of there. She stood and ran into the kitchen.

Derek went to follow her but Addison stopped him. "Let me go Derek." Addison saw Derek nod and she went to the kitchen. When she got there she saw Meredith sitting at the island with her head in her hands. She approached Meredith and put her hand on her shoulder. "Mer."

Meredith lifted her head and looked to Addison with tears still rolling down her cheeks. "I'm sorry."

"Mer why do you keep doing this?"

Meredith didn't know what to think of Addison's question. "Doing what?"

"Hurting yourself."

"Addi please."

"No Meredith it's time we have this talk. We should have had it years ago and I'm sorry we didn't. You asked me if I have ever wanted something so much but were afraid of it at the same time, do you remember that?"

Meredith nodded and then asked. "What does that have to do with this, with me?"

Addison ignored Meredith's question and continued. "My answer is yes I have. I wanted a child. I have that now and it still scares the crap out of me but I am so happy that I am going to be a mother and that Mark is beside me. Meredith I heard your answer that day."

"What?"

"I got paged but the door hadn't closed all the way when you answered. Do you remember what you said?"

Meredith nodded.

"What did you say Meredith?"

Meredith didn't answer instead she stood and went to the sink to look out the window.

"Meredith what is it that you want so much but are afraid of?" Addison asked as she saw the door to the kitchen being pushed open a little further.

"Meredith?"

"Addi I know you are trying to help but this isn't helping." Meredith said without turning around.

Addison pushed again knowing it was the only way to get through to Meredith. "Meredith, what is it that you are afraid of?"

Meredith turned around and looked right at Addison. "Love alright, love."

"Why?"

"Because it hurts, because it takes from you, because it leaves you, and because it tells you that you aren't good enough." Meredith said through her tears.

"What are you talking about?"

"Luke, he said he loved me but he hurt me. My father, he said he loved me but he left me and never looked back. My mother, she's suppose to love me right? She has always told me I'm not good enough no matter what I have done. At least she never told me she loved me. I'm better off without love."

"Then why do you want it so much?"

"Because I see what you and Mark have and I think sometimes it would be nice to feel that but I can't, I will never feel that because of who I am."

"Meredith you have it."

"I would rather be alone than feel the kind of love, Addi."

Addison had made her way to Meredith and grabbed her shoulders. "Meredith Grey, you do have the kind of love that Mark and I have you just need to let yourself feel it."

Meredith shook her head. "No Addi, no I don't."

Addison smiled a small smile as she spoke. "I know you are stubborn Mer but I don't believe you are stupid."

"What are you talking about?"

"Derek."

"No we are…he's just…we're friends."

"No Mer, Derek and I are friends. You and Mark are friends. Derek and you are more than friends, you have been for years."

"No, I'm not good enough for Derek. We're friends."

"I know he told you he loved you before you went to college."

"He was…no that was a mistake."

"I've known Derek longer than you have and I know for a fact he doesn't say I love you to anyone as a mistake. Come to think of it I don't think he has said it to anyone other than Mark, myself, or anyone else in his family."

"Addi I don't…"

Addison cut her off. "Let him teach you. What did I say to you in the hospital?"

Meredith had dried her tears and was thinking about what Addison had been saying the entire time and after her last question she looked back up at Addison and smiled. "You said, Derek isn't going to hurt me like everyone else has. You also said I deserve to be loved and to be happy. Then you said, Derek is one of the good ones and if it wasn't for Mark you would have married Derek years ago."

"Right you could have left the last part off." Addison said, glancing to the door and back to Meredith. "My point is, I see the way you look at him and I think you know the kind of love we have been talking about better than you think. I know Derek loves you and I know for a fact he won't hurt you."

"How do you know?"

"Because if he does…Mark, myself, Nancy, Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George will kill him."

"George?" Meredith giggled.

"I'm sure he can supervise." Addison smiled.

"Actually he was pretty scary and it's usually the quiet ones that you should be afraid of." Derek said as he and Mark entered the kitchen.

Meredith looked to Derek. "Threatened, George?"

"Yes George, all of them, everyone she mentioned has had a conversation with me about hurting you." Derek said as he made his way to Meredith and stood in front of her. "I told them and I'll tell you. I love you Meredith Grey and I promise with all my heart that I am not ever going to intentially hurt you. I would rather die."

"Intentionally?" Meredith asked.

"Well I'm not perfect." Derek said with a smile.

"Understatement." Mark coughed from behind and all eyes turned to him. "I've been saying that for years."

Addison smiled and turned to Meredith who was still standing beside her. "What these two mean is that Derek is a man which means he may be sleeping on the couch or over at our house a few nights."

Meredith nodded her understanding.

"Meredith." Derek said to get her attention. "Will you let me teach you?"

Meredith looked into his eyes and then turned to Addison who had a smile on her face. She turned back to Derek and saw Mark over his shoulder also with a smile on his face. She pulled her attention back to Derek's eyes and she let herself get pulled into them. The longer she stared into them she could tell that Derek was different than the others and she finally admitted to herself that Derek was the one to show her what true love was. A smile came to her face and she nodded to Derek.

Derek pulled her in for a hug. After a minute she pulled back and he leaned down and kissed her.

Addison made her way to Mark and placed her arm around him. "They are going to be okay."

"You did good with her."

"Thank-you, Lilly wants her godparents happy and together."

"I agree and I know her mommy and daddy do as well." Mark paused and gave Addison a kiss. When he pulled back he said a little louder. "Now what was this about you marring Derek?"

Addison smiled at him and blushed. "Hmm."

Meredith giggled and then spoke up. "She did say she would marry him if it wasn't for you."

"Don't worry Mark it never would have worked out with Addi and I, I don't go for red heads." Derek said with a smile as he hugged Meredith closer and he heard Meredith giggle.

"Right, now that's settled back to the real reason for this gathering tonight."

"You mean it wasn't to get Meredith and Derek together?"

Addison hit Mark in the arm. "No that was just an added bonus." She said with a smile. "Anyway, Derek and Meredith would you be Lilly's godparents?"

All eyes went to Meredith who pulled away from Derek and approached Addison and Mark. "I would be honored." Meredith said as she pulled Addison into a hug and whispered, "Thank-you."

Addison smiled and replied back, "Your welcome." As she winked to Derek over Meredith's shoulder.

Meredith then gave Mark a hug as well.

The four friends went back to the living room and started a less serious discussion.

"When are you leaving for New York Mer?"

"3 weeks. Nancy wants me to be there a week before the wedding to help with finishing touches."

"What about you Derek?"

"I have to go at the same time."

"You don't sound too happy about that?"

"Would you be Mark, if you had to spend a week with all my sisters and my mother doing wedding stuff?"

"Oh quit your whining, your brother-in-laws will be there so it won't be just you Derek."

Addison and Mark both laughed at the look on Derek's face. "She's right Derek and besides everyone will get to really meet Mer. You have been wanting that to happen for years."

Derek smiled at what Mark had said and then noticed the nervous look on Meredith's face. He wrapped his arm around her shoulders. "Don't worry Mer they will love you. Besides mom met you at Mark and Addi's wedding and she thought you were adorable."

"It's different now Derek and besides your whole family will be there."

"Don't worry Mer, Mark and I will be there with you."

Meredith smiled. "You will?"

"Of course we will. Mark is an honorary Sheppard and Mrs. Sheppard pretty much adopted me when we all started med school since Derek brought me home with him and Mark a few times. You have nothing to worry about."

"I'm glad you guys are coming. I know Nancy was disappointed when she couldn't come to your wedding. Although I didn't know it was your wedding at the time." Meredith said with a smile.

The next three weeks went by quickly and soon it was time to go to New York. Derek and Mark had managed to get tickets all on the same flight and they were going to stay at the same hotel which made Meredith and Addison very happy.

When they landed in New York Derek's family was there to meet them. Meredith was introduced to everyone and to her surprise it wasn't as bad as she had thought it would be.

Derek's family welcomed Meredith with open arms. The week flew by and the wedding went off with no problems. The next day everyone met at the Sheppard house so that the men could go golfing and the women were going to spend the morning shopping. It was the last day that everyone would be together since Nancy and her husband were leaving for their honeymoon and Meredith, Derek, Mark, and Addison would be going back to Seattle in two days.

_**Thank-you for your reviews! **There are still a few things that need to happen with this story before it ends so please let me know if you are still reading and enjoying the story. I hope you review and let me know what you think if you have time. **Thank-you again!** _


	14. Chapter 14

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

_Chapter 14_

Addison and Meredith were sitting on a bench outside a store waiting for the rest of Derek's family to finish shopping. Addison had noticed Meredith's quiet behavior and took this opportunity to ask her about it. "Mer, what is it?"

Meredith turned to look at Addison. "What?"

"You've been quiet all morning, what's bothering you?"

"It's nothing."

"Please, it's been a long morning. Thanks to Lilly, I spent an hour kneeling over the toilet after I woke up, my feet are killing me, I am tired, and I haven't found anything I like. I can drag it out of you but I really don't have the energy today so please give me a break and just tell me."

Meredith sighed. "We tried again last night."

"You tried what?"

"S-E-X."

"OH…I take it things didn't go to well, what happened?"

"The same thing that has happened every time we try I freeze and start to cry. And Derek did the same thing that he always does. He just pulled me into his arms, said it would be okay, and let me cry myself to sleep. Addi I can tell it's bothering him. He is being so patient with me but I can tell. What if I'm never ready? I care about Derek so much Addi but I can see this is killing him. He wants a real relationship, he deserves a real relationship and I'm so scared I can't give that to him."

"He loves you Mer that's all that's important to him." Addison paused looking at Meredith and then continued. "You didn't look panicked when I said he loves you."

"I've heard him say it many times. I know he does."

"He's said it to you since you've been back?"

"Not really to me, he has said it before he goes to bed, usually when he thinks I'm sleeping. It's funny, everyone keeps telling me I'm a bad liar however no one can ever tell when I'm really not sleeping."

Addison smiled. "Don't be so sure of that. Listen Mer I can only imagine how you feel but you have to remember that Derek does love you and he is not going to hurt you. Derek is big on the talking, maybe surprise him and get him to talk about this. If he knows your feelings I know he would do everything in his power to help you."

Meredith nodded as the rest of the Sheppard's came out of the store. Looking at the time they headed back to the house to wait for the guys.

The women had made it back to the house and were having coffee waiting for all the men to return from their golfing trip so they could go to lunch. Meredith had her cell phone and was texting Derek.

"You know he is going to get into trouble for using that right?"

Meredith looked up to Nancy. "Texting is quiet so it won't disturb anyone."

"Leave her alone Nancy, I think it's cute."

"You would Anna."

"Stop it you two. I use to keep track of your father the same way."

"I keep track of Mark, how else would I know if he needs to sleep on the couch or not?"

All the women chuckled. "So where are they Mer?"

"They just finished the last hole about 15 minutes ago, Derek said they should be home in about 10 minutes."

"Good, I'm getting hungry."

"Shopping all morning will do that to you Rebecca."

"Thank-you for the information Kathleen I had no idea." Rebecca paused for a second before continuing. "So Kathleen have you had any interesting patents recently?"

Kathleen smiled. "I do have a new patent. He came to me about two weeks ago. I feel sorry for him because he said he lost his family."

Everyone's attention was on Kathleen even Meredith's who was now standing by the fireplace with a cup of coffee in her hands. She was listening but as Anna asked her question something in the pit of her stomach told her she didn't want to hear anymore and she gripped the coffee cup tighter.

"So what did he do?"

"He hasn't told me his entire story yet since I've only seen him twice. He said he slept with a girl and she claimed it was rape so he was sent to jail. He got out and then ran into her and there was an accident. Anyway, he turned himself in. I guess after the investigation he was let go and now he is trying to get his life back on track and he wants my help."

"What was an accident?"

"An attempted robbery gone wrong in a jewelry store and someone was shot."

As soon as the words came out of Kathleen's mouth Meredith's grip on the coffee cup was lost and it fell to the floor shattering into pieces with a puddle of coffee. She felt as if time had stopped and the air sucked out of her.

Addison was at her side immediately knowing what had happened. She grabbed Meredith's elbow and led her to the couch. "Come sit down Meredith."

Meredith allowed Addison to lead her to the couch and she sat down. She looked up to Addison with tears running down her cheeks and struggling to breathe she spoke. "It's…I can't…I know…"

"Mer, it's okay just breath for me. You need to calm down and breathe Mer."

"It's…I can't…I know…this can't…Kathleen."

Addison sat next to her on the couch and pulled her in to a hug gently rocking her in the process. "It's okay Mer just breathe. You need to breathe Mer."

"It's…Kathleen…I can't…I know…this can't."

Addison had seen Rebecca and Mrs. Sheppard both come closer and Kathleen had brought in a glass of water. Addison continued softly trying to calm Meredith down but nothing was working and she was getting worse. She looked up to Nancy in a panic. "Call Derek."

"We should take her to the hospital."

Nancy looked from her mother back to Meredith and then back to Addison. She gave a quick nod and stepped out of the room grabbing the phone and quickly dialing a familiar number. There was no answer and she made her way back into the living room. "There was no answer but he should be back any minute."

Addison looked down at Meredith who was shaking and having difficulty breathing. "Mer, Derek is on his way. You need to calm down and breathe." As Addison paused she listened to Meredith but all that came from her were more sobs. "Nancy you need to try Derek again."

"I've tried but there is no…their here, they just pulled in." Nancy said as she ran out of the living room and out to the cars that just pulled in the driveway. She immediately went to Derek who was just getting out of the car. "Derek where is your phone…hurry it's Mer."

As soon as he heard Nancy mention Meredith he took off into the house with Mark right behind him. He came into the living room and immediately sat next to Meredith. He pulled her into him arms. "Mer, breathe for me honey." He looked over Meredith's head to Addison. "What happened?"

"Not now Derek."

"Mer I need you to breathe for me, come on you can do this just breathe for me."

"It's…I can't…Kathleen…I know…this can't…I can't."

"Meredith breathe please just breathe for me."

"Derek…Kath…Kathleen…you have too…he can't…hurt…help her…"

To say Derek was confused was an understatement. He looked over to Kathleen who was standing next to Rebecca, Anna, and his mother. None of them said anything but Derek could see that they were all worried about Meredith. He kneeled in front of her and took her face in his hands. "Meredith. Look. At. Me."

Meredith opened her eyes and looked into his blue ones.

"I need you to breathe for me."

"Derek…you have…"

"Meredith you need to breathe…follow me. Deep breath in…deep breath out."

Meredith looked into Derek's eyes and followed him. Soon her breaths started to get back to normal and Derek took his spot back on the couch holding her. He held her tight as he was rocking her like a child. Derek could still hear whimpers coming from her and he held her tighter and continued to talk to her quietly.

After what felt like hours Derek felt Meredith's hold on him loosen slightly and he looked to Mark who was sitting in front of Addison on the coffee table. "Is she sleeping?" Mark nodded. "I'm going to take her up to my old room."

Again Mark nodded and this time Addison spoke softly. "We'll go with to make sure she is settled, then we can talk."

Derek nodded and stood while keeping Meredith in his arms. She shifted but did not wake up as the four left the room.

After about 15 minutes Derek, Mark, and Addison returned to the living room. They took seats along with Derek's sisters and mother. "Where are your husband's?"

"They took the kids to the park so we have the house to ourselves."

"Thank-you Nancy." Derek paused and took a deep breath before continuing. "What happened?"

"I don't know Derek I was telling everyone about one of my patients and she dropped her coffee cup and started to hyperventilate." Kathleen replied with tears in her eyes. "Is she okay?"

Derek nodded and Addison answered. "She will be. She is still sleeping."

"Why was she concerned about Kathleen?"

"Derek do you still have the card I gave you for Officer Phillips?"

"Yes," Derek said getting it out of his wallet and handing it to Addison. "What do you need that for Addison?"

"We need to call him." Addison placed the card on the table in front of her and then turned back to Derek. "Kathleen was telling us about her newest patient. She told us that he had sex with a girl and she claimed it was rape so he was sent to jail. She also told us that he got out and then ran into her and something happened about it being an accident and he turned himself in and after the investigation he was let go so now he is trying to get his life back on track and he wants her help." Addison saw Derek about to talk when she stopped him. "We didn't ask his name and we can't. We need to call Officer Phillips and let him talk to Kathleen. Derek if…we can't do anything without the police knowing first."

Nancy stepped forward. "You think it's him?"

"What is going on here?"

"Addi call the officer." Derek said and Addison stood and left the room. He then turned to his mother, "I promise I will tell you as soon as Addi gets back."

Minutes later Addison came back into the room and asked for Kathleen to join her. After a few more minutes both women returned to the living room. "Officer Phillips is going to fly out tonight and meet with the local police. He knows what has been said so far and since no names have been used everything will be okay. Kathleen doesn't know what 'he' looks like so at this point we don't know if her patient really is who we want him to be."

"Good, that's good."

"Will one of you please let us in on what has caused Meredith to have what looked like a panic attack in my living room and why did you call the police?" Mrs. Sheppherd asked.

"There's no easy way to say this."

"Just start from the beginning like you told me Derek."

"Nancy's right and if you need Mark or I to help you we will." Addison said as she gave him a small smile.

"Okay…" Derek told his mother and sisters everything that had to do with Luke, leaving out his name. Mark and Addison had to jump in a couple times and when it got to the Jewelry store Nancy took over. Once the story was complete there was silence.

"She saved your life Nancy." Anna said in disbelief.

"And she was worried about me." Kathleen added.

"As long as we have known Meredith she has always put others before herself. It's one of the things about her that I love." Derek softly said.

"That pour child. She has been through so much. Derek, you better not hurt her."

After Mrs. Shepperds last words Mark and Addison chuckled which caused Derek to join in and erase some of the seriousness in the room.

"What's so funny?" Rebecca asked.

The three quieted and Mark answered. "Basically everyone that cares about Meredith has threatened Derek harm if he hurts her. Hearing you do the same thing mom it's just, it was funny."

Mrs. Shepperd smiled and went over to give Derek a hug. "Thanks mom, I'm glad you like her and I promise I won't hurt her. I love her." Derek said to his mother and sisters.

"NO KATHLEEN…PLEASE NO!"

Derek head shot towards the stairs and he immediately stood and started running. "Meredith." Kathleen and Mrs. Shepperd following close behind.

Mark stood along with Addison and he turned to her. "Don't you dare run up those stairs. We'll make sure she is okay and then I'll come down." He saw Addison nod and then he ran up the stairs.

Derek got to the door of his old room and still could hear Meredith. He knew it was another dream but it had been a long time since she screamed out like that and he was worried. He pushed open the door and saw her on the bed like she was trying to fight someone off her.

"No…I'M SORRY DEREK…I COULDN'T…KATHLEEN…"

Derek rushed into the room and immediately went to her side. He gently woke her up and she started crying in his arms. "Ssh it's okay Mer. You are safe here, it's okay."

Meredith listened to his voice and the tears slowed. "I'm sorry I couldn't save her Derek…I wouldn't…You…He…"

"Sshh Mer it's okay. Who couldn't you save?"

"Kathleen. He killed her because I couldn't kill you Derek. I'm so sorry but I…I couldn't lose you." Meredith said still sobbing in Derek's arms.

"Mer it was just a nightmare. Kathleen is here she's fine. It's okay Mer she's safe."

Meredith calmed in Derek's arms. She looked up at him, "He's back and he knows Kathleen, Derek what if he hurts her?"

"Mer he doesn't know Kathleen has any connection to you and right now we don't even know if it is him. Officer Phillips is flying in tonight and then we will know."

"I know it's him Derek."

"Oh Mer I wish I could make this better for you."

"He just needs to be back in jail and then I will be safe again and everything will be back to normal."

"Mer the nightmares never stopped. He was in jail and the nightmares never stopped. Maybe…maybe you should talk to someone."

"Derek I'll be fine once he's in jail."

"Mer."

"Derek please I don't want to talk about this anymore. I made a complete fool out of myself in front of your family and…"

"You did no such thing." Mrs. Shepperd said as she stepped into the room and came to sit next to Meredith on the bed opposite of Derek.

Meredith pulled herself out of Derek's arms and dried her tears. "I'm sorry Mrs. Shepperd."

Mrs. Shepperd grabbed one of Meredith's hands before speaking. "You don't have anything to be sorry for Meredith." She looked over and saw Derek watching Meredith. "Derek honey, why don't you go down and get Meredith some tea?"

"Mom, Mer needs me right now I don't want to leave her."

"I am here with her Derek she will be okay for the five minutes it will take you now go."

"Mom…" Derek started to protest again.

"Derek. Tea. Now."

Derek saw the look on his mothers face and heard her tone. Knowing he was being told to leave the room he stood and gave Meredith a kiss on the head. "I'll be right back." Then he stepped out of the room.

"Good now that we have some privacy I wanted to talk to you. Derek told us what happened and…I want to thank-you for what you did for Nancy."

"You don't have to thank me Mrs. Sheppard, I would have don't that for anyone. He wanted to hurt me…I wouldn't stand by and let him hurt someone else."

"All the same thank-you. You have no reason to feel embarrassed over what happened."

"I shouldn't have reacted like that and I'm sorry you had to see that."

"Never apologize for how you need to deal with what has happened." Mrs. Sheppard said with conviction.

"Thank-you Mrs. Sheppard."

"You're welcome Meredith and how about you call me Elizabeth? You are part of our family now and I want to share something with you."

Meredith nodded but didn't say anything.

Mrs. Shepperd squeezed Meredith's hand. "I went through what you are going through."

"What?"

"Not exactly but I was attacked, in college." Mrs. Shepperd held Meredith's eyes as she continued. "It was my freshman year. I was walking home from the library one night and someone came up from behind me. He grabbed me and pulled me into the bushes. He threw me to the ground, ruffed me up a little, and tried to rape me. Before he could, he was pulled off me. That's how I met Michael."

"Did he…"

"No. Michael was walking by and he heard my cries. He came over and pulled the guy off me. The guy ran away while Michael checked on me. The cops came and Michael went with me to the hospital and then took me home. He never pushed me for anything and we became friends. Eventually we became more."

"The guy..what happened to him?"

"He was never caught. I don't think Michael ever got over the fact that he got away, he always blamed himself. I would have liked for him to have been caught but it didn't happen and I certainly wasn't going to blame anyone."

Meredith was shocked by what she was hearing but she now felt a connection to Mrs. Sheppard. She was talking to someone who had gone through something similar. "How…how did you get over it?"

"At first, the nightmares were terrible, for a long time. Michael was always there for me, he comforted me, held me while I cried, and wiped away my tears when I was done. I trusted him and once I admitted to myself that I loved him as much as he loved me I was able to give myself to him. We were married 2 years later and two years after that Kathleen was born."

Meredith had tears flowing down her face. "I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"I'm not."

"What?"

"I went through what I needed to so that I ended up here. I have had a wonderful life and I have a wonderful family. Of course I would have liked for Michael and I to have met under different circumstances but that wasn't how it was meant to be. I know I wasn't raped like you but Meredith I know you can get through this."

"I will be fine once he is back in jail."

"Meredith I heard Derek. It's been over 10 years and you still are having nightmares."

"I'll be fine once he's in jail." Meredith repeated as she forced a smile.

"The pain in your eyes tells me differently." Mrs. Shepperd saw the shocked look on Meredith's face. "I saw the pain the first time I met you at Mark and Addison's wedding. Derek was right about you, your eyes don't hide anything."

"I…he's the only one who can tell…"

"Honey he learned it from his father. The Sheppard men have a way of seeing into a women's soul and knowing everything. It's part of the reason for the cockiness and the look."

"You know about the look?"

"I'm immune to Derek's but Michael got me every time." Mrs. Sheppard chuckled. "Don't be so surprised. I love him dearly but I'm his mother, if I hadn't caught on when he was three he would have been a terrible child."

Meredith smiled. "What about Mark?"

"Well he's been part of our family since they were in kindergarten. I guess Michael and Derek taught it to him. Just don't tell him I know."

Meredith smiled however it didn't last long as she looked back up to Mrs. Sheppard. "Derek never told me how you met Dr. Sheppard."

"We never told the kids. I'm not ashamed of what happened we just weren't sure how they would react."

"I won't say anything."

"It's okay Meredith, I think maybe it's time they know."

"No Mrs. Sheppard you don't have to do that. I'm fine and I don't want you to have to go through it again."

"Meredith if there's one thing I have learned is that it helps to talk about it. Don't worry, I'll handle them." Mrs. Sheppard squeezed Meredith's hands. "What about your mother Meredith? Have you talked to her about this?"

Meredith turned her eyes down. "My mom testified for him. She said I caused it or something, she didn't believe me."

"Meredith you did not cause the rape or the shooting." Mrs. Shepperd said as she pulled her in for a hug. She had heard of Ellis Grey and she knew from Michael that she was driven and cold when it came to her career. As a mother she couldn't believe that Ellis Grey could carry that same coldness to her own daughter. At that moment Mrs. Shepperd had an immense hatred towards Ellis.

Meredith cried into Mrs. Shepperds shoulder.

After a few minutes Meredith pulled away and dried her tears. "Thank-you Elizabeth."

"You don't have to thank me." Elizabeth looked into Meredith's eyes and could tell there was still something more that she was holding onto.

Meredith smiled a small smile. She wanted to talk to Derek knowing he would help her but she had made a promise. Now looking into Elizabeth's eyes she wondered if it was the right promise. Derek had proven that she could trust him and she knew that it was time for her to start letting him in. She looked back into Elizabeth's eyes, "I…I think…I think I'm ready to talk to Derek." She finished in a hushed voice.

Elizabeth wasn't disappointed that she wasn't included, she was just happy that Meredith would talk to him. "I'll go get him." She replied matching Meredith's voice.

"You don't have to." Meredith saw the confused look on Elizabeth's face. "He's at the door." Meredith raised her voice a little. "Derek."

As soon as he heard his name called, he opened the door and was by her side in a second. "Are you alright?"

Meredith smiled while Elizabeth asked, "How did you know?"

"I can feel him when he's close, it's how I knew…" Meredith stopped not wanting to finish her thought but it was too late.

"Knew what Mer?"

"Hmm."

"How you knew what Mer?"

Meredith sighed knowing this was one of those battles that shouldn't be fought. "IknewyouandMarkwereinthecourtroom."

"What?" Now Elizabeth, Derek, Mark, Kathleen, and Nancy all asked at the same time since they were now all in the room.

"I knew you and Mark were in the court room during my testimony."

Mark took a step forward so he was closer to Derek. "You knew, all this time and you never said anything."

"I…having you there helped me get through it. I hated that you had to hear the details but I knew you were both there for me and it made it a little better."

"Does Addi know?"

Meredith shook her head no. "Derek can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Of course."

Meredith looked to Mark, Kathleen, and Nancy. "Alone please."

Mark turned to Kathleen and Nancy. "Do you mind?"

Derek smiled and turned to his friend. "You too. Go tell Addi Mer is okay."

"You'll tell me anyway so I'll stay and save you some time."

"I don't tell you everything, now out."

Elizabeth got up from her spot and smiled as she grabbed Mark's arm. "Come on Mark give them some time. Let's go get some tea since someone else didn't bring it up." She finished as she shot a look to Derek.

Meredith watched Mark walk out. Elizabeth closed the door and Meredith's eyes fell back on Derek.

Derek watched Meredith change to serious and he grew concerned. "What is it Mer?"

"It's about Richard."

"Okay."

"Him and my mother had an affair. The day I came to the hospital to say goodbye to him I saw them kissing in a scrub room, that's when I ran out and overheard those nurses talking."

"Has your mom confirmed it was an affair?"

"You could say that. It had been going on for years. That's why my father left."

"I'm sorry."

"I just, I always thought of him like a father and then I find out he was the reason my father left me with a mother who never even wanted me. I use to wonder how it would have been if my parents were still together. Maybe I wouldn't be so dark and twisty. Derek what kind of man breaks up a family?"

Derek was at a loss for words. He thought highly of Richard and hearing this shook him. He looked into Meredith's eyes and saw the pain. "I honestly don't know Meredith. I do know that no matter what happened between your mother and Richard, he cares about you a great deal. Maybe you should talk to him."

"I just want to forget all this. I told you because, I want you to know that I do trust you Derek. There are still things I haven't told you and I will but only at my own pace. I'm sorry I don't share my feelings like everyone else."

Derek pulled her into a hug. "I don't want you to be like everyone else Mer. I want you just the way you are and I promise I wouldn't change anything about you," Derek paused in thought and decided to lighten the mood. "Well maybe the snoring, but nothing big."

Meredith cocked her eyebrow at him after pulling away from him. "I do not snore."

Derek chuckled. "You do. It's really cute but you do. I'm almost use to it."

Meredith lightly swatted his arm. "We should go down for dinner."

"You're right and after dinner I'll call Officer Phillips. We all will sleep better knowing the truth."

Derek helped Meredith out of bed and started for the door. "Thank-you Derek."

Derek didn't reply instead he just gave her a kiss and led her down to his family. After some time had passed they had dinner.

After Dinner everyone went into the living room for coffee. That was when Elizabeth decided to tell her family the truth aboutu how her and Michael met. Derek and Mark didn't have the same reaction as the girls and when asked they told her that Michael had told them years before and made them promise not to say anything to anyone else.

Soon after their talk, Derek received a phone call. He stepped out of the room and returned a few minutes later. As soon as he stepped into the room everyone stopped talking and watched as Derek walked up to Meredith.

"Was it him?" When Derek didn't answer right away she asked again. "Derek please was it him?"

"Yes." As soon as the word left his mouth he saw the tears forming in her eyes. He heard some gasps from around the room however he kept his focus on Meredith. "It was him. Officer Phillips has him in custody and they will take him back to Seattle first thing in the morning, he's going back to prison."

Meredith was staring at Derek while he was talking. She heard him however the words weren't registering instead she was in a trance as her emotions ran

wild and her tears were falling down her face.

"Mer, did you hear me? He's back in jail and tomorrow he will be back in prison." Derek had his hands on Meredith's upper arms and he felt her shake. "Mer, it was him, he can't hurt you again."

Meredith was broken from her trance. She looked up into Derek's eyes, "Testify, do I have to testify? Or give a statement…do I have to give a statement? And Nancy, She's going on her honeymoon…do they need a statement from her? And Kathleen, does he know who Kathleen is…does she have to…"

Derek reached up and took her face in his hands. "Sssh Mer. Officer Phillips said that they won't need anything else from you or Nancy. They still have your statements from the shooting and he ran so there was a warrant for his arrest. As soon as they get back to Seattle he will be in prison."

"Really?" Meredith asked with tears still coming down her cheeks.

"Really."

Meredith saw the look in his eyes and knew he was telling the truth. She felt the relief rush through her body. "He's in jail…he's not out there anymore." Meredith repeated as she let Derek pull her into a hug. With his arms around her she cried into his chest. After what felt like forever her tears finally stopped. Meredith pulled back and wiped her tears. She looked up into Derek's eyes once again. "I'm okay now."

Derek smiled. "You're okay."

Mark and Addison had made their way over to Derek and Meredith. Addison hugged Meredith. "Are you really okay Mer?"

"I…I think I am."

For the next few minutes the Sheppard family took turns hugging Meredith and making sure she was okay.

Derek's sisters and their families left and it was just Derek, Meredith, Mark, Addison, and Elizabeth in the living room.

"We should head back to the hotel, it's getting late."

"Yeah you're right Derek. We have a full day ahead of us tomorrow."

Mark and Addison said their goodbye's to Elizabeth and told Derek and Meredith they would wait in the car.

Derek and Meredith then said their goodbyes and followed Mark and Addison to the car.

The next day Derek, Meredith, Mark, and Addison spent the day with Elizabeth. And the following morning Elizabeth and Kathleen went to the airport with Derek, Meredith, Mark, and Addison to say goodbye. Boarding was called and Kathleen said her goodbyes. Elizabeth said goodbye to Mark and Addison before turning to Derek and also saying goodbye to him. She then turned to Meredith. "Meredith." Elizabeth said and she pulled Meredith to the side. "I'm glad my son has you and if you ever need to talk again please call me."

"Thank…thank-you Elizabeth."

"I hope by our next visit you will be calling me mom." Elizabeth smiled at the look on Meredith's face. "I have a feeling it won't be long until you are officially my daughter, just a mother's intuition."

"He has said he loves me and I believe him, I…I just wonder, what if love isn't enough? What if once he finds out about all my baggage he decides there's too much or it's too heavy?"

"I can assure you that if you love the right person and let them love you back, love is enough. As for the baggage, Derek's smart enough to get a luggage cart if he needs one."

Meredith and Elizabeth both giggled. "Thank-you Elizabeth. I hope it won't be too long before we see each other again." Meredith gave her a hug and headed to where Mark and Addison were in line to board. She turned and saw Elizabeth giving Derek another hug.

"Mom I really need to go. Thank-you for being so welcoming to Mer, I love you and I promise I will call."

Elizabeth pulled away and cupped his face in her hands as she stared into his eyes. "Remember the luggage cart Derek. When it's time remember the cart."

"Mom?"

"Don't worry honey you'll figure it out soon enough. You better treat her right, she deserves so much."

"Don't worry mom, I haven't forgotten all the conversations dad had with Mark and I. Besides with her friends and now the family looking out for her, I know that if I hurt her I would have to run to somewhere far, far away to keep safe."

"Derek honey, if you hurt her, there wouldn't be anywhere you could run to that would keep you safe."

"I love you mom."

"I love you too now go, have a safe flight and call me when you get home so I know you all made it safely."

Derek gave her one final hug before joining Meredith, Mark, and Addison who were just entering the door to board the plane. "Seattle here we come."

"Work here we come." Mark whined.

"Home here we come." Addison sighed.

Meredith however didn't reply she just smiled as they entered the plane and found their seats. _'A new life, a life with no Luke, a life where I learn to love, a life with Derek by my side, and a life where I learn to share my baggage…here I come.' _Meredith thought as she settled into Derek's arms with her head on his shoulder and she closed her eyes knowing when she woke she would be back in Seattle ready to start that new life.

_So that was chapter 14. I hope you liked it. I have started chapter 15 but I don't want to say when it will be done incase it takes longer. I can tell you it is going to jump ahead in time. I hope you are still enjoying my story and that you will review and let me know what you think if you have time. **Thank-you for reading!** _


	15. Chapter 15

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy or it's characters._

Chapter 15

It had been three months since Nancy's wedding. Meredith was determined to have the new life she thought about while loading the plane however there was still something holding her back. Derek was staying at the house almost every night which was bittersweet. Meredith loved having him there however she was running out of reasons for her coming home late or having to leave early in the morning. She knew Derek knew she was making excuses however he never pushed.

The last week has been the worst. Meredith was working more hours which meant she didn't have much time away from the hospital and the time away was filled. Meredith's alarm went off as she rolled over to shut it off. She sighed as she heard the knock on her door.

"Mer?"

"It's okay Iz, you can come in."

"Good morning!" Izzie exclaimed with a smile on her face as she stepped in the bedroom. "Where's Derek?"

"He got paged about 3 hours ago."

"Oh, well you better hurry up so we aren't late."

"Go ahead Iz, I'm just going to stay home today."

Izzie almost ran up to the bed and put her hand on Meredith's forehead. "Are you sick, you don't have a fever."

"I…I'm just not going in today."

"Why?"

"Iz."

"Tell me or I'll call Christina."

"I just need a mental health day."

"You're an intern, you don't get those. Mer what's going on, I know you've been gone a lot. Are you and Derek okay?"

"What, no! Derek and I are fine I just want a day off, I need a day off Iz."

"You and I both know that Bailey will hurt you and she will hurt George and I if we leave you here not to mention Christina." Izzie sighed and sat on the bed. "Mer if you tell me what this is about I can help you."

Meredith looked up at Izzie without saying anything.

"You know you are a bad liar. Tell me what's really going on if it doesn't have to do with Mcdreamy."

"I have a feeling."

"A feeling, what kind of feeling?"

"I just feel like I should stay in bed today."

"Okay, um channeling Christina…A Feeling, you have a feeling. Snap out of it. You can't stay home. You are a surgeon it's cut throat, you don't stay in bed all day, you cut now get up and get ready so we are not late." Izzie smiled slightly. "How was that?"

Meredith smiled back. "You're getting there Iz but you still have a ways to go I think."

"If you tell Christina…"

"Don't worry your secret is safe with me."

"What secret?" George asked coming into the room with a coffee mug for Meredith.

Meredith shrugged as she got out of the bed. "Izzie was trying to channel Christina."

"Meredith!" Izzie exclaimed.

George laughed. "Is she any better?"

"She still has a ways to go but her face was more stern this time."

"I hate you guys." Izzie said getting up and heading to the door.

"You love us and thanks Iz."

Izzie turned back to Meredith and George. "Anytime Mer now get going." Izzie yelled from the hallway.

Meredith giggled as she followed George out of her room.

After lunch Meredith and her friends were standing at the nurses' station waiting for new cases. Derek approached Meredith.

"Hey Mer how has your day been?"

Meredith turned around to look at him and gave him a smile. "Boring. I was stuck on scut this morning so if you have a surgery you need an intern for I'd be happy to help you."

Derek smiled, "Why were you on scut?"

"I…well…."

"She was late." Izzie blurted out.

Derek raised his eyebrow. "Why?"

"I…I…"

"She had a feeling."

Meredith shot a look to her friend. "Izzie!"

"Don't look at me like that. It's your fault we were late which is why you were on scut and George and I have been stuck in the pit. That's not going to change if you avoid telling Mcdreamy the truth."

"I hate you." Meredith said through gritted teeth. She knew Izzie was right however she did not want to talk about it right then at that moment.

Izzie smiled. "Oh you love me."

Derek was going to interject when he saw the look on Meredith's face however she beat him to it.

"Addi, Mark how was your appointment?" Meredith asked as she saw the two walking up to the group from over Izzie's shoulder.

Mark was about to respond when they heard two pagers go off. Everyone looked down however it was George and Izzie who took off towards the pit.

"So how is my goddaughter doing?"

"She's good Derek." Mark said with a sigh as he continued. "It's her mother that is having the trouble."

"What's wrong with Mcwife?"

"Shut up Evil Spawn."

"You shut up Crack Whore."

"Both of you shut up." Meredith said looking between the two before turning back to Addison and Mark. "What is wrong?"

"Her blood pressure is high."

"It's nothing to worry about Mark."

"Smith said you needed to slow down."

"I have slowed down Mark and I told you if I have to I will stop working when it gets closer to my due date."

Mark rolled his eyes. "Which means the day you give birth."

"Don't be like that Mark. I will not put Lilly or myself in danger and besides I do know a thing or two about babies and pregnant women."

Mark pulled her in for a hug, "I know you do Addi but you have never been pregnant before and I'm worried about you." He finished with a kiss.

Meredith and Derek smiled at each other while Alex and Christina rolled their eyes.

"Alright enough with the mushy before I vomit. Sloan I'm with you for the rest of today."

"Crack Whore is right for a change. Mcwife I'm with you."

Derek still has his eyes on Meredith as his smile grows. "I guess that means you're with me."

"Actually…" Meredith started to speak only to be cut off by both Alex and Cristina.

"She's with you."

Meredith turned to face them. "What?"

Alex held up his hand. "I got this." He then turned back to Meredith and Derek. "Enough of the mushiness. We want to cut." He then turned back to Christina. "Good?"

Christiana raised her eyebrows. "Not bad."

Derek, Meredith, Addison, and Mark all chuckled. Mark was about to speak when they heard yelling coming from down the hallway. All eyes turned to see Dr. Bailey, Izzie, and George exit the elevator with a gurney and a nurse pushing the gurney.

"Let me go I have a surgery scheduled in twenty minutes…I have to scrub in and make sure the OR is ready…" The person on the gurney was yelling. She looked up and saw the group of doctors. "What are you doing here…I have told you, you can't skip school and still expect to do anything with your life…You have always been stupid, you need to get to school…Is the OR ready?"

As soon as Meredith heard the yelling she cringed. She turned and saw her mother being wheeled out of the elevator as soon as Ellis saw Meredith, Meredith stepped behind Mark and Derek trying to shield herself. After she saw Ellis was in one of the rooms she quickly backed away and snuck into an empty on call room.

Dr. Bailey ushered them into a room and got Ellis calmed down. She came back out into the hall. "Did any of you know about Grey's mother?"

Everyone shook their heads no.

"Where's Grey?" Dr. Bailey asked looking at each of the doctors standing in front of her.

They all looked around. Christina and Addison noticed the close by on call room and both started for it with the others following.

Derek stayed with Dr. Bailey and got an update on Ellis.

Christina, Izzie, Alex, George, Mark, and Addison made their way to the on call room and entered. They came to stand in front of Meredith who was sitting on the edge of one of the beds staring straight ahead at the wall. "Mer?"

"I'm fine."

"Meredith?"

Meredith didn't respond to Izzie so George tried. "Mer…Meredith."

"I'm fine."

"You can't use that word with us." Addison snapped. She hated when Meredith got like this.

"I…AM…FINE!" Meredith yelled as she got up and turned to leave.

Mark grabbed her arm and turned her to face them all again. "You Meredith Grey are not fine. Why didn't you tell any of us?"

Derek opened the door and saw Meredith's back. He heard Mark's question and watched as Meredith started to back away from Mark and their other friends. "She made me promise not to tell anyone. I'm going to say this one more time…I am fine so leave me alone. I don't want to talk about it and I don't want to know what is happening."

Izzie took a step forward. "Mer…Diverticulitis."

"I don't want to know Iz, just let me know what I have to sign."

Christina stepped forward. "Your mother has Alzheimer's and you couldn't tell us and now she has Diverticulitis. You are nowhere near fine Meredith."

"Christina." Meredith said in a low voice as her eyes went to the floor. It only took two more steps before she backed right into something hard. She went to turn around however arms embraced her and she wasn't able to move. She felt his warm breath on her as he spoke.

"You are not taking any more steps backward Mer. We agreed only forward from now on. I am not going to let you go backward anymore." Tears came to Meredith's eyes and they started to roll down her cheeks as Derek continued. "You're not alone anymore, I'm not going to leave you alone. You have us all here for you and it's okay to lean on us if you need to. How long have you known?"

Meredith didn't look up from the floor as the tears continued and Derek's hold stayed tight. "Since after college graduation. It was the only time she came to see me. She told me about the Alzheimer's and said she didn't want anyone but me to know about it. She had taken care of everything with the nursing home and she told me that I had to move to Seattle because I was all she had."

"That's why you didn't go to New York?"

Meredith nodded to his question. "I didn't want to stay away from you or my friends but I thought that going to New York would give me a new start and I was looking forward to a new start away from her."

"But it wasn't just her that you were wanting to get away from was it Mer?" Derek saw her nod her head in agreement and he continued. "Who else did you want to get away from Meredith?"

"I just wanted the nightmare to stop. I wanted to be normal again."

"Who else Mer?"

There was silence for a few minutes before her answer came. "Luke." Meredith's voice cracked. "She supported him. She cared more about him than she did me and I am her daughter. I thought that if I left them both in my past I could be normal. That was too much to ask though because she showed up. I know she doesn't love me but she is right, I'm all she has left and I couldn't abandon her not like she has done to me all my life." Meredith finished before she let herself cry as Derek held her.

Derek looked towards their friends and saw the shocked looks on their faces. He gave them a small smile as he turned Meredith around so he could properly hug her.

When Meredith turned she threw her arms around Derek's neck. "I'm so sorry I didn't tell you Derek…I wanted to so many times and I almost did when we were in New York but I couldn't betray her wishes…I'm so sorry…don't be mad at me…I love you. I love you so much it hurts. Please don't be mad…"

Derek had heard her rambling however everything stopped once he heard the three words he had been waiting years to hear.

Meredith noticed his change and pulled back. "What…what is it?"

"Say it again."

Meredith studied him for a few seconds. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you…"

"Not that."

"What?"

"You love me." Derek said as he smiled.

"Of course I do wait, I just said all that and all you heard was I love you?"

"You've never said it before."

"I…"

"I knew you cared Mer but you never said it and now…say it again."

"I love you Derek."

"I love you too Meredith." Derek's smile grew before pulling her in for a kiss.

"Mcvomit." Christina coughed.

Meredith turned back to face her friends after forgetting they were in the room. "I'm sorry I didn't tell anyone, I just…I couldn't."

Alex stepped forward and gave Meredith a hug. "I'm glad it didn't take you as long as it usually does. I guess Mcdreamy is good for you."

"Thanks Alex. I love you too."

Alex left the room after giving Derek a quick nod.

Christina came up to Meredith next and gave her an awkward hug. "Just so you know I hate you right now for making me hug you, you know I don't do hugging."

Meredith giggled as Christina pulled away. Christina went to leave when she turned back to Derek and lowered her voice a little. "Good job Mcdreamy." And then she was gone.

George stepped up to Meredith next and also gave her a hug. "We'll let you know about your mom." When he pulled back he saw Meredith nod and then gave a quick glance in Derek's direction before following Alex and Christina out of the room.

"We understand Mer. Don't worry just remember what Derek said about leaning on us if you need us." Izzie said as she stepped forward and gave Meredith a hug. Izzie smiled at Derek over Meredith's shoulder before leaving the room.

Meredith looked back to Mark and Addison who were still in the room.

Addison went to step forward when she gasped and her hand flew to her stomach. Mark was at her side immediately as Meredith and Derek stepped closer looking to her in concern. "Addi are you okay?" Mark asked.

Addison took Marks hand and placed it on her stomach as she smiled. "I'm great Mark. Lilly…she just moved."

There was silence before Mark also broke out into a smile. "Wow!"

Addison looked up. "I think Lilly is happy with her godmother is." Addison removed her hand and Mark dropped his as Addison then took Meredith's hand and placed it on her stomach to feel Lilly.

Meredith's eyes got big as she felt the movement. "That's amazing."

Addison gave Meredith a hug. "It is and so are you Mer."

"Let's go Mcsteamy and Mcwife, we want to cut and we are not getting any younger." Christina called from the hallway.

Addison left the room as Mark pulled Meredith into a hug. He didn't really know what to say so her but he said the first thing that came into his mind when Derek had mentioned her going to New York. "I'm glad you're here and not in New York."

Mark pulled back and smiled at her as he walked around her. He stopped, turned back to Derek, and whispered. "That is why they call you Mcdreamy."

Derek smiled, "Why do they call you Mcsteamy then?"

"Only Addison will ever know that but Lilly is proof of my abilities." Mark said confidently as he left the room.

Derek smiled and turned back to Meredith. "Are you okay?"

"I…actually I am. Thanks to you."

"That's what I'm here for and we'll pick up the ice cream on the way home."

"You really are my Mcdreamy." Meredith gave Derek another hug as both their pagers went off and they ran out of the room.

It had been two weeks since Ellis was admitted to the hospital. She was now back in the nursing home. Meredith still tried to visit as much as possible and now that Derek knew he went with anytime he could.

Meredith was with Addison at lunch. "Addi?"

Addison looked up at Meredith. "Yes." Addison noticed Meredith's nervous expression and she set her sandwich down to give Meredith her full attention. "What is it Mer?"

"I want to try with Derek again."

"Try…try what?" Addison asked however after she looked closer at Meredith and realized what she was talking about. "Okay." Addison wasn't sure where Meredith was going so she kept quiet waiting for Meredith to continue.

She didn't have to wait long as Meredith started talking. "I think…no I know I'm ready. Derek he's been so patient with me and I know he will never hurt me." Meredith paused and turned her eyes so she was looking directly into Addison's. "He's it for me Addi. It's taken me this long to figure it out but I know it now. He makes me feel safe and I know he loves me. I haven't made it easy for him."

"Derek was never one to do things the easy way."

"He has taught me what real love is. You and Mark have shown me that you can be in love, be happy, and make it last. Derek has taught me what that kind of love feels like and I don't want to lose that."

"Derek isn't going to let you go Mer." Addison paused and then continued. "From the first day he saw you in this hospital he has talked about being with you, he has worried about you, and he has loved you. He isn't going to let you go no matter what and Mer he will help you with this. You all call him Mcdreamy for a reason after all."

Meredith smiled. "Thank-you Addi. I was going to talk to Christina and Izzie but…"

"I'm glad you came to me." Addison reached over and squeezed Meredith's hand before continuing. "So do you guys have plans tonight or do you want to come over for dinner?"

"Actually Derek said he has a surprise for me." Meredith rolled her eyes and continued. "He knows I hate surprises but yet he can't help himself."

Addison chuckled knowing exactly what the surprise was. "Well he hasn't done anything you haven't liked so far has he?"

"Addison Montgomery-Sloan…you know what he is up to don't you?"

Addison quickly looked around and then down to her pager. "Oh a patient, I have to go. I'll see you later Mer, have fun tonight." Addison yelled as she rushed away from the table.

The sun was starting to set as Meredith met Derek in the lobby. "Where are we going?"

"You know I won't tell you so just enjoy the ride. How was your day?"

Meredith decided to take his advice and enjoy the night. "It was good. Addison and I had an interesting conversation at lunch today."

"Did you? What did you talk about?"

"Not much just girl talk. How was your day?"

"Good except for not getting to see much of you."

"You're so sweet."

"Mark invited us for dinner tomorrow, I accepted."

"That's good I didn't have any other plan's and I certainly can't cook so it's good if someone else does it."

Derek chuckled as he turned down a gravel road. Meredith took notice and started looking out the window's instead of at Derek. He drove further down and brought the car to a stop. Before Meredith could say anything he quickly got out and ran around to open Meredith's door.

As Meredith took Derek's hand and stepped out of the car. "Derek where are we?"

Derek didn't answer. He led her away from the car towards a piece of land that had been disturbed. Once they got there he pulled Meredith in front of him and he pulled her into his chest.

"Derek where are we?" Meredith asked again as she felt his arms around her.

"Our future Meredith." Derek didn't hear anything from Meredith so he continued. "This is going to be our home Mer. I bought the land two months ago and we broke ground three days ago. The house is going to be exactly like you want it and I have the plans to get your final approval before we start building. I know this is a little overwhelming right now but it's time. I want us to be together without Izzie, George, and Alex. They are our friends and don't get me wrong I don't mind them being around but I want you to myself. I want to come home to you and wake up next to you in a place that is just you and me. That's what this house is going to be." Derek paused a little nervous that he didn't hear anything from Meredith so he slowly turned her around and saw the tears coming from her eyes. "Do you not like it?"

"Can I…can I see the plans?"

Derek nodded, "I'll be right back." Derek ran back to the car and grabbed the blueprints before running back to Meredith. "Here you go." He kneeled down to the ground and unrolled them so she could see.

Meredith kneeled down beside him and helped him hold the blueprints as she looked them over.

Derek was anxious for her reaction but she didn't say anything. Finally he couldn't take it anymore. "We can change anything you want."

Meredith looked up to meet Derek's eyes. "It's…it's perfect Derek. How…how did you know?"

"We've talked about this before."

"We've talked in general. We have never talked about details." Meredith pointed to the blueprints. "This is details and it's everything I would want."

Derek rolled up the blueprints and stood helping Meredith up as well. "I have seen the way you look at houses when we drive by one you like and I have seen you when you look through magazines. You think I'm not looking but I am. Mer I don't just listen to what you say I also listen to what you don't say."

Meredith smiled at him and threw her arms around his neck as she gave him a kiss. When she pulled back she looked him directly in the eyes, "I love you Derek and Thank-you."

"You're welcome, and I love you too."

Meredith shivered in the cool air and Derek noticed. "I think it's time to get going. Your place or mine?"

They started walking back to the car. "Your place. Izzie and Alex are home tonight and I want to be alone with you."

They both got in and drove to Derek's apartment. When they got there Derek made dinner for them. They spent a little time watching TV before they decided to go to bed. They each got ready and both climbed into bed.

Just like every night they both cuddled up next to each other. Derek turned to give Meredith a kiss goodnight however she deepened the kiss.

When they broke for air Derek spoke as he looked deeply into Meredith's eyes. "Mer are you…"

Meredith gave a slight nod. "I..I love you Derek and I want to show you."

"Are you sure you're ready?"

Meredith pulled him back in for another kiss. Derek took that as his answer.

Derek continued to kiss her and slowly they helped each other out of some of their clothing while getting to know the feel of each other's bodies without the clothing. Derek was slow and kept checking her eyes to make sure she was still okay and each time all he saw was the love she had for him. He reached down to slide her pajama pants off and he started to please her.

"Derek you don't have to."

"Ssh Mer, tonight is all about you."

"But…"

"Just trust me Mer."

"I do, I do trust you Derek."

Derek pleased her and waited for her to come down from the high.

"That was…"

"Are you okay?"

Meredith had a smile on her face as she pulled him up to her so she could kiss him. "I am more than okay Derek."

Derek gave her a kiss before he removed his boxers and positioned himself above her. When he was directly above her he noticed a panicked look on her face. "Mer?"

"I'm okay Derek…I'm just…I want this please…"

Derek saw the want in her eyes but still saw the slight panic. He continued to look into her eyes. "Okay Mer just keep looking at me and remember it's me Derek okay."

"Derek…okay…I love you Derek."

"I love you too Meredith." Derek responded as he slowly entered her. He stopped to let her get the feel of him. "I love you Mer."

"I love you too Derek, I'm okay. I love you too."

"Tell me if you need me to stop." Derek watched as she nodded slightly and he started moving. As he did he watched the panic wash from Meredith's face. Soon he heard the moans coming from her and he knew exactly when she hit her peak. He followed quickly after and gave her another kiss before falling beside her.

They both stayed in silence as they each came down from their highs.

"Mer are you okay?"

Meredith turned to him and a tear rolled down her cheek.

"Mer?"

Meredith's breathing still wasn't completely normal as she spoke. "I just…I never knew, this is what it feels like to be happy. You have made me so happy."

"The feeling is mutual honey." Derek replied as he gave her another kiss.

Derek pulled her close and held her. He felt her breathing change and heard her snores as she fell asleep. Derek gave her a kiss on the top of her head before he fell asleep.

The next morning Derek woke up first and quickly went and made breakfast. Once he was finished he brought it to her. "Mer…Mer it's time to get up."

"We are both off today Der, let's sleep." Meredith replied without opening her eyes.

"We have plans and I made breakfast." Derek said as he gently brushed her hair from her face. He reached down and gave her a kiss. When he felt her deepen the kiss he pulled back. "Good morning."

Meredith reluctantly opened her eyes and saw his smiling face. She couldn't deny the smile that pulled at her lips as she saw him "Good morning."

Derek put the tray of breakfast in front of her. "Breakfast in bed."

Meredith sat up as Derek put the tray in front of her and they both started eating. "This is delicious."

"Of course it is, I made it." Derek saw Meredith roll her eyes as they fell into silence. After a few minutes of watching her Derek asked. "Are you okay about last night?"

Meredith looked at him with a smile. "Last night was perfect." Then her smile faded. "I just…wish you could have been my first."

"I am your first Meredith." Derek said firmly.

"Luke."

"You didn't give yourself to him Mer, he wasn't your first. Last night, you gave yourself, all of yourself to me. I am the first and only man you have loved enough to give yourself to."

Meredith smiled an evil smile. "I love Alex, George, and Mark too."

"Meredith Grey if you so much as look at either of them the way you looked at me last night or moan their names like you moaned mine I promise you I will not be your Mcdreamy any longer."

Meredith giggled. "You don't have to worry about that Derek. They are my brothers and I have never once thought about doing what we did last night with any of them. I can't wait to hear what they have to say about you calling yourself Mcdreamy."

Derek removed the tray as he crawled up to her. "It's no secret. Everyone calls me Mcdreamy, I can't help it and besides haven't you heard Mark calling himself Mcsteamy? It's not an insult you know."

Meredith giggled again as Derek kissed her. Once again they found themselves in each other's arms before they decided to get out of bed and actually start their day.

_Chapter 15...I hope you liked it. Just so you know Addison is now about 5 months pregnant for those of you that like to know timeframes. Please let me know what you think and review because honestly I am a little nervous about this chapter. I didn't want to get to detailed at the end but I wanted you to know where Meredith and Derek are in their relationship now. **Thank-you for reading and I really do hope you are still enjoying!**_


	16. Chapter 16

Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy or it's characters.

Chapter 16

"Good morning Addi. Aren't you suppose to be on bed rest?"

"Doctor's appointment, are you late?" Addison asked Meredith as they both entered the elevator.

"No shift starts at 9. One more week right?"

"Yeah, did Derek tell you mom is coming today?"

"He did and he said him and Mark are going to pick her up from the airport in-between surgeries. I guess we are coming over tonight for dinner right?"

Addison went to answer however before she could answer the elevator jerked to a stop and the lights flashed. "You have got to be kidding me."

Meredith grabbed the phone to call someone and let them know they were stuck. "It's not working. Check your cell and see if you can get a signal." Meredith said as she pulled her cell phone out and started checking for a signal.

"Do you have anything?"

"No." Meredith replied.

Addison leaned against the wall. "Well it shouldn't be too long before someone notices that the elevator isn't working. I guess we are just going to have to be patient." As she finished there was a splash.

"Addison Sloan was this a scheduled appointment?"

Addison grabbed her stomach as a contraction hit. Meredith was at her side immediately. Once the contraction let up Meredith helped her to the other side of the elevator and helped her sit down. Addison looked into Meredith's eyes and smiled slightly. "I started having pains after Mark left this morning. I thought I would have enough time to get here."

"Did you call Mark?"

Addison shook her head no. "I didn't want him to worry."

"Well that was smart wasn't it? It's not like you being in labor stuck in an elevator with an intern who knows nothing about babies isn't going to worry him…right…that's better than having him come get you or here's a thought call an ambulance so they can bring you instead of driving." Meredith stated as her voice increased in level until she was yelling by the end.

"I'm sorry." Addison said as she started to cry. "I didn't want to be alone."

Meredith grabbed Addison's hand and squeezed. "No, I'm sorry I shouldn't have yelled. It will be okay. They will get us out of here soon."

For the next fifteen minutes Addison suffered through contractions with Meredith by her side.

Finally the doors were pried open and Meredith stood meeting the chiefs concerned eyes. "Meredith are you alright?"

"No, I am not alright. I am stuck in an elevator and Addi is in here, her water broke and her contractions are coming faster."

"Dr. Sloan is in there with you?"

Meredith didn't need to answer because Addison let out a scream as another contraction hit. Meredith looked back to the chief.

"Right, I'll find out what the holdup is."

"Call Mark and Derek so they know where we are please."

Dr. Webber nodded as he stood up and walked away.

"It's okay Addi. Dr. Webber is going to get us out of here. Just hold on."

After a few more contractions Addison spoke. "Mer you have to see how dilated I am."

"Dr. Webber said he would get us out of here we just need to wait a little longer."

Another contraction hit and when it finished Addison looked up to Meredith. "Mer my contractions are too close together. I don't think we are going to get out of here in time."

"Addi, Addi are you in there?"

"Mark!"

Meredith stood and made her way to the open door. "Mark is Derek there?"

"What's going on Mer? Is Addi okay, the baby, how is Lilly?"

"Calm down Mark. The baby is coming and you have to get Addi out of here. Mark she can't have the baby here. Please find out what is taking so long."

Mark saw the panic on Meredith's face and nodded his understanding. He went to stand when Meredith stopped him. "Derek?"

"He's on his way." Mark replied before standing and walking away.

Meredith went back to Addison and held her hand through some more contractions.

"Mer I know you don't want to do this but you are going to have to. I need you to see how dilated I am."

"Addi Dr. Webber and Mark are going to get you out of here you just need to wait a little longer."

"Mer?"

Meredith immediately stood and saw Derek looking in the open doors. "Derek, you have to get us out of here…Addi is in labor and I don't know how much longer before Lilly is born…her contractions are so close….Dr. Webber was here and he said he was going to see what was taking so long but he hasn't been back and Mark was here but I don't know where he went and Addi…"

"Mer, Meredith, you have to calm down. I saw Dr. Webber and Mark talking to the technicians."

"Good, that's good." Meredith turned her eyes to Addison. "See Addi I told you we would get out of here in time." Addison had another contraction and Meredith went to her. Once it was done she stood back up to see Derek. "Derek."

"It's okay Mer, I'll go see what the holdup is." Derek stood and made his way to the chief and Mark.

Meredith went back to Addison. "It's okay Mer I've delivered hundreds of babies and so far everything seems to be progressing normally. I know you don't want to do this but I need you to check and tell me how far I am. Everything is going to be okay, I will coach you every step of the way."

Meredith nodded and did as Addison had instructed. "9 centimeters."

"Meredith."

"Addi what if something goes wrong? I know my history something always goes wrong. I knew I should have stayed in bed. I had a feeling but stupid me had to get up and come to work. Lilly can't come yet, not until they get you out of here."

"What are you talking about?"

"Something is going to happen today, something bad."

"Meredith, nothing is going to happen to Lilly, myself, or you. As long as you follow my instructions everything will be okay and we will get out of here."

"Addi, they aren't going to get us out in time are they?" Meredith asked after another contraction.

"I think Lilly is excited to meet her godmother. She's coming fast but everything really seems to be progressing like normal. Maybe this is the one time your feeling is wrong."

"I hope you're right Addi. You know Mark is going to be mad that he's not here with you?"

Addison chuckled. "I think he'll be okay once you tell him how much your hand is hurting."

Meredith took a deep breath before talking again. "Alright I'm going to help you move down the wall a little so that Mark can see you."

"What?"

"Well if I am going to do this the least we can do is make sure that Mark can get a clear picture of you. Don't worry he won't be able to see all of you. If I know Derek and Dr. Webber they will be close by and we don't want them seeing things they shouldn't be seeing do we?"

Addison grabbed Meredith's arm as she went to help her move. "I'm glad you didn't stay in bed today."

"Me too." Meredith helped position Addison so that she could be seen from the door. After another contraction she spoke again. "Okay now we have to wait for them to figure out that they aren't going to get this thing fixed in time so they can get us the supplies we need."

"How much longer Richard?" Derek asked as he walked up to Mark and Richard.

"As I was just telling Dr. Sloan it's going to take awhile."

"What?"

"Calm down Sheppard."

"Mer is in there with Addi who is about to give birth to my goddaughter. Don't tell me to calm down Richard. Mer is already starting to panic if she knows she has to deliver Lilly…she is not going to be happy."

"What if something goes wrong Richard, what if there is something wrong with Lilly or my wife?"

"Calm down Mark. I have supplies coming. We can give them to Meredith and Addison will be able to tell Meredith what she needs to do." Richard paused and looked between the two doctors. "Now both of you need to calm down before we go back over there and tell them what is going on. If either of them hear you upset it will only make it worse for the two of them and we don't need them panicking. We all know Meredith will be already." As Richard finished talking a nurse came with the supplies he had asked for. "Now we can pry the doors open a little further so we can get these in. Mark you need to be there for Addison and Derek, Meredith is going to need to know you are there for her. Let's go."

The three men got to the partially open elevator door and Derek was volunteered to be the one to tell the two women in the elevator that it would be longer than they had hoped before they would be able to get out. Derek sighed and kneeled down. "Mer?"

Meredith had just helped Addison through another contraction when she heard Derek call her. She looked over to see him staring at her. When she saw the look in his eyes she knew she was right which meant she would be helping Addison deliver Lilly. "Do you have the supplies?"

"What?"

"Addison said Lilly should be here within the next hour and I'm pretty sure that you're here to tell me the elevator is not going to be fixed within that time frame. Am I right?"

Derek nodded. He then turned back to the others and motioned for the supplies. As he started handing them to Meredith he spoke again. "You'll do great Mer. I'm a little jealous that you get to hold our god daughter before me though."

"Think about Mark." Meredith said with a small smile. "You'll be here right, or do you have surgery?"

"I'll be right here."

"Derek?" Addison said from her spot.

"How are you Addi?"

"Right about now I'm swearing off men. Where's Mark?"

"He's here, I'll get him." Derek turned back to Meredith. "You can do this Mer. I love you and I'm right here if you need me."

"Thanks Derek. You better get Mark." Meredith said as she knelt back down by Addison to help her through another contraction.

Mark quickly took the spot Derek had left. "Addi, I'm so sorry I'm not in there. I'm here, you're doing really good baby."

After about another hour of Addison yelling, Lillian Rose Sloan was born. Once she was placed in Addison's arms tears came to her eyes while she stared at her daughter.

"She is beautiful Addi."

"Thank-you Mer, I'm glad you were here with me."

"So am I."

Addison turned to look at Meredith and she smiled. "I guess this was the one time your feeling was wrong."

Meredith saw the joy on Addison's face and she didn't want to take that away. She turned to see Mark who had tears in his eyes still looking in and she turned back to Addison. "I guess you're right." Meredith then stood and went to the door. "She's beautiful Mark wait till you see her."

"Thank-you Mer."

"What are friends for? So when are we going to get out of here?"

Addison was now in a room holding Lilly in her arms. Mark was beside her and Derek and Meredith were also in the room.

"Can I hold her now?"

"No."

"Oh come on Addi. You let Mark and Mer hold her. I want to hold my goddaughter."

"Okay, 1. Mark is her father and 2. Mer helped deliver her. And 3. If you keep whining we will pick a new Godfather."

Mark and Meredith both chuckled.

Meredith took a step and took Lilly from Addison's arms. "She is perfect Addi." After a minute of holding her, Meredith's pager went off. "Oh crap I have to go. Der?" Meredith then handed Lilly to Derek who had a huge smile on his face. "I'll be back when I get a chance."

Meredith went down to the pit. "What do we have?"

"I paged Neuro. There was an accident. Victim one has head trauma." The nurse said leading her behind a curtain.

"I'm with Sheppard today, order a CT."

"We can't Dr. Grey."

"What do you mean you can't?"

"We are waiting for another police officer."

Meredith went to speak however someone else spoke first. "Meredith."

Meredith looked up and started to shake slightly. She met the eyes of the man she thought she wouldn't ever have to see again. "What are you doing here?"

"I was being transferred when our vehicle was hit. I'm fine but…"

"I…um…maybe…"

"Don't be stupid Meredith. As much as I would like to finish what I started I can't since I am still connected to this idiot."

"Luke."

"Dr. Grey are you alright?" The nurse asked seeing Meredith visibly shaken.

"Fine. Page Sheppard." Meredith said and then the nurse left.

Meredith approached the bed and examined the patient. "We need to get him to CT."

Luke lifted his hand and the cuff fell off. He looked up and smiled to Meredith. "I just wanted to come here."

"What?" Meredith asked taking a step back.

Luke stood quickly and roughly pushed Meredith up against a wall. "You ruined my life and you need to pay for that. This accident is going to help me make sure you pay." Luke's hand was around Meredith's neck.

"Luke don't do this." Meredith pleaded.

"I guess you're not so great now are you Meredith? You got everything I wanted while I am stuck in prison for something I didn't do."

"Something you didn't do, you raped me, you made it so I didn't trust other guys, my mother took your side. And if that wasn't enough you shot me, you tried to kill me and through all these years you are the one who haunts my dreams. Why, why did you do it?"

"I loved you but you…It seems you have changed through the years. That is the most I have heard you say at one time. It's too bad that now you won't be able to say anything again." Luke said as he started to squeeze his hands.

Meredith grabbed at his hands. "You didn't love me Luke what you and I had it wasn't love, Derek has shown me that. Derek loves me and I love him. I'm done, I'm done letting you have any part of my life. I don't know why you raped me or why you shot me but I am happy now with Derek and my friends so you don't get to be part of my life anymore. You can't hurt me anymore. I'm not letting you have any control over me anymore. I know what real love is thanks to Derek and my real friends and you are not going to hurt me anymore. I…I'm forgiving you, I'm letting you go."

"I don't need your forgiveness, I didn't do anything to you that you didn't ask for. You ruined my life and now I am going to take yours." When Luke finished he squeezed harder.

"Luke you can't do this." She kept repeating hoping that someone would save her.

"Mer is right she is beautiful and she looks just like you Addi."

"Thanks Derek."

"I'm going to go talk to the Chief after my shift Addi."

"How long are you going to take off?" Derek asked still looking at Lilly who was sleeping in his arms.

"Hopefully two weeks to make sure Lilly and Addi are okay."

"We will be fine Mark."

"I know you will be but you get 3 whole months with her by yourself and I want some time with her."

Beeping filled the room as both Derek and Mark's pagers went off. Derek handed Lilly to Addison and both him and Mark looked down. Mark looked back up to Addison. "It's the pit."

"Go, we are fine."

Mark gave Addison and Lilly a quick kiss and then followed Derek out of the room and they both headed to the pit.

"Dr. Sheppard, curtain 1 car accident. Dr. Sloan curtain 2 fist fight."

Mark looked to Derek "Isn't this what interns are for?"

"Where's Dr. Grey, she is my intern for the day?"

"She was here but I haven't seen her since, I think the patient shook her up."

Derek and Mark both started walking to their curtains however when they got closer to curtain 1 they heard some commotion. Derek pulled the curtain back and looked in. He paused for a moment not believing his eyes however once he focused on Meredith's face he went into action. "Get off of her you bastard!" Derek yelled as he ran up and pulled the man away from Meredith.

Mark had heard Derek gasp and he turned to see Derek practically leap into the room. When he heard Derek yell Mark was there within seconds. Mark didn't see Meredith on the ground gasping for air instead he saw Derek about to punch someone. He grabbed Derek to prevent the punch. "Derek calm down."

Derek yelled while Mark was holding him. "Someone get security now. You're through hurting her do you hear me?"

"Derek what the hell is going on?" Mark asked confused.

Security guards came in and picked Luke up off the ground and held him.

Derek still watched Luke as he spoke. "What the hell are you doing here, where are the police?" Derek looked to the security guards. "Don't you dare let him out of your sight."

"Derek, what is going on?"

"Luke he was choking…he had Mer…" Derek stopped struggling in Mark's hold and turned his head. "Mer, Meredith." He shrugged Mark off him and went to Meredith who was on the floor still gasping for air and coughing slightly trying to get air back into her lungs.

Mark saw Meredith struggling to breathe and became alarmed. "Get me a gurney and oxygen in here now." He then turned back to the security guards and the nurse who had appeared. "Get him out of here and get the police. And you get this man to CT, page Sheppard when you get the scans."

As the room cleared out a gurney was brought in and Mark kneeled down next to Derek who was holding Meredith. "Derek."

Derek lifted her up and tried to put her on the gurney however she wouldn't let go. "Mer we need to make sure you are okay. I promise I'm not going anywhere, I'll stay right here."

Meredith looked him in the eyes before she reluctantly let him go. Derek placed her down and Mark put the oxygen on. Meredith went to pull it off, "I…don't…need…this." Her voice was raspy.

Derek stopped her movements. "Mer please leave it on for now and I don't want you talking, just…just rest."

Meredith laid down still holding Derek's hand as they moved her into a room. Both Derek and Mark looked her over to make sure she was okay. They found a bruise on her back from where she hit the wall and the bruise around her neck.

Once they were done Meredith finally let her eyes close. Derek and Mark stepped away from the bed. "I need to stay with her."

"I know you want to Derek but you have patients. I'll page Izzie and have her help move her up to Addi's room in case she wakes up."

Derek nodded. "Okay, let's go tell Addi before she hears about this from a nurse."

Mark nods his agreement as him and Derek both leave Izzie with Meredith and head to Addison's room.

Derek and Mark walked into Addison's room. Mark gave Addison a kiss and took Lilly from her. After greeting his daughter Mark handed her to a nurse that had followed them in.

"Mark I want my daughter back."

"Michelle is just going to change her, we need to talk to you Addi."

"Is everything okay, what is it?" Addison asked.

Mark sighed and took a seat next to Addison on the bed while Derek took a seat in the chair next to her. Mark looked at Derek quickly before turning his attention back to Addison. "Luke attacked Mer in the pit."

"What?"

"He was being transferred and there was an accident. When we got there he had her up against a wall choking her. She's okay. We put her on oxygen and she's sleeping. Izzie is with her and they should be bringing her up here so she doesn't have to be alone."

"What did Derek do?" Addison asked glancing to Derek.

"He pulled him off and I kept him from punching the guy. I didn't recognize him at first. After we got Mer checked and she fell asleep we came to tell you what happened."

Addison didn't say anything at first as she let what Mark just said sink in. Just as she was about to speak the door opened and Izzie helped a nurse wheel in Meredith's bed.

Izzie nodded to the nurse once Meredith was situated and the nurse left the room. She then turned back to Derek, Addison, and Mark. "She woke up about ten minutes ago. She had a little pain so we gave her some mild pain killers. They knocked her back out."

"Pain?" Addison asked.

"She has a nasty bruise on her back from when he forced her into the wall and then her neck. She didn't complain I just saw her wince when she went to sit up so I made her tell me. She didn't even want to take anything however Dr. Webber came in and told her she has the next week off so she might as well take them and she did."

"Thanks Izzie."

"I have to go. Bailey stopped by to see her, so did the others. I told them she was being moved up here and they all said they would stop by later so they could see her and you and Lilly Dr. Sloan."

"Izzie you can call me Addison, I'm not a doctor right now."

"Thanks Addison, I'll see you guys later." With one more look at Meredith Izzie left the room.

Addison looked at Meredith as she spoke. "She said she had a feeling. I told her it was wrong."

"What are you talking about?"

"Before Lilly was born. Mer said she had a feeling and was going to stay in bed today. Everything went perfect with Lilly and I told her this was one time when her feeling was wrong but it wasn't look at her Mark, why does she have to keep going through all this stuff?"

"I know it's tough Addi but at least she's not alone."

Derek, Mark, and Addison fell into a comfortable conversation until Derek and Mark were paged.

Mark and Derek went back down to the pit. When they entered there was a lot of commotion as a patient coded. They both ran to the table and found it was Luke. They then looked to the security guards silently questioning what happened.

"He just collapsed, there was nothing wrong with him."

Both Mark and Derek tried to revive him for another 30 minutes before Mark finally called time of death and then he turned to Derek. "Are you okay?"

Derek nodded, "I'm relieved is that wrong?" Derek finished with a frown.

"No." Mark patted Derek on the shoulder before continuing. "I have a feeling she will be too."

"I have to tell her."

"I know, Let's go see if she is awake yet."

"So how's mom?"

"What?"

"You were suppose to get mom from the airport while I was in surgery this morning." Derek said as he stopped and turned to Mark. "Don't tell me you forgot."

"Look I was a little side tracked with my daughter being born and all."

"Did you even call her?"

Mark took out his phone and started checking it. "I don't have any messages. Do you have any messages?"

Derek had taken his phone out checking it as well. "No."

"Crap, she is going to be upset." Derek laughed slightly as Mark continued. "She will get over it as soon as she sees her new granddaughter right?"

Derek patted his friend on the back. "Come on let's go check on Mer and Addi and then we can try and track mom down."

Mark and Derek both headed towards Addison's room.

Meredith slowly opened her eyes as the events of the day came back to her. She turned her head and found the bed next to her empty. As she went to sit up she flinched from the pain and heard the door open.

"Meredith what are you doing in that bed?"

"Elizabeth how are you?"

Elizabeth walked further into the room and went to Meredith's bed. Once she got close enough she saw the bruise and she rushed the rest of the way. "Honey what happened to you?"

"I'm fine Elizabeth. Have you seen Lilly yet?"

"What happened Meredith, why are you in this hospital bed with that bruise around your neck?" Elizabeth asked knowing Meredith was trying to change the subject.

"Addison's water broke after the elevator got stuck so I had to deliver Lilly. It went really fast but she is really beautiful." Meredith continued ignoring Elizabeth's question as she went to get out of bed. She had rolled onto her side so that her back was facing Elizabeth and when she went to sit up the blanket fell reveling her back since her shirt was scrunched up. Meredith winced as she shifted and then she heard Elizabeth's voice.

"Meredith Grey you better not make another move out of that bed." Elizabeth didn't yell but she left no room for argument as she made her way around the bed so she was standing right in front of Meredith.

"Where is Addi, you really have to see Lilly. I…"

Elizabeth reached up and tucked a piece of hair behind Meredith's ear so she could see her face better. "Honey, changing the subject and avoiding isn't going to work on me. We have talked too many times over the last few months for you to get away with that so the sooner you tell me what is going on the sooner I can see my granddaughter. Now tell me what happened to your neck and your back."

Meredith looked up into Elizabeth's eyes as she spoke. "Luke. He was here in the pit."

"What? I thought he was back in prison."

"He was being transferred somewhere and there was an accident. He came in with an officer and he pretended to be handcuffed to him. I was paged because I am Derek's intern today and when the nurse left the room…he wasn't handcuffed and he pushed me up against the wall and said he was going to make me pay for ruining his life. He started chocking me and then Derek came in. I think…I'm fine now."

"You think what?"

"I…I think everything is going to be okay now. I told him he can't hurt me anymore." Meredith paused as she took another look at Elizabeth before continuing. "I want to move on, I need to move on. I told him… I told him I forgive him. I'm not letting him have any control over my life anymore."

"You are amazing do you know that Meredith? After everything that he has done to you, you forgave him."

"I'm not amazing Elizabeth, I just…it's time to let go of my past. I…Derek...he makes me happy and…it's time to let go. I know I won't ever forget what he did to me but it's time for me to forgive him for hurting me."

Elizabeth gently enveloped Meredith in a hug. "I'm sorry you had to go through all this."

Meredith pulled back a little and smiled. "I'm not, I went through what I needed to so that I ended up here. I think I finally have a wonderful life, I have a wonderful family, and I love Derek more than I ever thought was possible. Now you really need to meet your new grand daughter and I need to make sure that Luke gets an MRI and CT before he goes back to prison. He didn't show any signs of injury however he was in the accident and I want to make sure he is okay." Meredith finished and went to get out of bed.

Elizabeth placed her hands on Meredith's shoulders to stop her. "You are not going anywhere. I can tell you are in pain. You are going to lay back down and rest. I will go find Derek and make sure he orders the tests you wanted."

"Elizabeth I…" Meredith stopped as she yawned and then continued. "I'm on duty Elizabeth and I'm really okay. You need to go see Lilly."

"Nancy was right, I think you are more stubborn than Derek. I saw that yawn now lay back down." Elizabeth saw that Meredith was going to protest so she cut her off. "Lay down…rest…now."

Meredith looked into Elizabeth's eyes and knew there was no way to fight so she did as she was told. She laid down and Elizabeth pulled the covers up to cover her as she closed her eyes.

Within minutes of pulling the covers up Elizabeth noticed Meredith was sleeping. She bent down and gave her a kiss on the forehead as she heard the door open. She turned to see Derek, Mark, and Addison enter with Addison carrying Lilly. Elizabeth stepped away from Meredith's bed and followed the three to Addison's side of the room. She gave Addison a hug and looked at Lilly. "You look beautiful Addison and she is just as beautiful."

Addison smiled. "Thank-you mom, do you want to hold her?"

"I would love to." Elizabeth took Lilly from Addison and cooed over her.

"How was your flight mom?"

"Don't you act all innocent with me Mark Sloan. You were suppose to pick me up, I had to take a cab."

"You made it and look at Lilly, she's beautiful isn't she?"

"She is and you are still not off the hook. You forgot me."

"But.."

Derek chuckled as he came to stand next to Mark after checking on Meredith.

"Don't think you are off the hook either. You should have been there since he wasn't."

"Me?"

"Yes you. He was here with his wife while she gave birth. You could have come."

"I was here for Mer."

"You should have called. Both of you should have called. I had to find out that my granddaughter was born in an elevator and then when I get here I had to find out that my daughter was hurt."

Derek, Mark, and Addison were all starring at Elizabeth with wide eyes.

"What are you three starring at?"

"You just said daughter."

"Don't act all surprised Derek. I have listened to you talk about her for years and after the conversation I just had with her I have no doubt that she is going to be my daughter soon."

"What conversation, she woke up, is she okay?" Derek quickly asked.

Elizabeth sat with the three and told them what happened. Derek then explained what had happened to Luke. After a few hours Meredith woke up and Derek and Mark were off. Since Mark was going to stay with Addison, Derek and Meredith invited Elizabeth to stay with them.

When they got home Derek told Meredith what had happened to Luke. The two spent a few hours talking before they finally fell asleep in each other's arms.

The next day Elizabeth and Meredith went to the hospital and spent time with Addison and Lilly while Derek and Mark worked. The morning after that, Addison and Lilly were discharged and Mark took them home. Elizabeth went and stayed with them.

On the fourth day of Elizabeth's visit, Addison and Mark had everyone over for dinner. Meredith, Derek, Christina, Izzie, Alex, and George were all there with Addison, Mark, Elizabeth, and Lilly.

Addison came down the stairs and joined everyone in the living room. "She's finally down."

"I can't believe how good she is."

"She is the best baby Iz. You should see her when we gave her a bath. She loves the water." Addison said with a smile.

"She still wakes you up at 2 in the morning, how good can that be?"

"She's only four days old Christina. My God daughter is the best baby ever."

"Our God daughter Der, and she is the best until we have our own." Meredith blurted out as the whole room went silent.

"Did you just say what I think you said?" Christina asked.

"Oh I think I've had a little too much to drink tonight, we should probably get going Der." Meredith said as she stood pulling on Derek's hand.

"What?" Derek asked still thinking about what Meredith had said about their own baby.

"Mer I think you need to pinch him. You lost him after you mentioned your own baby." Mark smiled.

"I did not say that Mark."

"Oh but you did Mer, we all heard it. And look at his face, Derek heard it as well." Mark replied as he pointed to Derek.

"We really should all get going, it's late and we have to work in the morning."

"Actually, not all of us have to work and I would like to hear more about your kids Mer."

"Evil Spawn if you don't shut it right this minute she will hurt you."

"Right Crack Whore, like she can hurt me with her ineffectual fists."

"Will you two grow up?"

"Zip it Barbi."

"Can't you guys cut it out for one night? Mrs. Shepperd doesn't need to hear this."

"Whatever Bambi."

"Alright children enough is enough." Mrs. Shepperd said as she smiled at the group.

"Well as fun as this has been it is getting late. Let's go George, Alex." Izzie said as she stood. Alex and George followed her.

Christina then stood as well. "Yeah it's been fun."

The four friends all said their goodbyes and left.

"Elizabeth do you want to go shopping tomorrow?" Addison asked when they heard a phone go off.

Meredith quickly picked up her cell. "It's me I'm sorry, I have to take this." She stood and walked to the other side of the room where she was standing in front of the picture window.

"You want to take Lilly out already?"

"No I'll be home with her mom. You can have a women's day or whatever it is you call it." Mark said from beside Addison.

"Are you sure you can handle Lilly all by yourself Mark?"

"Oh I won't be by myself mom, Derek will be here with me."

"What?" Derek asked quickly as he looked to Mark before turning his eyes back to Meredith.

Mark was going to reply when he was stopped.

"Why didn't you call me?"

There was silence while they waited to hear what else Meredith would say.

Meredith dropped the phone as tears came to her eyes. Derek was by her side in a second as she crumbled into his arms.

"Mer, what is it?" Derek asked however Meredith didn't answer as she cried into his chest. Derek looked up to his mom and friends.

Elizabeth bent over and picked up the cell phone that Meredith was on and placed it to her ear. "Hello?"

"_Ms. Grey?"_

"No, I'm a friend. Can I help you?"

"_I know this is a hard time but she is going to need to let us know her mother's wishes."_

"Oh Dear."

"_I can give you the name and number of the funeral home so she can call and make arrangements tomorrow. I know it's late so they won't expect a call tonight. We just had the minor details here at the nursing home."_

"Yes, I understand. Let me get a pen and paper." Elizabeth looked to Mark and Addison with sad eyes while Mark quickly got the pen and paper. "Okay go ahead." Elizabeth got the information and hung up. She looked down to a still sobbing Meredith and a confused Derek. She kneeled down next to Meredith on the other side of her. "Meredith honey, I'm so sorry."

Meredith looked up to Elizabeth with tears still coming down her cheeks. "I wasn't there…I should have been there."

"Meredith, it's okay. I know it's hard but she knew." Elizabeth pulled her into a hug as she looked at Derek. "It's hard losing your mother, but it will be okay."

Derek was surprised when his mother pulled Meredith into a hug but then he heard what she said. He knew Meredith's relationship with her mother wasn't good but she was still Meredith's mother and it was clearly affecting her.

Derek was pulled out of his thoughts by his mother's voice. "Derek we should take her home."

Meredith slowly composed herself and dried her tears as she sat up from Elizabeth's hold. "I'm okay." She then turned to Derek. "I need to go tell Richard. He should know."

Addison stepped forward. "You two can stay here tonight. You shouldn't drive."

"I'm fine Addi. I drove." Derek said as he helped Meredith up while Mark helped Elizabeth up.

"Derek you both will stay here. I will go get the other spare room ready, Mark." Addison left the room with Mark following.

"Are you okay staying here tonight Mer?"

Meredith nodded. "I have to call Richard." Meredith said as Derek led her to the couch and helped her sit down.

Soon Addison and Mark came down. "There's a sweatshirt and sweatpants for each of you in the room."

"Thank-you Mark." Meredith said as she stood up. "I…"

Mark pulled her into a hug. "It's okay Mer. Go get some rest, you can talk in the morning."

"I have to call Richard."

"Come on Mer, let's go up to bed." Derek said as he led her up the stairs.

Once they were upstairs, they both changed and laid down in bed. Elizabeth soon came up with some warm tea. "Meredith honey I thought you could use this."

"Thank-you." Meredith took the tea and took a few sips.

"Goodnight honey, I'll see you in the morning." Elizabeth then gave her a kiss on the forehead. She also gave Derek a kiss before leaving the room.

"Der, I need to call Richard."

"I'll call him Mer, just lay down and try to get some sleep okay?"

"Okay." Meredith said as she placed the tea cup on the night stand and laid down. As Derek wrapped his arms around her she spoke. "She had a heart attack. She was by herself Derek."

"I'm sorry Mer." Derek said as he held her tighter.

"I don't remember the last time she told me she loved me. I know she's not even close to your mom but I just..." Meredith trailed off.

"You still loved her. I get it Mer. I think she loved you the only way she knew how. She was a tough women and a great surgeon."

"I wish she would have been a great mom. I didn't want her to be alone."

"She wasn't alone Mer."

"I know she had the nurse with her but…she didn't have family Der. I just didn't want her to be alone."

"It's okay Mer. We'll make sure that everything is done just like she wanted tomorrow."

"We?"

"I'm not letting you make arrangements by yourself. Besides I'm sure my mom will be there as well."

Meredith's eyes were starting to close as she spoke. "Your mom doesn't have to help. Mom wrote down everything so it won't take long."

Derek knew Meredith was close to sleeping as he listened to her voice and felt her relaxing in his arms. "We'll talk more in the morning Mer." Derek pulled the covers up around her and gave her a soft kiss on the lips. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight Der, I love you."

"I love you too."

After a few minutes Derek knew she was asleep. He quietly made his way out of the room and headed back down stairs where he found his mom, Mark, and Addison. He walked into the living room and sat on the couch next to Mark sighing as he sat.

"Is she sleeping honey?"

Derek nodded. "I have to call Richard and then I'm going to head back up to be with Mer."

"I called him Derek. He asked how Mer was and said she should take as much time as she needs."

"Thanks Addi. She said Ellis had everything wrote down so it shouldn't take long tomorrow."

"Do you know what happened?"

"She had a heart attack."

The room was silent until Derek's mom spoke. "You should go get some sleep Derek. Meredith is going to need you tomorrow."

"I know mom. I already told her I would be with her." Derek stood from the couch. "Goodnight. Thanks for letting us stay." Derek gave his mom and Addison a hug before heading up stairs.

The next day the arrangements were made. Two days later there was a small ceremony and Meredith spread the ashes of Ellis Grey into a flower bed right outside the hospital knowing that Ellis always preferred to be at the hospital and in a way she was there forever.

_Hope you liked chapter 16. As you can tell there was a time jump and I am starting to wrap things up. Don't worry I still have some drama planned...Please review and let me know what you think. I could end it right away if need be. Thank-you to those of you still reading and to everyone that has reviewed the last 15 chapters...it's because of you all that I am still writing._


	17. Chapter 17

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy or it's characters._

Chapter 17

Meredith ran into the exam room and found Christina standing there. "I was paged 911. Where's the patient?"

Christina just stared at her. "I missed out on a surgery today for this and he better pay up or else." Christina hissed as she shoved an envelope in Meredith's hands and walked to the door. Once she reached the door she turned and spoke one more time before storming out. "And for the record you two are discussing."

Meredith turned towards the door to speak however Christina was already gone. She looked down and saw the envelope had her name on it. She sighed and opened it. As soon as she saw the familiar writing a smile came to her lips.

_Mer,_

_I love you more than I can tell you and I want to show you today. I have taken the liberty of speaking to the chief (you can yell at me later) and you have the rest of the day off. Since I drove to work this morning I left my keys in your locker so please go change and meet me at the place where you learned that it is okay to show your true feelings._

_Love Always,_

_Derek_

_P.S. If you haven't noticed you are standing in the exact exam room where you stole a piece of my heart. _

Meredith folds the note and puts it back into the envelope as she goes to change. During her walk she started to think about where she was going. After changing and making her way to the car she realized what where he was.

Meredith quickly got in and drove. Once she reached her destination she made her way into the building and up to the once familiar door. She found Alex sitting in the hallway by the door. "Alex?"

"Hey Mer, I'm glad it didn't take you too long."

"What are you talking about, why are you at our old apartment and where is Derek?"

"All I know is that he owes me." Alex replied as he handed her another envelope, gave her a hug, and started to walk away. He turned around before he got too far and spoke. "He's a lucky guy Mer."

Meredith knew Alex had said something but she didn't hear him clearly as she had already opened the envelop and was reading the note that was placed into it.

_Mer,_

_Do you remember the first night you spent in this apartment? From that night on I started sleeping on the couch and I wouldn't have had it any other way. This is where we got to know each other and you stole another piece of my heart as you gave me glimpses of you. I had to make another stop so please meet me at our place of thinking…I have a thing for them…_

_Love Always,_

_Derek_

_P.S. All the time I spent on the couch during these months should be remembered for our future___

Meredith placed the note back in the envelop and immediately knew where she was going. While she was driving she kept trying to figure out what he was talking about when he said the time on the couch should be remembered for their future.

Soon Meredith found herself at the docks and when she got out of the car she saw George. She made her way to him. "Hey George."

"Hey Mer. I have to get back so here you go. He's a good guy Mer." George said as he handed her another envelop. He gave her a quick hug and walked away.

Meredith quickly opened it up and started to read.

_Mer,_

_This place is almost as beautiful as you are when we come at sunset. It's so peaceful here and I am so glad that you share my love of ferryboats…yet another thing I love about you. I'm sorry I missed you. Do you remember where you decided to learn to love and in making that decision you also decided to let me be the one to teach you? Please meet me there._

_Love Always,_

_Derek_

_P.S. You stole another piece of my heart when you told me of your love for ferryboats._

Meredith was already back in the car driving to her next destination. She had a smile on her face thinking about how Derek had put all this together for her when he could have just left a note asking to go to dinner. She soon pulled into the familiar driveway and made her way to the door.

Addison opened the door with Lilly in her arms smiling. "Hey Mer."

"Addi, is Derek here? I didn't see his car."

"He was but he didn't stay long. He did leave this for you." Addison said as she handed the envelop to Meredith and gave her a hug.

Meredith gave Lilly a kiss on the forehead and thanked Addison as she turned to leave.

"I'm glad you let him teach you Mer." Addison said as she quickly stepped back inside and closed the door when she saw the confused look on Meredith's face.

Meredith wanted to ask Addison what she was talking about however she was more excited about the note so she made her way back to the car and read the note.

_Mer,_

_That night that you decided to let me teach you about Love was the happiest night of my life so far. That night was the night you openly admitted to yourself and to me that we were more than friends and that helped us get to where we are now. I guess I missed you again. I had another stop to make so please meet where we share our life with your family and friends who have been my friends and will soon be my family._

_Love Always,_

_Derek_

_P.S. When you nodded and smiled after I asked you to let me teach you…you took another piece of my heart._

Again she was driving knowing exactly where she was going. It didn't take long before she pulled into another familiar driveway. When she got out of the car she saw her friend sitting on the porch swing. "Iz what are you doing home?"

"Just waiting for you." Izzie said with a smile as she jumped up and made her way to Meredith. She handed her an envelope. "Sorry I can't stay and read it with you, Bailey said I had to get back as soon as possible or I would be on scut so I'll see you later." Izzie gave Meredith a hug and spoke one last time before leaving. "I'm really happy for you Mer, you deserve it."

_Mer,_

_You amaze me! With everything you have told me about what it was like living in this house, I would never had imagined that you would step foot in it again let alone smile and choose to live here but you did. I know you can't forget about what happened in the past but I am glad that you have shared your past with me and you are letting me be part of your new memories in this house. Your friends love you very much and I wouldn't expect anything less than you sharing this house with them when you found out they needed somewhere to live. You keep your heart guarded but when you open it up you don't hold back and this is another thing I love about you. All the time we have spent here has made memories that I will never forget. Well yet again I missed you. Please meet me at the place where you realized from now on the only steps you take will be forward._

_Love Always,_

_Derek_

_P.S. You stole another piece of my heart when you asked me to be a part of your new memories by letting me stay with you here._

Meredith quickly drove to her next destination wondering if she had forgotten an anniversary or something important. She made her way through the doors and quickly made her way to Derek.

Meredith opened the door and frowned when she saw who was sitting there. "Mark."

"Hey Mer don't be so disappointed." Mark quickly stood up and made his way to Meredith.

"I'm not…where's Derek?"

"Here." Mark simply said as he handed her an envelope.

Meredith looked at Mark waiting for him to leave however he didn't move. "Don't you have to leave?"

"Just open the envelop Mer."

Meredith did as she was told and started reading.

_Mer,_

_I know this was a tough day for you but this day was the day that you finally admitted not only to me but to our friends why you didn't want to come back to Seattle. I can't imagine what my life would be like right now if you hadn't come back. You are stronger than anyone I know Mer. Don't get me wrong you are also stubborn as hell and I still love you. With everything that you have been through you still let yourself smile. You took another piece of my heart when I realized how strong you are. I can't wait to see you. Mark is going to bring you to me. He has strict instructions. I love you and I'll see you soon._

_Love Always,_

_Derek_

_P.S. You can ask him all you want where he is taking you but he knows if he utters one work about it then Lilly will grow up without a father…see you soon!_

Meredith smiled as she looked up to Mark and put away the envelop. "So?"

Mark rolled his eyes at her smile. "Let's go." With that Mark led them out of the on call room and down to the parking lot. He opened the door for her and once she was in he quickly made his way to the driver's side. He entered the car and turned to her. "Okay, you have to put this on." Mark said as he held up a blind fold.

"Seriously?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

Meredith studied him for a few seconds and then gave in. She took it from him and put it on. Mark made sure it was on and then turned to look out the window. He smiled as he saw their friends all there watching them and of course Izzie had a camera snapping away as he drove out of the parking lot.

Mark was grateful that the drive wasn't long. Meredith had been asking questions nonstop since they left the hospital. "Where are we going Mark? Did I forget something? Is Derek mad?"

Mark had a smile on his face even though he was annoyed with her. "Are you done yet?"

"Are we there yet?"

"No."

"Then I'm not done."

"I think this is the most I've heard you talk. I don't know how Derek puts up with you."

"Derek knows how I am about surprises. Besides he thinks my rambling is cute so he says."

"Whatever, we're here but you have to leave that on. I'll help you out." Mark saw her nod and then quickly jumped out. He made his way around the car and opened the door helping her out. Once she was out he saw Derek waiting. Mark gave Meredith a hug and whispered. "He's a lucky guy Mer and you deserve to be happy so let yourself."

"Mark?"

"Just keep the blindfold on until your told to take it off and I'll see you later." Mark smiled to Derek and then he got back in the car and drove off.

Meredith heard him drive away and listened for another car however she didn't hear one. She then felt his presence. "Derek?"

Derek started towards Meredith and didn't say anything.

"Derek can I take this thing off now?"

"Just a minute Mer." Derek reached Meredith and gently grabbed her arm and started to lead her forward. "I want to show you something." Derek walked her forward a little further and then they stopped. He then turned to her and pulled off the blindfold.

"Wow." Meredith said as soon as her eyes focused on what was in front of her.

"Is that all you can say?"

"It's beautiful. When did you…why didn't you…is it ready…can we…wow…"

Derek let out a chuckle before he spoke. "I just got the keys last week and our furniture should be here by the end of the week. I was hoping you wouldn't notice that I took the catalog so I could place the orders. Everything is ready once we get the furniture."

"Can we go in?"

"Of course. Let's go." Derek grabbed her hand as they made their way towards their home.

They toured the empty house and when they got to the master bedroom Meredith made her way to the balcony. She looked out and turned to Derek.

"What's that?" She asked pointing.

"That is our supper. Come on. I figured since we don't have furniture we could have a picnic."

Meredith let Derek lead her out of the house and they made their way to where the picnic was set up. Once they were there they enjoyed the food that Derek had brought. When they finished eating Derek pulled Meredith into his arms and they laid there waiting for the sun to set.

It didn't take long for them to fall into a comfortable silence and then Derek spoke. "Mer?"

"Yeah?"

Derek shifted so that he could look at Meredith and he grabbed her hand. "You asked me once how I know what you need and want, do you remember?" Derek paused while he looked at Meredith who slightly nodded. "I didn't answer you the way I wanted to that night so I want to give you the answer now. I know because I love you Meredith. I love everything about you. I look in your eyes and I know what you are thinking. I look at your body language and I know how you are feeling. I know everything about you Meredith and it's because I love you. You have learned how to show your feelings, we share the same thinking spot, you have let me teach you what love is and in return let me love you. You have shared your friends and family with me even though they can be a little scary, you have agreed to only go forward from now on, and you are extremely stubborn. Since I met you, you have been taking pieces of my heart and now you have my whole heart Mer. I love you more than I ever thought possible and I don't want my heart back. Meredith Grey, will you marry me?"

Meredith had listened to everything Derek was saying and as he pulled out the ring and asked the question her hands flew to her mouth. The tears that had been threatening to fall were let loose as she looked into his eyes. She could see Derek smile start to falter as the worry appeared in his eyes and she realized that she hadn't answered him yet. She removed her hands from her mouth and still looking into his eyes she answered. "YES!" She then saw the smile on Derek's face grow even bigger and the worry left his eyes as she spoke again and threw her arms around him. "Yes Derek, yes I'll marry you."

Derek wrapped his arms around Meredith and then he realized she hadn't taken the ring so he pulled back. "This now belongs to you." Derek then placed the ring on her finger.

"It's beautiful Derek."

"Only the best for you Mer. You have made me the happiest man alive."

"And you have made me the happiest women alive. Thank-you."

"For what?"

"Loving me. I know it hasn't always been easy."

"I wouldn't have it any other way Mer." Derek pulled her in for a kiss which she deepened.

The kiss turned into more. After the two celebrated their new engagement they made their way to the car and went back to Meredith's house where all their friends were waiting for them so they could all celebrate together.

Within the next week the house was completely finished and Derek and Meredith had moved in. The house was perfect and Derek and Meredith quickly fell into a routine which included going to work together whenever possible. They also had their friends over at least once a week for a 'family' dinner which Derek cooked with the help of Izzie and Addison.

Two months after moving into the house, Meredith rolled over and shut the alarm off. They had been living together and engaged for 2 months now and she slightly smiled when she looked over to see him starting to stir. All of the sudden she jumped up and went to the bathroom.

As soon as he felt her leap off the bed he was up and headed to the bathroom right after her pushing the door open he saw her hunched over the toilet empting her stomach. "Mer?" Derek bent down next to her rubbing her back he continued once she seemed to be finished. "I don't think this is just the flu. Please let me take you with today and you can see a doctor."

Meredith pulled out of his grasp and stood slowly before heading to the sink and brushing her teeth. "Derek I'm a doctor and I know how I am when I'm sick. You don't have to worry about me."

"Mer, I love you worrying when you are not feeling good is part of that."

"Derek you have a surgery that you can't miss, besides this is my only day off."

Derek watched her closely for a few seconds and then realized he needed to get going so he wouldn't be late. "I'll stop right now however if this continues then I am taking you to a doctor and if I have to tell the chief or Bailey to get you there I will understood?"

Meredith smiled at him as she crawled back into bed. "Understood. I'll call you later."

"No you rest. I'll call on my way home."

"Okay." Meredith replied already with her eyes closed.

Derek walked back to the bed and gave her a quick kiss before heading out. "I love you."

"Love you too." Meredith whispered.

Derek turned and left heading to the hospital.

Meredith woke up a couple hours later having to run to the bathroom again. After getting cleaned up and dressing she made her way to the hospital. Checking her watch one more time she knew Derek was in surgery so she headed up to see Addison.

Stepping out of the elevator she saw Addison at the nurses' station and made her way towards her. "Hey Addison."

Addison turned and saw Meredith. "Hello Mer. I thought it was your day off?"

Meredith smiled. "It is. Can we talk?"

Addison looked a little closer at Meredith and nodded. "We can go to my office."

They made their way to Addison's office. Meredith took a seat and Addison sat across from her behind the desk.

"Are you alright Mer?" Addison asked however Meredith didn't answer right away. "Meredith?"

"I think maybe…I think…well…"

"Meredith."

"IthinkImightbepregnant."

"Really?" Addison asked with a smile.

Meredith nodded and then told Addison why she felt she was pregnant. After she finished and Addison had asked some questions, Addison stood and went to Meredith. She drew some blood and sent it off for testing. She requested a rush so Meredith decided to wait. The two fell into easy conversation mostly about Lilly and how much they both knew Derek wanted kids. Meredith admitted she wanted children as well.

After what felt like forever the test results were delivered. Addison opened the results and quickly looked over them before looking up to Meredith.

"Well?"

"Congratulations."

"Really? I mean I'm really pregnant?" Meredith asked as she jumped up from her chair.

"Really Mer. You and Derek are going to have a baby and Lilly is going to have a playmate."

Meredith smiled and gave Addison a hug as some tears escaped her eyes. "I can't…Derek's going to be…wow…"

"Are you going to tell Derek?"

"Of course but…" Meredith paused as she thought for a moment before continuing. "I want to surprise him. I don't just want to tell him."

"What are you thinking?"

"A sonogram picture…Addi can you…and then I can leave it out or something and see how long it takes him to figure it out."

Addison smiled. "That's perfect. Come on let's do it now."

"No I can't. How about tomorrow morning? I work tomorrow so it won't be unusual for me to be here and we can do it during Derek's first surgery so he won't know I'm missing. Are you here tomorrow?"

"Yes that would work. Are you going to be able to not tell him tonight?"

"As long as I can make it through lunch I will be okay. He has back to back surgeries so I'll be asleep when he gets home."

"This is wonderful, I can't wait to tell Mark."

"Don't you dare! You have to keep this a secret Addi, you can't tell Mark until Derek knows. Promise me."

"Okay it will be hard but I won't say anything."

"Great, I have to go find Derek for lunch. He was worried about me this morning so I want to show him I am okay."

"Worried?"

Meredith smiled. "Morning sickness."

"I see." Addison smiled as her pager went off. "I have to go, I'll see you tomorrow."

Meredith left the office and went to find Derek.

Somehow Meredith had made it through the night and through the morning without telling Derek. Addison had asked for her that day and the sonogram was scheduled for early afternoon while Derek was scheduled for a surgery.

"I can't believe this Addi. I never thought...I mean Lilly is….but this is…"

"Mer calm down." Addison said with a chuckle because of how excited Meredith was. "Go get changed and I'll do the exam first."

Meredith went into the bathroom to change. "Derek is going to be so happy, I can't wait to see his face." Meredith came back out and made her way to the exam table.

"Are you sure you don't want him here for this Mer?"

"No he's in surgery and this will be fun. I'll show him the picture tonight."

"Okay let's get started." Addison said as she started the exam. "Everything looks good so far Mer. You are about 2 months along."

"Wow." Meredith said as she thought back to 2 months ago. She smiled knowing that it had to have been the night Derek purposed.

"By that smile I am guessing you know when this little one was conceived."

Meredith nodded.

"Alright let's take a look at this little one." Addison put the gel on Meredith and started looking for an image. It soon came up. "There is your baby."

"Addi." Meredith said as tears came to her eyes.

Addison saw the tears and pulled away from Meredith. "Oh Mer, do you want me to page Derek?"

"No I'm fine it's just that Derek is going to be so happy about this and…just print out a couple copies." Meredith smiled and then added, "Can we maybe

hear the heart beat?"

"Of course we can. Alright let's try this again and no tears Mer."

Meredith giggled. "I'm sorry it's just so…"

"I know. I did the same thing at my first appointment." Addison looked closer at the screen and didn't say anything.

Meredith had been looking at the screen and waiting for the heartbeat when she noticed a change in Addison. "Addison?"

Addison was studying the image and trying to find the heartbeat for Meredith. She felt tears in her eyes as she slowly moved her hand that was not on Meredith down to her side and pressed a button on her pager. She quickly looked down and then without looking at Meredith she made herself speak. "I have to check on this Mer. I'll be right back." Addison quickly left the room.

As she came out she started for the bathroom that was just down the hall. Addison was not someone who runs however in this moment she wanted nothing more than to run. Due to the heels she was wearing she settled for a very fast walk. She knew she was close when she bumped into someone.

"What's the hurry Addi, you're not pregnant again are you?" Mark chuckled as he caught her so she wouldn't hit the ground. When Addison didn't say anything or lift her face to him Mark gently lifted her chin so she was looking at him. That's when he saw the tears. "Addi?"

"Oh Mark." Addison let out as she fell into his arms.

"Addi what is it what happened?" Mark asked almost frantic. He wasn't use to Addison being this upset. Addison didn't answer and Mark pulled her into an on call room. "Addison what happened?"

Addison calmed herself and looked to her husband. "Meredith…Mark it's Meredith."

"What's wrong, what happened to Mer?"

"She…she's pregnant…but…"

"Addison."

"She just found out. She's 2 months along and I was just doing the sonogram but…there's no heartbeat Mark. The baby, the baby isn't alive."

"No." Mark said stunned before his senses caught up. "How is Mer and Derek?"

"They don't know. Mer wanted to surprise Derek and show him the picture."

"So you have to tell Mer her baby isn't alive and you have to tell Derek that Meredith is pregnant however he will never get to see his son or daughter." Mark said thinking about what his life would be like without Lilly.

Addison had now pulled herself together and is now back to her professional self. "I need you to page Derek. He is in surgery right now but he needs to be with Mer when I tell her."

"What do I tell him?"

"I don't care Mark just get him here."

Mark gave Addison a hug and kiss before leaving the on call room. He headed to the OR to find Derek. On his way he ran into the Chief. "Chief I need Derek can you get someone to finish his surgery?"

"Why Dr. Sloan?"

"It's personal Chief. It's important…I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important."

The Chief studied Mark's face for a moment before speaking. "I can take over for him, it's a simple procedure."

The Chief quickly scrubbed in before he followed Mark into the OR.

"Chief, Dr. Sloan, what do I owe the pleasure?"

"Derek."

Something about Mark's voice made Derek look up and take a closer look at Mark. "What is it Mark?"

"Derek."

"Meredith."

Mark only nodded as he shared a look with the chief. Derek didn't say anything else as he left the OR and went into the scrub room. Mark joined him.

"Is she alright?"

"I…come on." Mark said not knowing what else to say.

The two made their way to the elevator and up to maternity. Within minutes Mark was leading Derek into the on call room where they found Addison.

"Addi, where's Mer?" Derek asked a little confused that Meredith wasn't there.

Addison looked to Mark. "I couldn't tell him out there."

Addison sighed knowing he was right. She approached Derek and ushered him to a chair.

"What is going on?"

"Mer…Meredith is…" Addison paused not really knowing how to tell him. Normally she wouldn't say anything since Meredith was her patient however she knew that Meredith needed Derek there when she found out. Then the thoughts she was having since Mark left her along came back. She was going to make his day and ruin it all in a matter of seconds. She looked into his eyes and started. "Meredith is pregnant." She went to continue however Derek cut her off as he jumped up.

"Pregnant…as in baby? Wow this is great, wow I can't believe I didn't think of this before…"

It pained her but she knew she had to tell him everything. "Derek…"

"Why didn't she tell me? She must be so excited and maybe a little freaking out. Where is she?"

"Derek…I was doing the sonogram and…" She stopped as tears came to her eyes knowing how happy he was.

"Sonogram that means pictures. Can I see the pictures?"

"Derek! There are no pictures. Meredith wanted to surprise you tonight. Today was her first appointment and when I was trying to find the heartbeat…Derek there's no heartbeat."

"What?" Derek knew what she said but he needed her to spell it out for him.

"The baby, your baby isn't alive. I need to do a DNC. I'm so sorry."

Derek didn't say anything as the words sunk in. She was pregnant…Meredith was pregnant however the baby was dead. All of the sudden the only thing he wanted was Meredith. "Where is she?"

"She's in room 3154 but Derek she doesn't know yet."

Derek stopped in front of the closed door as he heard Addison say she didn't know yet.

Addison continued. "I set my pager off so I could leave the room. I knew you had to be with her when she finds out. I don't know how she will take it but she can't be alone."

Derek nodded as he took a moment to compose himself. He then turned back to his friends. "Okay…let's go."

The three of them made their way out of the on call room and headed to exam room where Meredith was.

Meredith was a little surprised that Addison left in such a hurry knowing that she didn't have any patients since they were working together. She settled on thinking the pit paged her so she turned her attention to the image that was still on the screen and then down to her stomach. "You are the luckiest little one in the world you know that? Your daddy is…he is perfect and he is going to be an amazing father. Derek was born to be a daddy and he is going to be amazing little one. Oh you are going to have so many people that love you once they know about you. I never thought about having a baby but with him he changed that. I can't wait to tell them all about you but first we have to tell your daddy. I was thinking I could show him a picture and surprise him what do you think? Do you think he will like that? I want it to be fun but I'm not very good at this, your daddy is the cheesy one in the family. As you can tell I ramble. I just thought I should warn you, your daddy thinks it's cute."

Addison slowly opened the door and heard Meredith talking. She looked back to Mark and Derek who had also heard. Derek quickly wiped his eyes while Mark gave her a soft nod. She turned back to Meredith. "Mer?"

"Oh Addi I changed my mind. I want to wait to hear the heartbeat when I come back with Der. I think he would be mad if he knew I had already heard the heartbeat." Meredith said still looking at her stomach.

Addison pushed further into the room with Derek and Mark behind her. "Meredith?"

Meredith looked up in shock when she saw Derek and Mark with Addison. "Derek, what are you doing here? Addi?"

Derek went to Meredith's side. "Mer."

"Derek I wanted to surprise you." Meredith said looking down. She quickly looked back up with a big smile on her face. "Surprise…you're going to be a daddy!"

"Mer." Derek tried to speak.

"I just found out yesterday and I was trying to think of the perfect way to tell you because I know you like the cheesy stuff so I was going to get the sonogram picture from today and surprise you tonight but Addi got a page and…how did you know where I was? Addi?" Meredith finished looking to Addison. She saw Mark had his arm around her waist and she noticed the somber look on both of their faces. "Addison why did you tell Derek. I wanted to surprise him. You knew that."

"Mer I had Mark page Derek because…"

"Addi I really wanted to surprise him how could you…"

Addison interrupted her wanting to get out what she had to before she lost her nerve. "Meredith I had Mark page Derek because I need to tell you about the baby."

"You didn't have to ruin my surprise. I wanted to tell Derek about our baby."

"Meredith honey there is no baby." Addison blurted out.

The room went silent until Meredith spoke. "Addi you don't have to say that now. It's okay that Derek knows. Of course I would have liked to have told him but it's okay, I'm not mad."

Addison stepped closer to the bed and grabbed Meredith's hand. "No Mer that's not what I'm saying. Your baby is…there's no heartbeat Mer. There is no baby." Addison finished with tears in her eyes.

Meredith felt both Addison and Derek squeeze her hands and as Addison's words sunk in tears sprung to her eyes. She pulled her hands away and covered her stomach as she whispered, "No."

"I'm so sorry Mer but…"

"No, no Addison you're lying."

"Mer."

"No Derek she's lying. She didn't look close enough and she got a page she just missed it."

"Mer Addi's good at what she does she doesn't miss anything."

"No Derek, she missed this." Meredith said with tears in her eyes. She turned back to Addison. "Try again."

"Mer."

"Try again Addi. No distractions this time. Try again."

Addison looked to Mark who gave her a sympathetic look. Then she looked to Derek who gave her a nod. She went to the machine as Meredith laid back down and pulled her shirt back up. Addison then put the gel on Meredith's stomach and moved the wand around again searching for the heartbeat.

"See Derek, there's our baby Derek. Do you see?"

Derek had tears in his eyes as he took Meredith's hand again. "Mer."

"No Derek just give it a minute sometimes it takes a little longer."

Addison moved the wand around again and again and there was nothing. She looked to Mark who came up to her and shut off the machine. She then turned back to her friends. "I'm so sorry Mer. The baby didn't make it. I need to perform a DNC."

"No Addi. You didn't look hard enough." Meredith said barely above a whisper.

Derek bent down to her as he gave her a kiss on the forehead. "It's going to be okay Mer, we'll get through this." He then looked back up to Mark and Addison as Meredith let out a sob. "Can you give us a few minutes?"

Mark nodded as he led Addison out of the room. Once they were out in the hall he pulled Addison in for a hug.

Once the door closed, Derek turned his attention to Meredith who was laying on her side holding her stomach. "Mer?"

"You are meant to be a daddy Derek. I'm so sorry." Meredith whispered out.

"We will be parents when the time is right and this isn't your fault Mer."

"I haven't been taking any vitamins and I should have known. I killed your baby Derek, I'm so sorry…so sorry."

"Meredith Grey this is not your fault and I won't have you thinking it is. I don't know why this happened but I know without a doubt that this was not your fault and if I have to spend forever getting you to believe that I will. I love you Meredith and this was not your fault."

Meredith looked at him knowing that no matter what she said he would be his dreamy self. She looked him in the eyes and saw the love that he was talking about but she also saw the misery. In that moment she knew what she had to do even if it hurt like hell. She blinked back a few tears as she looked at his chest and spoke. "I'm ready…tell Addison I'm ready."

Derek sighed frustrated that she wouldn't really look at him but he complied just wanting to get this over with so he could get her home. He gave her a quick kiss on the forehead before he made his way to the door and as he opened it he found Addison and Mark. "She's ready."

Addison had the OR prepped and took Meredith away. She did the DNC with no complications and followed her back to recovery where she found Mark and Derek waiting. "Everything went well. She will be sore for a couple days but everything should be fine."

Derek nodded his thanks and then quickly looked up to Addison. "Will she…"

Addison didn't let him finish. "There is no reason why she wouldn't be able to have kids in the future. She didn't do anything to cause this Derek and don't let her think that."

"She already does Addi."

"I don't know why this happened Derek but this wasn't her fault and it wasn't yours either. When she wakes up she can go home but she needs to rest for a couple days"

Mark and Addison stepped away as Derek made his way to Meredith so that he could sit with her.

Mark and Addison had told Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George what had happened. Each of them went to check on Meredith and make sure she was okay.

Before long Meredith woke up. Derek helped her get dressed and got her to the car and started for their house.

"Take me home please."

"I am sweetheart."

"No Derek take me home to my house."

"Mer?"

Meredith heard the shock in his voice and knew she was hurting him but she couldn't think of anything else to do so she continued. "You have to work and I don't want to be alone."

"I took a couple days off Mer so you won't be alone."

"You can't take time off Derek people need you. I'm just going to sleep you don't need to be there for that. You don't need to take time off to watch me sleep."

"Mer…"

"No Derek not now please…I'm just too tired to do this now…I want to sleep."

Derek nodded and the rest of the ride was silent. Derek pulled into the driveway of the familiar house and helped Meredith out of the car. They went to the door where Izzie met them. She quickly ushered them in and Derek took Meredith upstairs to her old room. Once she was settled she fell right to sleep. Derek watched her for a few minutes before making his way downstairs where he found Izzie.

"Is she asleep?"

"Yes as soon as her head hit the pillow."

"She'll be okay Derek just give her time."

"I know her Izzie. She thinks this is her fault."

"Of course she does. She was carrying the baby. You have to give her time Derek, don't push this or you will push her away."

"I just want to be here for her."

"You will be just let her come to you. Are you going back to the hospital?"

Derek nodded. "I have one more surgery that I pushed back. I'll stop and grab some dinner on my way home if you would like."

"That sounds good. It's been a long day and I don't think I want to cook tonight."

"Okay, I'll call when I leave the hospital to see who's home."

"Okay, see you later Derek."

"By Iz." Derek said as he left.

Derek finished his surgery and stopped on the way home to pick up dinner. When he got back to the house he found Meredith still sleeping. Izzie told him that Meredith had woke up a couple times and then went back to sleep. Izzie, Alex, Derek, and George all ate dinner before Derek made his way upstairs. He made his way into bed after getting ready. It didn't take long before he too fell asleep with Meredith in his arms.

Meredith woke and immediately felt Derek's arms wrapped around her. She slowly reached up and removed his arms from her as she slipped out of bed. She felt some pain however she ignored it knowing she didn't have much time looking at the clock. As quickly as she could she got dressed and threw some things into a bag. She walked back to the bed and while a tear rolled down her cheek she bent down and gave Derek a kiss on the cheek. "I love you Derek."

Meredith took her bag and made her way downstairs. She saw Derek's keys on the counter next to Izzie's and Alex's. She took a pen and quickly wrote out two notes setting one under Izzie and Alex's keys. Meredith took the second note and set it under Derek's placing something else with it.

Once the notes were finished she picked up her bag and made her way to the door. She made her way out to her car. With some difficulty she loaded her bag into her Jeep and then took her spot behind the wheel. With one last look and a deep breath she started the jeep and drove away. Meredith drove to the airport and after only a half an hour wait she boarded her plane.

When the plane landed she quickly got her bag and hailed a taxi. The drive didn't take long before she was standing in front of a house that she hadn't seen yet. With another deep breath she made her way to the door and knocked.

"Meredith?"

"Michael, is Nancy home?"

Just as Michael was going to answer Nancy appeared. "Meredith! I'm so glad to see you." She exclaimed as she practically pushed Michael out of the way to hug Meredith.

Meredith flinched as Nancy hugged her still sore. Nancy pulled back and asked. "What is it Mer did I hurt you?"

"No Nancy, I'm fine."

"Mer I know you better than that."

Meredith thought for a moment and decided to just tell Nancy the truth. "I'm still a little sore. I had a DNC early this afternoon."

"You what?"

"It's not a big deal Nancy I just need to sit down."

"Right of course honey come in." Nancy lead her into the house and then turned back to Michael. "Can you please bring her bag in?"

"Of course." Michael said as he grabbed Meredith's bag and followed them to the living room where Nancy had helped Meredith to take a seat.

"Where is Derek?"

"He's at home."

"What, I can't believe my brother is that brainless that he would let his fiancé travel so soon."

Meredith looked down at her hands that were in her lap. "He didn't and he's not my fiancé."

"Meredith?"

"I left."

"What do you mean you left? What happened Mer?"

"I…can we not do this now? I just want to sleep some. I was hoping maybe you could refer me to a good hotel for a couple days maybe?"

"You won't need a hotel Meredith. The guest room is ready. I've already put your bag in there." Michael said as he appeared in front of the two.

"I don't want to be a burden."

"Nonsense Meredith, you are family. Now let me help you to your room." Michael said for Nancy as he looked to his wife and shared a look.

After helping Meredith to the guest room he excused himself after saying goodnight to Meredith and his wife knowing it would be awhile before Nancy joined him.

After Nancy helped Meredith get changed she helped her into bed and sad down beside her holding her hand. "Mer please tell me what happened."

"I'm tired Nancy."

"I know honey but I won't be able to sleep if you don't tell me what happened. Please Mer."

"I was pregnant…two months. I hadn't told Derek yet. I went to Addi to confirm and I wanted her to do a sonogram. I was going to show Derek the picture to tell him. Addi did the sonogram this morning but…there was no heartbeat so she did the DNC."

"Oh Mer I'm so sorry." Nancy squeezed her hand and wiped a tear from her eye as she looked at her friend who looked so broken. "Where's Derek Mer, why did you leave?"

"I can't have children Nancy."

"Did Addi tell you that?"

"She didn't have to. I…I had a miscarriage before…after Luke. And now this…I'm not meant to carry a baby."

"Oh Mer you can't think that and what does that have to do with Derek?"

"You know how Derek is with kids. He is meant to be a daddy. He can't have that with me so he needs to find someone else, someone who can give him children."

"Mer, did you talk to Derek about this?"

Meredith shook her head gently. "You know how Derek is…he doesn't think about himself. I know he will try and be all comforting to me but he needs to think about himself Nancy and the Derek I know and love would not be happy without kids. This is better for everyone and I hope one day we can be friends."

"You love him. Meredith you need to talk to him."

"I…can't…I can't have his babies Nancy." Meredith started to cry as the events of the day came crashing down on her. "My baby…our baby…died…dead. It's my fault Nancy…"

Nancy's heart was breaking as she heard her friend and she wished more than anything that Derek was there knowing that Meredith needed him more than anything. She reached down and pulled Meredith into a hug and gently rocked her. "Sshh Mer, this isn't your fault."

"I didn't want kids Nancy…I knew I wasn't meant to be a mom…Derek…I let him go…Nancy…I let him go."

"Sshh Mer it's okay, everything will be okay." Nancy pulled back and quickly grabbed for Meredith's pain pills and the glass of water that was sitting on the nightstand. "Here Mer take one and get some rest. We can talk more in the morning."

Meredith nodded and did as Nancy told her. She settled back down in bed and it didn't take long before she was sleeping.

Nancy gave her a quick kiss on the forehead. "Goodnight Mer."

"Goodnight Derek, I'm sorry. I love you." Meredith replied in her sleep.

Nancy made her way to her bedroom and quickly got ready for bed. She then climbed in next to Michael who had put his book down. "How is she?"

"She's sleeping. She thinks it's her fault and she needs Derek."

"Well?"

"I'll call him in the morning. Wake me up when you leave so I can call him before Mer gets up."

"Won't that be too early?"

"No he's a surgeon. Goodnight Michael. I love you." Nancy said as Michael turned out the light and they both turned to spoon before falling asleep.

_So that was was chapter 17...things didn't go the way I initially planned but once I started writing I just went with it so let me know what you think. Thank-you again to all of you who review and I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas!_


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Derek walked downstairs after getting ready for work hoping to find Meredith. He entered the kitchen and found Izzie and Alex but no Meredith. "Good morning. Have you seen Meredith?"

Both looked to him not sure what to say. They then looked to the counter where Derek's keys were.

Derek turned to follow their eye sight and saw the paper. He took a step closer and then he saw his name. When he reached to grab the paper his figure went to the ring that was on top of the paper right next to his keys. When his figures picked it up he spoke. "No Meredith. Please, no." He then picked up the letter with his other hand and went back to the table. He took a seat and set the ring down as he unfolded the paper and began to read.

_Derek,_

_I know right now you are thinking I ran but I want you to know I didn't. I just need some time alone right now. I promised you to only go forward and I'm going to keep that promise but I need you to as well. I'm setting you free Derek. When I get back all my things will be out of your house. You need to move forward now and find someone who can give you everything you deserve. That someone is not me Derek. I know that's what you are thinking but it's not me, it can never be me. You deserve to be happy. You were born to be a daddy Derek and I can't give you that so I am letting you go. You need to find someone who can give that to you so you can be happy. Thank-you for everything you have helped me with over the years and I hope that we can be friends. It seems that is all we were meant to be. This isn't goodbye more of a see you later because I will be back but you and I…my name is meant to stay Meredith Grey._

_Love always,_

_Mer_

Derek folded up the paper and grabbed her engagement ring before looking up at Izzie and Alex. "She left."

"We know. She left us a note asking us to move all her stuff back in here." Izzie said as her and Alex sat down across from Derek.

"I'm not letting you into our house."

"Relax man, we have a key and…"

"You have a key?"

"It's for emergencies." Izzie answered.

"I'm still not…"

"Don't worry Derek I'm pretty sure we all work the next few days and I'm almost positive we are all on call so we won't have time to do anything else." Alex said with a smile.

Derek wasn't sure what to say when Izzie spoke up. "She's hurting and being normal Meredith. Don't worry she will realize how crazy this idea is when she gets back and if she doesn't then she will have to hire someone to move her stuff."

"Thanks."

"No need to thank us. You and Mer are meant to be together we would be foolish to help her break that up. Now we have to get to work so we'll see you there right?"

Derek smiled for the first time that morning. "Right."

"Good. Come on Alex." Izzie said as she stood with Alex following behind. The two made their way out and headed to the hospital.

As soon as Derek heard the door close he heard his phone ring. He quickly picked it up without even looking to see who it was. "Hello, Dr. Derek Sheppard."

"Derek."

"Nancy?"

"Der, what's the single most important thing in your life?"

"Nancy, why are you whispering?"

"Just answer me. What's the single most important thing in your life?"

"Meredith." Derek replied not even having to think of an answer. When Nancy didn't say anything he spoke again. "Nancy are you still there?"

"Yeah Der…I'm still here. How are you?"

Derek sighed before he answered. "At the moment, not so good."

"What's going on Derek?"

"Meredith…she was pregnant but we lost the baby. She didn't take it very well."

"I'm so sorry Derek. How are you? I know how important kids are to you."

"I do want kids Nancy but only with Meredith and if it's not meant to be then I just want her. I'm not going to lie loosing the baby was tough but there's still a chance for us to be happy and if she would just talk to me she would know that we can be happy with or without a baby. I know we can Nancy."

"Oh Derek, I'm so sorry you guys are having to go through this."

"Thanks Nancy."

"What do you mean if she would just talk to you?"

"She left last night. I'm heading to the hospital so I'm hoping to find her there."

"Derek, you need to come to moms birthday party tomorrow."

"Nancy I already told you all that I can't come."

"YOU. NEED. TO. COME."

"Nancy please don't do this." Derek hated when his sisters put on the guilt trip.

"What's the single most important thing in your life Derek?"

"I already told you Nancy. It's Meredith."

"_Nancy, did Michael leave already?" Meredith asked coming into the room._

"Crap, I have to go Derek." Nancy quickly said when she heard Meredith. Then she saw Meredith enter her room and she held her hand up keep her quiet.

"Nancy was that Mer…is she there Nancy?"

"Okay, I'll see you tomorrow at moms party, don't be late and call if you need a ride or directions." Nancy quickly said before hanging up. She then turned her attention to Meredith. "Good morning Mer and yes Michael left already. He's going to be home for supper tonight. How are you feeling today?"

"Good morning to you too. I'm still a little sore but I feel a lot better."

"That's good. What do you want to do today?"

"Can we just relax and maybe rent some movie's?"

Nancy smiled. "We haven't done that since college. You still like the popcorn a little burnt?"

Meredith smiled. "Wouldn't have it any other way."

"Of course. I'll go rent the movies and when I get back I'll get back into my pajamas and get the popcorn ready."

"Thank-you Nancy. I really appreciate this."

"I know you do Mer. And you're welcome. I'll be back soon." Nancy said and then left the house.

"Nancy…Nancy was that Meredith?" Derek shouted back into the phone and then he heard the click. He replayed the conversation in his head and he had no doubt that Meredith was with Nancy. That was the only other place she could go to get away from him because he would have found her in Seattle. He quickly ran upstairs and through some stuff in a bag before making his way to the hospital.

Derek made it through his morning surgery and then ran into Mark on his way to the chief's office. "Hey Mark?"

"Don't hey me. I heard about Mer leaving. Did she really leave her ring?"

Derek took out the ring from his pocket and showed it to him. "She did but it will be back where it belongs soon enough." He finished with a smile.

"You know where she is?"

"She's with Nancy. I'm heading to the chief's to get a few days off now and I'm going to go to moms birthday party."

"When's your flight?"

"Three hours why?"

"Well Addi, Lilly, and I have a flight at 4pm. We are going to surprise mom."

"You didn't tell me."

"We knew Mer wasn't going to be able to get off so we didn't want to guilt you into going. I guess since Meredith's procedure the chief gave her some time off anyway."

"I'm assuming he did." Derek said as he stopped in front of the office door. "I hope he will give me some time as well. I'll come find you when I'm done."

Mark nodded as he walked away. Derek entered the office and after verifying with Richards secretary he made his way into the office.

Derek managed to get some time off and was able to get a ticket on the same flight as Mark, Addison, and Lilly.

Once they landed they made their way to a hotel deciding not to go to the house until morning. Once they got there Addison called Nancy to get details about the party and found out about Meredith. They planned how the next day would go since Derek was with them. After dinner everyone turned in however sleep didn't come easy for any of them because they were all worried about how the day would play out for Derek and Meredith.

"Mer let's go or we are going to be late." Nancy yelled up the stairs.

Meredith reluctantly made her way down the stairs and stopped in front of Nancy and Michael. "Nancy I really don't think this is a good idea. I should just stay in tonight."

"Nonsense. If mom finds out you are here and didn't even bother to visit her she will have a fit."

"This is a family thing, it would be better…"

"Meredith Grey you are coming so stop trying to come up with excuses to get out of it." Nancy said as she grabbed Meredith's coat and shoved it into Meredith's arms. "Michael will you help her with her coat?"

"Of course." Michael replied with a smile as he helped Meredith.

The phone rang and Nancy stepped into the kitchen to get it.

"She's still as bossy as ever I see." Meredith whispered.

Michael chuckled. "She is and it's very sexy."

Meredith giggled and without thinking she replied. "I love when Derek says the same thing to me after I tell him what to do." Once she finished she realized what she had said and she looked down.

"Meredith you still love him."

"I think I will always love him Michael but this is best."

"You didn't even give him a chance to tell you what he thinks."

"I know he wants kids and…this is better for everyone."

"You are miserable and I am pretty sure he is miserable as well, how is that better for everyone?"

"Because he needs to find someone who can give him what he wants."

"Meredith, I want kids and I know that Nancy wants kids, heck she's a Sheppard of course she wants kids. The point is if we couldn't have kids it wouldn't make me love her any less and I can't imagine not having her in my life. Relationships are hard and there are many hills to climb along the way but I don't ever want to wake up to an empty bed and think about the mistake I made pushing her away because we didn't talk about or face one of the hills. And life has hills as well but I couldn't even imagine my life without Nancy by my side because she makes the hills only seem like bumps . You need to think about the decision you are making while you still have a chance to fix this."

Meredith listened to Michael and the things he had said were starting to get to her. She looked up to him with tears in her eyes. "I love him Michael but I have so many issues that he has been dealing with since he has known me. They're not hills Michael…they're mountains and what if one day he wakes up and realizes there's too much baggage and it's just too much work?"

"Trust me Mer, I've seen the way he looks at you, there is no way he will ever feel that way."

"Let's go you two or we are going to be late." Nancy said coming back from the kitchen. She looked at the two and saw that Meredith looked upset. "Mer are you okay?"

"Yeah I think I am." Meredith smiled weakly. "Your husband here is pretty great."

Nancy smiled. "I tell myself that everyday Mer. Let's go." Nancy finished as she started out the door.

Meredith turned to Michael quickly and gave him a hug. "Thank-you."

"You're welcome, just think about what I said."

The three made it out to the car and took off towards Mrs. Sheppard's home.

"Derek you need to calm down." Mark said from the driver's seat as he looked over at Derek.

"I'm calm Mark, I just want to see Meredith."

"Derek you know she might not want to see you." Addison chimed in from the back seat next to Lilly.

"We have to fix this…tonight we are going to fix this." Was all Derek said the rest of the ride to his childhood home.

"Meredith dear, I'm so glad you could make it. I didn't even know you and Derek were in town." Mrs. Sheppard said as she hugged Meredith.

"Oh…Derek…he didn't make it…it's just me."

"Oh…" Mrs. Sheppard trailed off as she looked over Meredith's shoulder and saw Nancy give a shake of her head telling her to drop the subject. "Come on in you three. Kathryn is already here and we are just waiting on Anna. I have some tea and coffee in the dining room."

Mrs. Sheppard ushered everyone into the dining room and made sure that everyone had a drink while they all started conversations. After a few minute's Meredith snuck out of the room. She headed toward the patio and on her way had to go down a hall, which lead to the kitchen. On the wall's she stopped to look at all the family pictures. After looking at each picture, she made her way to the patio and sat on one of the lounge chairs. After laying back and making herself comfortable, she looked up at the stars and sighed as she replayed Michael's words over in her mind.

"This is my favorite spot of the house."

Meredith was pulled back from her thoughts as she looked over and watched Mrs. Sheppard take a seat at her feet. "I'm sorry I didn't hear you come out."

"I could tell you were thinking. So are you going to tell me why Derek isn't here and why you are not wearing the engagement ring right now?"

"I…"

"What did my son do?"

Tears came to Meredith's eyes. "He didn't do anything Elizabeth. It was me. I set him free. I want him to be happy."

"What? Meredith, he's happy with you."

Meredith shook her head. "I…I was pregnant…I lost the baby two days ago…I can't have children. Derek needs to be with someone who can give him children."

Mrs. Sheppard had a look of shock and then sympathy. She let Meredith's words sink in before pulling Meredith into a hug. She let Meredith cry as tears also rolled down her cheeks. Tears for her grandchild she would never see and tears for Meredith and Derek. "Meredith I'm so sorry dear."

After a minute or so Meredith tried to pull herself together and pulled away from Mrs. Sheppard. "I'm fine."

"You're not fine. Meredith…I'm so sorry about the baby but what is this about you not being able to have children."

Meredith looked away from her as she spoke. "I had a miscarriage after…Luke. This is the second baby I couldn't carry. I think it's safe to say I can't have children. Your son…he was born to be a father and he can't be that with me so he needs to find someone else."

"Meredith what is the first thing you think about in the morning when you wake up and the last thing you think about before you fall asleep?"

"Derek."

"You can't just push him away, those feelings won't go away."

"I'm not pushing. I'm letting him go. We can be friends."

"You don't really believe that do you?"

Meredith turned back to her with more tears and shook her head no. "It hurts to think…to know that I can't give him the one thing he wants so much. After everything he has done for me through these years. I owe him that."

"Meredith, I know my son and I know that the one thing he wants most is sitting right here. You need to talk to him."

"I don't want him to think he made a mistake."

"I know you have been alone most of your life Meredith but Derek isn't the type of guy who makes mistakes with his feelings. He thinks about every decision he makes before he makes it so he knows it's the right decision."

"Mrs. Sheppard I have too much baggage for Derek…it's too much for me to carry. I can't expect him to continue to be there."

"Derek is like his father Meredith." Mrs. Sheppard glanced over Meredith's shoulder and saw Derek coming toward them with a blanket. She looked back to Meredith, "He is strong and can handle it."

Meredith was about to reply when Mrs. Sheppard stood. Meredith knew before he stopped beside her that he was there.

Mrs. Sheppard hugged Derek. "I'm so sorry about the baby honey." After giving him a quick kiss on the check she took one more look at Meredith and made her way back into the house.

Derek took the blanket and wrapped it around Meredith. "It's a little chilly, I thought you could use this."

Meredith didn't meet his eyes as she replied. "Thanks."

Derek took the seat that his mom had just left. "So…you left."

"I left."

"We agreed forward only."

"I am moving forward Derek and you need to as well."

"You ran Meredith that's not going forward."

"I said I was coming back, I just needed some time. And you needed some time."

"How would you know what I needed? You were gone."

"It was best…this is best."

"Best? Best would have been having my fiancé with me while we grieved for our child. Best was not me waking up to an empty bed and finding a note telling me to move on."

"Derek…"

"No Meredith, you had your say now it's my turn. I love you…with everything I have I love you. You are the most important thing to me in this world Meredith…you. Yes I want children in our future but only with you. And if by some strange reason you can't have children than we can talk about our options but they will be our options not my options or your options, ours together. I know you are not use to having someone with you but I am here and no matter how hard you try to get rid of me you can't. Meredith…I am not going anywhere. I'm here to stay."

Meredith looked up with tears rolling down her cheeks. "I…too much…baggage…and hills…not hills…mountains…you don't deserve this Derek."

Derek put his hands on Meredith's face gently as he spoke causing her to look into his eyes. "I love you. I deserve you because I love you. As for the baggage, you've been through the airports Mer, we can get a luggage cart." Derek stopped as he saw the small smile and heard her soft giggle. "Now as for the hills and mountains I'm not quite sure what you meant by that but…well it doesn't matter because I love you."

"I love you too." Meredith replied before Derek kissed her.

When Derek pulled away he tried to dry her tears however they weren't stopping as she spoke again.

"I'm sorry I lost our baby Derek."

Derek tilted her chin up to him so they were again looking into each other's eyes. "This was not your fault Meredith. I don't know why but we were not meant to have this baby. And Meredith Addi told me there is no reason you can't have children in the future. But right now it's just going to be the two of us and I'm hoping that will be enough for you because it is enough for me. As long as I have you by my side that is all I need."

Looking into his eyes she knew. "You are all I need too Derek. I didn't realize it until now but it's true."

"Good then I think you should put this back where it belongs." Derek said as he gave her back her engagement ring.

Meredith immediately put it back on and threw herself into Derek's arms hugging him tightly, not wanting to let him go.

Derek and Meredith stayed outside talking for the next hour. They grieved over their lost child and they talked about their future together. Meredith also told Derek about her conversation with Michael. Derek looked up and saw his family watching them from the kitchen and decided it was time to go in. Looking back at Meredith he spoke again. "We better go in before they come out looking for us."

Meredith nodded and let Derek help her up. They started for the door when Meredith stopped them. "Derek wait."

"What is it Mer?"

"I don't want to wait."

"Okay let's get going, besides it is a little chilly out here."

"No Derek…us…I don't want to wait anymore. I want to be Mrs. Sheppard as soon as possible."

Derek had started to walk again however hearing Meredith he stopped quickly and turned around standing right in front of her. He placed his hands on her forearms and looked directly into her eyes. "What was that Meredith?"

"I…said…I…don't…want…to…wait…to…get…married. Was that slow enough for you?"

"You're serious?"

"I wouldn't joke about this Derek. I…if you don't want to we don't have to but I thought that you would want to after the last couple days I just realized that I don't want to be alone anymore and I know I'm not really alone now because I have you and all our friends but alone in the sense that I'm still a Grey and I was wrong in the letter I think I'm supposed to be Meredith Sheppard or Mrs. Sheppard or Mrs. Derek Sheppard but if you've changed your mind I would understand after what I did to you but…"

Derek stopped her ramble the only way he knew how. He leaned down and kissed her.

Meredith pulled back and looked into Derek's eyes. "Derek?"

Derek chuckled. "I want to Mer. I couldn't be happier to have you be Mrs. Sheppard. When Mer, when can I make you my wife?"

Meredith smiled. "Well if I had a choice I would say book a flight to Las Vegas but I know a few people that would be very upset if we did that and I would like to have a wedding. Probably not as big as Nancy and Addi's because of the short notice but defiantly a ceremony and reception. How long do you think it would take to plan?"

Derek had the biggest smile on his face now completely believing that she was telling the truth and really did want to get married. "Well Nancy and Addi started planning their weddings when they turned 16."

Meredith frowned at that. "I never thought about getting married before you."

"I'm glad to hear that." Derek smiled again and took a step closer to her. "I have a feeling that once we tell mom, Addi, and my sisters they will have the wedding planned within a week if possible. How soon would you like this to happen Mer?"

Meredith thought for a moment and then answered. "A month."

"A month?"

"That would give us some time to plan everything so we can make sure all the important people are there and I can get a dress and you can get your tux and we need a cake. Would that be enough time?"

"I think that Addi and the Sheppard's can plan a wedding in a month if this is really what you want Mer?"

"It is. I don't want to wait Derek."

"Okay than we are getting married in a month." Derek smiled.

"In a month and I'll be Mrs. Meredith Sheppard." Meredith smiled.

"I love the sound of that." Derek leaned down and kissed her again before picking her up and spinning her around.

Meredith hugged him tight while she giggled loudly at Derek's excitement and she couldn't help but be excited herself. "Okay Derek…please stop before I get sick."

Derek stopped spinning and put her back on her feet but still not letting her go. "I don't want to let you go, we should just stay out here all night long."

"As tempting as that is you yourself said we need to go back inside before they come out here and it's your mom's birthday we need to spend time with her."

"I guess you are right. Come on let's get you warm soon to be Mrs. Sheppard."

Meredith giggled again as they started walking again to the door. "We need to tell them."

"If I had the chance I would shout it from the roof."

"I love you Derek."

"I love you too Meredith." Derek said as he pulled the door open and the two of them entered the kitchen where they found Mark, Addison, and Elizabeth waiting for them.

"I'm glad you two finally came in. Is everything alright?" Elizabeth asked eyeing the two of them closely.

"We're good mom. Great even." Derek said still smiling.

"What's up with you two?" Mark asked.

"Mark." Addison said from beside him.

"You can't Mark me Addi. Look at his stupid grin something happened, he needs to tell us and look at Grey's…"

"Sheppard." Both Derek and Meredith said when they heard Mark say Grey.

All eyes went to the two as Mark finished. "Face matches his. Something happened."

"Derek?" Elizabeth asked.

"Should we tell them?" Derek asked Meredith.

"We should but let's tell everyone together maybe tomorrow. We don't want to ruin mom's birthday."

"Mom's?" Derek asked. "You just called my mom…mom."

"Well she already has been more of a mother to me than my own mother and besides it won't be much longer until she really is my mom right?" Meredith replied.

"Alright you two out with it." Elizabeth demanded.

"Mom we promise to tell you tomorrow. We don't want to ruin your birthday now let's go open your presents."

"Derek Michael Sheppard I want to know what has gotten into you two."

"You middle named me."

"I'll do a lot more if you don't tell me now."

"Okay, okay. Let's all go into the living room with everyone else so we only have to say it once."

Derek and Meredith followed Mark, Addison, and Elizabeth into the living room where they found his sisters and their families talking.

Once everyone took their seats Elizabeth spoke again. "Alright you two what's going on?"

"Go ahead Mer."

"We are going to get married."

"We already know that Meredith." Kathryn said from the couch.

"In a month." Derek replied with a huge smile as he put his arm around Meredith's shoulders.

"What was that?" Addison asked.

"We don't want to wait. We want to get married in one month and we would like you all to be there if possible." Meredith said as she tightened her arm around Derek's waist.

There was silence as everyone looked between the two and all eyes finally settled on Derek.

"It's true. We figured with all the women in this family you can help Mer plan it in a month. If I'm wrong we can just book tickets to Las Vegas for tomorrow."

Derek's last statement kick-started everyone again and caused everyone to jump up and approach the couple giving them congratulations and hugs.

Once everyone had settled down again Derek and Meredith asked Mark and Addison for a moment and they excused themselves to the kitchen. When they entered Derek spoke first.

"Mark…would you be my best man?"

Mark smiled and didn't even give it a second thought as he answered. "Yes. It's only fair that I pay you back for your services." He finished and gave Derek a hug.

Meredith and Addison smiled at the two before Meredith turned to Addison. "Addi…would you be my maid of honor?"

Addison was a little taken back as tears came to her eyes. "Oh Mer what about Christina or Izzie?"

"Christina is my person but she doesn't do weddings but I was going to ask her to be a bridesmaid and Izzie and I are close but you…you've helped me through a lot so it would mean a lot to me if you would." Meredith watched as more tears came to Addison's eyes. "If it's too much I can find…"

"No Meredith. I would be honored to be your Maid of honor."

"Really?"

"Really." Addison said as Meredith gave her a hug.

The four friends talked a little more before rejoining the rest of their family to watch Elizabeth open her presents.

On their way back to the hotel Meredith quickly pulled out her phone almost in a panic. "Crap."

Derek and Addison both looked at her as Derek spoke. "What?"

"I have to call Izzie and Alex to tell them not to move my things."

Derek chuckled. "Actually you don't besides they are probably sleeping right now since they both just got off a 24 hour shift."

"What do you mean I don't?"

"Izzie and Alex both knew you didn't really want your stuff moved so they didn't do it. Besides I wouldn't have let them into the house if they tried."

"They have a key."

"Right, we should talk about that."

"Mark and Addi have a key."

"Leave us out of this Grey." Mark said from the driver's seat.

"Sheppard." Again both Derek and Meredith said to Mark's use of her maiden name.

"Alright you three enough. If you wake Lilly no one will be sleeping tonight." Addison scolded as she looked at each of them.

"I need to get my stuff from Nancy's."

"Don't worry we can get it tomorrow on our way back to the airport. And you better call everyone and tell them our news."

"Okay. So do we have our own room?"

"We do. We got a suite and there is two rooms so we will have our privacy tonight."

"Good." Meredith replied and before long they were at the hotel.

Once they got to the suite everyone said goodnight before heading to their rooms.

Derek and Meredith spent the night in each other's arms, right where they belonged.

_So this is Chapter 18. I must say I am not 100 percent happy with it. There are parts I like and parts I don't. Please let me know what you think if you have time...I really appreciate everyones reviews and I hope everyone enjoyed their holiday!_


	19. Chapter 19

Disclaimer: I do not own Grey's Anatomy or it's characters.

Chapter 19

Before leaving New York Mark, Addison, Lilly, Derek, and Meredith went to Nancy's to get Meredith's things and to say goodbye. Derek pulled Michael aside and had a conversation about what he had said to Meredith the night before.

It had been a week since they returned from New York. Elizabeth and Nancy had arrived the night before and were staying with Derek and Meredith. Tonight Elizabeth and Nancy were making dinner for Derek, Meredith, Mark, Addison, Izzie, and Alex. They were all coming over to discuss wedding plans.

After dinner and with everything cleaned up the group made their way to the living room. Addison, Izzie, and Nancy had spoke over the phone and had started a list of things they needed to get done. Izzie had even bought a planner and she pulled it out as everyone settled down. Derek grabbed the phone and called Kathleen who had Anna at her house and he placed them on speaker phone so that they could be involved as well while George and Christina were on call at the hospital.

"Okay guys so the invitations went out last Tuesday. They were simple due to the time con straint but still elegant." Nancy said as she crossed invitations of the list.

"Good we already know the ceremony will be at the church and the reception will be here so we need to secure tables and chairs. What do you have in mind for food?" Elizabeth said as she looked to Derek and Meredith.

"I…we haven't talked about it." Meredith replied.

"Okay we can come back to that. Now we know that Addison, Nancy, Izzie, and Christina are bridesmaids. Derek I know Mark is your best man but what about groomsmen?"

"Alex, George, and Michael mom."

"That's good what about colors?" Kathleen said as everyone again looked between Derek and Meredith.

Meredith remained quiet as Derek answered. "We haven't decided yet."

"Well you need to decide so we can figure out decorations honey."

"I know mom we have talked about a couple choices and we will let you know once we decide." Derek spoke glancing at Meredith. Something didn't seem right about her tonight. She had been so happy however when his mom and Nancy got into town and were constantly asking questions about the wedding it was like she was shutting down.

"Remember we are going dress shopping tomorrow Mer." Addison spoke up and then looked to Derek and Mark. "Are you guys going to go get your tuxes?"

"Yeah we have an appointment at noon." Mark replied for Derek.

"Have you looked at any of the magazines I've given you yet Mer ? Do you have an idea of what you want for a dress?"

"Well…"

"What is it honey?" Elizabeth asked with a smile.

"You remember Izzie? You me and Christina were at my house and Carla had rented Coming to America."

"The train." Izzie smiled.

"What are you two talking about?" Nancy asked.

"Iz…" Alex said from beside her giving her a look.

"What Alex it would be gorgeous and Mer should get what she wants for her wedding."

"Izzie, you remember how this ended?"

"Oh right…" Izzie trailed off as she looked back to Meredith.

Meredith remembered as well and quickly brushed it off. "No…I haven't thought about a dress…maybe…no…I don't know."

"I think a train is a great idea Mer. Let's talk about flowers and you need to decide…band or DJ." Nancy smiled.

"Nancy's right Mer what kind of flowers do you want?" Addison asked.

Once Addison asked about flowers, Kathleen and Nancy started asking more questions. All of a sudden it was too much and she had to get out of that room. "I'm going to go check on Lilly. I'll be right back." Meredith said as she got up and started to leave.

Derek was right on her heals and stopped her before she could reach the steps. "Mer are you okay?"

"I'm fine Derek I just want to make sure she is okay."

"I don't believe you."

"Derek I promise I will be down before you know it." Meredith gave him a quick kiss as she started up the steps.

Derek went back to the living room and took his seat. "Alright you two. What happened?"

"You tell him."

"Oh no you don't Iz, you brought it up. Besides you were there I just heard about it after I begged my mom to bring me over with the ice cream."

"If it involved ice cream this has to do with her mother doesn't it?" Derek asked as he watched both Izzie and Alex nod in agreement. "Tell me."

"I don't remember how young we were but Mer's nanny let her have us over and she rented that movie for us. At the end when they got married the bride had this train that was so long. Mer thought it was so pretty. She said right away that when she got married her dress would have a train like that. After the movie Clara went to bed and we sat up playing dress up. Clara had let us use one of the huge drapes that she said needed to get washed." Izzie paused to giggle at the memory before continuing. "We somehow put it on Mer and she pretended to walk down the aisle with it. Mrs. Grey came home that night. She yelled at us for using the drape and sent us to bed. We started up the stairs when Mrs. Grey called Mer back to the living room. Christina and I stayed on the stairs to listen."

"What did you hear Izzie?" Derek asked not really wanting to know but needing to.

"She said it was childish to play dress up and I was stupid for thinking I would get married one day because no one would ever want me just like my father didn't want me since I was ordinary. She then spent about 5 minutes telling me how stupid I was for wanting a train that long because if by some chance I did find someone to marry it wasn't practical. Clara was fired the next day for encouraging me to play dress up and those drapes were destroyed." Meredith said as she walked back into the room and sat down.

Derek took her hand. "I'm sorry Mer. I want you to find the longest train you can find tomorrow."

"It's okay Derek, it doesn't matter."

Elizabeth felt her heart break a little more for Meredith as she listened. She hated seeing Meredith so sad and decided she wanted her to be happy again so she changed the topic. "What about a cake? What kind of cake do you want?"

"We…we haven't decided."

"What about flower girls? Do you want flower girls Meredith?" Anna asked

Meredith again couldn't answer. She looked at everyone sitting there watching her and Derek and decided she had made a mistake. "I…Derek…I was wrong this isn't what I want…I changed my mind."

Derek froze when he heard her. "No Mer. You want this. We are getting married in 3 weeks and I know this is a lot but I'm here to help you."

"No Derek I mean yes. Yes we are getting married but I don't want a wedding. Why don't we just go to the court house?"

"Oh.." Derek sighed relieved that she did still want to get married. "I thought you wanted a wedding?"

"No I was wrong, I don't want a wedding. I'm sorry." Meredith said as she looked from Derek to all her friends.

"Meredith Grey don't you dare lie to him." Alex scolded from across the table.

"I'm not. We can just go to the courthouse. It will be easier and cheaper. This is good."

"Mer just because you haven't thought about it…"

"Alex."

"Either you spill or I will."

"You don't have a right to say anything and I've made up my mind…courthouse."

"What is he talking about Mer?" Derek asked concerned.

"She doesn't know what she wants." Alex said quickly.

"Mer…forward only."

"Fine…I'm sorry Derek I don't know what I want. I've been thinking about this all week since I asked Izzie and Christina to be bridesmaids and I just don't know what I want. I've tried to get answers to all these questions but nothing comes to mind. I just don't think I'm suppose to have a wedding."

"Mer…"

"I'm sorry. I believed my mom. I believed her and I never thought about my wedding because I believed I would be alone. I remember Iz talking about her dream wedding. She has everything planned and I can't even come up with colors."

"It will come Mer. We just need to actually make some decisions instead of throwing out ideas all the time."

"Derek's right Mer, you already know about the dress. Just take it one thing at a time." Addison threw in.

Meredith stayed silent.

"Meredith, just because you didn't dream about a wedding growing up doesn't mean that you can't dream now. And you do have us to help you." Elizabeth said as she looked sympathetically to Meredith.

Meredith thought about what she said and then remembered Nancy and Addison's weddings. She remembered the feeling of wanting what they had. It hadn't been a strong pull on her but seeing how beautiful everything had turned out she did want it. She smiled as she looked back up and around the table. "I want a train, a long train."

"Then we will make sure you get one." Elizabeth smiled back. She looked at Derek who gave a quick nod.

"Okay then, what's next?" Meredith asked feeling excited again.

"Back to colors." Addison said.

"Addison's right. We can't decide on much else without knowing what colors. You said that you have talked about them. What colors have you talked about?"

"Mom…" Derek started as he turned to look at Meredith who had put her hand on his thigh.

"Mom's right Derek. We have to know what colors you want." Nancy said cutting Derek's protest off.

Meredith smiled looking into Derek's eyes. "That's it."

"What's it?" Derek asked.

"Our colors. Silver and blue."

"This is great Mer, you're finally deciding on colors but blue…what color blue?"

"Derek's eyes."

"Oh sky blue, that's a wonderful choice Meredith." Elizabeth said happily.

"No not sky blue." Derek said as he looked to his mother.

"Than what color blue?" Addison asked.

"The color his eyes get when he looks at me…when we…it's a darker blue but not navy more of a royal blue but a little deeper maybe…you've seen it…when he looks at me…" Meredith trailed off not really wanting to say anymore in front of Elizabeth and Derek's sisters.

Mark caught on right away and started laughing. "You have got to be kidding me. Out of all the colors in the world and you choose that one." Mark continued to laugh. "Why didn't you at least think of a different way to explain it?"

"Mark, stop it."

Mark however couldn't stop laughing. "I'm…sorry…mom…it's just…too funny."

"Mark come on. Stop it." Addison scolded.

Mark quickly settled down seeing Addison's serious look. "I'm sorry Addi." He mumbled under his breath.

"Okay Meredith we need to see this color you are talking about so that we can match it up." Kathleen said over the phone.

"But I have only seen it in Derek's eyes and…" Meredith paused for a moment. She saw Derek was still looking across the table so she decided to try and get them to see it. She saw that Nancy, Elizabeth, and Addison were all looking at her now so she nodded her head slightly and turned her attention to Derek signaling them to look to Derek. She slowly moved her hand up on his thigh and squeezed a little. She noticed Derek shift slightly and she knew she had accomplished what she wanted so she turned her attention back to the three women across from her and with a smile she asked. "Did you see it?"

"I've never seen his eyes turn that color and I've known him his whole life." Elizabeth said in shock.

"It is a beautiful blue and I think it is perfect." Addison said.

"How did you get his eyes to change like that Mer?" Nancy asked as Mark burst out laughing again.

"You don't…you don't want to know Nancy." Mark replied.

"I think we all want to know now." Anna said loudly to break through Mark's laughter.

Mark settled himself down as everyone looked to Meredith and Derek. Mark being Mark jumped at the opportunity to embarrass his friends. "It's the look he gets when he wants Grey naked."

There was now complete silence while Meredith and Derek were turning red of embarrassment.

Once the initial shock whore off Elizabeth was the first to speak. "I think we should look at different swatches of color tomorrow while we are at the dress store so that we have a sample of the blue you chose."

Nancy perked up next with a smile. "Good idea mom. We can't go to the florist and say 'do you have any flowers that are the color of Derek wants Grey naked?'"

"I don't know Nancy, isn't there something called lust." Addison spoke up just before the entire room broke out into laughter.

Once everyone settled down they heard Lilly crying.

"She probably just needs her diaper changed, I'll be right back." Addison said as she stood.

"No Addi, let me get her please."

"Okay Mer go ahead. There's a bottle on the table it should help her get back to sleep after you change her and call if you need anything else."

Meredith nodded before she got up and left.

Once she was out of the room Derek looked seriously at everyone in the room and then focused on the women. "She will get whatever she wants for our wedding."

"Of course Derek."

"I'm serious Addison. Whatever she wants you are all to make sure she gets it…money is not an option here. She does deserve her dream wedding and I want her to realize that and get it."

Everyone nodded in understanding before Meredith came back.

"Okay so your colors are royal blue and silver." Nancy said as she crossed colors off the list.

"Wine."

"You don't have any more Grey. You said we drank it all at dinner."

Meredith chuckled. "Not that wine Mark. The color wine or burgundy. Royal blue, wine/burgundy, and silver for our colors."

"It's a good thing Yang's not here since there's no alcohol."

"I don't know Sloan, once she finds out about the colors I think she will be a little disappointed that she missed this." Alex smiled as he again looked at Derek and Meredith who were blushing again.

"Enough of that now. Okay so colors are set. What's next?" Elizabeth asked smiling at Derek and Meredith.

The next day Meredith, Addison, Izzie, Christina, Nancy, and Elizabeth went dress shopping while Derek, Mark, Alex, and George went to rent their tuxes.

By the end of the day they all were exhausted. Meredith, Nancy, and Elizabeth returned home and found Derek preparing dinner.

"Hey." Meredith said happily as she walked into the kitchen.

"Hey, did you find a dress?" Derek smiled as he turned from the stove and pulled her in for a hug.

"I did and everyone else found their dresses as well. I never knew picking out a dress was so tiring." Meredith finished as she plopped down in a chair next to Nancy while Elizabeth had gone to the stove to see what Derek was cooking.

"We had to find the perfect one Mer, it wasn't going to be just an hour trip or something." Nancy sighed from beside Meredith.

"Nancy the second one was just fine and the fifth one would have worked too."

"Mer the second one didn't have a train and the fifth one was not the right one trust me."

"Mom can you help me out here? I know you liked the tenth one I tried on."

"I did dear but Nancy's right they were not perfect. The last one…It's perfect."

"The last one. How many did you have to try on Mer?"

"The whole store."

Derek, Nancy and Elizabeth all chuckled at Meredith's reply knowing it wasn't true.

"Don't laugh at me. I'm going to have nightmares of trying on dresses for the rest of my life."

"A little dramatic Mer. Besides once you walk down that isle it will be worth it and trust me Derek is going to love the dress just like I know you do."

"You may be right Nancy but it still doesn't change the fact that I am never dress shopping with you again."

"That's good because I only plan on marrying you once." Derek said as he gave her a kiss.

"I'm only planning on marrying you once too. Did you guys all get your tuxes?"

"We did and we called Michael who had already given his measurements. Once we were done we all went golfing."

"So you didn't have to try on the whole store?"

"Oh stop that Mer you did not try on the whole store. What's for dinner Derek?"

"Pasta." Derek answered with a smile as he helped his mom finish up dinner.

The next week was filled with finishing the details of the wedding. Surprisingly Meredith did not get nervous as the wedding got closer. Anna, Kathleen, and the rest of the Sheppard's were set to arrive at the end of the week for the final preparations.

With two weeks left Meredith, Derek, Nancy, and Elizabeth went to order a cake. They entered the cake shop and were quickly ushered to a table as samples were brought out. Addison arrived shortly after the others had and they all started sampling the cakes.

Meredith was distracted as she watched the women who owned the shop. For some reason she felt like she knew her however she didn't remember meeting her. After trying every sample the group had narrowed the choices down to three and were discussing which would be the best. The owner of the shop had brought out more samples of their top choices and they were again eating and discussing the three choices.

Nancy was talking as Meredith went to take another bite of Nancy's favorite when Meredith heard the chime on the door. She looked up and dropped her fork as she saw who had entered the shop and in that moment she remembered how she knew this woman.

"Mer?" Derek quickly asked after seeing Meredith drop her fork. She didn't answer so he quickly turned his head in the direction Meredith was looking. He saw the shop owner pulling out of a hug and she quickly kissed a man who had walked through the door. Derek looked at the man closer and turned back to Meredith as he grabbed her hand. "It's okay Mer, I'm here."

Elizabeth noticed the change and went to ask what was wrong however before she could speak she heard someone else speak.

"I'm so sorry I left like that. Have you decided which cake you would like?"

To everyone's surprise Meredith who hadn't said much since arriving stood and answered. "Yes Mrs. Grey. We have decided on the butter cream. Do you have designs you can show us?"

"Of course dear. That is a great choice and I will be right back with my book. If you will excuse me."

Meredith watched her walk to the back and she turned to see the man starring at her. Derek noticed as well and stood next to Meredith. "Mer we can find someone else to do our cake."

Addison, Nancy, and Elizabeth looked on not knowing what had happened. They heard Meredith say the women's name but they were still unsure of what was happening.

Meredith was about to respond to Derek when the man approached her, she quickly grabbed Derek's hand.

"Meri, it's good to see you."

"It's Meredith."

"You're getting married I see. Congratulations." The man said and then turned his attention to Derek and held out his hand. "You must be the lucky groom. Congratulations."

"Thank-you Mr. Grey."

"You know who I am?"

"Meredith told me when we saw you at Ellis's funeral although I had forgot that Susan was there as well."

"Yes we wanted to pay our respects and to make sure Meredith was okay. Ellis was a tough woman."

"I see you all are talking, that is wonderful. Meredith dear if it's alright with you I was hoping we could get together for dinner or something just to get reacquainted?"

Everyone looked to Meredith trying to gage her reaction. Derek placed his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. He quickly whispered into her ear. "You don't have to Mer. Whatever you want I'm here."

Meredith nodded to Derek and then turned back to her father. "I think…Maybe…Dinner. Dinner at our house maybe Friday?"

"That sounds great sweetheart." Susan responded.

"Mom, Nancy, and Derek will be there with us. Mom and Nancy are here for the wedding and are staying with us so they will be there as well."

"Okay." Thatcher said as he looked to his wife.

"That sounds nice. Do you need us to bring anything?"

"You don't need to bring anything. We will take care of everything." Derek replied.

Susan noticed how her husband was fidgeting and saw how nervous Meredith looked. "Okay now that that is settled how about we get the details of your cake figured out?"

"That sounds like a good idea." Derek said as he helped Meredith sit back down and he took his seat.

Susan turned to Thatcher and gave him a quick kiss before he left. Once he was gone the group went back to work finishing the details of the cake.

Friday came quickly. Elizabeth had cooked while Derek and Meredith were at the hospital and shortly after they returned home Susan and Thatcher arrived.

Dinner went smoothly and to Meredith's surprise she found herself enjoying herself. However, she was extremely happy that Elizabeth, Nancy, and Derek were with her.

After desert everyone was sitting around the table talking. Elizabeth had brought up her grandkids which caused Susan and Thatcher to talk about their newest granddaughter. Thatcher started talking about a picture that he remembered while Susan tried to stop him. However he continued and soon Meredith interrupted him.

"That was me. The wagon by the tree it was me."

Susan looked towards Meredith with sympathy. Derek, Nanny, and Elizabeth also looked to Meredith.

"Oh I guess I forgot. Molly must have had a picture similar to that. It's okay, I'll look for it when we get home Susan and I'll show it to you." Thatcher said looking at Meredith.

"It's not okay."

"Mer honey." Derek tried to calm her.

"No Derek, it's not okay." Meredith said looking at Derek before turning back to Susan and Thatcher. "I thought I could do this…I thought I wanted this but…Thatcher…You never fought for me or even tried to see me. You have a family and you don't need me. I think… if it wasn't for Susan you wouldn't even be here right now. If you are looking for forgiveness for leaving me…you have it. You did what you needed to do at that time and you have to live with that. I have my own family now. I'm sorry Susan. You're a nice person and I'm sure you are a great mother but the truth is you are not my mother and I don't need another. I'd…maybe we can be friends. It looks like we are all done now so I'm going to go ahead and clean up." Meredith finished and after taking a breath and not hearing anyone speak she grabbed her and Derek's plates and headed to the kitchen.

There was silence after Meredith left. She had said what she needed to and left. Derek looked to his mother before turning back to Thatcher and Susan.

"I didn't mean to hurt her." Thatcher replied.

"You left her when she was 5." Derek replied.

"She had her mother and…"

"You lived with that women for how many years before Meredith. You can't tell me you didn't know what she was like."

"Derek." Elizabeth chided.

"I think we should leave honey." Susan whispered from beside Thatcher. The two of them stood and started for the door.

Derek followed them out as Nancy and Elizabeth took the rest of the dishes to the kitchen where they found Meredith.

Susan turned to Derek at the door. "Is she okay…is she really okay?"

"It's taken a while but I think she really is Susan. Mer's guarded and it takes a lot to get close to her but once you do she never forgets and she gives her heart."

"I didn't want to hurt her I just thought…I'm really sorry about tonight."

"It will be okay, just don't force anything. Mer doesn't like to be backed into a corner and maybe this tonight is an opening. She wouldn't have agreed if she didn't have some feelings."

"Thank-you Derek and please thank Meredith." Susan said her goodbyes and left.

"Meredith honey are you okay?" Elizabeth asked as she set some dishes in the sink and stood next to Meredith.

"I'm fine mom. I'm just going to finish cleaning up and head to bed."

Elizabeth looked back to Nancy and looked back to Meredith. She put one arm around Meredith's shoulders and her other hand she took to stop Meredith's movements of rinsing dishes. "Honey you can't lie to me. Come over here and sit for a minute." Elizabeth led Meredith to the bar and helped her take a seat as she took one next to Meredith. "Good now how are you really?"

Meredith took a deep breath before she answered. "I feel like I should be mad. I mean he didn't even know that it was me in the picture. I guess I was holding on to the idea that he missed me, that he loved me but for him not to even remember me…the weird part of all this is the fact that it doesn't hurt like I thought it would. Maybe it's because I don't know what I missed."

"What do you mean Mer?" Nancy asked from the other side of the counter.

"I mean, since I never had a dad I don't know what I missed, I don't know what it is like to have a dad. I remember thinking that a dad was someone who would hold me after my bad dreams, love me when mom couldn't, scare my boyfriends when they would come pick me up for a date, and at one time I wanted my dad to walk me down the aisle when I married the man I love. Those thoughts went away the older I got and realized I didn't have a dad. Am I a bad a person for not being mad or hurt?"

"Of course not Meredith. You deserve to be happy and you are deciding what is making you happy. Don't ever feel bad for that Meredith." Elizabeth answered as she pulled Meredith in for a hug.

"Hey what's going on in here?" Derek asked from the doorway.

Meredith and Elizabeth broke apart and the four went about finishing the dishes and cleaning up.

The next two weeks went by quickly. The rest of Derek's family made it and it was soon the day of the wedding.

Meredith was standing in front of the mirror in the bridal suite. She had her dress on and was looking at her reflection.

"You look beautiful."

Meredith turned slightly to see Elizabeth had entered the room. "Thank-you."

Elizabeth motioned to Addison, Nancy, Izzie, and Christina silently asking them to leave the room. Once the four were out of the room Elizabeth made her way to Meredith. "I have something for you."

"Oh…"

Elizabeth handed her a small box. "Michael gave these to me for our sixth wedding anniversary when I found out I was pregnant with Derek and I want to give them to you."

Meredith opened the box and saw the beautiful teardrop diamond earrings. "I can't take these mom."

"Nonsense. Michael gave me many pieces of jewelry through our years together and he always told me when I got tired of them I should give them to my children. I'm not tired of them but I am too old to wear them now. Besides I know they will go wonderfully with your dress."

"You should give them to Nancy or Kathleen or…"

"I am giving them to the daughter I want to give them too. Now hush and put them on, it's almost time. Are you nervous?"

Meredith put the earrings on as she answered. "I'm not nervous. I'm excited. I get to officially become Mrs. Doctor Derek Sheppard. I feel like I've been waiting forever for this."

Elizabeth watched the smile on Meredith's face and smiled herself. She saw the smile falter for a moment and knew what she was thinking about. "She would be proud of you Meredith."

"Who?"

"Your mother. She would be proud of you."

"You don't have to say that. My mother was only ever proud of her surgeries."

"Well, I'm proud of you."

Meredith stopped fussing with her hair and turned to fully face Elizabeth. "What?"

"You heard me, I am proud of you."

"Why?"

"Well besides the fact that my son completely adores you. You have not had an easy life Meredith and despite everything that has been thrown at you, you have pushed through. You have become an adult."

"You're proud of me?"

"Yes."

Meredith had tears in her eyes and didn't know what to say.

Elizabeth saw the emotion in Meredith's eyes and knew what she was thinking. "No one has ever said that before have they?" Elizabeth watched Meredith shake her head. "Well now you have. You have brought joy to our family and I am glad that you have chosen to be a part of us forever. You get your happily ever after just like Michael and I did."

"Thank-you mom." Was all Meredith could say as she hugged Elizabeth.

They were interrupted by a knock on the door along with some loud whispers. After a couple seconds the door opened and Mark popped his head in. "I hate to break this up but…wow you look amazing Mer."

"She does and why are you here Mark?"

"Oh sorry mom, it's almost time and Derek wanted me to give Mer something since he knew her guards wouldn't let him pass."

Meredith giggled as he made his way into the room. Elizabeth gave her one more hug and a quick kiss on the cheek before making her way out of the room.

"Derek wanted to thank-you for his watch and to give you this." Mark leaned in to give her a hug.

"That's it?"

"Well I told him I would give you a kiss too but he said he would make sure I needed stitches so I guess I have to give you this instead." Mark finished and handed her a box.

Meredith slowly opened the box to reveal a diamond necklace. "Oh wow it's beautiful."

Mark smiled. "Not as beautiful as you."

Meredith looked at Mark with her eyebrow raised.

"He told me to say that."

Meredith smiled. "Would you mind?"

"Of course not." Mark responded as he helped put it on her. "Are you happy?"

Meredith turned around to look Mark in the eyes. "I've never been happier Mark."

"Good. You know he said from the moment he met you in that hospital room all those years ago that he would marry you?"

"He told me and something about faith."

Mark chuckled. "You are perfect for him Mer, you make him happy."

"Thank-you Mark."

"For what?"

"For not talking him out of loving me, for believing him when he talked about faith, and for not pushing me away when I needed you guys."

"You grew on me Grey. Besides when have you ever known Derek to let anyone talk him out of anything?"

"Well…"

"Using sex to get what you want does not count."

Meredith giggled again and Mark joined in.

"I love you Mer and I'm glad you let us all in and are now officially going to be a Sheppard. Their pretty great."

"Yeah, yeah they are pretty great. And I love you too Mark." Meredith responded as she gave him a hug.

There was another knock on the door as Addison stuck her head in. "It's time Mer and Mark if you made her make-up run you will be sleeping on the couch."

Meredith giggled at Mark's shocked expression. "Addi why would you think it was me? I'm not the one who gave her that necklace around her neck."

Addison ignored him as she pushed into the room and walked up to Meredith admiring the necklace and earrings. "They are beautiful."

"Thank-you. The earrings are from mom and the necklace is from Derek."

Nancy, Izzie, and Christina had now entered the room.

"Good so that covers something old and something new. We still need something borrowed and something blue." Izzie said happily.

"Well I have something borrowed." Nancy said as she stepped up to Meredith and handed her a bracelet. "My father gave this to mom on their eighth anniversary and it was when she told him she was pregnant with me."

Meredith looked at the bracelet and realized that it matched the earrings and was very close to the necklace. "How did you?"

"Mom has given each of us the jewelry that dad gave her when they found out about us on our wedding days. Derek knew about the earrings and once mom confirmed he had your necklace made. I know my brother and eventually you will have your own bracelet but for now you can borrow this one."

Meredith nodded as she watched Nancy put it on her.

"Okay enough of the sappiness. Barbie and I got the something blue." Christina stepped forward and handed Meredith a long box.

Meredith opened it and giggled.

"You need a garter and it's hidden under your dress so no one will now the color until the reception." Izzie answered proudly.

"With that I will take my leave ladies." Mark said however he wasn't heard over the giggles and he slipped out of the room.

Addison took the garter and helped Meredith put it on.

"Did you give it to her?"

"I did."

"How is she?"

"She wants to run."

"What?"

"Mark!"

"Sorry mom. She's happy Derek. The girls are finishing their little tradition and then I think it's time to go."

"What no lame attempts to get me to change my mind?"

"She's it for you Derek. I know it and I love her. For some strange reason you make her happy, you both deserve that."

"I'm impressed that was pretty big of you."

"Yeah well if you hurt her…"

"I know. I still can't believe that all of my family has threatened me. You are all suppose to be on my side."

"We are but she is our family too."

"I'm glad. You know Mark there was a time when I didn't think this day would happen."

"She found your light Derek, it just took her longer than some woman."

Derek looked at Mark and the too started laughing.

"What are you two laughing about?"

"Nothing mom. We were just talking about something that happened a few years ago." Mark said.

"Well you two better get it together. It's time to start." Elizabeth said as she watched her two sons straighten themselves out.

Michael, Alex, and George were in the hall waiting as Elizabeth, Mark, and Derek made their way out of the room and headed to the chapel.

Derek and Mark walked Elizabeth to her seat with Michael, Alex, and George following behind. The all took their spots next to the minister.

The door opened and Christina made her way down the aisle. Once she was in her spot the door opened again and Izzie entered. The door opened again and Nancy made her way down the aisle. Once Nancy was in her spot Addison gave a small push to Derek's niece and nephew who were the flower girl and ring bearer. They made their way slowly down the aisle and took their seats next to Elizabeth.

"Are you nervous about your vows?"

"I just don't want Derek to be mad. We never talked about it and well…"

"Don't worry Mer, he will love it." Just then Addison noticed it was her turn to make it down the aisle. "Are you ready?"

"I've never been more ready."

"Good, I'll see you in a second and you do look gorgeous Mer."

"Thank-you Addi." Meredith said as Addison took her first step into the chapel and made her way down the aisle.

Meredith heard the music change and knew it was her turn. She stepped up in front of the door and took a deep breath as the ushers opened the doors. She took another breath before she started down the aisle. After about 3 steps she caught Derek's eyes and she never lost them the rest of the way down the aisle.

Derek watched as their friends came in with a huge smile on his face however once he caught site of Meredith his breath caught in his throat.

Mark chuckled as he noticed his friends breathing change. He leaned in and whispered. "Deep breath in and let it out. If you pass out Mer will kill you and I know some other women that will help her. Besides I already told you she was beautiful."

Derek did as he was told and if he wasn't so caught up in Meredith he would have hit his best friend.

Meredith took her spot next to Derek and they joined hands, each of them mouthed 'I Love You' to each other as the minister started.

Derek and Meredith had decided on traditional vows. Derek had just finished his when the minister turned to Meredith and nodded.

Meredith looked Derek in the eyes as she started. "I love you Derek more than I thought was possible." Meredith paused for a brief moment and saw Derek's confused expression. "Derek, you stood by me through the darkest part of my life and you were still there when the dust settled with the luggage cart." Meredith paused again as she turned her head and smiled at Elizabeth before quickly focusing back on Derek. "You have stood by me when I needed you most and never faltered when I pushed you away because I was too stubborn to know that I needed you. You are strong, caring, loving, stubborn, and you make me feel safe. You have taught me how to love and you have given me a family which I didn't know I wanted. You always know what I need and want. And you have made the mountains into bumps." Meredith paused again as she looked over Derek's shoulder to see the smile on Michaels face. "Thank-you for loving me Derek and for showing me how much better my life is with you next to me. You make me happy and it's because of you Derek that I'm a better person. I love you Derek and I promise to love you forever." Meredith finished as she saw the tears in Derek's eyes that matched the tears that were falling down from her eyes. She quickly nodded to the minister to continue.

As the minister announced, "you may kiss your bride." Derek quickly pulled Meredith to him.

After what felt like forever Mark leaned in to the two who were still kissing. "Mom's giving us the look and the natives are getting restless you two." Mark said as he looked back to Elizabeth. When he noticed they still hadn't stopped he turned his attention to them and tried again. "The quicker you break it up the quicker you will get to the honeymoon." Mark smiled as the two slowly broke apart.

As the minister announced the two they made their way out. Addison and Mark followed next. Nancy and Michael followed. Izzie and Alex came next and Christina and George were the last of the wedding party.

Derek quickly pulled Meredith to the side before their guests started to make their way out of the chapel. "Why didn't you tell me you were going to do that?"

"I wanted it to be a surprise. Everyone knows how you feel about me and I wanted to let everyone know how I feel about you. Are you mad?"

"No. That…what you said Mer, it made me fall in love with you even more. Did anyone else know you had planned that?"

"Only Addi. Nancy can't keep a secret and I knew Addi wouldn't tell Mark since he can't keep a secret either."

"I resent that Grey. I can keep a secret." Mark said as he pulled Meredith into a hug.

"It's not Grey anymore Mark."

"Whatever. You did good even though secrets are not very nice."

"Oh leave her alone Mark. Congratulations you guys that was beautiful." Addison said as she gave the two newlyweds hugs.

The rest of their friends gave them hugs as their other guests started making their way out of the chapel.

Once the chapel was empty everyone made their way to Derek and Meredith's house for the reception. The rest of the night was spent celebrating the union of the two Sheppard's.

Late into the morning, Derek and Meredith's family stood in the driveway waiting for the couple to come out.

Derek and Meredith had made their way into the house and quickly changed before making their way back out to their family.

"You two enjoy yourselves and don't worry about anything here." Elizabeth stepped forward and hugged the two.

"Thanks mom for everything."

"You're welcome Meredith."

Derek and Meredith said goodbye to everyone before getting into the limo and heading to the airport.

"Where are we going Mr. Sheppard."

"You will find out soon enough Mrs. Sheppard."

"Come on, you can tell me."

"It's a surprise."

"I hate surprises."

"No you don't."

"I do and besides we are married now no secrets remember."

"We are and this isn't a secret because you know we are going somewhere."

"Derek."

"Meredith. You are so cute when you pout."

"You are going to be very lonely tonight."

"You wouldn't."

"I would if you don't tell me." Meredith responded as she straddled him.

Derek smiled. "Jamaica...private beach…all to ourselves." Derek responded between kisses

"Really?"

"Really. Now are you done torturing me?"

"I guess, it's not nice to torture my husband now is it?"

"No it's not." Derek finished as he claimed her lips as the two made good use of the ride to the airport.

_I am so sorry this took so long. Honestly the only reason I have is because for some reason 3 other story ideas came to mind and I couldn't get them out of my mind until I wrote down the outlines. Once that was done I was able to finish this chapter. I am thinking 2 more chapters left of this story but we will see what comes out. If you have time I would love to hear what you think if you are still reading...again I am really sorry this took so long and I hope you enjoyed!_


	20. Chapter 20

"Mom!"

"Where's Meredith?" Elizabeth asked as she looked around Mark and did not see her daughter-in-law.

"It's nice to see you too mom." Mark tried to act hurt.

"Oh don't be a baby. Where is she? She said she was going to pick me up."

"Mer called this morning and asked if I could come get you. She said she still had to do a few things to get the house ready. I'm suppose to take you to their house and then we are going to meet Derek and Addi for dinner tonight."

"Don't be silly, I will be cooking dinner tonight. Let's go stop by the store on the way and you can call Derek and Addison to let them know of the change in plans."

"Why do I have to call them?"

"Because you have the phone and I need to pick up the food. Now quit complaining and lets go so I can see my granddaughter and have dinner ready on time. And Mark it's good to see you too."

Elizabeth and Mark quickly collected Elizabeth's suitcases and they made their way to the car.

Mark drove to the grocery store and helped Elizabeth get the food she wanted. When they were back in the car heading home he decided to call Derek. He picked up his phone and pressed the speed dial before putting the phone to his ear.

"Are you at the house, where's Mer?"

"Calm down. What is it with you Sheppard's? None of you ever say hello." Mark asked as he looked at Elizabeth quickly.

"I'm not in the mood Mark. Are you at the house yet?"

"No we are about half way there. Mom decided she wanted to make dinner tonight so we stopped at the grocery store and now we are heading to the house. Can you let Addi know?"

"Have you spoke to Mer?"

"Not since she called me to ask me to pick up mom."

"Damn it."

"What is it Derek?"

"She's not answering the phone. I've been calling her for the last 30 minutes since I got out of surgery. I told her I would call and she's not answering."

"Maybe she's in the shower."

"For 30 minutes?"

"Maybe she's trying to relax. You know she hates it when you worry so much."

"I know but she wasn't feeling well when I left this morning and I told her I didn't want to leave her."

"I'm sure she is fine."

"I know Mark but she's not answering. Crap." Derek replied as he looked down at his pager.

"Don't worry we are almost there. I will have her call you as long as you let Addi know we are having dinner here tonight."

"Okay, I have to go…don't forget to have her call me."

"I won't." Mark finished and closed his phone.

"What is he worried about now?"

"He said she wasn't feeling well this morning and now she isn't answering the phone."

Elizabeth studied Mark's facial expression for a minute before she spoke. "Are you worried Mark?"

"Derek knows Mer better than anyone and when he worries…there usually is something wrong."

"Then you better step on it."

Mark didn't hesitate as he pushed a little harder on the gas pedal.

Within minutes Mark was driving down the driveway to the Sheppard house. He saw Meredith's car in the driveway but everything else looked normal.

Once he parked the car he helped Elizabeth out of the car and while she went to the front door Mark grabbed her suitcases.

Elizabeth rang the doorbell and waited. When she didn't hear any movement in the house she rang it again and knocked on the door. Again there was no sign that anyone was in the house so she rang it again as Mark joined her at the door.

"Hasn't she come yet?"

"No and I've rang the bell three times now."

Mark stepped up to the door and pounded quickly now really starting to worry. "Mer, Mer open the door." When he didn't hear anything he got more worried. "Meredith damn it open this door now."

Elizabeth was starting to worry. "Mark don't you have a key?"

"I know the code to get in through the garage. Give me a minute mom." Mark finished as he rushed to the garage door.

Elizabeth followed behind him and watched as he entered the code and the door opened. Mark quickly went in and made his way to the door that led to the kitchen. This door was unlocked and they both entered the house. "Mark check the living room and dining room, I'll go upstairs."

Mark quickly went in the direction he had been told while Elizabeth climbed the steps. She searched each of the rooms and found nothing until she entered the bedroom. She found Meredith on the floor. Elizabeth quickly made her way to Meredith and knelt down next to her. "Meredith honey?"

"Mom…I'm sorry I…didn't finish getting everything ready…I haven't been feeling…to well."

"Nonsense, what are you doing on the floor?"

"I heard the phone and I was trying to answer…I think it was Derek…I don't know what happened."

"Let me help you up." Elizabeth said as she started to help Meredith but Meredith moaned in pain. "Meredith are you hurt?"

"I'm tired and…" Meredith didn't finish as she fell unconscious.

As soon as Meredith passed out Elizabeth yelled. "Meredith. Mark come quick."

Mark came running up the stairs as fast as he could and ran right to the bedroom. Once he entered the room and saw Elizabeth holding an unconscious Meredith. He made his way to her and knelt down in front of the two. "Meredith?"

Elizabeth started with tears. "She said she didn't feel well but she didn't say how she ended up on the floor. I tried to help her up and she passed out. What's wrong with her Mark?"

Mark helped lay Meredith down as he started to examine her. "She's burning up. We need to get her to the hospital now mom."

"I'll call the ambulance."

"No there's no time. Let's go." Mark said as he picked up Meredith and started for the door. "Seems like you've gained a little weight Mer." He said under his breath as he rushed down the stairs and out the door.

Elizabeth followed and got in the back seat first so she could hold Meredith. Mark quickly got in the front and started the car. As he was backing out he picked up his phone and pressed a familiar speed dial. "Addi."

"Hey Mark, how is mom, are you at Mer's?"

"Addi listen to me."

Addison stopped once she heard the worry in Mark's voice. "What's wrong Mark?"

"It's Mer."

"Mark."

"We're bringing her in. She passed out and is burning up. Can you meet us?"

"Have you told Derek?"

"I haven't called him yet. He was worried about her earlier because she wouldn't answer the phone. I think she passed out before we got to the house but I don't know how long. I don't know what to tell him." Mark said as he looked in the rear view mirror and saw Elizabeth speaking softly to Meredith who was still unconscious.

"He needs to know. I'll find him and meet you. How far away are you?"

"About 5 minutes at most."

"Okay, I'll see you soon. Love you."

"I love you too Addi."

Addison quickly hung up and paged Derek to the emergency room as she headed in that direction. Once she got there she saw Derek running to the same spot she was.

"You were paged too?"

"Derek I'm the one who paged you."

"Why?"

"Mark's coming in."

"What, he was going to the house did something happen?"

"Derek…" Addison looked at him but couldn't bring herself to say anything.

Derek watched her for a few moments and then it hit him. "What's wrong with Mer Addi?"

"I don't know for sure. Mark said she was burning up. She passed out and hasn't regained consciousness."

Derek immediately started to worry and he needed to see Meredith. "Where are they?"

"They should be here any minute Derek."

Before Derek could reply they saw Mark's car pull into the parking lot and drive up to them. Derek quickly went to the door and opened it up to get to Meredith. "Mom."

"It's okay honey, just help her."

Derek didn't need to be told twice. He quickly got Meredith out of the car and entered the hospital with Addison right behind him.

Derek took her into an exam room and gently laid her down on a gurney. He immediately started to examine her as the door opened and in walked the chief and Dr. Bailey. "What is going on here?"

"It's Mer Chief. She passed out and is burning up. I just started an exam."

"That's enough Dr. Sheppard. I can handle it from here." Miranda Bailey said as she tried to push Derek out of the way.

"Miranda, I have this."

Miranda shot a look to the chief who stepped forward and the placed a hand on Derek's arm. "Derek, you know you can't be in here. Go wait in the waiting room and as soon as we know what is going on with Meredith we will be right out to tell you."

"Chief." Derek pleaded.

"Derek you need to leave. I don't want to tell you again."

Derek looked from the Chief to Miranda and then back down to Meredith. He bent down and kissed her on the forehead before backing away from the table and heading outside. When he got to the door he turned around and looked at Addison. "Addi, are you coming?"

"I'll be there in a minute Derek."

Derek looked at Addi again and then left the room.

Once the door closed Miranda looked to Addison. "Is there something you need Dr. Sloan?"

"She's pregnant. I did the test yesterday and haven't had a chance to tell her yet. Derek doesn't know but you need to know for the tests you are about to perform. She's pregnant and can't lose this child no matter what."

Miranda and the chief were both looking at Addison as she spoke and they both nodded their understanding before Addison walked out of the room to join the rest of her family allowing Dr. Bailey and Dr. Webber to continue helping Meredith.

Addison made her way down the hall to the waiting room and found Mark, Derek, and Elizabeth waiting. She walked directly to Mark's open arms. "She's going to be okay Addi."

Addison nodded. "She has to be Mark."

The room was silent while they waited. They waited for what felt like hours before they saw Dr. Bailey and Dr. Webber approach them.

"How's Mer?"

"Derek…" Dr. Webber started however Dr. Bailey cut him off.

"My intern needs surgery. It's her appendix. We are prepping the OR as we speak so we need your consent Dr. Sheppard." Miranda paused and waited for Derek to speak however she saw the worry on his face so she decided to speak again as she placed her hand on his arm. "Derek, she will be okay. We just need to get her into surgery as soon as possible and I promise I will not let anything happen to Grey."

"Sheppard, her name is Sheppard."

Miranda smiled. "You're right. I won't let anything happen to Sheppard."

Derek nodded and Miranda and Richard both hurried back down the hall.

Once the surgery was over, Derek, Mark, Addison, and Elizabeth were seated around Meredith's bed waiting for her to wake up.

Derek noticed her starting to wake up so he leaned in close and saw her open her eyes. He smiled as he spoke. "Hey."

"Hey."

"How do you feel?"

"Sore but okay. What happened?"

"You scared me Mer. Mark and mom found you unconscious. Your appendix burst and Miranda and Richard had to take you into emergency surgery."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean too I just…I really thought it was just the flu."

"Just promise me that if anything like this happens again you will get it checked out."

"I promise Derek, I love you."

"I love you too." Derek finished as he gave her a kiss.

"Alright you too. Derek, Mark let's go get some coffee. I believe Addison needs to talk to Meredith alone."

"Mom?"

"We won't be gone lone dear, now let's go both of you. Don't make me tell you again."

Both men stood and made their way towards the door with Elizabeth. Once they were gone Addison approached the bed.

"What is it Addi?"

"Mer, the test came back."

"And?"

"You're pregnant Mer." Addison said with a smile.

Meredith immediately got tears in her eyes.

"Mer, what's wrong?"

"What if it happens again Addi? Derek can't go through that again. I don't want him to go through that again."

"Oh Mer. You know I can't promise that nothing will happen but I can promise that we will do everything we can to prevent anything from happening."

"How far?"

"Dr. Bailey said 12-16 weeks."

"16 weeks! That's 4 months, how could I not know I was pregnant for 4 months? What kind of mother am I?"

"Mer, you're an intern who works non-stop. That is going to stop by the way. But my point is you are stressed with work and you are a newlywed."

"I have noticed I've put on weight but I just thought it was because I wasn't eating healthy."

"Well now you know it's baby weight you are putting on."

Meredith thought for a moment and then looked up to Addison smiling. "So I'm pregnant."

Addison smiled and pulled her into a hug. "I'm really happy for you. You are going to be a great mother."

"Thank-you Addi."

"You're welcome Mer. Now I want to do an ultra sound as soon as possible, we need to check something for Dr. Bailey."

"Is something wrong?"

"No Dr. Bailey just…she wanted me to check and make sure she was right about how far along you are." Addison said quickly coming up with something.

"Okay."

"Now you just have to tell Derek."

"Tell Derek what?" Derek asked as he made his way back into the room.

"Come on Mark let's leave these two alone for a few minutes." Addison said as she pulled him towards the door.

"Wait I just got back."

"I know but you forgot to get me a coffee so let's go."

"You can go yourself I want to talk to Mer."

"Do you want to sleep on the couch as well?"

Mark looked at Addison before quickly giving in and following her out of the room as they heard Meredith and Derek softly laughing at the two.

"He never learns does he?"

"Well he didn't keep pushing, maybe he is learning."

"You might be right." Meredith replied and then got quiet for a moment before continuing. "Derek...I…there's something I need to tell you."

Derek watched Meredith and could tell she was struggling with what she was wanting to tell him. "Mer, you can tell me anything." Derek finished as he squeezed her hand.

"I saw Addi yesterday before I came home…she ran a test for me. I haven't spoke to her since but she got the results back. She was going to tell me tonight but she had to tell Dr. Bailey and well…she told me while you were getting coffee." Meredith paused and looked up into Derek's eyes. "I'm pregnant."

Derek heard her clearly but he didn't respond right away.

Meredith watched Derek and when he didn't say anything it scared her. Maybe he didn't want kids now. Tears came to her eyes and she looked away.

Derek saw Meredith's tears and when she looked away he immediately woke up from his trance. "Mer."

"I'm…I'm sorry Der. I…"

"What do you have to be sorry for?"

"I know we haven't talked about kids since we have been married. I should have been more careful about my birth control."

"Mer, look at me."

Meredith didn't turn her head to look at him.

Derek reached over and turned her head so she was facing him. "Please look at me Meredith."

Meredith heard the pleading in his voice and lifted her eyes to his.

"I am right now…this moment is the second happiest moment in my life. You are going to be okay and you just told me I am going to be a father."

"You're happy?"

"I am extremely happy. If you didn't have that incision I would pick you up and twirl you around this room." Derek said with a huge smile. "Are you happy?"

"I am but…I'm scared."

"Why?"

"I don't want to lose another baby Derek. We can't lose another baby."

"Oh Mer." Derek bent down and hugged her. "It's okay to be scared but we can't let that control us. We know there is no guarantee but I do believe that this time it is meant to be. I believe that it is our time to have a baby and I want to enjoy it."

Meredith saw how truly happy Derek was about their baby and had to admit that she was too. She smiled at him. "Okay."

Derek pulled her into a hug careful not to move her too much. "I love you Meredith Sheppard."

Meredith giggled. "I love you too Derek Sheppard."

Mark sat in a chair outside Meredith's room while Elizabeth and Addison walked away to get Addison some coffee.

"So you know?"

"Of course I know."

"How?"

"I had my suspicions when you didn't come back with Derek right away when he came to the waiting room. You confirmed it while we were waiting for her to wake up."

"How?"

"You kept looking at her stomach and then her face and back to her stomach."

"I don't want anything to happen to this baby. I know she wouldn't be able to handle losing another baby."

"I have a feeling this baby is going to make it."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Faith." Elizabeth smiled knowing how her son always said the same thing.

"Of course." Addison smiled as she stopped in front of a room. "I'll be just a minute, I need to grab something."

Elizabeth watched as Addison disappeared into the room and then returned pushing a machine. "What's this?"

"I'm going to do an ultra sound. Dr. Bailey said she found something and she wanted me to check it to see if she is right."

"Found something?"

Addison smiled. "All I can say is that if she is right Derek and Meredith are going to be shocked and Mark is going to be mad."

"Oh….OH." Elizabeth smiled.

The two made their way back to the room and found Mark still sitting in the chair.

Mark looked at the ultra sound machine. "Why do you have that?"

"Why do you think?" Addison replied with a smile as she pushed it into the room. "Are you ready?"

"Mom."

Elizabeth hurried over to the bed and gave Meredith a hug. "I'm so glad you are okay sweetheart, you had me worried."

"I'm sorry."

Elizabeth gave her another hug and whispered. "Don't be and congratulations."

Meredith pulled back and smiled. "Thank-you."

Addison had set everything up for the ultrasound. "Are we ready?"

"Is it okay for Mark and I to be here or do you want us to leave?"

Derek looked to Meredith who smiled and nodded slightly before Derek answered for them. "Stay, you're family."

Addison turned on the machine as Elizabeth and Mark made their way around to stand by Derek so they could see the screen. "Okay, here we go." Addison squeezed the gel on Meredith's stomach and started moving the probe around. An image came quickly to the screen. As she moved the probe she found that Bailey was right. "Wow."

"What is it Addi, I can't see?" Meredith asked trying to see the screen better.

"Maybe this will help." Addison answered as she flipped a switch and the room filled with a sound.

"Is that?"

"Yes Mer that's the…" Addison tried to answer however she was cut off by Mark.

"You have got to be kidding me."

All eyes quickly went to Mark who appeared to be pouting.

"What is it Mark?" Meredith asked worried.

Mark placed his hand on Derek's shoulder. "Why do you always have to one up me?"

Derek turned to Mark and the smile that was on his face grew as he hugged him.

"What is he talking about Addi?" Meredith asked still not knowing what was going on.

"Listen Mer and tell me what you hear?"

"Addi, I hear a heartbeat…two?"

Addison nodded.

"Twins?"

Addison nodded again.

Meredith squeezed Derek's hand and got his attention. "Twins Derek."

"I know Mer." Derek replied as he gave her a hug and whispered. "I love you."

"I love you too."

"Dr. Bailey appeared to be right on the timeframe as well. I would say you are 16 weeks. Do you want to know their sexes?"

"Yes." Both Meredith and Derek answered.

"Baby A," Addison said pointing to the screen, "is a boy, and Baby B is a girl."

Meredith and Derek both had tears in their eyes. "A little boy and girl. I can't believe it."

"You are perfect Mer."

They heard a sob and turned to see Elizabeth with tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Mom." Derek said as he let go of Meredith's hand and made his way to her.

"I'm so happy for you both Derek. I'm okay, I'm just so happy for you and Meredith. You both are going to be great parents and you are going to give me two more beautiful grand children." Elizabeth replied as Derek gave her a hug.

Addison turned off the screen and cleaned up Meredith while they all congratulated both Meredith and Derek on the two newest Sheppard's.

Mark and Addison took Elizabeth home to allow Meredith and Derek to enjoy their time together.

Meredith didn't have to spend too much time in the hospital since Elizabeth was there for a few days she stayed and helped take care of Meredith. When it came time for her to leave she vowed to return before the babies were due because she wanted to be there for their birth.

Four months later and Derek and Mark were back at the airport to pick up Elizabeth and Derek's sisters.

"Where is Meredith?"

Mark chuckled at Derek's expression. "I'm glad to see you too mom." Derek replied as he pulled her in for a hug.

"It's good to see you too dear. Now where is my daughter and me grand children?"

Derek chuckled, "She is with Addi and Lilly, sitting right over…there."

Derek didn't even get to finish before the other women in his life found his wife and took off towards her.

"I told you, none of you Sheppard's ever start with hello."

"Shut up Mark. Let's go."

Derek and Mark went over to the ladies. "Alright let's get your luggage and then get back to the house so Mer can rest before dinner."

"I do not need to rest Derek I am fine."

"I know Mer but remember what Addi said you need to be careful not to overdo it or the babies could come early."

"We are fine Derek."

"Okay you two let's get going now." Mark said as he motioned them all forward.

"Did you finally decide on names yet?

"We did Nancy but we decided not to tell each other until they are born."

"What do you mean tell each other?"

"Well, we were having trouble agreeing on names so Derek is picking our little girls name and I am picking our little boys name."

"That's so sweet."

"What if you don't like the names each of you picked out?"

"Not possible, we have talked about some names already so we just have to trust each other to know what we like."

"You two are disgusting."

"Thanks Mark."

The group got their luggage and loaded into the cars. They went to Meredith and Derek's house to figure out plans for dinner. It was decided that everyone would stay with Derek and Meredith since they had the room.

A few nights after everyone's arrival, Meredith woke up when the babies became very active and decided to take a warm bath hoping to calm them down.

"Hey."

"Hey did I wake you?"

"Not really, I just reached for you and you were gone. Are you okay?"

"They are active and I was trying to calm them down. What time is it?"

"It's two am."

"Wow, I've been in here for 30 minutes. Can you help me out? Maybe they will let me get some sleep now."

Derek helped Meredith out of the tub and helped her dry off and get dressed. They made their way back into the bedroom and laid down. "Are they better?"

"Yeah, they must be sleeping."

The two drifted off to sleep.

"Derek!" Meredith yelled as she sat straight up in bed grabbing her stomach.

"What is it Mer?" Derek said still half asleep.

"Derek…Derek wake up, we need to go now." Meredith exclaimed as she grabbed her stomach.

Derek slowly sat up rubbing his eyes trying to focus on Meredith. "What is it Mer?"

"I think it's time for the babies…" Meredith rubbed her stomach with her hands as a contraction hit. Once it was finished she looked back to Derek. "Yeah now would be a good time to go."

Derek jumped out of bed and started getting dressed. "Has your water broke, how far apart are the contractions?"

"I don't know Derek, I just woke up but…my water broke." Meredith said as she pulled the covers back and saw that the bed was wet.

Derek quickly got dressed and went over to help Meredith out of the bed and started for the door as Meredith spoke again. "Derek you have to…mom and your sisters…you have to let them know it's time."

"Mer?"

"Go, I'll wait here and then you can help me down the stairs."

Derek quickly walked down the hall and knocked on each door telling them to get up because the babies were coming. As he moved on to the next Meredith noticed the lights come on and heard the movement. Once he had woke everyone he ran back to Meredith and noticed the tears and worry in her eyes when she finally looked up to him. "It's going to be okay Mer."

"Their 4 weeks early Derek, what if Addi missed something?"

"Stop that right now Meredith Sheppard. Addison is the best OB/GYN and you know she wouldn't let anything happen to you or those babies. Now Derek go get her stuff in the car and then come back in while I help Meredith down the steps. Your sisters will be right out." Elizabeth said as she watched Derek give Meredith a look before quickly taking her bag down. "Come on dear, nice and easy."

"Mom." Meredith paused on the steps as another contraction hit.

"You're doing great Meredith, breathe through it."

Once the contraction was over they were able to make it down the stairs as the others joined them. Meredith sat up front with Derek so she could hold his hand while the others climbed in the back.

Another contraction hit and Meredith grabbed Derek's hand. He flinched slightly but didn't say anything knowing that Meredith was in more pain than him.

"Derek, you have to call Addi."

Derek quickly pulled out his phone and dialed a familiar number.

"Derek?"

"Addi Mer's in labor can you meet us at the hospital?"

"Of course I'm on my way. Alex, George, Christina, and Izzie are all there. I'll have them meet us. How far apart are the contractions?"

Derek paused as he thought about it and something in the pit of his stomach started to grow. "There are close Addi, and her water has already broke."

"Okay don't panic Derek be safe but get to the hospital as soon as you can and we'll meet you there."

"Thanks."

"Mark, let's go."

"What…what's going on?"

"Mer's in labor. They're on their way to the hospital. We need to go now."

Mark and Addison quickly got dressed and got Lilly ready before rushing out the door.

_There you have it chapter 20. I know I didn't go all the way through her pregnancy however I have never been pregnant so I wouldn't know how to wright the different stages with the cravings and mood swings and so on. I hope it didn't take away from the chapter. And if you have time can you please review and let me know what you think. Thank-you all to those still reading and an extra thank-you to those of you who have reviewed. I do want to let you know that this story is now coming to an end. I have one more chapter left and maybe an epilogue. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy I wish I did so I wouldn't have to wait each week to know what was going to happen._

Chapter 20


	21. Chapter 21

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy._

Chapter 21

When they pulled up in front of the hospital they found Izzie, Christina, Alex, and George waiting with a wheelchair. Derek quickly stepped out and ran around to help Meredith. George parked the car so Derek could stay with Meredith.

They quickly entered Seattle Grace and started for the elevator. Before reaching the elevator, Addison and Mark joined the group. "Meredith how far apart are the contractions?" Addison asked once they were in the elevator.

"I haven't timed them."

Addison looked to Derek and Derek responded. "Maybe 4-5 minutes. I didn't look at my watch but it takes about 10 minutes to get here and she had 2 contractions in the car."

They arrived to a delivery room and Addison instructed Derek to help Meredith change while her and Mark stepped into the hall just as George and the other interns joined them.

"How is she?"

"I haven't examined her yet." Addison said in an unfamiliar voice to the others which caused everyone to look at her.

"What are you worried about Mcwife?"

"Christina not now."

"It's fine Izzie. It's just that the contractions are really close and something doesn't feel right about this."

Just as Addison finished her statement Derek opened the door. "Addi she's ready and she had another contraction."

"Ok I'm coming." Addison entered the room with another intern and a nurse. Addison went to Meredith and started her exam as the intern started an ultrasound to check on the babies. Addison looked up to Meredith. "Meredith Sheppard how long have you been in labor?"

Meredith could not answer because she was breathing through another contraction. Derek took his eyes off Meredith and turned to Addison. "Addi?"

"She's crowning Derek."

"Dr. Sloan?"

"What is it?" Addison asked as she walked over to the intern to look at the ultra sound. "Dr. Smith go prep the OR." The intern nodded and quickly left the room.

Meredith was having another contraction so Derek asked the question for both of them. "What's the matter Addi, why do you need an OR?"

"We need to do a caesarian. Your little boy hasn't turned yet and we need to get him out."

"What about our little girl Addi? You said she's crowning, why can't you deliver her now and then get him?"

Meredith had finished another contraction and had tears running down her face. "Addi you have to save them both. You can't…you have to save them both. I'm sorry I didn't come earlier…please don't punish them for my stupidity Addi…you have to save them."

Addison stepped closer to Meredith and grabbed her hand. "Listen to me Meredith. You are not stupid. This is your first pregnancy and I have no doubt that you would have been here sooner if you knew you were in labor. And Meredith, you are not going to lose either of your babies do you understand?" Addison watched as Meredith nodded her head. She then looked up to Derek. "Go change so you can be with your wife."

Derek nodded and went to leave however Meredith didn't let go of his hand. "No, I don't want you to go."

"Mer it's okay. I'll go fast, it will only be a couple minutes. Addi will be here with you and I'll send Alex in. I'll be right back I promise."

Meredith let go of Derek's hand and Derek left as he said and Alex appeared in the room. "Grey have you ever thought of doing things the easy way?"

"Alex."

"It's okay Addi, he's being Alex." Meredith then turned to Alex. "If you don't watch it I'll change my mind about letting you come with us."

"Alex go make sure the OR is ready, as soon as Derek gets here we will bring Mer in."

Alex nodded and gave Meredith a kiss on the forehead before heading out the door.

After another contraction Meredith turned her head to look Addison in the eyes. "Addison?"

"What is it?"

"I want you to promise me something."

"Okay."

"Promise me you will save both of my babies."

"Don't be silly Meredith, I already told you both of your babies will be fine."

"Promise me Addi."

Addison saw the desperate look from Meredith. "I promise you that you and your babies will be fine."

The door burst open and Derek came back into the room. Addison smiled and both her and Derek started to take her out of the room to the OR. Once they got out into the hall all their friends were waiting for them. George, Izzie, and Christina helped roll her bed while Addison stepped back to walk beside Mark. "What's wrong Addi?"

"The little boy is breach and the little girl is crowning. If I don't get them both out fast, we could lose both of them."

"Do you think you can't do it?"

"No I know I can, I've done thousands of deliveries like this before. It's just that something feels wrong about this. Where is everyone?"

"They went to the gallery. I'm going to join them and Christina said she would make sure it was only family. Mom and the girls are in the waiting room."

"Good, that's good."

They stopped in front of the OR door. Mark pulled her into a hug. "I'll be watching, I love you."

"I love you too Mark." Addison then entered the scrub room and quickly scrubbed in. When she was done she entered the OR. "Okay Mr. and Mrs. Sheppard are you ready to have your babies?" Both nodded as she took her spot at the table. Addison took a deep breath and looked up to see Mark smiling. She then glanced at Christina, Izzie, and George who were watching happily waiting for the newest Sheppard arrivals. She then glanced at Alex, "Ready?" He nodded. "Scalpel."

Addison made the incision and soon the first baby was out. "It's a boy. Daddy do you want to cut the cord?"

Derek quickly stood and cut the cord. After he heard his son take his first breath and let out a cry he went back to Meredith and gave her a kiss. "He's beautiful."

After handing the baby to a nurse she went back to work to get the second baby.

After a few minutes of not hearing any other cries Meredith looked into her husband's eyes with tears in hers. "I don't hear her Derek, why don't I hear her?"

Derek stood and looked to see Addison pull out his baby girl. "Addison?"

Addison looked up to Alex. "She's not breathing, we need to work fast." Addison said as she stepped away from the table with the baby. Alex followed her.

"Addison?"

"Derek I don't hear anything."

"Addison?"

Addison worked fast not wanting to answer Derek unless she could tell him everything was okay. All of a sudden the little girl let out a cry. Everyone exhaled the breaths they were holding. "It's a girl." Addison smiled as she held her up for Derek to see.

Derek sat back down after he saw his daughter. "She's as beautiful as her brother." Derek said as he leaned over and kissed her. When he pulled away he knew something was wrong.

Meredith's smile faded from her face as she looked into Derek's eyes. "Take care of them Derek."

"NO!"

"Thank-you for teaching me how to love, tell them I love them and I'm sorry I couldn't be there for them. I love you Derek."

"NO Mer, Addison?" Derek yelled again seeing his wife lose consciousness.

Addison handed the baby to the nurse as soon as she heard Derek yell and had made it back to the table with Alex following. They looked down and saw all the blood. She looked up and locked eyes with Mark for a second and she heard Derek yell again as she went to work on stopping the bleeding.

"Meredith NO. You can't do this to me, to us. Do you hear me Mer you can't leave us. I won't let you leave us."

"Alex get him out of here, Dr. Smith close the gallery."

"No, I'm not leaving her Addi. I'm not leaving my wife." Derek yelled with tears in his eyes.

"Alex get him out of here now. I can't do this with him here." Addison shouted. When she glanced up to Alex she saw the pleading look in his eyes. "Come back just get him out of here."

Alex nodded and grabbed Derek. He started pulling him to the doors.

"No, you can't do this. I can't leave her. She needs me, she can't be alone, she hates being alone."

"Derek you can't help her now. Let Addison and I do our job."

Mark had seen the blood as soon as he heard Derek yell and after he saw the fear in Addison's eyes he knew it was bad. He immediately went down to the scrub room. When he got there he saw Alex trying to force Derek out of the OR. "What's going on?"

"Addison wants him out of the OR. She said she can't have him in there."

"I can't leave her Mark. She can't be alone, you know she hates being alone."

Mark glanced at Addison who was franticly working on Meredith and then he looked back to Derek. "She's not alone Derek. You need to let Addison and Alex help her." Derek was still struggling so Mark grabbed his shoulders. "Derek! You can't save her right now. You need to let them do this."

Derek stopped struggling and allowed Mark to lead him out of the scrub room.

Alex went back in to help Addison.

Mark led Derek down the hall to the nursery where they found the others watching the new Sheppard's. When they approached they all turned to them. Mark spoke. "We don't know yet. Addi and Alex are still working on her."

"She will be fine."

"You don't know that Barbie."

"I do. Christina she loves those babies and her husband so much…she won't leave them."

"She may not have a choice."

"George." Mark said sternly.

"She told me to take care of them."

Mark and the others turned their attention to Derek who was sitting on the ground with his back to the wall and his knees pulled up.

Mark took a seat next to him while the others sat down across from the two.

"She told me to take care of them and…and she thanked me for teaching her how to love. She said to tell them she loved them and she was sorry she couldn't be with them and that she loved me."

"She won't give up Derek, you have to know that. Mer is a fighter. With all the crap she has been through, she won't give up and leave her family." Izzie said.

"Barbie is right." Christina said as she stood up.

"Where are you going?" George asked.

"To work. Page me when she gets into her room." Christina answered and then walked away.

Mark placed his hand on Derek's forearm and gave it a squeeze. "She's a fighter Derek and you know how much she loves you and those kids. She won't leave you."

"It was like she was saying goodbye Mark."

"Did she say goodbye?"

"No."

"Then she will be okay. Do you really think she would let you raise those kids alone? Do you remember the last time you changed Lilly's diaper? And what about when her and Addi spent the weekend at that resort and spa? She said herself she would never leave us alone with a child again and Addi backed her up. She will be okay Derek."

"I can't live without her Mark."

"I know and you won't have too. Addi and Alex aren't going to let her leave us." Mark finished and the four remaining friends fell into silence.

After a few minutes Derek stood up and walked to the window. While he was looking in more tears came to his eyes. He felt a presence beside him when he spoke. "She didn't even get to see them, and we didn't get to give them their names yet."

Mark sighed as he put his hand on Derek's shoulder. "She will see them Derek and you will name them together. You remember when you first told me about Mer?" Mark saw Derek nod slightly as he continued. "You were talking about faith. Derek you have always talked about having faith when it comes to Mer." Mark stopped and turned Derek to face him. "Don't lose that faith now, not when she needs you the most."

"Derek!"

"Mom."

"How is she? How is Meredith and the twins?"

Derek looked at his mother and sisters all of them had smiles on their faces because they didn't know what had happened. Derek was too worried about staying by Meredith's side while Mark had stayed with Derek knowing his brother needed him the most.

Mark knew right away that Derek wouldn't be able to tell the rest of the family what had happened so he quickly stepped up and pulled them to the side allowing Derek to go back to watching his two children and thinking about Meredith.

After Mark finished explaining everything that had happened Nancy spoke, "Mark is she…is she going to be alright?"

"Addi is with her now, we don't know anything yet."

"Answer your sister Mark."

"Mom you know I can't give you an answer…at least not the one you want."

Elizabeth looked down the hall towards Derek. She slowly made her way to him.

Derek felt her beside him. He was trying so hard to hold it together for his children, his friends, his family however all his strength left once she spoke.

Elizabeth placed her hand on Derek's shoulder. "Derek, honey."

Derek turned into her waiting arms and let the tears fall freely. In his mother's arms he didn't have to be the strong husband anymore and for some reason that was the most comfort he felt since he had left Meredith's side in the OR. "I can't lose her mom. I don't know how to live without her in my life."

"Sshh honey…we are not going to lose her. You are not going to lose her."

Derek pulled back from her arms and looked her in the eyes. "There was so much blood and…we didn't even get to name them yet."

She saw the sadness in his eyes and her heart broke more for her son and his family that was supposed to be just beginning. "Stop it Derek." Elizabeth saw the shocked look on her son's face and she decided to continue right away. "You are acting like she is gone. That women is not going to leave you and your children alone and I know that Addison would never let her leave you alone with them. I have heard the stories of you and Mark with Lilly. You are the one who has always talked about having faith…Derek don't lose that now, not when you need it most."

"That's what I said."

Derek could tell that his mother had no doubt what so ever in her eyes and he saw the small smile on her lips. He glanced at Mark quickly who also had a smile. He decided to listen to his family. "It wasn't the same."

"Are you kidding me?"

"No."

"Alright you two enough. Mark sit down here with us, let's say a prayer." Elizabeth and the rest of the family said a prayer as they all held hands. When they were finished Elizabeth looked to Derek, "Now I would like to meet my grandchildren."

At the mention of his children Derek lit up. He stood up and helped his mother to the window where he pointed out his two children. For the next half hour they all stood watching the babies and talking before they heard the clicking coming down the hallway.

Mark and Derek knew immediately that it was Addison and both turned to see her approaching. When they turned the rest of the Sheppard's stopped talking and turned towards her as well.

Alex was walking with her and when they came to a stop in front of everyone he spoke first. "Where are the others?"

"They went to work. We are suppose to page them."

"How's Mer?"

"I'm going to go page the others." Alex said before moving down the hall.

"Addi?"

"She…she lost a lot of blood Derek." Addison paused to gather her thoughts before continuing. "She's in recovery and I left instructions to move her to her room in an hour. She hasn't woken up yet Derek."

"But she will wake up right Addi?"

"Derek."

"Please Addi just tell me that she will be okay."

"Derek she made it through the delivery. She lost a lot of blood but I was able to stop the bleeding and save her uterus. If she wakes up in the next 24 hours…"

"She'll wake up. What room?"

"Derek."

"What room Addi?"

Addison looked from Derek to Mark then to Elizabeth and the other sisters before looking back to Derek. "4310."

Derek didn't say anything else before running down the hall towards her room.

"Addi." Mark said her name softly knowing she was ready to break. He saw her look up to him before he pulled her into his arms and she broke down into sobs. "Sshh it's okay Addi, you did good."

"What if…she lost so much blood. What if…"

"Stop that."

Addison pulled away from Mark and looked to Elizabeth.

"You did everything you could Addison and I know Meredith is not going to leave those precious babies with my son. I love him dearly but I know how well he changes a diaper. She would not subject her children to that. Now let's get you something to eat before we go to her room and wait for sleeping beauty to wake up."

Addison chuckled a little as she let a small smile spread across her face. "Thanks mom."

Elizabeth gave Addison a hug as the group headed down the hall.

Derek ran as fast as he could to her room. In the back of his mind he was afraid. Afraid of what he would find but he knew she was alive and that's what he held on to. Now he just had to get to her so that he could make sure she stayed that way.

Once he reached her door he took a deep breathe to calm his nerves before he slowly pushed open the door and entered. When he walked further into the room he saw her. And let out the breathe that he had been holding. "Mer." He whispered out as he quickly made his way to the side of her bed and grabbed her hand. Squeezing slightly he took in her appearance. She was pale which he knew was due to the loss of blood but it still caught him off guard. She looked so peaceful with her eyes closed, her breathing was even and then he realized how quiet the room was without her soft snoring that should have been there.

He quickly pulled close one of the chairs that was in the room and took a seat not once letting go of her hand. Once he sat he looked back up at her and started talking. "Mer, you have no idea how much you scarred me. I know you didn't mean to but you have to promise never to do anything like that ever again. You have to wake up Mer our family can't go on without you and you need to give our son his name. I know you didn't get to see them yet but they are so amazing. Our little girl looks just like you, she even scrunches her nose right before she lets out a cry, or maybe she's going in her diaper." He paused to chuckle before continuing. "Whatever the reason it is just like when you scrunch up your nose. Mom said our little boy looks just like me when I was a baby. I guess she is right but I am grateful he also has your nose. They haven't opened their eyes yet so I don't know if they have yours or mine but Mer, they are beautiful and they need their momma. I need you Mer, remember what you said about me changing diapers. I know you have been through so much in your life and each time you have pushed through and come out so much stronger. You amaze me Mer and I am so proud and grateful that you are my wife. I need you to push through this Mer. I need you to come back to me and our children. I'm here for you and I promise I'm not going anywhere, I love you Mer."

There was a soft knock on the door and in came the rest of their family minus the interns. Elizabeth and Nancy quickly went to the other side of the bed from Derek and both gave Meredith a soft kiss on the forehead. Mark and Addison went to stand next to Derek while the other sisters went to the end of the bed.

"She's so pale."

"It's because of the blood loss but she will get her color back mom."

"Has there been any change Derek?"

Derek simply shook his head no to Nancy's question.

There was another knock on the door as two nurses made their way into the room with the babies. "Dr. Sheppard it's time for their first feeding."

Derek turned his head towards them but didn't let go of Meredith's hand. "Addi, Mom can you?"

"Derek Michael Sheppard I know you are hurting right now and you want to be here for Meredith but don't you think she would want you to take care of your children?"

Derek looked at his mom and then Meredith before looking back to his mom. He nodded as he slowly let go of Meredith's hand and approached the nurses. "Mom, can you help?"

"Of course." Elizabeth replied as she made her way over to the babies.

"Was she going to breast feed?"

"No, we talked about it and we decided that with the two of them it would be easier if we bottle feed them from the beginning so I could help out."

"I think that's a great idea dear. Now who do I get to feed?"

"Go ahead and grab your grandson, I'll take this little angel." Derek took his little girl from the nurse as his mother took his son. They each took a bottle and Derek went back to the bed and took his seat next to Meredith before he started feeding his daughter. He watched as she latched on and started right away.

"She eats just like her mom." Mark chuckled from beside him.

Derek smiled. "She does. How is he doing mom?"

"He's doing good. He didn't like it at first but he seems to have figured it out."

"Good."

The family watched as the babies where fed. Once they were done they were passed around so everyone got a chance to hold them before Derek's sisters went back to the house.

Derek, Elizabeth, Mark, and Addison stayed in the room with the babies who were now sleeping. Mark and Addison were on the couch sleeping while Derek and Elizabeth held the sleeping babies.

Derek noticed his mom was having trouble keeping her eyes open. "Mom, why don't you put her down?"

"She's okay dear."

"Mom you are about ready to fall asleep." Derek said as he gently laid his son next to Meredith and walked around to take his daughter. He then laid her on the other side of Meredith and made his way back over to the other side of the bed where he sat back down and took Meredith's hand while watching his children and Meredith.

Elizabeth looked at the new family and didn't argue. She sat back in the chair and slowly fell asleep.

Derek put his head down next to Meredith keeping one hand holding hers while the other arm reached across her body so he was holding the three of them.

"Oh, look at you two. You are so beautiful. Are you hungry? You both are wide awake and you both have your daddies eyes, yes you do. I hope you keep the Sheppard eyes although I'll have to figure something out for when you start dating. And you little angel, I think your daddy will end up with a shot gun by the time you start dating." Meredith giggled as she watched her children's eyes look at her.

Derek quickly woke once he heard her giggle. When he looked up he saw her eyes were open and she was holding their children tightly in her arms. "Mer."

Meredith heard his whisper and looked over towards her husband. "Hey."

"Hey."

"They are beautiful."

"They are just like their mother. How long have you been awake?"

"Not long although I think these two might be hungry."

Derek looked at his watch. "It has been a couple hours since they first ate. What do you say we name them before I go get the nurse so we can feed them?"

"Okay. You first."

"Megan Sharlene Sheppard. I remember you said Sharlene was a family name and I know your family hasn't been there for you but they gave me you and I was thinking that maybe this is their second chance plus it means strong and you are the strongest women I know. And I've always liked Megan."

"It's perfect Derek." Meredith said with tears in her eyes. She then looked down towards her daughter and looked her in the eyes. "Hello Megan Sharlene Sheppard. I'm your mommy and this is your daddy."

Megan let out a small gurgle in reply. Meredith and Derek both chuckled. "I think she likes it. Now what about him?"

Meredith looked back up to Derek before answering. "Michael Sloan Sheppard."

Derek didn't know what to say as tears came to his eyes.

Meredith saw the tears and immediately tried to fix it. "I can change it if you want but I just thought, well I know I didn't know your dad but from everything you and your mom and sisters have told me he was an amazing man and you are an amazing man so I thought our son will be just as amazing and Sloan, well I know it's a little unusual but he is your best friend and him and Addi have been by our sides through everything and I couldn't really name our son after Addi so I hope she understands because I think I owe her that after she delivered them and she did make us Lilly's godparents but if you really don't like it then…"

Derek did the only thing he knew would stop her rambling without telling her to be quiet. He leaned in carefully not to disturb his children and kissed her. Pulling back he smiled at her. "It's perfect and just so you know, you are an amazing women yourself." Derek looked down to his son who was still looking up towards his mother. "Hello Michael Sloan Sheppard. I'm your daddy and this is your mommy." Michael did just as his sister did and gurgled a little. "I guess that means he likes it just like I do."

"I'm glad. They really are perfect Derek. I can't believe they are ours."

Derek was about to respond when he heard a sniffle. He looked up and saw his mom who had tears coming from her eyes and then he saw Addison standing next to her with tears and an arm around his mother. Mark was standing next to Addison with his arm around her and he had a huge smile on his face. Derek looked back to Meredith. "Are you really sure about the name?"

Meredith saw Mark's smile and knew what Derek was talking about but she just giggled.

"I'm glad sleeping beauty has woken up. You gave us quite the scare there young lady."

"I'm sorry mom. I didn't mean too."

"I know. I'm so glad you are alright dear." She bent down and gave her a kiss on the cheek. "Now can you officially introduce me to my grand children?"

"Of course. This is Megan Sharlene Sheppard. Megan, meet your grandma."

Elizabeth smiled down at her granddaughter as she ran her finger along her check. "You are beautiful Megan, and welcome to the family."

"And this is.." Meredith trailed off as she looked to Derek to continue a little worried about Elizabeth's reaction.

Derek noticed her hesitation and immediately spoke up. "This mom, is Michael Sloan Sheppard. Michael, meet your grandma."

"I hope it's okay mom. I know I didn't know him but…"

"Meredith, Michael would be…I'm sure he is very proud to know that you decided to name your first born after him." Elizabeth paused before looking down towards her grandson. "You are very handsome…Michael and welcome to the family."

Mark being Mark stepped forward and grabbed Michael from Meredith's arms. "You munchkin have a very good name even though your silly mommy only gave it to you as a middle name. At least every time you do something bad we will be hearing it." Mark paused and bent his head closer however still spoke so the others could hear. "As your uncle and godfather it is my job to make sure we hear it quite often."

Addison softly hit him on the back and then bent down to move the blanket so she could see Michael. "Don't worry, Aunt Addi will help your mommy keep him in line."

"I'll be holding you to that Addi." Derek said now sitting next to Meredith on the bed.

"We're glad your back Mer. And your children are beautiful even though you named your son after my husband."

Meredith smiled while Derek spoke up knowing what Meredith was thinking. "Addi, is she okay?"

Addison explained what had happened during the delivery and explained what she had done to stop the bleeding. Once she was done Meredith decided to speak up. "Addi, can I…right now isn't an option but in the future, can I maybe have more children?"

Addison smiled as she gave Meredith's hand a squeeze. "You can defiantly have more children."

"Thank-you Addi."

"Your welcome Mer."

All of a sudden there was a cry and everyone looked down towards Mark who was frowning. "I didn't do anything."

"He's hungry Mark." Meredith said with a smile. "Derek can you?"

"I'll get the nurse." Addison said as she left the room. It didn't take long before she came back with two bottles. She handed one to Mark and one to Meredith.

"Derek?"

"Go ahead Mark. Are you okay Mer?"

"I'm perfect Derek. Are you okay?"

"I'm perfect." Derek replied as he watched his wife feed his daughter.

Once they were done eating they soon fell asleep. A nurse came in and took them back to the nursery to allow Derek some time with Meredith and Mark, Addison, and Elizabeth decided to head home.

"Goodnight you two, I'll be back with your sisters in the morning so you can officially introduce them to their niece and nephew. You two get some sleep." Elizabeth finished and gave both Derek and Meredith a kiss and hug. As she hugged Meredith she whispered into her ear. "You should be very proud of yourself Meredith. You became an adult despite everything that was thrown at you and I want you to know that I am very proud of you for that and for making my son happy. Plus you gave me two beautiful grandchildren today."

Meredith closed her eyes not wanting the tears to fall. "Thank-you mom…just thank-you."

"Come on mom, Addi and I will give you a ride back to the house."

Elizabeth pulled back from Meredith and wiped her tears as Meredith wiped her eyes. "Thank-you Mark."

"We'll be back in the morning, let us know if you need anything."

"Maybe some breakfast." Meredith said with a smile as she gave both Mark and Addison a hug and a kiss.

"Always thinking about food aren't you?"

"Of course. Thank-you both for being here."

"We wouldn't be anywhere else Mer. Now get some rest and we'll see you in the morning."

"Thanks Addi and drive safe Mark." Derek replied.

Derek and Meredith watched the three walk out of the room before Derek climbed into the bed fully with Meredith.

Meredith moved over slightly to give Derek some room as she fit into him perfectly.

"I'm glad you came back."

"There's nowhere else I would go Der. I'm sorry I scared you."

"Just promise you won't do it again."

"I promise I love you and our children more than I ever thought possible thanks to you."

"I didn't do anything Mer."

"You taught me how to love Der. I didn't think it was possible to feel this way but with you…"

"You let me love you and when it is our time to go home, we are going to go together and we are going to be 110 years old."

"You sound so sure."

"We have two children to take care of and as you said more in the future. With all the kids you are planning I would say at least 110."

"So you heard that did you?"

"Of course I did and don't think I will ever forget it."

"I know. I love you Derek."

"I love you too Meredith. Now get some sleep. I'm sure the sisters will be here first thing in the morning along with our friends."

Meredith turned slightly to give Derek a kiss before falling asleep. Derek waited to hear the soft snores before he allowed himself to sleep with a smile on his face happy to know that his entire family was alive and well.

_There you have it and I hope you enjoyed! I started the Epilogue which should be up within the week. As always if you have a chance I would love to hear what you think and a huge Thank-you to everyone still reading and to those who reviewed the last chapter._


	22. Chapter 22 Epilogue

_Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's Anatomy._

_Epilogue_

It was three years later and a lot has happened. George is engaged to a nurse now and is extremely happy. Christina married Burke two years ago surprising all of her friends but she is happy. Izzie and Alex married a year ago and Izzie is 3 months pregnant. Dr. Webber retired a year ago and Burke took over as chief. Derek and Mark both decided that their families needed them more than the hospital did.

"Are you sure about this Mer?"

"Of course I am Addi. It's perfect, I can't wait to see their reaction."

"Should we wait until mom gets here?"

"No let's do it tonight and then we both can go with to get mom from the airport tomorrow."

"Okay."

Meredith and Addison finished their shopping and headed back out to the car to drive back to Meredith and Derek's house.

"Daddy, daddy, daddy."

"What is it Meggie?"

"Mikey won't share his juice."

Derek looked over to the hall and saw Michael entering the living room. "Michael why aren't you sharing?"

Michael looked down as he approached the couch. "I sorry daddy it gone."

"Well let's get you some more and Meggie, I'll get you your own okay?"

"Kay daddy."

"Where is Lilly?"

"I'm right here daddy. M and M wanted more juice but I couldn't reach, sorry daddy."

"It's okay Lilly. We can help."

"Uncle Mak can I have apple?"

"You can have whatever you want Michael Sloan."

"Are you ever going to stop middle naming my son when he has done nothing wrong?" Derek asked as they all made their way to the kitchen.

"No, Mer gave him a good name and it needs to be used. When are Addi and Mer due back?"

"I think any minute. Mer didn't say where they were going." Derek said and then turned to the kids. "Did mommy say where she was going guys?"

"No Uncle Derek she just said that we needed to be good for you and daddy."

Hearing a car drive up the kids ran out of the room.

"I guess they are home. We better go help with the bags." Derek sighed as he and Mark made their way out of the kitchen. They went outside and saw all the bags that the two women had brought home with them. "Mer, what did you get?"

"Nice to see you too Der. We didn't get much." Meredith gave him a kiss before grabbing a bag and her children and starting towards the house. "Just put everything in the living room and we will be down in a minute."

"You too Mark. Lilly and I are going with them." Addison called over her shoulder as she followed the other three into the house with Lilly.

Derek and Mark both stood with their mouths open before turning back to the car and grabbing the bags.

"It's pretty mommy."

"Yes it is Meggie. I'm glad you like your new shirt. Can you sit on your bed while I help Michael?"

"Kay Mommy."

"Thank-you for my new shirt Mommy."

"You're welcome, now just wait a minute before we go show your daddy."

"Okay, we're ready." Meredith said as she stood and grabbed both hands of her children.

Addison looked at the kids and then back at Meredith. "Okay let's do this." Addison looked back to her daughter. "Lilly. Can you take Michael and Megan down to show Daddy and Uncle Derek your new shirts?"

"Okay Mommy. Are you and Aunt Mer coming?"

"We are going to be right behind you. Go ahead."

Addison and Meredith watched the kids leave the room. After they heard them enter the living room they started down the stairs. They smiled when they heard the three voices.

"Daddy look at our new shirts."

Derek and Mark both looked over to the kids who had entered the room and came running up to them. Lilly stood in front of Mark while Megan and Michael practically jumped into Derek's lap.

"Okay you two monkey's what has you so excited?" Derek asked.

Mark on the other hand was speechless as he had already saw the shirt Lilly was wearing. "Where is your mother?"

"Let me see." Derek said once he got his two children to settle on his lap. He looked them over and realized like Mark had what the shirts said. "Where is Mommy?"

Meredith and Addison stepped into the room with smiles on their faces. Just as they did all three children pointed to them.

Derek and Mark both stood after making sure their children were settled on the couch and approached the two women.

"Mer?"

"Addi?"

"I hope it's okay Der. I know we haven't talked about it recently but Addi confirmed it."

"How far?"

"8 weeks."

"Twins?"

"No, there is only one this time."

"Are you happy?"

"Are you happy?"

"I asked you first."

"I am very happy Derek."

Derek didn't say anything, instead he smiled as he went to kiss and hug her.

"I just found our Mark."

"How far along?"

"9 weeks."

"Addi, I'm…"

"Are you okay Mark?"

"I am very okay Addi. I love you."

"I love you too Mark." Addi finished before Mark pulled her into a hug and kiss.

"EW no kissy."

The four adults pulled back and started laughing at the kids who were all staring at them with funny faces.

"You would think they would be use to it." Derek and Mark replied at the same time causing Meredith and Addison to laugh harder.

Once they calmed down they started dinner. Meredith still wasn't allowed to cook but she helped with anything they would let her help with.

Meredith sat at the kitchen bar watching her husband and two friends move around the kitchen. 'I did it. I really did it. I became an adult despite everything. I have a family that loves me and two children who are relying on me to help them become adults and now we have another on the way. This is my happily ever after. I guess I was wrong, dark and twisty me does get a happily ever after.' Meredith thought as she smiled.

Derek noticed the look on Meredith's face. She was smiling but he could tell she was thinking. He made his way to her side. "You okay?"

"I've never been better Der."

"What are you thinking about?"

"I'm thinking about my happily ever after."

Derek smiled. "This is it right?"

"It is. Thank-you for everything. You taught me how to love and be happy. I didn't think it was possible but I became an adult thanks to you, our friends, and our family. You taught me to believe in happily ever after because you are giving it to me Der. Thank-you!"

"No need to thank me. You Meredith Sheppard are my happily ever after. You and our kids. I love you!"

"I love you too!" Meredith said as she gave him a kiss.

They both pulled apart as they heard the kids come into the kitchen looking for dinner. Both turned to see Mark and Addison smiling at them knowing they had heard everything that was said. Meredith smiled and mouthed Thank-you to both of them. She saw their heads nod slightly before Derek pulled her back to him and they stood watching their family that would soon have two more joining them in eight months.

_There you have it, the end. I hope you enjoyed reading as I have enjoyed writing! I would love to hear any final thoughts from anyone still reading. Thank-you to everyone still reading and to those who have reviewed, it really meant a lot to hear your thoughts. _

Epilogue


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